Chapter 31

Lorelai

M y mind was in turmoil as we walked from the Asterion meeting hall. If anyone had prophesied a few days ago what my life would have become, I would have said they were writing a fairytale and not a very happy one at that.

From a divorced records keeper to the wife of a Lead Advisor. From Lead Advisor's wife to knowing my Overlords wanted to slaughter my fellow humans, but somehow use me—and my potential child—as a symbol of unity and hope to soften the death blow.

No wonder they wouldn't allow us to dissolve our marriage, I thought glumly. Inside the transport, I allowed my head to fall back against the smooth, soft seat. Despair washed over me. It wasn't merely about bettering relationships between Earth and Asterion, or even Earth and the Instersteller Coalition. It was about putting a pretty face on their murderous plan.

"Are you well?"

Ellax didn't have to try hard to decipher what I was feeling. I wasn't exactly attempting to hide it.

"Not really," I replied, shaking my head against the seat. Outside the window, the wonders of a new planet, a thriving city, flashed by. I was too dispirited to pay it any mind.

"They want to slaughter people," I replied. "And they want to use me—us—to make it better. How am I supposed to be okay with this?"

"Perhaps they figured you would not care," he answered quietly.

"Not care?" I sat up, turning to stare at him. "I'm not supposed to care? I'm supposed to just happily go along with this?"

When he didn't immediately reply, I pressed, "Can't you do something about it? You're the Lead Advisor. Surely, you have the power to stop it."

I didn't know this alien male well, of course, but I could tell he was uncomfortable.

"I have not made my mind what to do," he answered. "I agree the wild humans need to be dealt with."

"By killing them?"

My voice was sharp, almost shrill. I didn't like myself this way—out of control. Almost hysterical. I breathed deeply to calm my nerves, even as he placed a warm palm over my hand in a comforting gesture.

"Lorelai. I did not say that," he rebuked. "Do I believe some wild humans are worthy of death? Yes. Those who abduct, murder, and rape their fellow humans."

"Then take them. Don't punish the rest."

"It is not as simple as that."

"Why not?" I challenged. "They mentioned the Elite. Who are they? What's their role? Couldn't they do something about it?"

The transport was slowing. We must be approaching Ellax's home. Still, I didn't remove my stare from his, forcing him to answer.

"The Elite are troops from each planet in the Interstellar Coalition," he explained. "They are truly the elite—the best of the best—trained to fight on any terrain, against any species, on any planet."

"Sounds like they'd be perfect for going in and hunting out the actual troublemaking wild humans, then," I tossed out. "Or their leaders. If they could take care of them, the rest wouldn't have to suffer."

"What about in the future?"

"What about in the future?" I refused to let this drop. "You have rebels here on your planet, don't you? Surely, you have some sort of police force to govern them. All societies have those. We used to on Earth, before everything went to pot."

Ellax turned his chin away, effectively dismissing me. Except he did add, "You are not wrong. Your solutions are, perhaps, as reasonable as the Council's. I have a great deal to consider."

It wasn't the answer I'd hoped for. I'd hoped he would jump up, admit that I was right, and vow to use his power to protect the wild people on Earth.

He doesn't know them, I had to remind myself. He doesn't have any affinity for them. He doesn't care about them. Maybe he could be persuaded to care—because of you. Maybe this is why you're here. To help save innocent people back home.

The magnitude of my position was enough to weigh down my shoulders. Could I do this? Could I be strong not only for myself and for a potential future child, but also for all of the rebel humans back home?

It was a great burden to bear. I wasn't certain I was up to it. Then again, I had no choice. Nobody else was in my unique position. I had to take the hand the universe had dealt me, and I had to play it.

No choice, Lorelai. No choice.

"We are here," Ellax announced. As he did, awareness that the transport had stopped forced itself to the front of my brain. I gathered my skirts, preparing to climb out. Ellax stopped me, placing his hand on my knee.

"Lorelai," he said. His voice was quiet and, honestly, as uncertain as I'd ever heard it. "While the idea of attacking the wild humans doesn't fill me with the same revulsion it does you, since they are not my species, I confess the notion sparks…fear."

I froze, not trying to fight his hand on my leg. He was telling me something sensitive, something important.

"Why?" I asked. In a flash, the answer came to me. "Because of your son?"

"I have not been a good father to Caide," he replied, turning to look at me. I swear, his gaze actually appeared haunted. There was a care, a concern, and a fear on his face that I'd never dreamt to see. Apparently, he truly was capable of far more emotions than pride, arrogance, and lust, as I'd once assumed.

"Regardless, I would be a truly awful sire if I chose not to care that attacking the wild humans might bring warfare to Earth."

"You mean, it will bring warfare to Earth," I responded, keeping my tone gentle.

"Yes. It will bring warfare to Earth. The wild humans will, undoubtedly, fight back. If there is an assault on the Citadel, will Caide be affected? Will his wife?"

There was a note of genuine fear in his tone. He was afraid for his son. And that made me respect him. Prior to this, I'd been attracted to him. Been a little afraid of the authority he wielded. A little in awe of his position. But I couldn't say I'd respected him. This was different. This was new. How long had it been since I'd respected my husband? I couldn't even remember with Charlie. That sentiment had died out years ago.

"Then do something about it," I urged, setting my palm on the hand he still kept on my knee. "You have the authority. You have the position. You're the Lead Advisor. You don't have to bring the Council's proposition to the Interstellar Coalition."

He shook his head grimly. "And if I do nothing, and the rebel humans should attack my son, his wife, or her family, when they are outside the safety of Citadel walls, would I have brought that on them due to my refusal to act?" He shook his head. "As I said…I have much to ponder."

Heavy air released from my lungs. My shoulders slumped. For the first time today, I acknowledged how unutterably weary I was. I think Ellax was feeling much the same. I could see the strain on his beautiful features, despite his cool, stoic demeanor. And then it hit me—if this was a lot for me to absorb, it was a lot for him too. In some ways, more than for me. After all, my sons were fairly safe. His son and daughter-in-law could potentially be in a line of fire, no matter what direction he took. And the future of a colony planet's species rested on his shoulders.

"You know what?" I said. "We're here. We're at our home. We both need rest. Let's go inside and forget our troubles for tonight."

I didn't fully realize what I'd said until I saw the pleased smile twitch at his lips.

"What?" I frowned. "What did I say that was funny?"

"Not funny," he replied. "I suppose I merely like hearing you refer to my house as our home ."

I blinked, taken aback. I had said that, hadn't I?