Chapter 1

T urns out that eternal damnation is really boring. I have no idea how long I've been here for, it could've been hours, or it could have been days for all I know. Glancing down at my watch, I roll my eyes as I see it has stopped working, typical. Nothing is ever easy.

I look around again at the mostly empty landscape I'm stuck in, the forest at my back is the only thing to be seen. Everywhere I look, a grey hazy fog fills the air, covering the land around me, obscuring my view of the forest, allowing me to see no farther than the tree line. I stand at the fringe of the forest and turn to look at the trees towering over me, their dark gnarled branches making the whole place look creepy. Coupled with the fog, it isn't exactly welcoming. Behind me is a vast empty grey space, where nothing ever seems to move or change.

I walk along the edges of the trees again, the fog rolling against my skin and making small eddies as I move. I haven't ventured into the forest, and I don't think that I will just yet. It makes me feel uneasy, and a place deep within me is warning me not to venture in too far. Turning away, I take up my place back in the vast void of nothingness, dropping to the ground and laying on my back, staring up at the equally grey sky .

I wonder how I ended up here. I know that Shadowborn appear here when they die, but I don't feel dead. However, I must be if I'm here, in the Shadow Dimension, or Shadow Realm, as it's known. A place where bad Shadowborn like myself end up if we don't learn to control our powers. It's not a very well-known fact that Shadowborn fight against our nature on a daily basis, and if we're not strong enough, we're consumed by that power and our souls get called back.

We're a rare breed, with the ability to make our bodies become shadow, blending in wherever darkness exists. Historically, we have been used as assassins, which is why we often don't live past childhood, as we're killed off. Or, if we're untrained, we end up being pulled back to the Shadow Realm. I don't know much about Shadow Law, but I was told that when we're born, our souls come from Shadow, which is what gives us our abilities. Some say that the Shadow Realm reclaims our souls when we die.

I've been running from my powers my whole life. My old pack, the Shadow Pack, was cruel and tried to beat me into submission, but I managed to endure, escaping to America when I was eighteen. Recently, a local pack I'd been staying with was attacked, and I used my powers to save the men that I'm close to. I knew I was toeing a line, using too much power after keeping it suppressed for so long, but I was desperate. If I had to do it again, for them, I would.

But I have to say, I hadn't expected death to be like this—an unending nothingness. As I glance up into the bleak sky, I wonder how the guys are getting on. I have a lot of time for reflection here, and loneliness has started to set in, which surprises me.

I've always found comfort in my own company and have lived as a lone wolf for the last six years, until Alex from Moon River Pack marched into my life. I needed protection, no matter how much I proclaimed otherwise, and they needed a new nurse.

The pack overwhelmed me after so many years of avoiding them, but they were welcoming and they all seemed to thrive off each other's company, making it difficult not to enjoy spending time with them. I guess you never know what you're missing until you have it. But now, it's been taken away. I sigh, running my hands through my hair.

Tori, my best friend, was one of two people that I considered family before all this happened. She adopted me as hers when I arrived in the US from England, back when I fled my old pack. I'm not the only one with a dark past, and we bonded, became each other's family, not needing anyone else. Until I met the guys that is. I'm still not sure what it is I feel for them, but they've forced a way into my heart, whether I like it or not.

A stirring in the distance rouses me from my musing, my heightened senses on alert. To my right, the grey fog is moving and the area is brighter, like it's creating a pathway. Well, this is different. Standing up, I hesitantly walk towards it, I have no idea what is happening or if I should be following this unknown ‘path.' Aren't you supposed to avoid walking into the light? What do I do?

Closing my eyes, I try to focus on my wolf and the power that resides within me, my instincts have never let me down so far. My problem is, I often don't listen to those instincts. My wolf has been very quiet since I've been here, and I find that I miss her presence. It's like missing a part of yourself. I hadn't realised how much a part of me she was. I've always had a love-hate relationship with my wolf, like a sibling who's annoying as hell but one you couldn't live without. I can still feel her, but it's like our bond is muted. I open my eyes again and watch the swirling, misty path. My instincts are telling me to follow it, and for once, I decide to listen. I've already lost everything, what's the worst that can happen? I stand up and start walking slowly towards the light. A strange feeling comes over me the farther I walk, like opposing forces—one pulling me towards the light, and the other holding me back. Indecision wars in me, do I stay or keep going?

Determination fills me, and I push forward, following the tugging sensation. The light is so bright, I have to close my eyes as it becomes blinding. I start to hear voices, but they're muffled, so I can't make out what they are saying. The light is still too bright for me to look around, but the voices are getting louder, until suddenly, I know who's speaking.

"Why hasn't she woken up yet?" Killian's angry voice makes my eyes shoot open.

I'm back? My eyes flash around the room, my heart filling with an emotion I can't place as I see all of my men in my bedroom at Moon River Pack. I start to cry out, my emotions making it difficult for me to express my feelings in words, and I go to step forward when I notice a figure in my bed.

I stop in my tracks. It's not just any figure. It's me.

I peer around the room again, dread filling me before I stare back down at myself. I look like I'm in my shadow form, so while no one else can see me, I'm still able to see my body, some weird quirk of being a Shadowborn. I try to take a step towards my form in the bed and the guys, when something brings me to an abrupt stop. Frowning, I glance around and see that I'm standing in shadow against the back wall of the room, and a sinking suspicion fills me. This suspicion is confirmed when I try to take a step directly into the light, and I feel like I've walked into a wall. I'm trapped in the shadows.

I gaze over at my prone form again, horror filling me as I see my wasted body. My skin is pale and I've lost weight, looking like I've been unwell for a long period of time. This has never happened before, when a Shadowborn uses their shadow form, their whole body turns to shadow without a trace, like they were never there. Yet my body is lying there, telling a different story.

"We don't know, Kill, but you getting angry and smashing things is not going to help." Alex's voice stops me from staring at my body and has me looking around the room again.

Killian is pacing the room, and his long silvery blond hair is a mess, like he's run his hands through it multiple times. His usually clean-shaven jaw is covered in stubble, and he looks like his wolf is about to jump out of his skin. I can feel his alpha power from here. He bares his teeth at Alex in a snarl, but it lacks the usual harshness that I'm used to associating with Killian. He appears genuinely worried.

Movement next to the bed has me turning my gaze to the other guys. Garett is sitting up by my head and is brushing my hair gently, my usually glossy golden-brown locks looking dull and limp in his large hands.

"We need to stay calm, shouting is not going to help Ari. If you want to fight, take it out of the room," my bear shifter says, his voice quiet and gentle, despite his words, his eyes never leaving my still form.

I shouldn't be surprised that Garett is here, since he's always had my best interests at heart and has been my protector since I arrived in this country. He was the only other person besides Tori that I considered family before the pack barrelled into my life. But as a bear surrounded by a wolf pack, he must be feeling outnumbered here.

On the other side of my body, holding my limp hand, is Seb. My heart breaks a little at his broken expression as he gazes down at me. He's smaller than the other guys in the room and is physically less powerful than them, but his happiness is what draws you to him. Not to mention his model worthy looks and boyish charm. I almost don't recognise him.

"You're talking like she's ill and will get better. She has been like this for two weeks and is wasting away! Her soul is gone! She sacrificed herself for us, and now she's gone !" Killian's words are harsh and get louder as his pacing becomes more erratic, his voice breaking on his last word.

This seems to trigger something in Seb, and my gentle wolf does something I never thought he would. He pushes up from his place at my side so fast that his chair falls back with a bang. Killian stops his pacing and turns to look at Seb with a look of shock, not from the sudden loud noise, but the burst of power that's coming from him.

"Do not talk about her that way. She will be back." Seb's voice is low, but laced with a power that I've never felt before.

Despite his show of power, Seb has always been one of the lower-level wolves within the pack…or so I thought.

There's a hierarchical system within most shifter communities, with an alpha, beta, and gamma at the top. All shifters are born with a certain amount of power, and someone may be born with alpha power but never actually become an alpha. Alex is an example of this, being in the position of beta but possessing bucketloads of alpha power. You can't change your level of power, you're stuck with what you're born with. However, the pulsing waves of power coming off Seb are new. The powers coming off of him are the strength of a beta, which shouldn't be possible. The guys share a look of concern as Seb's power fades, and he turns to look at my prone form again, returning to my side, holding my hand once more.

I watch the four of them, surprised that they're all in the same room and not tearing into each other. Alex pushes away from the wall where he'd been leaning to walk closer to Killian.

"Killian, you mentioned before that you'd been trained by your previous alpha about Shadowborn, did they mention anything about this?" Alex probes. I can tell he wants to demand the answers, but in the mood Killian's in, that would be a bad idea.

"Don't you think I would have said something already?" he retorts with a slight snarl, and his pacing picks up speed as he runs his hands through his long hair.

Alex, to his credit, doesn't rise to the comment as many alpha level wolves would.

"Tell us what you know," he responds calmly, although I can tell from the slight tick in his eye that Killian's behaviour is bothering him.

"Shadowborn come from shadow. They have the ability to become shadow, but it comes with a cost. If they are well-trained and strong-willed, they can control the shadow, if not, it controls them . We all know that Ari hated her abilities and refused to use them," Killian explains, and a hush falls over the room as they take in what he's implying.

"The stronger the Shadowborn, the worse the potential consequences, which is why it's essential they're well-trained. I assumed Ari was weak because I never saw her use her powers, until the night of the rescue." Killian stops pacing and leans against a wall, sliding down it until he's sitting on the ground, staring up at my body.

Garett lifts his gaze from my face to look across at Killian, his hand still playing with my hair.

"I've never seen anything like it before. One minute, she was there, and then she was gone. In that moment, she was strong. She didn't look like the shadow was controlling her. It was only after that asshole, Black, was dead that it happened." He looks down at me as his voice quiets and a sorrow fills his eyes. "She looked scared, but like she knew what was going to happen. Like she was accepting what was happening. Then she was gone," Garett chokes out.

The urge to go to Garett and wrap my arms around him is so strong, it's like a physical pain within me, and the sorrow and anguish in his voice is tearing at me. I try to step forward, fuck the Shadow Realm and its claims over me! I push against my invisible bonds and try to force my way farther into the room. Pain rips through my body, and I'm thrown back into the darkened corner with a cry.

Panting from the effort and with pain zipping through me, I glance back up at the guys. All of them are the same, except for Killian, who's looking into my corner with a confused expression on his face and his hand rubbing at his chest as if it hurts. I freeze, does he know I'm here? Shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts, he sighs, running a hand over his handsome features. The scar down the side of his face looks stark in this light, and his severe frown doesn't help with the rough warrior look he has going on.

"From what I was told, weak Shadowborn who can't control their powers, or those who use too much, can get consumed by them. I saw it once, but their body went with them, they were enveloped by the shadows and they never returned." Killian pauses, his face twisting into a pained expression before he continues. "Which is why I don't understand why her body is still here."

I push up from where I'm curled up on the floor. Fuck this. It's time for them to know I'm still here, haunting their asses. I lean forward, growling as the pain starts spreading through my body, tingling at first before becoming blinding as I push harder against my shadowy cage. My wolf shifts inside me for the first time since I was taken by the shadows, and I urge her to help me. With her strength, I'm able to take a step before I feel shadowy tendrils start to wrap around me and tug at my body, trying to pull me back to the Shadow Realm. I shout in frustration and throw everything I have into staying, but I can feel that it's not enough.

"No! I'm still here! Help me!" is my last desperate cry before, with an almighty tug, I'm pulled away once again from the guys I call family.

Ari's usually beautiful face is twisted into a painful grimace.

Shadows twist up her arms and legs, claiming her like a controlling partner, pulling her back into the darkness. I can feel her pain, her panic and frustration as she tries to get away from the inevitable.

I watch in horror, unable to do anything, as she fights for the upper hand and is beaten.

The last thing I hear is her voice.

"No! I'm still here! Help me!"

My breath comes in pants, and my body is stiff from lying on the floor. The vision plays over in my head again.

I push up from the ground with shaky legs and run my hand though my hair. These visions have been coming more and more frequently. This is all I can think to call them—visions. Something is going on, but I can't figure it out.

I need to speak to a witch. They aren't very forthcoming to those who aren't their kind, but luckily, I happen to know one. Plan made, I release a breath I didn't know I was holding.

Ari is alive, but trapped.

I have to help her.