19. Mai

Chapter nineteen

Mai

T he tires of Ryan's car protested as we took the last turn onto the driveway leading to Thomas and Wally's house. I could feel the tension and exhaustion in my body, my knuckles white from gripping the door handle too hard. Next to me, Ryan was grim-faced.

It had been a long night and I couldn't remember the last time I'd slept. We'd moved all the guards out of the building. Sam and Derek were taking them to Sam and Mason's PI agency—they had a couple of holding rooms there that would contain them while they were interrogated. I doubted if the guards knew anything that would lead us to Ghost but you never knew.

We'd then stoked the fires in the building and watched it burn. Ryan had stopped the firefighters when they'd arrived, and only let them in when it looked like the fire would spread to the adjoining buildings. We both stank of smoke and chemicals now but at least they wouldn't be making ripple in that lab again.

I pulled my phone from my pocket with a shaky hand. Sofia answered on the second ring.

"Mai! What time is it?" she asked, her voice sleepy .

"Jase is hurt. He's at Thomas's place now. Can you come?"

Sofia didn't even hesitate. "On my way."

Ryan pulled up next to Thomas's faded blue pickup truck and killed the engine. Before Ryan could even open his door, Wally was striding out of the house.

I jumped out, just as Wally said, "He's stable. It's nasty though, and he lost a lot of blood."

"And the girl?" Ryan asked. I'd filled him in while we were watching the flames take over the building.

Wally hesitated. "You know what she is?"

"We know she's a witch. We also know she saved Jase's life," I replied.

"The Wolf Council will go crazy if they find out about her! You sure about this?"

I sighed. "I don't know what we'll do with her yet. I want to talk to her before we make any decisions."

"Well, she's in a worse way than Jase. Thomas says she's highly malnourished and has been badly beaten over a period of time."

I closed my eyes briefly, a flashback of Seth's fists hammering into my ribs hitting me.

Adrenaline spiked in me, and my heart beat wildly for a moment. Ryan was by my side in an instant. His warm arms wrapping me against his hard body. "You're safe, Mai. Seth is dead. He can't harm you."

I swallowed. I had no idea where that came from.

"Sorry, I just—"

"Don't you be sorry, Mai!" Wally interrupted. "You, girl, have nothing to be sorry for. It was all that piece of shit dickhead. He's the one that needs to be sorry. If, you know, he wasn't already dead, I'd make sure of it. Do you think the Moon Goddess frowns on us going and rekilling dead Shifters? Even if it's for a good fucking reason?"

He was rambling. That meant he was nervous. I put my hand on his arm and he stopped talking immediately.

"Thank you, Wally."

Ryan took my hand, and we followed Wally into the house. He led us down the hall and into the back, where Thomas kept his office and medical rooms.

Thomas was sitting behind his desk, writing notes on a laptop, but stood as soon as we walked in.

"Mai, Ryan," he nodded to both of us, keeping his eyes down. "You'll want to see Jase first, I suppose?"

Thomas knew me too well. "Yes. Please."

He opened a sliding door into a larger medical bay with two beds on each side of the room.

"You've expanded this," I observed.

"Well, turns out I've had need of more beds lately. I'm keeping my suppliers very happy, though, with all my new orders."

Hmmm. He was right; since I'd been back, the Pack injury count had risen considerably. We needed to make sure we paid for it out of Pack funds.

The witch was on the bed to the left. She was still unconscious, but her face was clean and she had some bandages across her body. Mason stood next to her, probably guarding her and guarding the rest of us from her. Who knew how she was going to react when she woke up. Mason nodded to me and Ryan .

Jase was in the right-hand bed and gave me a pained smile when he saw me. His injured arm was heavily bandaged and his other arm was hooked up to a drip.

Amara was slumped in a chair next to Jase. She looked tired, her blue hair a shock of color in this room.

"Did you find Talia? Is she okay?" Jase asked, leaning forward, his voice still weak. The boy wonder was worried about her. Knowing Jase, he was feeling guilty that he wasn't able to protect her. I should have punched Talia when I saw her.

"Talia's fine. Don't worry about her."

Jase relaxed back against the bed.

"You caught the fucking asshole who did this, right?" Amara demanded.

Thomas immediately stepped forward. "Amara has been a great help to me and Wally. Despite her appalling bedside manner, she has a natural instinct for doctoring. If she learned to think before she spoke, especially to her Alphas, she might live long enough to make a good doctor one day."

Amara snorted.

"Give us the room, Amara," Ryan ordered.

She glanced at Jace, and seeing no help there, she huffed, stood up, and strode out.

Thomas shut the door behind her. "She isn't talking about what her and Ben have been through. Wally and I are trying to help them feel safe first, before we start prying."

I nodded, as Ryan asked, "Jase, can you tell us what happened? "

As I got closer to the bed, the smell of antiseptic mingling with the metallic tang of blood made my stomach churn. Suddenly I felt too hot and took off my jacket and put it on the chair.

Ryan sent a sharp look my way. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," I replied, swallowing down the nausea. "I just need some fresh air."

He nodded, turning back to Jase. I walked back through the house and out the front door. Amara and Wally were nowhere to be seen. The early morning air was cool against my face as I looked up at the sky. It was still dark, with only a hint of pink and orange on the horizon. I took deep breaths, trying to calm my racing heart.

Would this get easier? Seeing people I loved getting hurt, knowing that they were putting their lives on the line for us, for our Pack? Would I ever be able to shrug this off and continue to make decisions that put them in harm's way? Did I want to be the type of Alpha who could just shrug it off?

Sofia's blue Ford Raptor tore into the driveway. It screeched to a halt, and Sofia jumped out.

"He's okay." I jerked my chin toward the door. "He's with Thomas and Ryan."

Sofia nodded and ran inside. I walked in behind her, needing a moment before I saw Jase again. Instead, I headed for the second-floor bathroom. It was a nice room, small, with a vase of daisies next to the sink. At my parents' funeral, Ryan had picked a daisy and given it to me. I'd kept it, along with his jacket that he'd draped over me, and an eagle's feather he'd given to me later. All little mementoes that had kept me linked to Ryan, even when I was far away.

I splashed water on my face and looked at myself in the mirror .

Silly human feelings.

My wolf was not impressed. I'd used the resources I had, to do what needed to be done to protect the Pack; that was all that mattered.

I felt so fucking tired. I sat down, leaning my back against the wall. Maybe I'd just close my eyes for a minute.

"Mai? You okay?" Sofia's voice, laced with concern, called from the hallway.

"I'm fine," I croaked. "Just...needed a minute."

Sofia let herself in, her expression immediately flooding with sympathy as she sat next to me.

"Jase is going to be just fine." She knew me too well. "He's telling Ryan what happened."

"I'm sorry, Sofia. We got information from Talia—you know, the werewolf from the Wolf Council that showed up after our Alpha challenge?"

Sofia's eyes went guarded as she nodded. She didn't like Talia or the Wolf Council any more than I did.

"She said she had information on the main ripple lab in the northeast. We worked out it was here, in Three Rivers. We went to shut it down. Talia was supposed to be watching Jase's back. It was a ruse, though. She was using us as a distraction. She wanted the information in the computers at the lab. She ditched Jase in order to get it, and he got attacked."

I gently touched Sofia's hand. "I'm so sorry, Sofia. It was our call. We shouldn't have trusted Talia, and your brother got hurt because of it."

Sofia studied my face. "Jase has wanted to be an enforcer since he was six years old. This is his dream, Mai. And to be an enforcer for you and Ryan, that's everything he's ever wanted. He loves you both, you know that. He'll do anything for you. You made the best decision you could, given the information you had. You are not responsible for Talia fucking Johnson's actions. Jase is alive. He's going to have a wicked scar that the girls are gonna love. And you now know not to trust the Wolf Council. It could have been a fuckload worse."

I leaned my head on her shoulder. "You're the best, you know that?"

"Oh, I know. Please make sure you tell me at least once a day, though. I'm sure that's part of the best friends' agreement."

"Soooo," I said after a moment. "We gonna talk about you and Derek kissing?"

Sofia's face went carefully blank. "There was no me and him smooching. He kissed me. I punched him. End of story."

She was wrong. For a minute there, she had totally been kissing him back.

"There's nothing between him and Shya, you know."

Sofia was silent for a moment. "Nothing now, or nothing then?"

"Nothing period. Not then, not now. He's not interested in Shya, and she certainly isn't interested in him that way."

"Then why, Mai? Why did he ghost me? We had one date, and it was…it was incredible," she whispered. "But after that, it was like he was a different person. He didn't respond to my texts or my calls. It was like I didn't exist. I can't…I can't trust my heart to someone who did that to me."

"I know he had his reasons, Sofia." The Derek I knew would never treat anyone, and especially not Sofia, that way. "I don't know if they're good reasons or not. But don't you owe it to yourself to find out? He's definitely not ghosting you anymore. Why don't you ask him?"

She sighed. "Because I'm not ready to hear what he has to say. I just want to smack him each time he opens his mouth. I'm so angry with him. I like this anger, though. It got me through the nights when all I can think about is his body next to mine, or when I breathe in his scent and feel like nothing will ever harm me, you know? I don't know who I'll be if I let it go."

"This won't be forever. You'll be ready at some point." I stroked her hair. "And I'll be here, no matter what, angry Sofia or heartbroken Sofia, scared of face-eating rats Sofia or madly in love Sofia."

"Okay, so maybe you're the best!"

I grinned. I was glad I was back here and had Sofia by my side again.

"So," Sofia said, sitting up and looking at me. "Are you and Ryan going to get pregnant or what?"

I blinked, frozen at the very thought.

"Pregnant? Don't be absurd!"

"Really? Isn't that the next step? Find your fated mate, seal the bond, have lots of big, fat puppies? I bet Ryan wants them. Or at least wants to indulge as much as possible in the process of making them."

Female werewolves could only get pregnant during the three days around a full moon. Our immune systems meant we didn't catch the sexually transmitted diseases that ran through the human communities, so we often had no need for contraception. With Seth, my ex-boyfriend, I'd been extra careful. As a werewolf, I was hyper-sensitive to when the full moon was. I could feel it in my bones, so getting pregnant by mistake was highly unlikely.

The door opened, and we both looked up to see Wally standing there.

"Preggers?" he squeaked.

"Shhhhh!" I gestured him into the room. "Keep your voice down!" The last thing I needed was for Ryan to overhear and get the wrong idea.

"Oh my goddess, oh my goddess, oh my goddess!"

"I'm not pregnant!"

Wally looked at me, his hands on his hips. "Denial. That's okay. Completely normal. I'll do the excitement for both of us! Oh, Goddess, I'm already thinking of baby socks knitting patterns!"

The mere suggestion sent my anxiety sky-rocketing. "No. No babies. Or puppies. Or wolf cubs. No small wolves. Nope."

"Ah, rambling. Also completely normal." Wally winked at me.

Sofia grinned at me. "Just you wait. You'll change your tune. And in the meantime, just enjoy the nightly thirty-six orgasms that Ryan gives you."

We found Ryan in the kitchen, speaking in hushed tones with Thomas, Derek, and Mason. I hadn't heard Derek arrive. The men looked up when Sofia, Wally, and I entered.

"How're our patients doing?" I asked.

"They're resting now," Thomas reported. "I've got them both on some pain meds. They just need rest."

I nodded. Jase was in good hands with Thomas .

I could feel Ryan's eyes on me, looking me up and down. A pulse of concern shot along our bond. I glanced over at him and smiled. "I'm fine."

He didn't look convinced, but he nodded and turned to Derek. "Any news?"

Derek was staring at Sofia, but she was looking everywhere but at him.

"Waylen's been hitting the caffeine hard and digging into that werewolf, Elias, who Greta named as her initial contact," Derek said. "Turns out he was a member of the Bridgetown Pack."

Ryan frowned. "We'll need to pay them a visit, see what they know about Elias and his drug operation before he died. Maybe someone over there will have a lead on Ghost."

He turned to Mason and Derek. "I want you two to head over there, see what you can find out. I'll call Michael and Camille and get you permission. Make it clear you're following a lead. I don't want to start any trouble."

Derek nodded, but I saw the glint in Mason's eye before he turned his head away. Going to Bridgetown would give him the chance to see Shya again. His wolf was probably going crazy, with her being so far away. Not that Shya wanted anything to do with Mason. She felt there was no future for them, not with her the Bridgetown Alphas' daughter, and Mason committed to the Three Rivers Pack.

"I should get home," Sofia said, interrupting my thoughts.

Thomas glanced at his watch. "It's nearly eight. I want to keep an eye on Jase, at least for another few hours. You're very welcome to stay if you want to. Or if you have things to do today, you can come back later? He's out of danger, Sofia. "

Sofia glanced at Derek, then back at Thomas. "I'll stay, if that's okay. I've got a couple more hours before I need to head back to take over for the lunch run."

Ryan strode toward me, his warm, strong arms pulling me into him.

"Let's get you home."

I nodded absently. I felt stretched taut, like my very soul was wearing away. I rubbed my face, realizing how utterly exhausted I felt.

"I'll get your coat," Wally announced, hurrying out of the kitchen.

I gave Sofia a quick hug. "Text me with updates. I want to know how Jase is doing."

"Sure," she agreed, as Ryan steered me toward the corridor.

Wally met us by the front door, handing me my jacket. "Get some rest, the both of you. Mai, we'll talk later, girl."

I mustered a tired smile before slipping into the car. As Ryan rounded the car, I placed my jacket on my knees, and my hand brushed against the box shape in my jacket pocket. I pulled it out, then quickly stuffed it back in. It was a pregnancy test. Wally must have slipped it in there.

I was going to kill him.