Chapter 10

Chapter

Ten

Lily wondered what had happened between Walker and Clint as they went home to change and then drove to her ranch. He didn’t offer anything and she didn’t know how to bring it up. They ate lunch with her family, played card games, went on a long walk with everyone, and then watched some preseason football games. They headed home after dinner.

Not her home. Clint’s home. She loved this house and wished some day she could make it hers.

Clint had been great all day hanging out with everyone—fun, happy, teasing—but as they drove home, he was quiet. They walked into the house, and she glanced at the decorative clock on the fireplace mantle. Seven-thirty. What were they going to do with themselves? Go on another walk?

She stopped in the kitchen and glanced up at him. He’d taken off his cowboy hat and boots in the laundry room. He ruffled his hair and smiled down at her, but it was guarded. “Thanks for a nice day.”

A nice day. Intriguing.

“I’m sorry we didn’t go spend time with your family.” Not that she wanted to make things awkward for Walker. He was such a great guy. Just not her great guy.

“It’s good. It would’ve been … hard.”

“On Walker?” she got brave enough to ask.

He nodded and didn’t seem surprised by the question. He thumped his closed fist against the side of his leg, his jaw tight. How could she ask if he wanted her for himself or if he was simply being the noble sheriff and ready to hand her over to Walker?

“Would you like to watch a movie?” he asked.

She blinked at him. No. She didn’t want to sit through a movie; she wanted to talk things out with him. To have him kiss her and hold her because he wanted to, not to prove something to Dr. Hampshire or her nursing friends.

“Sure,” she said, then cussed herself for being a wimp.

He gestured toward the living area. They settled into his wraparound leather couch. He gave his house some commands. The lights dimmed and a projector screen rose out of the floor in front of the fireplace.

“That’s amazing,” she said.

“Thanks. Rhett thought of it since my ceilings are high and we didn’t want to waste wall space with a screen.”

“I love all the windows in your house.” She loved his house.

“Me too.” He angled toward her and their arms brushed. “What are you in the mood for? Comedy, drama, suspense, romance …” He turned away and grabbed a remote off the coffee table. Clicking it on, he said, “I have a bundle with Netflix, Peacock, and Apple TV Plus.”

“Do you watch a lot of movies?” Her mind was caught on him offering ‘romance’. Yes, please.

He shrugged. “Usually too busy, but if I’m home alone and don’t have anything to read, I’ll find a movie. I’m not much into TV series.”

“Neither am I.” She didn’t like the thought of him home, all alone, without her. “How about a romantic comedy?”

His gaze became a little deeper. With the low lights on, the setting was prime for romance. “Do you have a favorite?”

“Have you seen Hitch with Will Smith, Kevin James, and Eva Mendes?”

“Ah, yes. A classic for sure.” He grinned and pushed some buttons, typing in Hitch and the movie came up. He pushed play and settled back against the couch.

Lily eased back as well, their arms brushing.

“You can push this button.” He reached down between the cushions, his arm brushing her knee and shooting sparks through her leg. “And your chair will recline.” He held the button, and her footrest came up as the back cushion reclined.

“Oh?” She reached down on the pretext of finding the button. Their hands brushed and then their fingers tangled together.

Clint’s eyes were a smoky blue in the soft lighting.

He lifted their joined hands and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. Lily’s breath shortened. Then he released her hand, and she felt a huge letdown. He pushed a button on the side of his cushion and his seat reclined too. Then he slid his left hand against her right hand. Their palms aligned and then their fingers. He threaded their fingers together and rested them on his leg.

Lily had difficulty breathing as she leaned back into the comfortable leather couch and tried to focus on the movie. Clint’s hand around hers and the slight movement of his thumb across the back of her hand commanded all her attention.

She’d held hands with Miles more times than she could count. It had never felt like this, even as giddy seventeen- and eighteen-year-olds.

As the movie progressed, she hoped and prayed he’d make a move. He didn’t. It was almost the last scene and Will Smith had just told Eva Mendes that she hadn’t hurt him and that he never went past a certain point in a relationship. Of course the viewer knew his heart had been broken years before and he was scared. Was that Clint’s issue? Sheryl Dracon had broken his heart in two and he was afraid to get in another relationship?

She was scared too—scared that he was only with her because of duty, scared he would reject her. But she had to be brave, make a move, and see if he reciprocated. Nerves twisted her stomach as she pulled her hand free from his grasp.

He turned toward her with a questioning glance.

Lily held eye contact and ran her hand up his arm, over the smooth muscles of his bicep, and to his well-formed shoulders. He swallowed and studied her.

She cupped the back of his neck with her hand, twisting toward him and resting her other hand on his chest. He pulled in a quick breath, his gaze full of her. She arched up and pressed her lips to his.

Clint hesitated for a fraction of a second.

Fear filled her. She’d been too bold. He’d only kissed her in public. He was going to reject her, tell her she should date Walker, tell her he wasn’t healed from Sheryl, tell her he was only doing all this pretending because he was the mighty sheriff.

Then Clint’s mouth moved against hers. He turned toward her, and all the fears vanished. Light and joy filled the room as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her thoroughly. Very, very thoroughly.

Time passed. Maybe. She was in a cloud of happiness that nothing or nobody could touch.

Clint drew back slightly and gave her an irresistible smile. “The movie’s over.”

“Oh.” She registered the music playing and the credits. She didn’t care about the movie. She could kiss him all night.

He drew her close but didn’t kiss her again, simply held her.

“Clint,” she whispered against his cheek, brave because of the wonderful minutes their lips had been joined and they’d been swept away together. It had to mean something to him. She’d initiated but he’d reciprocated. Oh, how he’d reciprocated. That kiss had been off the charts and only for them, not for any crowd or protection purposes.

“Yeah?” he asked, his voice husky and deep.

“Does all of this mean … you’re interested in me?”

“ Interested in you?” He straightened and eased back enough to see her face more clearly. “Lily, if you can’t tell that I’m interested in you, I’m a bigger failure at romance than even I realized.”

“You’re not a failure …” He was interested, but still hadn’t outright declared how he felt about her.

He arched a brow. “I’m thirty-two. I’ve dated seriously and gotten engaged to exactly one woman, and she was a backstabbing liar. Pretty much a failure.”

“Sheryl hurt you?”

“It was deep.”

“I’m sorry.” He’d been hurt deeply. He must’ve loved Sheryl deeply. Would he ever come to love Lily like that?

“It’s life, right? Did Miles hurt you?”

She shook her head. “It was mutual. We grew apart over the years.” How to tell him she’d always been interested in him?

“That’s good to hear.” He paused, then shook his head. “We’d better get some rest. I’ve got a busy day of sitting in the hospital parking lot tomorrow, but you have to be in top form for your moms and babies.” He smiled and stood, offering her a hand.

Lily took it and let him pull her to her feet, but she was far from done with this conversation. How many times had she backed down from conflict—not demanding her supervisor do something about Dr. Hampshire, not telling Dr. Hampshire off, not telling her family the mess she was in? She wasn’t the type to open up or ask for help; she handled things quietly and on her own.

But now she had to be vulnerable and brave, not back down.

“We need to talk about us,” she said firmly.

Clint’s brow furrowed. He released her hand and folded his arms across his chest. He looked closed off, impenetrable, the way the ‘hot Sheriff Clint Coleville’ had often looked over the years. Not the way her Clint looked. If he said, You … me … it’s a no, she would break in two.

“I …” He rubbed at his jaw. “Let’s talk after you’re safe and this op is done. I don’t want you to feel coerced or like you don’t have a choice in who you date.”

“Excuse me? I want to date you.”

Clint’s face and demeanor softened a bit, but then he shook his head. “You’ve only ever dated Miles. Maybe you need to let yourself explore some options before you decide who you want to date.”

“What in the world are you talking about?” she exploded, the words releasing faster than her fear of him rejecting her could call them back. “You are more closed off than Hitch. Sheryl hurt you so badly that you’ll never move past it? Never love again?”

“She did hurt me, but I want to move past that.” He thumped his closed fist against his leg. “I have to do what’s right, and I have to stand by my word to my brother. I think you should give him a chance once we catch the perp and you go back to your life.”

“Walker?”

He nodded tightly. “He’s had a thing for you for years. I told him I’d let him have his chance with you.”

“Excuse me?” Now she was even more upset. She’d heard him acquiesce her to Walker the other night and he must’ve reaffirmed his commitment to let Walker date her after church today. “You might be the mighty sheriff, but you don’t get to decide who I date.”

He studied her. She’d never seen his blue eyes so conflicted.

“If this”—she pointed to the couch, indicating their kissing session, and then to herself and to him—“meant nothing to you and you can just turn me over to your little brother to date, to hold, to kiss …”

His jaw and mouth tightened. He continued thumping his fist against his leg, but he didn’t say anything.

“Argh!” Lily threw her hands in the air, whirled, and stormed through the main level and up the stairs.

Clint came after her. She could feel him close behind her, but she didn’t stop. She flung her bedroom door open. Clint caught her around the waist, spun her, and pressed her against the wall. Her breath shortened and fire filled her at the depth of longing in his blue eyes.

“If I told you that I can’t stand the thought of you in another man’s arms, would you feel better?”

“Yes,” she shot back at him.

He leaned in close and growled against her lips, “Well, feel better.”

Their breath intermingled and his words made her stomach flip flop. She’d never heard anything so passionate and beautiful. Her anger disappeared, but she wasn’t certain if they were going to fight or kiss some more.

“Lily …” He softly brushed his lips over hers. “I’m gone over you, sweetheart.”

Lily sighed and arched up. He pinned her against the wall and made her mouth sing with warm, passionate kisses.

He drew back, pulling in fast breaths, and groaned. “Lily … I can’t do this to Walker.”

She blinked up at him. They were back to Walker?

Clint gently trailed his fingertips across her cheek and studied her face like it was a priceless work of art.

She captured his hand with hers. “Clint. Walker will understand.”

He pushed out a heavy breath and stepped back, releasing her completely. She leaned against the wall for support, weak and yearning for him.

“I gave him my word. Please. Just … give him a chance after we find the perp and you’re back to normal life. Then if you still want to date me, we can figure us out.” He shook his head and hit his fist against his leg.

She could tell the words made him miserable. She was miserable but also angry.

“I don’t want you to break your word to your brother, but if I’m not worth telling him how you feel and figuring things out with him, don’t bother calling me when this is all done.”

She whirled into the room and slammed the door before he could say anything.

Tears streaked down her face. She was head over heels in love with Clint, and he wanted her to let Walker have a chance to pursue her. She understood giving your word, but she obviously wasn’t special enough for him to stand up and tell his brother he loved her and resolve that issue.

The tears came faster as she realized what he’d said earlier. He’d loved Sheryl so much and the awful woman had broken him.

He would never love Lily like that.