Chapter 2
TWO
RORY
As I lie in bed that night, unable to sleep, I think back to when my parents had called me yesterday afternoon, just before walking in on Zach, and how I was telling them all about the plans we had and how I was looking forward to bringing him home with me for Thanksgiving this year. My parents and my little sisters are about a two hour drive away in Breckinridge, so I always make it back for the holidays and I had planned on introducing them to Zach, finally. I can't believe I have to tell them that not only is he not coming but that he fucking cheated on me.
Not yet, though. I'm not ready to say anything to them yet.
I remember when Zach asked me to move in with him. Well, insisted is probably more like it, though I didn't see it that way at the time. I was nervous, but I'll admit I was flattered, too, at how he seemed to be so attached to me. I wasn't sure if it was what I wanted or not but he convinced me, telling me we'd have more time alone together, that it would help our relationship. That he missed me and wished I was around more. I missed out on a summer with my parents and little sisters after not seeing them for almost two months because Zach was so insistent that I come back and help him get moved into the new place. Told me if I really cared about him and our relationship like he did I would put him first and stop being so selfish. That he needed me.
Now that I have the scenario running through my head again along with the current set of events, I'm realizing just how manipulative he was, making me feel like if I didn't do what he wanted and something happened between us, it was my fault, or like I wasn't a good boyfriend because I wasn't spending enough time with him. Conversation after conversation fills my head with all the things he's said to me over the past four months and how much he changed after we moved in together.
His charm evaporated and he became more easily irritated by me and my quirks. He didn't compliment me all the time anymore, he didn't bring me food when I was studying, he didn't text me to say how much he missed me. But I once again assumed it was just me expecting too much, and I didn't want to say anything and come across as too clingy. The one time I did mention his mood he snapped at me. Told me he was allowed to have bad days. The next morning he'd apologized and told me he'd just been tired, that maybe it would help if I didn't go to Lucy's and hang out that night and we had time just the two of us. I ended up canceling plans with her to stay home with him. And he'd said some things while he was fucking me that night that had hurt my feelings so much I'd locked myself in the bathroom and cried afterwards.
It went on like that for months. Him telling me I was too high maintenance. Him criticizing me for something, generally something he had found endearing or at least tolerable before, only to have him tell me I was being too sensitive or too needy if I brought it up, or told him he had hurt me. He loved to remind me how much he put up with for me.
"Fuck," I say, as the memories bombard me. "I'm so fucking stupid." I'm sobbing again as I realize just how miserable I've been the last several months, trying to be better and do better for him, keeping my feelings to myself so I didn't upset him, trying to be the good boyfriend who doesn't cause problems or get on anyone's nerves.
Then I remember what Lucy said after I heard that audio clip. Don't listen to him, Rory, he's trying to get inside your head.
But it's too late. He's already inside my head and he's so fucking loud I don't know how I'll ever get him out.
"Okay, it's time to get out," Jackson says a week later, setting his laptop aside and hopping off the bed. He makes his way over to his closet and flings the doors wide. "Come on, get dressed." He looks over to where I'm sitting at his desk, attempting to do homework.
"I really need to write this paper," I tell him.
"No, you really need to get laid," he replies. I groan. "Come on, Rory, you've done nothing but mope around for days, and you have been staring at the screen for twenty minutes. Your head's not in it, so let's take a break. You are getting some action tonight."
I bite my lip. "I don't know. I'm not sure I'm up for going out." Though at least my test results came back negative, so that's a relief.
He sighs and walks over to me, resting his hand on my shoulder. "I know you aren't big on parties and crowds, and I respect that, but you need to let loose a little, hon. See that life can still go on even if you aren't in a relationship. Have some fun. You've been so down, and you know what they say, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else."
"I'm not exactly a catch, Jax," I say, and he narrows his eyes at me. "I don't know if you noticed this or not but Zach was my first everything. Guys weren't exactly knocking down my door before he came along."
"You did not just say that." He snaps his fingers from side to side. "Rory, baby, you are the cutest cutie to ever cute, you understand me? Just because Zach didn't know what he had in you doesn't mean every guy out there is a moron. Trust me, you are going to do just fine."
I can't help the small smile that forms on my face.
"You good?" he asks. I nod. "Fabulous, we'll only stay for an hour or so, and if you aren't feeling it we'll head home, okay?"
"Okay."
"Now, where are those jeans that make your ass look positively biteable?" He winks and I flush as he digs through my clothes. "Text Lucy and tell her to meet us at Raves in thirty minutes."
When we walk out the door twenty minutes later I'm freshly showered and dressed in my ass biting jeans and a blue button up with a red bow tie and gray suspenders.
When we reach the club I slide earplugs in my ears that block out the background noise, but still make it possible to hear the people around me. It helps me not get so overwhelmed by everything.
Lucy meets us outside and we walk into the club together. I see the colorful lights flashing over the dance floor and the sweaty bodies moving to the beat. The smell of alcohol and lemon fills the air as we make our way to a booth in the back. Lucy and I sit while Jackson gets us drinks.
Honestly, as much as I am not huge on crowds, this is nice, getting out with my friends, and I do enjoy dancing.
We finish our first round of drinks and then Lucy grabs both my and Jackson's hands and pulls us out into the throng of people on the dance floor. I sway my hips and raise my arms as I move to the music, surprised at how much I'm enjoying myself.
"Hey," Jackson says, moving closer to me as Lucy grinds up against a pretty girl nearby, both of them smiling, "looks like those jeans are doing the trick. I told you you wouldn't have any trouble."
I blink, and he motions with his chin towards the bar. When I turn my jaw nearly drops. There's no way that gorgeous guy is staring at me. He must be at least six foot two, with short dark hair and a body that tells me he definitely works out. He blushes and gives me a sexy smile, and a wave that's insanely cute, and I feel my cheeks heating. I bite my lip to keep from grinning from ear to ear as I wave back. Is this real?
"Hey, what's the matter?" Jackson asks when my smile disappears in an instant, replaced with a racing heart and sweat gathering on the back of my neck that has nothing to do with the lights and multitude of bodies around me. You know with how messed up you are you're lucky I ever gave you the time of day, let alone thought you were worth fucking . No one else is going to want you, Rory. You had it so good with me and you don't even know it.
I shake my head. "I can't. He's so hot. There's no way he wants me. I can't do this. Zach was right. I don't know why I'm here."
"Hey," Jackson grips my shoulders and turns me to face him. "Zach wasn't right about a damn thing. That guy wouldn't be staring at you if he wasn't interested. You're not picking out curtains. It's just a fuck, to get that asshole off your mind. Don't let him ruin it." He grips my chin and takes a deep breath and lets it out, and I follow.
"Good?" he asks. I'm still nervous, but I nod. I need to do this. I want to do this. God, he really is hot. Those broad shoulders and thick chest. Arms with muscles for days. The narrow waist and thick thighs.
I can't help doubting myself again, though, as I make my way over to the gorgeous guy, dressed in snug fit jeans and a white T-shirt that clings to his upper body, showing off said physique. There's no way he was really looking at me, right? Maybe the guy behind me? Maybe at Jackson? My best friend is insanely pretty. It was probably him and I am making an idiot out of myself.
God I shouldn't be doing this. But it was me he was waving at and it's definitely me he's looking at now.
I haven't had sex in two weeks and that's enough to make even me horny, and apparently more bold than usual, because I am not the type to approach gorgeous men in clubs. But maybe a mind blowing orgasm will help get me out of my funk and provide me with enough clarity that I can write my fucking paper.
I'm not interested in being fucked. It's something I did for Zach because he liked it but I just never enjoyed it very much. Blow jobs, though, I love those, both giving and receiving, and the thought of having this guy's dick in my mouth is making my mouth water and my cock twitch.
But why me? Out of all the guys in here, whom I am sure he could have his pick of, he was looking at me? The shrimpy little nerd? It doesn't make sense.
"Hi," I say, stopping in front of him.
He beams at me. "Hey, cutie. I like your bow-tie." His voice is vibrant and cheerful, and not really what I expected, but I find myself liking it. "Suspenders, too."
God it's like Zach all over again, the way he started flattering me endlessly. And look how well that turned out. But I'm not dating the guy, just getting off with him, hopefully. "Yeah, um, listen, I don't mean to be rude but I'm incredibly horny and I just broke up with my boyfriend and just need to unwind, if you're cool with that."
He grins at me. "Man, you don't mess around, do you, little dude?"
I flush, both at his words and the nickname. Little dude? Honestly, I've never been this bold before but if I don't grab the bull by the horns so to speak, I'm afraid I'll chicken out, and I really am horny.
He grabs my hand and pulls me around the corner and into the bathroom, not letting go until we're in the furthest stall from the door. He closes and locks it before turning back to me, and God, I want to climb him like a tree. Those muscles are something else, and his hazel eyes are heated when they lock on mine, like he really wants this. Wants me. I don't understand it but I would be foolish to analyze it too much.
"Can I kiss you?" he asks, his breathing picking up, and I notice the bulge in his tight jeans. God, he's big. I lick my lips and nod, and not a second later his lips are on mine. I have to stand on my tiptoes to kiss him, but fuck, it's worth it. His hands are so big they pretty much engulf my entire face as his warm, chapped lips slide over mine. I open for him the moment his tongue slides along my lower lip. God, he's a good kisser. I don't think Zach ever kissed me like this. He tastes like potato chips and lime and it's addicting.
He presses me against the wall and I gasp when I feel his rock hard cock against my stomach. He smells like toasted marshmallows and vanilla and it makes my cock twitch. "Can I blow you?" he asks, pulling away, his pupils blown wide. My heart pounds a little harder. I've always been a bit self conscious about the size of my dick. It's a little on the small side at only four and half inches, and Zach never failed to point that out, which just made it worse, but I want this. I need it, so hopefully if this guy is disappointed he'll keep it to himself.
"Yes," I reply, and he grins. Then he's kissing me again and I have to hold back a whimper as his large fingers skate through my curls. God, this is unlike anything I've ever felt before. Why is it so different with him? So much better?
I almost whimper again when his mouth leaves mine and then laugh a little when he looks at my suspenders like he isn't sure what to do with them. "These are adorable, but how do we get them off?" he asks.
I reach over and slide one of the straps off my shoulder, then the other, letting them fall to my sides. He flushes. "Oh, right. Thought I had to unhook them from your pants or something."
I grip his face and pull him back to me, smiling, because he's just too damn cute. I love that he's so flustered he couldn't figure out how to undress me. He lets me kiss him a few more times before he pulls away and sinks to his knees. Oh, God. My heart rate picks up again and sweat gathers on the back of my neck as he unzips my pants. I want this, I know I do, and he looks incredible on his knees in front of me. Fuck, if I'd wanted to hear my partner whining like a bitch when I fuck them I'd have gone to bed with a girl. You a fucking girl, Rory?
Don't let him in your head , I tell myself. Don't let him ruin this.
My pants fall to the floor and then he's gripping my jockstrap and pulling it over my erection, letting it spring free. Precum is leaking out already, and he slides his tongue over the tip, lapping it up and moaning. It's so fucking hot it makes my cock twitch. "Shit," I whisper. His gaze meets mine and those hazel eyes are partially hooded, he looks so blissed out.
"God, you're pretty," he says, and I almost gasp, because it sounds so sincere, and I've never had a hookup, or even Zach, tell me that before. Zach told me I was cute on occasion, at the very beginning of our relationship. My friends call me cute, but it's the first time someone has used the word "pretty" to describe me, and I kind of like it. Okay, I really like it.
My cock twitches again and he grips it in one of his huge hands and laps at the tip over and over until I'm biting my lip and trying to keep from squirming or whimpering. "Fuck," I mutter, when he licks from the base to the tip and then swallows me down. "God, that's good." He hums around me, making pleasure shoot straight to my balls. Then he's gripping them in his other hand and rolling them, tugging gently as he takes me to the back of his throat. "Shit," I gasp, unable to stop myself. God, his mouth is wicked. He bobs up and down on me for a few more seconds, then takes me to the back of his throat again, and I combust, biting my tongue to keep from crying out as my cock spurts load after load into his warm, wet mouth. I stare down at him as he swallows every last drop, then pops off of me and presses a kiss to my tip, before his eyes meet mine.
"Thank you," are the words that come out of my mouth next, and then my cheeks heat as I groan at how stupid that was. What is wrong with me?
He smirks and chuckles a little. "You're welcome, freckles."
Okay, that's a new one. I'm not sure what's with the nicknames but I find myself liking them. He reaches up and adjusts my glasses on my nose so they aren't sliding off, and I flush. "Can I?" I ask, even though my heart is still racing and my anxiety is picking up again.
He pulls my pants back up with him as he stands and tucks me back into my jock strap. "Sure can," he says, grinning at me.
I lower myself to my knees in front of him and pop the button on his jeans. His erection is straining against his zipper and I see the large wet spot on his black boxer briefs when I tug his pants down. Wow, he's even bigger than I thought. And I can't get enough of that toasted marshmallow and vanilla scent. I find myself burying my nose in his groin and inhaling, flushing when I feel his big paw on my head, gripping my curls.
"Damn, freckles," he breathes as some of his precum slides across my cheek.
Don't be such a fucking whore, Rory. It's embarrassing. Just suck.
I pull back and take the head of his cock in my mouth, sucking and licking around it. I want to moan at the feel and taste of him on my tongue, but I don't. His grip on my hair loosens and I take him a little further.
You know with how messed up you are you're lucky I ever gave you the time of day, let alone thought you were worth fucking. You can be someone else's problem now, if you can find anyone who will tolerate you.
I take him deeper as tears sting my eyes, and it's not from his size, or how full I feel with him inside me. I suck harder and he hisses, but I don't let up.
It's a good thing you have two holes cuz one of them is pretty useless, isn't it?
More tears fall down my cheeks as my head bobs up and down on his cock.
A guy like you and a guy like me? You can't seriously expect me to not get some action on the side now and again.
I gasp as I slide off of him and push myself to my feet. Tears are sliding down my cheeks and I don't say a word before I'm unlocking the door and bolting from the bathroom.