27. Cagan

27

CAGAN

A s I set out on my journey to see my father and sister at her new clan, my mind and body flood with conflicting thoughts and emotions. I am deeply distraught at leaving Hayden and our precious Amira behind at Burning Sun. I wish they could accompany me to see my family. But I know Hayden is not ready for that quite yet. I must respect her wishes and wait for the time to be right.

I also feel great relief that my father and sister were able to flee from the rebels. After the attack, agonizing scenarios plagued my mind. I imagined them captured and tortured, or stalked ruthlessly through the woods. Not knowing their fate has been an icy dagger of fear piercing my chest. Now, I can finally breathe easy knowing they are safe.

The path ahead seems endless as I continue my journey through the dense forest. My mind oscillates between eager anticipation at seeing my sister's smiling face again, and dread at facing my stern father.

Our relationship has always been...challenging. Ever since my mother passed, the light in his eyes dimmed to hard flint. He pushed me brutally in weapons training, demanded perfection in every task, shaping me to become the ruthless warrior-chieftain he envisioned. I understand why now - losing Mother left a yawning void within him, so he filled it with ambition and thirst for power. But that does not wholly excuse how he warped my mind and soul.

Finally, after days of travel, I finally reach the territory of my sister’s new clan. I barely make it through the front gate when my sister Sharog spots me. Her face instantly lights up with joy. She rushes to embrace me, gasping excitedly.

"Brother! I feared I would never see you again after the attack.”

I return her enthusiastic hug, relief washing over me. Her familiar scent and melodic voice are like a soothing balm. "It brings me a lot of relief to see you and father safe. I was so worried."

She leads me towards their home, chattering happily about life in the new clan. Inside, I see my father Malamute sitting grimly by the fire. He stands upon seeing me, his expression unreadable as always.

"Father, I..."

He cuts me off, his voice booming. "You are late. I expected you days ago."

I clench my jaw, reminding myself to be patient with him. Some things never change. "Sorry. I came as swiftly as I could. There is much I wish to tell you."

His stern gaze softens slightly. "No matter. You’re here now." He embraces me briefly, his touch stiff but well intentioned. "Come, sit. You must be hungry after your travels."

Over a simple meal, I recount the last week since the attack, explaining how I came to live at Burning Sun. My father listens silently, his face an impassive mask.

Suddenly, a wide grin splits his face. "My son, I have arranged something wonderful while you were away."

My stomach drops. What scheme has he concocted now? I blurt out, "Father, what do you mean?"

Malamute continues happily, "I have negotiated with the Chieftain here. You are to take his daughter as your mate! An excellent match that will raise our status here. Isn’t that great?"

I stare at him, dumbfounded. Does he truly not know me at all? In a frustrated tone, I snap, "But Father, I must tell you...I reunited with my love Hayden at Burning Sun. She is my true mate. We even have a daughter, Amira. I came here to share this wonderful news with you."

Sharog smiles warmly, then shrieks excitedly. "A niece! I cannot wait to meet them, Brother."

Malamute interrupts abruptly, his pleased expression melting away, replaced by a scowl. "What? How can this be so? You've been gone only a week!"

I meet his glare steadily. "Hayden is my mate. Amira is our child. I did not come here to take another."

My father's face morphs into anger. "I will not acknowledge some random human's child as my grandchild! You will obey me and take the Chieftain's daughter as your mate!"

I feel rage boiling up inside me. After everything, he still tries to control my fate. Anger overtaking me, I shout, "I will not betray my family for your selfish ambitions! If you paid any attention besides furthering your status, you would know my heart belongs to Hayden. It has been this way for years!"

He scoffs derisively. "A human? Preposterous! I forbid it."

"You no longer control me! And you are not the Chieftain here!" I shout further. "I am not some pawn for you to manipulate. I make my own choices now."

His eyes blaze with fury. Spewing venom, he screams, "You are so ungrateful! After everything I did to prepare you as chieftain. This is how you repay me?"

"All you did was strip away my freedom and emotion!" I retort. "Since Mother died, you changed. You became someone I no longer recognize - cold, controlling, obsessed with power."

Pain flickers in his eyes but is quickly replaced by anger. "Power is all that matters in this world! I did what was needed to advance our clan."

I shake my head sadly. "At the cost of your own son's happiness. If this is the only reason you wished me to return, then I am afraid this is farewell."

I turn to leave but Sharog grasps my arm, her eyes glistening with tears. "Brother, please don't go!"

I embrace her tightly, wishing I did not have to cause her more pain. In a slight whisper, I reply, "I’m sorry, Sharog. I can’t stay where I am not free to love. Be well." With heavy steps, I make my way to the door.

"Stop!" My father's voice rings out. I pause and turn to see him slumped weakly in his chair, looking suddenly old. "Tell me… about my grandchild."

I stare at him warily. Is this some kind of trick? But his eyes hold a glimmer of something I have not seen since I was little. Some softness buried deep beneath the hard exterior.

Cautiously, I speak, a smile soon spreading across my face. "Her name is Amira. She is so tiny, but her spirit outshines even the brightest stars. And when she smiles, the whole world feels lighter. She even has Mother’s eyes!"

My father stares at me, stunned into silence. For the first time I can remember, the hard lines of his face soften.

"She has… your mother's eyes?" he asks quietly.

I nod, a lump forming in my throat. "The same ones When she looks at me, it's like Mother gazing back."

My father's stern composure shatters. Tears spill down his weathered cheeks. The great chieftain crumbles before me, sobbing like a broken soul. Soon, my father embraces Sharog and I.

"My children, can you forgive this stubborn old orc for how I have wronged you?" he says, his voice thick with emotion.

I squeeze his shoulder, overcome with empathy for his inner turmoil. I say gently, "You were only doing what you thought was right, Father. Of course we forgive you."

Sharog nods, smiling through her tears. She whispers, "We’re just happy to have you in our lives."

My father takes a deep, shuddering breath. "I vow to atone for my cruelty and neglect. From now on, I will strive to be the father you deserve - caring, supportive, and loving." He pulls us close once more. "I am so proud of you both. Thank you for not giving up on this cantankerous old orc."

I chuckle, my heart brimming with hope. "We could never give up on family."

Sharog playfully nudges Father's shoulder. "Just wait until you meet little Amira! I bet she'll have you wrapped around her tiny finger in no time."

Father beams, his eyes shining. "I look forward to meeting her soon."

Laughter rings throughout the home, the sweet sound of healing and hope. My heart swells with joy to have my family made whole again. I feel as if a crushing weight has been lifted from my chest. The icy chill of anger and resentment that lingered between us has finally begun to thaw.

I look at my father and sister, their faces creased with unrestrained joy. Father's deep, bellowing laugh shakes his broad frame like thunder. Sharog's melodic giggles dance like music across the room.

This is how it should have been all along. Not the callous indifference and strict expectations my father showed me, forcing me to become his rigid vision of the perfect chieftain. Not the sadness lingering behind my sister's eyes whenever she looked at the two of us and our fractured bonds. Just...family, together in love and laughter.

There will still be challenges ahead. But now, we have hope. However long and winding the road, we will walk it as one. I close my eyes, etching this blissful moment into my heart and soul forevermore.

Together, we will walk into a new dawn. The past is behind us, and the future looks brighter with each coming day. The sun of hope rises, banishing the icy darkness that once gripped our hearts.

I feel a lightness in my spirit that I have not known. The world seems painted in vibrant hues, no longer the bleak shades of gray that clouded my eyes for so long

With my family by my side, I can achieve anything. The broken bits of our past can create a new mosaic. We have been gifted a second chance - one I vow not to squander. Each coming day, we will heal and thrive together.