Chapter 17

Chapter

Seventeen

Shay held onto Paul's hand as they drove in one of Aiden Porter's tricked-out Cadillac Escalades toward Glenwood Springs. Aiden and Autumn were thrilled they were going home together. Neither of them knew the nerve-wracking conversation they would have with Darian tonight.

She wondered what would happen after they talked to Darian. She was ready to go back to her normal life in Colorado Springs—teaching private lessons, coaching her team, and training—but she didn't want Paul to leave her side. That wouldn't work with his busy security and piloting career.

"After we talk to Darian …" she began. The evening shadows were deepening and the forest lining the highway and tall mountains made it darker even though it was barely seven o'clock. "What then?"

"Well, maybe we could get some dinner or go visit our parents." A smile played at the corners of Paul's mouth .

"Okay, short-term focus. Think bigger for me, please."

He pulled their clasped hands to his lips and brushed a kiss over her knuckles. "I thought I'd see what assignments Aiden has in Colorado so I can stay close to my favorite swimmer and date her."

Her pulse picked up. "We kind of skipped the casual dating part, didn't we?"

He nodded.

"So you'd define this as serious dating with ample time set aside for kissing?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Fire."

"I never said who my favorite swimmer was," he teased her.

"Not chill." She pulled her hand free and smacked his shoulder.

Paul chuckled. He reached for her hand and pulled it to his lips. He pressed a heated kiss to her palm that made her stomach flip flop. "Forgive me." He glanced away from the tree-lined freeway. "You know you're my favorite everything, Shay."

"No cap, that is gucci," she managed, sighing with longing at that look in his deep-brown eyes. She wanted to be done driving and kiss for a very long time.

They exited I-70 and she gave him directions to Darian's house. He was in a neighborhood only a mile from her parents. She was grateful Darian was close as their parents were getting older and she didn't plan on moving home anytime soon.

"You nervous?" she asked as they pulled up to Darian's brick rambler home. The lights were on inside and on the porch. The sun was gone, but it was still light enough to see outside.

"Yes. "

She didn't blame him. She doubted Darian would make this easy.

"You're cappin'," she said.

"Lying?" he interpreted, arching an eyebrow.

"Yes. You took out four nasty evil dudes to rescue me. Air Force Reconnaissance Lieutenant Paul Braven laughs in the face of danger."

He smiled at her. "Thanks, Shay." He looked at the house then back at her. "Four armed thugs seem easier to face than Darian."

"Come on. I'll hold your hand, and I've got your back."

"You're protecting me this time?" Paul's deep-brown gaze was warm and full of her.

"You got it, bruh."

He chuckled. "I don't want to be your bruh, Shay."

"Oh? What would you like to be? My pilot?"

"How about your boyfriend?" He leaned across the console, and she met him halfway. He gave her a soft, tender kiss.

"We could talk about boyfriend status," she managed shakily.

"How about your love?" he asked, increasing the pressure of his kiss until she was seeing stars—or maybe it was twinkling lights at an outdoor wedding she was seeing.

"That's fire," she murmured dreamily when he released her from the kiss.

"How about your future?" Cupping her cheek, he tilted her head and kissed her deeply.

Shay's door flung open, and she jerked back.

"What are you doing with him ?" Darian demanded, standing outside in the evening shadows, glaring past Shay at Paul .

Her brother looked professional as always in slacks and a button-down shirt. He'd taken off his tie and undone his top button. She always thought he was handsome with his blond hair and teal-blue eyes and tall frame but right now his brow was furrowed and his mouth pinched.

"Kissing," Shay said. "It slaps."

"How dare you?" Darian growled at Paul.

"Darian, stop." Shay pushed her brother back and slid out of the SUV to face him.

Paul's door popped open, and he raced around. He reached Shay and wrapped his arm around her. She leaned into him and gave him what she hoped was a reassuring nod. They'd face Darian together. Turning to her brother, she recoiled. She hadn't seen such raw fury in his face since the day Carrie had kissed Paul in the park.

A young couple with a baby in the stroller and a toddler on a trike approached.

"Hi, Darian," the woman called out.

Darian glanced at them and softened his stance. "Mary, Joe." He nodded to the adults then waved at the kids. "Trey, you're fast!"

"I know!" The little man beamed at him. "Watch me!"

They all stepped back into the grass as Trey pedaled hard and his trike picked up some speed. His parents hurried after him.

"Nice job, buddy," Darian called after them.

"Bye!" The little guy waved and almost tipped over. His dad caught the trike and steadied it.

Darian smiled, but it slid away as soon as he glanced back at them. He focused on Shay. "What are you thinking? "

"I need to talk to you," Paul said.

"I have nothing to say to you." Darian glowered at him. "Except get your hands off my sister."

Shay clung tighter to Paul, and he showed no intention of letting her go.

"You need to listen to him, Darian," she said. "This has gone on too long. You don't need to suffer anymore." Yet she worried Paul's confessions would just make him more angry and bitter. At least Paul's conscience could be clear.

Darian studied her for long enough she thought he'd demand they leave, but then he rolled his eyes. "Fine. Come inside and spit it out. Then you can leave." He whirled toward the house and marched up the sidewalk, muttering, "Don't need the neighbors listening in."

Paul and Shay followed. She glanced up at him. His jaw was tight and his grip on her firm. She didn't know what encouraging words to say.

Darian banged into his house. Paul held the door for Shay, and they left the beautiful late-summer evening behind and entered the chilly air conditioning. Darian's house was clean and bright with white walls, large windows, and no decorations. The furniture was all a dark gray leather. As soon as Shay shut the door behind them, Darian whirled to face them, folding his arms across his chest and scowling.

Shay suddenly got angry. She'd heard him rant about Paul. She'd tried to listen and help him forgive, but this was ridiculous.

"It's good to see you too, brother," she snapped at him. "Yes, I survived protective custody. Even though my FBI agent sold me out because his wife and baby daughter were kidnapped, their lives threatened if my agent didn't murder me. Paul rescued me, saved me from four brutes who were groping me and planning to rape and murder me. Then he watched over me and kept me safe. Then he threw himself at the FBI agent who shot a bullet that would've killed me if not for Paul's quick action and heroic skills. Thanks for asking how I'm doing."

Darian softened, swiping a hand over his face. "I'm grateful you're safe. Is that what brought you two together?"

"Yes," Shay said.

"Thank you for saving her," Darian managed to get out.

Paul nodded. "I would do anything for Shay. But I need to apologize to you because it's the right thing to do. I'm sorry for the everything with Carrie."

"You should be," Darian shot back at him.

"I am. I made mistakes, and I've regretted everything that happened with her and that you lost her. I wish I could make things right."

"Oh, now you want to make things right? After eleven years?" His eyes narrowed. "If you rescued Shay because it was ‘the right thing to do' then do the right thing now and stay away from my sister. That'll be a good step."

Paul stood straight and tall. "I've prayed for you and for forgiveness, and I'll keep praying, but I won't leave Shay."

"Of course you won't," he sneered. "Some kind of hometown hero."

"Paul is a hero," Shay said. "He's my hero."

Darian's jaw clamped tight. "When the hero complex wears off, I hope you don't choose to be with a backstabber who cheated with your brother's fiancée." Darian was back to confrontational in the blink of an eye.

"He didn't cheat. Not like you're thinking. And there's no hero complex. Yes, Paul is my hero, but he's also the most kind, brave, and loyal man I know. He is the man I've been looking for all my life."

"So you're here to tell me you're choosing him over me?" Darian folded his arms again.

"You're going to make me choose?"

"Yes! No sister of mine would be with him."

Paul stood like a rock by her side, not getting upset or trying to defend himself.

"No cap, you need to forgive and move past this." Shay was getting fed up. "Are you going to wallow your life away over some woman who didn't even want you?"

"She was confused," Darian roared. "Because of him." His shoulders heaved and he turned away. "I can't talk about this. Please just leave."

Shay was broken for him. Why couldn't he let this all go? Eleven years of heartbreak over a woman who was fickle and chasing his friend.

"I need to tell you everything that happened first," Paul said.

Darian just raised his eyebrows.

"Carrie emailed me the whole year you two were dating, and I responded. We emailed almost every day."

Darian's eyebrows shot higher. "I knew you were after her."

"We were friends. It's tough to be away from home, and you know bright and easy she was to talk to. Her emails really helped me." He shook his head. "But when I came home, she ran at me and kissed me at the welcome home party. I thought for a beat that you two must've broken up, but then I moved away from the kiss and saw you. I knew you loved her."

Paul hesitated as if debating whether he should say the hurtful things. Shay knew he needed to get them out. She nodded encouragingly .

"She told me she loved me."

Darian flinched.

"I told her that you were a great man, and that she should be with you."

Darian rolled his eyes but didn't otherwise respond.

"Then later that night, she came to my parents' house on a mountain bike and begged me to love her. I told her there was nothing between us and she should go back to you. She took off on the mountain bike, crying. I felt awful, but I didn't know what to do."

"Wait." Darian held up a hand. "You saw her on the mountain bike … before she died?"

Paul nodded. "I'm sorry."

"You should've called me," Darian shot at him.

"I did," Paul said. "You blocked my number."

Darian jolted and then rubbed his jaw.

"I'm sorry if this hurts you. I wanted you to know the truth and I wanted to finally apologize. I pray you can find healing and forgiveness. It was only recently that I was able to accept forgiveness from heaven and forgive myself."

"Well, I'm glad you could shed the burden," Darian said, sarcasm making his voice thick. "Because I can't."

Shay looked round to her brother. She'd known this might not go well and she could feel the downslide, read the angst in his teal-colored eyes.

"I want you out of my house and away from my sister," Darian hollered. "You just admitted that you had a relationship with Carrie, you tried to trick her into loving you, and then you let her die!"

Shay wanted to scream at her thickheaded brother, but it would do no good. She looked up at Paul. She'd seen this brave man take on four armed men and come out the victor. He was a hero of epic proportions, but he was clearly at a loss for how to make things right with her brother.

"Go," she urged. "I need to talk to him alone. I'll be outside in a bit."

Paul nodded and released her, turning to the door. He pulled the door open but then turned back to Darian. "I'm sorry for what happened with Carrie and wish I could make it right. I can't." He paused and then shook his head. "Even if you're furious with me, I expect you to treat Shay kindly, or I will give you more reasons to hate me." It was a warning. Paul would let Darian berate him, but he would not stand for her brother to hurt her in any way.

"I would never hurt Shay," Darian snarled.

"Thank you." Paul gave her one last look, then walked out the door, shutting it behind him.

Shay turned to her brother. He was still glaring at the door. She prayed to know what to say, how to help him.

"Darian," she started. "When are you going to let this all go? It's hurting you worse than anybody."

"Are you seriously dating Paul Braven?" he demanded.

"Yes, I am." She tilted her chin up.

"Everybody thinks he's some hero, but he's a fake and a cheater." She started to protest, but he overrode her. "You'd choose a backstabber who basically murdered Carrie over your own brother? You'd turn your back on your family?"

His gaze pierced her. Shay wanted to say so many things to him, but she felt frozen and awful. Was that what she was doing? Turning her back on her family? Her skin felt tight and dry and her stomach squeamish. She'd always loved her family. They'd supported her in her dreams when others said she was washed up or too old.

She loved her brother and appreciated all the times he'd championed her, but all she wanted to do was run outside to Paul.

How could she turn her back on Darian when he obviously needed her and her support?