Chapter 2

"So, what are you getting at?" My eyes narrow as my boyfriend gets out of my bed.

He leans forward and runs his hand under my chin, a gesture that I think he believes to be sweet or romantic, but I actually find it incredibly uncomfortable. Like he's purposely pointing out my double chin when he does it.

Drew starts pulling his scrubs over his shoulders while I sit on my bed covered by a sheet as the rain falls outside my window. It feels every bit like I'm in some early 2000's pop music video.

The two of us hadn't spent the night together in weeks and last night really was no different. It felt platonic… at best. We cuddled and I made it very clear I wanted more, needed more, but he wouldn't budge. I would never force it. I've always been the one with the bigger appetite in our relationship, but aside from that, something felt off. And not just last night or this morning, but for weeks. Not feeling desired or wanted in a relationship feels every bit as crappy as one would assume.

On paper, Drew and I make sense. He's about to officially become a doctor and I'm currently a pediatric nurse. We both work at the same hospital and have nearly identical shifts. We care deeply about our jobs and we're both good at what we do. But outside of the fluorescent lights and sterile gloves, we couldn't be more different.

He's Dockers and cufflinks, weekends spent at conferences and constantly being on . While I live in the moment more, and I don't feel like being a nurse defines every part of me. That's my job, yes, but it's not who I am.

To his credit, when we first started dating, I do think I fit his picture of what he wanted in a partner. I was eager to begin working in the hospital and I let that excitement consume me at first, which is probably what he liked. It's almost as if the more he got to know me, the less he liked me.

"I've got to be at the hospital in thirty minutes, I don't think we have time to dive into everything right now." Drew pulls the drawstring on his pants, tightening them as he walks toward the bathroom.

I can hear the water running and the sound of him brushing his teeth. What the hell does he mean we don't have time to dive into everything? How much could there possibly be to discuss?

Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I toss a tank top over my bare chest and throw some shorts over my underwear before getting up. A quick chill runs down my spine when he reenters the bedroom.

"You just told me things between us have changed and I agree things do feel different. But shouldn't you elaborate? Shouldn't we discuss this?"

My fingernails feel like they're digging into my hips while I stand there in front of him. I'm no idiot, I can see where the conversation is going and I don't have any objections as to how it ends, but be a fucking man and spit it out.

"Why don't we have lunch together later and we can discuss it then?"

"No. We need to talk and I think we should do it now. I think I know what you're going to say and I… I agree with you. Things are different and it's not fair to either of us."

His head lowers slightly, reaching for my hand and like a complete fool I let him take it.

"I just don't want to waste time anymore. I'm about to really settle into my career and I'm looking for someone serious. I'm ready for a wife, Summer. I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I just need someone who is ready for those things."

My mind is saying a thousand words, but none seem to leave my lips as I stand there.

"You've been a lot of fun, but I can't do this anymore. It's too hard to change who you are and I need someone serious, someone who wants the same things I do. And I think we both know you aren't ready for marriage, you have a lot of growing up to do."

I was fine with everything he said up until the last part. I understand that he's ready for a wife. I'm not there yet. I understand that's why we've been so distant lately, he checked out. I can respect that.

But the last part? It's too hard to change me? I have a lot of growing up to do? I don't want to be with someone who wants to change me or make me feel like I'm hard to love. I've been down that road. I've heard the "you're a lot to handle" comments plenty of times and not once have they made me consider changing. I sure as hell won't make the exception today. I would've been fine ending this amicably, I didn't realize we were throwing punches.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh, come on. This can't be a shock."

I pull my hand from his grasp.

"Ending our relationship isn't a shock, no. We should've done it a while ago, honestly. And I'm fine with going our separate ways. But telling me that it's too hard to change me and that I have a lot of growing up to do is a low blow. Especially for you. I won't change who I am to fit the idea of who you think I should be."

"All you're doing right now is proving my point. You're lashing out and taking this personally." Drew shakes his head as he sits down to get his shoes on.

I haven't moved from the spot in my bedroom, my body literally feels frozen. How else would he like me to take it? He insulted me and I'm supposed to just roll over and take it? Before I can say anything, he lets out a sigh and continues to run his mouth.

"You aren't mature enough for a serious relationship, let alone a marriage. The other day, you asked me to have sex in a damn on-call room, Summer. While we were at work. Are you fucking kidding me?"

I scoff, rolling my eyes at his example.

"First of all, I said I was kidding… and second of all, does the thought of having sex with your girlfriend really disgust you that much? You've barely touched me in weeks."

He stands, rubbing his hands on his blue scrubs as he does. His dark hair is perfectly styled with the most obnoxious comb-over that makes him look ten years older than he actually is. I can't even believe I'm letting myself sit here and get annoyed by this man.

"I'm sorry if I've hurt your feelings, but this"—he gestures between us—"we're over."

Drew pulls his phone from the charger and slides it in the pocket of his white coat he just slid his arms into.

"I look forward to us still having a working relationship, though."

"Oh, lucky me." I lock my eyes on him.

"You're a good nurse, Summer."

"Believe me, I know."

His lips press together, as if forcing them closed not to say anything more before turning his back to me and leaving my bedroom.

My bare feet shuffle across the cool wood floor as I follow him.

I hear the doorknob turn without a word from him and before he officially leaves my apartment, I call his name.

He stops and looks down at me. I let myself study his face for a moment. The face of a cowardly man who was trying to prolong the inevitable today.

"If your wife doesn't ask you to have sex in an on-call room, joke or not, your relationship is boring and I stand by that. Have the day you deserve, Dr. McCall," I say quietly, closing the door in his face.

After a break up, I'd normally feel some sadness, regret even or a longing to have them back. Not today, though. I feel relieved. Like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders that I didn't actually realize needed to be lifted until thirty minutes ago.

Thank God I don't have to go to the hospital today and see him all over again.

Sundays are for football.

"You promised me sunshine and tequila when I said yes to moving here, yet lately, I'm seeing no sunshine and very little tequila." The umbrella pops open in front of me as I'm standing under the covered walkway, ready to trek back through the stadium.

It's now pouring rain and we're trying to make our way back to the family suite. I'm just glad Mia decided to bring the kids to this game, otherwise Abby and Mia would want to be out in this awful rain, sitting in the stands wearing their ponchos like all of the other fans.

"Weather is a fickle little bitch, isn't it?" Abby snarks as she rushes past me. Having her as my best friend for the last twenty years really has been the highlight of my life. And I take comfort in the fact that we are completely filterless with one another.

Her long brown hair is up in a high ponytail and the windbreaker she's wearing bears her last name, Anderson, in big bold letters. She and Ford have been married for just over a year now, but I'm not sure I'll ever get over the fact that she's married to an NFL player.

"I'm going to bust out of these jeans, who let me have so many waffles before we even left the house?" Mia holds her stomach that sports a tiny baby bump. It'll be her and Nate's third, since they already have twin boys, and I think she's already booked Nate's vasectomy.

"Who wears jeans while pregnant?" I ask, as I'm trying to keep pace with two of the fastest women alive. "And why are we running?" I pant out.

"Well, who wears jeans at all these days?" Abby chimes in, pulling the hood over her head as she rushes toward an awning.

"I'm just trying to get out of the rain. Plus, Hannah is with my boys and CeCe in the suite, so I want to get back before they make her pull her hair out." Mia rushes ahead.

Once we're back in Ford and Abby's family suite, I take my coat off and place it on the chair next to the sweetest three-year-old I know. Abby's niece CeCe sits on the big red chair with a large bucket of soft pretzels and a box of apple juice on the tray in front of her. Her hair is up in pigtails with custom made bows, one with the number nine and the other with a seven. She has on the cutest white t-shirt that says, " Go Daddy! " on the front with the number ninety-seven on the back.

"Hey, my girl!" I say as I take a seat next to her. I've known CeCe since she was born and feel an overwhelming sense of protection over her. She's always just been my girl .

"Hi!" CeCe smiles, offering me a pretzel as the kickoff happens and we both get settled in for the game.

Watching them play in the rain makes it look ten times more dangerous than it does on your average Sunday. The field is slick and you can tell it's affecting how the game is going. As the day progresses, CeCe and I continue to sit together, cheering for each positive play and yelling at the referees on the bad calls. She huffs and puffs when she hears a penalty called on Chase and her tiny arms cross over her chest.

"Those guys don't know what they're talking about," I whisper, giving her a wink and she smiles at me again.

"Booooo!" CeCe yells, following the crowd as another call doesn't go our way. I always enjoy watching the games with her. I think she understands more than we probably give her credit for. I've always been a football fan, even before my life was so intertwined in it. So, it's fun to see it through her eyes now.

I hear Mia tell the boys for the sixth time to " sit down and watch Daddy " but they just turned one and I can't blame them for having no interest in sitting still to watch a game. It amazes me how much energy they have for such little people. I had them sitting on my lap at some point to take some of the chasing off of Mia, but that was short lived.

"Okay. I'm throwing in the towel. I made it to halftime," Mia says, with her hands rifling through the diaper bag. She pulls out two tablets and turns them on. "Don't judge me. I need ten minutes." She sighs heavily.

"Are you kidding? I'm never judging you." I laugh. "I'm in awe of you. You're a superhuman."

I can't help but think of this morning. I have yet to tell the girls what happened, but I already know they'll both be out for blood once I do. It still annoys me to even think about what he said. Although, I am glad we broke up, because I know I didn't picture anything like kids or marriage with him. Even though those are definitely things I want one day, he just wasn't right for me. I'm worth more than just a fun time. With the right person, just as I am, I'll be exactly what someone needs and I'll be good at it.