24. While You Were Sleeping

Isat on my parents" couch, my eyes glued to the TV screen as the Mustangs took the field again. The familiar sight of Hayes in his dark blue home uniform sent a pang through my chest, because I should fucking be there.

But instead, I was here, trapped in a stuffy living room with my mother, grandfather, and Xander, all because they"d guilt-tripped me into staying for some "quality family time." If quality time meant no one even talking to each other and the occasional cheers and boos at the television, yeah, then that"s what we were having.

I couldn"t even imagine what I"d missed by not hanging out with his family today. They would have at least talked to me. Some of them might have even been happy to see me.

God, I missed my Guncles. They"d been the best thing about this family for years, and while I had no idea what was going to happen to this weird new life I"d carved out over the past few months when they came home to their coffee shop and house, I"d much rather claim them as family than anyone in this room.

I tried to focus on the game, on the way Hayes moved with such grace and power, but my mind kept drifting to our last conversation, to the way he"d been worried for me. He"d called it when he said I needed to break free from the way my family"s expectations weighed heavy on me. Today demonstrated that more than anything else ever could.

The thing was, I had been free. Living abroad and only coming home for one visit a year had given me the space to be who I was, not the version of Willa they all expected from me. I didn"t regret volunteering to help George and Liam, but I wished I"d... I didn"t even know, maybe remembered who I was when I wasn"t around the rest of the Rosemounts all the time.

I really needed to get out of Denver.

The commercial break ended, and the game came back on. At least I actually cared about the outcome for once, and that gave me something to pay attention to. This one was a nail-biter, the score tied and the clock ticking down. I leaned forward, my heart in my throat as I watched Hayes catch the ball, his legs pumping as he raced toward the end zone.

A defender came right at Hayes, slamming him into the ground. How he did that every day and got back up so easily was beyond me. I watched and waited while the entire Cleveland Dawgs defense that had piled on him slowly got up.

And there was Hayes, still clutching the ball to his chest. The announcer declared the touchdown, but I barely heard him.

Hayes wasn"t getting up. He wasn"t even moving.

"No," I whispered, my hand flying to my mouth. "No, no, no."

Chris and Everett jogged over to him, and Chris knelt beside him while Everett frantically motioned to the sideline for the medical personnel to hurry over to them.

The stadium that had erupted into cheers went deadly silent.

The announcer"s voice was grim as he relayed the news. "It looks like the booth is calling a medical timeout, folks. And from what we can see, the staff are calling for the stretcher and the cart. Looks like they"re going to skip the med tent evaluation altogether and take Kingman straight to the locker room."

A second announcer said the last thing I wanted to hear. "That could indicate a serious injury. The League"s concussion protocol states that if a player loses consciousness they have to?—"

I was on my feet before I even realized I was moving, my heart pounding a frantic rhythm in my chest.

"I have to go," I said, my voice shaking. "I have to get to the stadium."

Xander scoffed, his arms crossed over his chest. "And do what, exactly? It"s not like they"re going to let you in. You"d just be in the way."

I whirled on him, my eyes blazing. "Give me your keys, Xander. Now."

He blinked, taken aback by the venom in my tone. "What? No. He just got his bell rung, the big baby. He"ll be fine."

Something inside me snapped, weeks of pent-up frustration and hurt boiling over. With a growl of rage, I launched myself at my brother, tackling him to the ground.

"Willa!" my mother shrieked, her hands fluttering uselessly. "What on earth are you doing?"

I ignored her, my fists pounding against Xander"s chest as I straddled him. "You selfish, insensitive prick," I seethed, punctuating each word with a blow. "Why can"t you just be happy for me? Why do you have to ruin everything?"

Xander struggled beneath me, his face red with exertion and embarrassment. "Get off me, you psycho."

"Not until you give me your damn keys and stop trying to fuck around with my life!"

My father"s voice cut through the chaos, calm but firm. "Enough, both of you."

I looked up, my chest heaving, to see him standing over us, his expression unreadable.

"Michael, make her stop this right now." My mother fanned herself and gave me that look. The same one I"d seen a hundred thousand times. The one that told me she loved Xander a whole hell of a lot more than she did me.

"Let them work this out," my dad said, holding up a hand to silence my mother"s protests. "This has been building for a long time. They need to get it out of their systems."

I clambered off Xander, my hands shaking as I pushed my hair out of my face. "I don"t understand why you hate Hayes so much," I said, my voice cracking. "What did he ever do to you?"

Xander sat up, his jaw clenched. "You mean besides abandoning me, abandoning our team, to go play hero in the big leagues?"

I stared at him, shocked by the raw pain in his voice. "Grow up, Xan. He didn"t abandon anyone. He worked his ass off to get where he is, and you should be proud of him. He was your friend."

"Proud?" my mother scoffed, her face pinched with disdain. "When Xander is clearly better than he is? Proud of a man who"s just using you to make your brother feel worse about not being drafted?"

I reeled back as if she"d slapped me, my stomach twisting with hurt and disbelief. "What? How can you say that? Me being with Hayes has never had anything to do with Xander. In fact, I fucking hid my feelings for Hayes for far too long just so I wouldn"t hurt Xan."

My mother scoffed. "And you just go around flaunting that you"ve gotten yourself a rich boyfriend. Well, you"d better hope you can rely on him to support you when you"re a lonely old cat lady. Because we won"t, and I won"t have Xander helping you anymore either."

My father stepped forward, his expression thunderous. "Carin, that"s enough."

He turned to me, his eyes softening as he fished his keys out of his pocket. "Go, Willa. Go be with your man. I"ll be there later. It appears I have some things to take care of on the home front."

I took the keys with shaking hands, my throat tight with emotion. "Thank you, Daddy. I"m sorry, I just... I need to be there for him."

He nodded, pulling me into a quick, fierce hug. "I know, baby girl. And I"m sorry too, for not seeing what was going on here. We"ll talk later, figure out how to make this right."

As I raced out the door, my heart pounding in time with my footsteps, I couldn"t shake the feeling that everything had just changed, irrevocably and forever.

But none of that mattered now. All that mattered was getting to Hayes, being there for him the way he"d always been there for me.

I"ll admit to texting and driving, but only because I messaged Jules to find out what hospital they"d taken Hayes to. I swallowed down tears when she replied that they would be there waiting for me.

I burst through the hospital doors a few minutes later, my heart in my throat as I searched for a familiar face. The sterile scent of disinfectant and the steady beep of machinery assaulted my senses, but I pushed forward, my focus solely on finding Hayes.

As I rounded the corner, I spotted the Kingmans taking up all the available space in the waiting room, their faces all drawn with worry. Jules was the first to see me, her eyes widening as she jumped to her feet.

"Willa, you made it."

I was engulfed in a sea of hugs and murmured words of comfort, the warmth of their embraces easing the icy grip of fear around my heart.

"How is he?" I asked, my voice raw with emotion. "Have you heard anything?"

Mr. Kingman shook his head, his jaw tight. "Not yet. The doctors are still examining him."

As if on cue, a man in a white coat appeared, and another in what looked more like a track suit. Both of their expressions were grave. The guy in the white coat called out, "Family of Hayes Kingman?"

We surged forward as one, our hands clasped tightly together. "That"s us," Mr. Kingman said, his voice steady despite the tension in his frame. "How"s my son?"

The white coat guy consulted his clipboard, his brow furrowed. "Hayes sustained a concussion during the game. We"re following the League"s protocols to the letter, and I want to keep him overnight."

Track suit held out his hand to Mr. Kingman. "I"m the UNC assigned to the Mustangs for today"s game, Mr. Kingman."

I whispered to Jules. "What"s a UNC?"

"Unaffiliated Neurotrauma Consultant. The League takes the concussion protocol really seriously."

Neurotrauma? I was maybe going to throw up. It was just a game. It wasn"t supposed to be life threatening.

Mr. Kingman nodded. "You did the locker room comprehensive concussion exam? You"ve got his pre-season baseline neuro report?"

"Yes, sir. Since he lost consciousness, the team's head physician and I both agreed that we needed to get him to the EAP-designated trauma center for more advanced evaluation and treatment. I"ve assisted on the diagnosis."

The bitter taste of bile and my grandmother"s Christmas goose rose up the back of my throat.

"We"ll get him into the training room in a few days, but he"s going to need to rest and avoid any strenuous activity for the time being."

I sagged with relief, tears pricking at the back of my eyes. Rest and avoid strenuous activity was so not what I thought he was going to say. I"d already spiraled into brain damage and learning how to walk and talk and feed himself again. Hayes was going to be okay.

"There"s more," the doctor continued, and my stomach clenched with renewed fear. "He also dislocated his shoulder during the impact. We"ve reset it, but he"ll need to keep it immobilized for a few weeks to allow it to heal properly."

Mr. Kingman nodded, his expression grim. "Can we see him?"

The doctor hesitated, glancing at the assembled crowd. "He"s still groggy from the pain medication, so I"m only going to allow one visitor at a time."

Mr. Kingman squared his shoulders, and I was ready to look for a chair to wait. I just needed to hear from someone who knew him personally that he was okay. I could wait. I could. I would. I might die first, but I could wait.

But then Mr. Kingman turned to look at me. "Willa, you should go."

I blinked, surprised. "Me? But you"re his father, you should be the one..."

He shook his head, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth. "No, I"m sure he"ll be asking for his fiancée sooner than he will his dad."

I stared at him, my mouth falling open.

Jules grinned, nudging me forward. "Go on, this isn"t our first rodeo in a hospital waiting room." She motioned to her six other brothers. "I practically grew up here. We know the drill."

In a daze, I followed the doctor down the hallway, my mind reeling. Fiancée? What on earth had Hayes been telling his family? Or perhaps they were all just savvier than I was at the moment and knew they wouldn"t let me see him if I wasn"t considered family.

I stepped into his room and saw him lying there, his face pale and his arm strapped to his chest, and all other thoughts fled my mind.

"Hayes," I whispered, taking trembling steps to his bedside. "Oh god, baby. I was so scared."

His eyes fluttered open, but they were hazy with pain and probably some really good drugs. "Willa? Did you see me win the game?"

"Of course I did, you big lug." I wanted so badly to touch him, to hold him, but I was worried I"d hurt him more. "Maybe next time, do that without scaring me half to death."

He smiled, wincing slightly. "I'm fine, flower. Just got my bell rung, that"s all."

I laughed, a watery, hiccuping sound. "That"s exactly what Xander said."

His expression went hazy at the mention of my brother. Shit, I shouldn"t have said that. He didn"t need to know right now that I hadn"t been at the game. I took his good hand and tangled our fingers together.

"You should go home, get some rest," he murmured, his eyelids drooping. "They"re gonna keep me overnight, make sure I don"t have any brain damage."

Gulp.

I shook my head, just barely holding back the tears, and opened my mouth to protest, but he cut me off with a gentle squeeze of my hand.

"I mean it, Willa. You look exhausted. And trust me, you"re gonna need all your energy to deal with me for the next few weeks."

I frowned, confused. "What do you mean?"

He sighed, his eyes drifting closed. "Concussion protocol. No practice, no workouts, no nothing. I"m gonna be a real pain in your ass until they clear me for activity again."

Despite the worry still churning in my gut, I couldn"t help but laugh. "Oh, joy. Just what I always wanted, a grumpy, stir-crazy boyfriend to babysit. You know no strenuous activity means no sex, right?"

His breathing evened out and the heart monitor beeped a steady rhythm, and I sat back in the uncomfortable plastic chair just watching him for a few minutes. I watched the rise and fall of his chest, the gentle flutter of his eyelashes against his cheeks, and I wasn't going anywhere.

I was really mad at myself for needing an almost tragedy to see that Hayes and the Kingmans were more family to me than anyone else in the world.

I cried silently for what I'd lost today, and for what I gained.