Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Zurielle

Idon’t sleep.

I can’t stop thinking about how Ursa and Alaric must have felt when they realized I was gone, how much I hurt them. If I could have left a note… But doing anything except walking away was just asking for Ursa and Alaric to try and follow. To put themselves in danger for me. I couldn’t risk it. I need them safe, and this was the only way to guarantee it.

I pace around my room. It’s been mine since birth. It never felt so claustrophobic as it does now. The walls are too close, the weight of my father’s will pressing down on me despite not having seen him yet. My sisters tried to cluster when we arrived back in Olympus, but I can’t deal with them on top of my own guilt.

My resolve, on the other hand, remains strong. I will do anything to save those I love. Anything.

Another circle paced around the room does nothing to quell the restless feeling in my chest. The sun has long since risen. Father will have already eaten breakfast and convened with his head of security to go over the plan for the day. He’ll know I’m back. The fact that he hasn’t summoned me to him is a power play, a punishment.

I’m tired of waiting on the whims of others.

I dress carefully, pulling out a pair of tailored slacks and a green blouse. Clothing is as intentional as anything, and these are items that I’ve worn maybe once or twice, preferring dresses. There’s nothing wrong with dresses, but I need every weapon in my arsenal for what comes next. I style my hair into a sleek ponytail and apply my makeup with a stronger hand than I normally would. When I pick my lipstick, it’s a bright red that makes me think of Ursa.

The thought brings a pang in my chest. What must she think of me now? No doubt that I betrayed her, that I left with no intention of returning. If things work out like I hope and I’m able to travel back to Carver City… Will she even have me? She’s a woman with many walls and just as many spikes, though they’re clothed in sweetness. It took a lot for her to open up to me, to let me in, and she’ll see this as a betrayal of the highest order.

And Alaric? He finally showed me his true self, told me he loved me, and I immediately turned around and disappeared back to Olympus. Impossible to see that as anything other than a slap in the face, especially considering they’re unlikely to know what my sisters said to me. He won’t see this as me trying to protect them. No, he’ll view this as much of a betrayal as Ursa will.

I close my eyes and focus on steadying my breathing. Even if neither of them ever forgives me, they’ll be safe from my father.

But my time of going with the flow in order not to make waves is over.

I open my eyes and place my mother’s necklace around my neck. Its heavy weight feels like the last bit of armor sliding into place. I don’t know what she’d think of this entire situation, but I feel stronger just wearing it.

I take one last fortifying breath and stride out of my room, my heels clicking on the tile floors. As expected, I find my father in his office; another fifteen minutes and I’d have missed him as he headed out to the shipyards.

He looks older than the last time I saw him, which seems absurd. It’s been a little more than a week. People don’t age so quickly. But I could swear there’s more silver in his red hair and more lines around his gray eyes. He’s a large man, nearly as tall as me even while sitting down, and this is the first time in my life that I’ve really acknowledged how strength hasn’t only been used to protect our family.

It’s been used to hurt people.

It’s been used to keep me and my sisters caged. To control us.

I plant my feet and try to steel my spine. This won’t be easy. “Father.”

He doesn’t look up from his computer. “I am not ready to see your traitorous face, Zurielle.”

I embrace the flare of anger. It gives me the strength to ignore the anger in his voice and shut the door. “I don’t care what you want.”

“You made the abundantly clear when you ran off to Carver City and fucked my enemies.” He sits back and levels a look at me. Faced with the same expression, a younger me would have fled the room until he calmed down. A cowardly me. My father looks me over, something brittle in his gaze. “I’ll admit I didn’t expect to see you again whole. The Sea Witch doesn’t often leave her victims so intact.”

“She has a name.” I swallow hard. “And I’m not Ursa’s victim.”

“How would you know? She’s manipulative and vindictive.” He sighs and shakes his head. “You’re an innocent, Zurielle. She had no business laying hands on you.”

I was prepared for his anger. I was not prepared for him to try to shove me right back into my old self the same way my sisters did. I reach up and grip my necklace, letting the edges of the jewels press hard against my palm. I’m so angry, it leaves me breathless. “She did a whole lot more than lay hands on me.”

His jaw tightens. “That’s enough.”

“No, it’s not.” I glare. “When are you going to admit that I am more than capable of thinking for myself?”

“When you prove that you can make decisions like a fucking adult!” He slams his hands on the desk and shoots to his feet. “I have driven myself crazy with worry about you, and you acted like a selfish little brat.”

“You lied to me.” I take a step forward, refusing to back down in the face of his anger. “You have hurt just as many people as she has. Don’t act like it’s not the truth.”

“Anything I’ve done, I’ve done for this family.”

I laugh. “That’s rich. It’s noble when you do it, but when she does it, it’s evil. You keep pretending like she betrayed you, but you are the one who drove her out of Olympus so you could play second-in-command to Poseidon without competition. You are a hypocrite.”

His face darkens to a deep red color. “Did you come home to lob insults at me? How mature. If you’re going to act like a child, you can go to your fucking room like a child.”

He’s not going to listen to me. He’s acting like he has every other time one of us has done something he doesn’t like. My father becomes a rage-filled steamroller and annihilates any form of resistance. The impulse to retreat nearly sends me fleeing the room. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to fight, to spit these hateful words at each other.

But if I don’t stand up to him now, I’ll never get a chance to do it again.

“No.” I take a breath.

“What the hell did you just say to me?”

“No,” I repeat. “I am not a child. I am not a rebellious teenager. I’m sure as hell not a princess locked in a tower. You are my father, but I’m no longer accepting you as my jailer.”

He laughs, harsh and cruel. “Now I know she’s put words in your mouth. I’m not your jailer. I’m your father. I only want what’s best for you, and if you can’t see that, you’re not ready to have this conversation.”

It would be so easy to slip back into that old skin, to stop fighting. I have twenty-three years of learned behavior, all that experience clamoring for me to stop arguing and leave the room until he’s less angry. Instead, I plant my feet and straighten my spine. “I am an adult and you keep me locked up in this house, unable to go anywhere without an armed guard, unable to talk to anyone who isn’t approved by you. You keep me from getting a job, from having access to my own money. From everything. Tell me what that is if not a jailer?”

“I—”

But I’m not interested in whatever he’s about to yell at me. I keep going. “I only came home in order to tell you that I’m done. You have to let me go.”

He blinks. “What?”

“You have to let me go,” I repeat. “Do you think that I’ve learned nothing from you? Do you really think that I’m so much of a fool that I don’t know my own heart?”

He leans back a little. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I’m moving out.” I measure each word carefully, all too aware that rushing through this will give him further ammunition not to take me seriously. To say that I’m too emotional to be rational right now. “I am starting my own life and making my own decisions while doing it.” I watch him closely. “I would like you to be a part of it, but if you can’t support me, then you won’t be welcome in my new home.”

“Your new home,” he echoes. Father sinks back into his seat, all the red rushing from his face and leaving him pale. “You’re going back to her.”

“You will stop any plans to take your people to Carver City.”

“Or what?”

I hoped it wouldn’t come to this, but I’ll do what I have to. I can’t afford to waver right now. I only have one chance to make this stick, to protect the people I love and ensure my freedom. “Or I’ll tell Poseidon that you’re utilizing his resources to attack another city and potentially drag all of Olympus into a war. Because of your pride. Because you don’t trust your daughter to make her own way.”

He pauses for a long moment, and finally says, “What makes you think he’ll care?”

“I’m sure he can do basic math. We have a line of supplies that go straight into Carver City for what I imagine is a large amount of revenue. A war would cut that off, in addition to costing both sides a fortune in supplies and lives lost.”

Something like pride flickers through his eyes. “It would seem you have me over a barrel.”

“Father… Daddy…” I sigh. “I love you. I’ve been blind to your faults for too long and let you keep me in this cage because of that love. It’s over now. Either let me fly or get out of my way.”

He surprises me by chuckling. “You’re so much like your mother.”

My chest pangs, but I refuse to soften. Not until I have his agreement. “Give me your word that no harm comes to anyone in Carver City.”

“Including the Sea Witch.”

“Including the Sea Witch,” I confirm.

“If she harms you…”

“She won’t.” I don’t know if I’m lying or not. If she turns away from me when I go back to Carver City… Well, I don’t know what happens next. I’ve sacrificed the money earned for the auction. I trust Hercules’s promise that Alaric’s debt remains paid, but the extra money no longer belongs to me. I’ll be in a city I barely know, with no money or resources of my own. But at least I’ll be free.

I have to risk it.

I have to try.

My father is silent for so long, I have to quell the urge to fidget. Finally, he sighs. “There will be no turning you from this, will there?”

“No.”

“If I lock you in your room, you won’t be able to go running to Poseidon with stories.” He almost sounds like he’s musing. “I could send a team of my best men and finally remove the blight of the Sea Witch from my life.”

My chest tries to close in on itself, but I refuse to quake. “If you do that, I’ll never forgive you. I’ll spend the rest of my life doing whatever it takes to bring you down and make you pay for it.”

He nods as if he expects no less. “She’s been my enemy for a very long time, Zurielle. Decades.”

“Is your revenge worth more than my happiness?” I stare at him, willing him to see reason. “Is your hate for her greater than your love for me?”

My father looks at me like he’s never seen me before. “She makes you happy.”

“Yes.” I hesitate. “She will if we’re given half a chance to see what we might become.”

This time, when Father sighs, he sounds defeated. “So be it. I give you my word. With the understanding that if she harms you, I will burn that entire city to the ground, Poseidon’s disapproval or no.” His lips pull up into a half smile. “I guess you really have grown up.”

No point in reminding him that I fucked Alaric while he was on the phone with Ursa. Or in pointing out how beyond out of line his actions have been since the beginning. Not with this fledgling peace blossoming before my eyes, not when I am nearly free. “I love you, Daddy.”

“I love you, too.” He scrubs a hand over his face. “I’ve got to get to work. Be careful.”

Careful is the last thing I’m going to be. Not when my heart is beating so hard, I feel a little light-headed. This worked. I can’t believe this worked. “I promise.”

He rises and walks around the desk to pull me into a hug. “Call me when you get there so I know you’re safe.”

“Okay.” It’s the very least I can do, a concession in response to a larger concession.

He walks out of his office without another word.

It worked. I can barely believe it. I walk back to my room in a haze. I have to pack, but as I look around, the handful of things I can’t live without are already in Carver City. I hear footsteps behind me and turn to see Aya. She looks at me and looks at my room. “You’re leaving again, aren’t you?”

There’s no point in denying it. “Yes.”

Aya nods as if it’s nothing more than she expected. “You care about her, don’t you? The Sea Witch.”

“Her name is Ursa.” I take a deep breath. “I love her. I love both of them.”

Aya’s brows rise. “Why didn’t you say something last night? Tell us that you wanted to stay?”

“Would you have listened?”

She opens her mouth but seems to reconsider. “I don’t know. Being in that place…” She gives a delicate shudder. “It feels like another world. Having you stand here and tell me with clear eyes that you’re in love with her—with them—feels more concrete.” She shakes her head. “I’m sorry. We should have paid better attention.”

“Don’t be sorry.” I cross to her and give her a quick hug. “I had to come back or Father would have done something unforgivable. You brought me that news, and that’s important.”

She gives me a trembling smile. “Will you come back to visit?”

No. I don’t think so. At least not anytime soon. “Maybe. But you’re more than welcome to visit whenever you want.” I don’t know how it will work, or if I should be making promises like this, but I won’t take it back.

“Okay.” This time, her smile is far firmer. “I’m happy for you. Truly.”

“Thank you.” I hitch a breath. “I have to go.”

“Be safe.”

“I will. I promise.” So many promises.

I hope I’m not going to make a liar of myself.