Chapter 21

CHAPTER 21

Holden

“What the fuck, Catalano?” Dylan, our bass player, said. “You got an STD or something?”

I looked up from breaking down my drum set. “What the hell are you talking about?”

He motioned to the woman who’d just stopped over to tell me how much she’d enjoyed the show…and asked if she could buy me a drink.

“Oh, that. Not interested.”

“Really?” Monroe chimed in. “She looks right up your alley. Long hair, big tits, nice ass. Not to mention those plump lips look like they would make some really nice dick pillows for your head.”

I chuckled but shook my other head. “I only have one type these days, boys—a certain brainiac blonde who’s back home waiting for my return.”

Dylan raised a brow before glancing around to the other guys. “I got fifty he doesn’t make two weeks.”

“A hundred says he doesn’t make it out of Oregon without at least a blowjob,” Kevin added, putting away his guitar.

Monroe pulled a wad of cash from his front pocket and twirled the microphone in his hand. He motioned to two women I hadn’t noticed, who were gazing my way and smiling. One sucked on the straw in her drink suggestively. “Oregon? I’m pretty sure those are identical twins. They were sitting in the front row. The one in red has a tongue ring. I got two hundred he doesn’t make the night.”

I shook my head as I dismantled the tension rod from the bass drum. “I’ll take every single one of your bets, you fools. Because the only thing I’m looking forward to taking to bed with me tonight, or any other night during this trip, is my iPad, so I can FaceTime with my girl.”

Dylan nodded. “It’s definitely gonorrhea.”

After we finished loading the van, the guys went back into the bar for drinks, but I decided to call it a night. I was all too familiar with the attention we got when we stuck around after playing, and I didn’t want to put myself in that situation. Not that there would be any temptation on my part—I was a blissfully satisfied man these days—but even hanging out with women I knew would be into fooling around seemed wrong. The guys could joke all they wanted, but I was living my best life getting to play on stage and then going back to my room to tell my girl all about the day. Which was exactly what I did.

“Oh my gosh. You need to put a shirt on.” Lala’s face came on the screen, and she smiled. “It’s unfair that I should have to look at that and then go to bed alone.”

I was sitting with my back against the headboard, wearing only boxer briefs. Locking my hands together behind my head, I made sure to flex my biceps. “Are you saying you like what you see, sweetheart?”

Lala sighed. “I wish I could lick what I see right now.”

I smiled. “How was your day?”

“Good. Busy. I went to one of the assisted-care centers I’m working with to check in on how everyone is doing.”

“Is it going well?”

She nodded. “I really love working with older people. They have so many stories to share. Mr. Wentz, one of the gentlemen in my study, has been married for fifty-seven years. He met his wife at three years old, when her family moved in next door to his in Chicago. They grew up as best friends, but by the time they were teenagers, they were madly in love. When his wife was sixteen, her father got transferred to Switzerland for work. They wanted to get married and stay together, but their parents wouldn’t allow it, and eventually they lost touch since she lived so far away. Eight years later, they were both engaged to be married to other people when they wound up on the same subway car in Manhattan. Mr. Wentz was there on a business trip for only that day, and Mrs. Wentz was there to visit her sick grandfather. According to Mr. Wentz, his heart started beating again on that train. That very night, he broke off his engagement and quit his job, since they wouldn’t let him extend his trip in New York. He said he wasn’t letting her out of his sight a second time.”

“Wow. Sounds like it was fate. It’s not as impressive as winning the girl from her fiancé by acting like a complete douchebag in a bar, but it’s a decent story.”

Lala laughed. “How was your show tonight? I didn’t expect to hear from you this early. What time did it end?”

I shrugged. “About a half hour ago, maybe. I took a shower before calling you.”

“I thought you guys usually had drinks after your shows?”

“We do. The guys stuck around, but I wasn’t in the mood for it. I wanted to come back and call you.”

She smiled. “I’m glad you did. I thought about you a lot today.”

“Yeah?”

“I was thinking maybe we could take a weekend trip after you’re home?”

“I’m game. Where to?”

“Up to the Hudson Valley. When we were kids, we went to a wedding at this place called Mohonk Mountain House. I think staying there is really expensive, so we can stay somewhere else nearby, but they have all these beautiful hiking trails and the most amazing views of the mountains. I thought it would be nice to go while the weather is still warm.”

“So you’ve been thinking about getting away just the two of us, huh?”

“Yeah, is that weird?”

The fact that she was thinking about doing things with me—going hiking and taking a road trip together—gave me hope. As much as I loved fucking her, I wanted more with Lala. And this was the first real sign that maybe she did, too. “No, it’s not weird at all. I’d love to go. I love the outdoors, and it gives me something to look forward to. I’ve only been gone four days, and I miss you already.”

Her face went soft. “I miss—”

Her cell phone started ringing. It must’ve been nearby, because for a second I thought it was mine. “Ummm… Hang on a minute. Okay, Holden? It’s my parents calling, and it’s pretty late here. I want to make sure nothing is wrong.”

“Yeah, of course. Go ahead.”

I watched as she swiped to answer. “Hello?”

I could only hear one side of the conversation, but I didn’t need to hear the other person. From the look on Lala’s face, I could tell the call was not good news.

“When? Is she okay? Where is she?”

Fuck. It’s her mother.

Lala put her hand over her mouth as she listened. “I’ll be there as soon as I can. Will you be at the hospital?”

Quiet.

“No, I want to come, Dad. It should be a pretty quick drive at this time. I’ll call you when I’m close.”

More quiet.

“Okay, bye.”

She swiped to hang up, and my heart was already racing.

“What happened?”

“My mom…” Her eyes filled with tears. “She had a heart attack, Holden.”

“Fuck. Is she okay?”

Lala got up and started walking with the iPad. She went into her bedroom and began to toss clothes into a bag. “My dad said she’s stable now, but they found a blockage. She was taken by ambulance, and they’re probably going to do surgery tomorrow.” She rubbed her forehead. “Thank God I didn’t have that wine I thought about earlier, or I might not be able to drive. I never gave any thought to what I would do in an emergency.”

“Don’t think about that now. One of the guys could always drive you, if you needed.”

“Holden, what happens if my mom…” She got choked up.

Fuck, I wished I was there to hold her, to go with her, to be by her side. “She’s going to be okay, sweetheart.”

“You can’t know that!”

I raked a hand through my hair. “She’s okay now, and she’s in a hospital where she’s going to get the help she needs. What hospital is she in?”

“Jefferson.”

“That’s a great hospital. It’s known for cardiac care. She’s in good hands.”

“I need to hang up.” She looked around the room and zipped up a duffle bag. “I’ve got to get on the road.”

“Maybe we should call one of the guys? I don’t want you driving in the dark while you’re upset.”

“No, I’m fine.”

I frowned. “Can you do me one favor before you go, at least?”

“What?”

“Sit down.”

“I can’t. I need to leave, Holden.”

“Just for one minute…I promise.”

She sighed, but sat. “What?”

“Take a deep breath.”

She took a small one.

I smiled. “A bigger one. Actually, close your eyes and give me three deep breaths.”

She didn’t look happy about it, but she nonetheless did what I asked. I watched as she closed her eyes and counted three deep breaths. When she opened, I smiled.

“Thank you. She’s going to be fine. Drive safe, okay?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. “Okay.”

“Call me after you get there. Or shoot me a text. Whatever is easier. Just let me know how Mrs. E is doing and that you arrived safely.”

She nodded. “I will. Bye.”

***

I didn’t sleep at all. Lala hadn’t called or texted. The drive from Manhattan to Philly shouldn’t have been more than two-and-a-half hours at the time she left, but four hours had gone by without a word. Every bad scenario played out in my head.

She had an accident.

Mrs. E had another heart attack and didn’t make it.

She and her father are too much of a mess to call anyone.

Fuck.I hated that I wasn’t with her. And as selfish and immature as it was, I also couldn’t help but worry about what would happen when she was in Philly again. Would she turn to Warren for comfort? Lala’s mother—a woman who’d been like a second mother to me for most of my life—was in the hospital with a serious medical condition, and I was so damn self-absorbed that I couldn’t stop thinking about Lala being near her ex. That made me feel like an even bigger piece of shit.

More hours went by. I tried to convince myself that maybe she’d fallen asleep on the chair next to her mom’s bed and everything was fine. But by 7 AM Philly time, I was pacing my hotel room and figured it was a somewhat okay time to call.

Her phone rang once and went straight to voicemail. I hated not reaching her, but left a message anyway.

“Hey, sweetheart. It’s about seven your time. I just wanted to check in and see how things were going. Just let me know when you get a chance.” I paused. “I’m thinking about you and your mom, and I’m sorry I’m not there with you.”

A half hour later, I had to start packing for our next stop. The band needed to get on the road this morning, and we were supposed to meet downstairs for the free breakfast before that. Just as I opened my hotel room door, my phone buzzed with an incoming text. I stopped to read it.

Lala: Sorry I haven’t called. Mom is stable, though she’s still in Afib—atrial fibrillation, where the heart beats irregularly. They don’t allow phones to be used in the ICU, so I had mine off. I haven’t wanted to leave the unit in case a doctor came by. Rounds finally just started. There’s a group of doctors going bed to bed, and they’re currently three beds away from us. Hopefully, they’ll get to us soon. I’ll try to call you after.

Holden: Okay. Good luck.

I didn’t hear from her while we had breakfast, loaded the SUV with all of our equipment, or for the first two-and-a-half hours into our drive. I tried my best not to be a pest, but eventually I sent another text.

Holden: Sorry. Just wanted to check in. Did you get to meet with the docs yet?

My phone rang a few minutes later. I was in the backseat with two guitar cases on the seat between me and Dylan, while Kevin was up front with Monroe, who was driving. I had zero privacy.

“Hello?”

“Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner with an update. It’s the first time I’ve left the ICU since I got here. I came outside to take a quick walk and get some fresh air.”

“No worries. I just wanted to see how your mom was doing. And how you’re holding up?”

She blew out an audible breath. “They took Mom into surgery a few minutes ago. They’re doing a bypass. The blockage couldn’t be cleared with angioplasty.”

“Shit, I’m sorry, babe. She’s young and strong, though. I’m sure she’ll do okay.”

“The doctors are optimistic, but I can’t help being terrified. And I could tell Mom was, too, before she went in.”

“Yeah, of course. It’s got to be scary.”

I heard a man’s voice in the distance. “Hey. How’s Jean doing?”

“Oh…hi, Warren. What are you doing here?”

My teeth gritted as I listened to their conversation.

“My mom heard from your parents’ neighbor, Irene Davis, that there was an ambulance at the house. She called me, and I called you, but your phone went to voicemail. I called Bill, and he filled me in.”

“My dad filled you in?”

“I spoke to him about a half hour ago.”

“Oh. He didn’t mention that you’d called.”

My jaw clenched so tight, I was surprised I didn’t crack a tooth. First of all, he was there, and I wasn’t. But also…Bill? Not Mr. Ellison, like I’d always called him. And I certainly didn’t have her father’s phone number. I realized all over again what Warren had been to her, what he’d been to her entire family.

“Are you on the phone?” Warren asked.

“Oh…shoot. Yes, I am. Excuse me a minute.”

She came back on the line. “Hey. Umm…Warren just showed up.”

“I heard.”

“Oh…okay.”

So many emotions hit me, and I didn’t know what to do with any of them. I guess I was quiet for a while.

“Are you still there?” Lala asked.

“Yeah, I’m here.”

She lowered her voice. “I’m sorry.”

I frowned, but had to suck it up for Lala’s sake. “Nothing to be sorry about, sweetheart. I’m glad someone is there for you. And I’ll let you go, so you can go back and be with your dad.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

The last thing she should be worrying about right now was me. “Of course. Call me later and let me know how everything goes. Okay?”

“Alright.”

“I hope everything goes smoothly.”

“Thanks.”

“Bye.”

Dylan eyed me when I hung up. I hadn’t told them what had gone down yet. “Everything okay?”

“My girlfriend’s mom had a heart attack last night. They just took her in for a bypass.”

“Shit. Sorry, man.” He was quiet for a moment, then cracked a small smile. “Girlfriend, huh? Don’t think I’ve ever heard you use that word.”

The funny thing is, I hadn’t even realized I’d said it. But deep down, that’s what Lala was to me…my girl. Unfortunately, I wasn’t sure if I was her guy…and she was currently with a man who I was certain still wanted her.