Chapter 9

Chapter

Nine

MIRANDA

“ H as Ms. Smill come in with her deposit yet?” Mr. Barker asked Miranda and she stared at him. He had white hair, and wore a pressed gray suit today. Laugh lines creased his worried eyes.

Blackridge Bank swirled around her. Long teller desks, pillar lights, checkered marble floor.

She couldn’t be here. She wasn’t here.

“Miranda? Are you all right?”

This wasn’t right. The bank looked distorted. The floor was jagged. The wood desk was fuzzy. The work screen was blank.

“Did you skip breakfast again, Miranda? I restocked the break room. Why don’t you take yours early and get something to eat?”

Only the view out the front windows was clear. The busy city street visible with dreary skies—and cars and people.

So many people.

“We-we have to get out of here. We have to?—”

The air raid sirens pierced through her, rolling around in her brain. She covered her head, squeezing her eyes shut.

She was in the vent.

The weight crushed her. The metal snapped and groaned. Searing heat blazed all around her, burning her. She couldn’t get out. She couldn’t escape. She would be cooked alive.

Blinding light pierced her mind and she screamed.

She screamed so loud.

And her babies screamed with her.

Oh god! She couldn’t save them!

“Miranda!”

She gasped, scrambling out of the nightmare, clawing and sputtering.

Govek held her. “I’ve got you. You are with me.”

“They’re dying!” Her voice didn’t sound like her own. “They’re dying. We have to get them out! We have to help them.”

“Miranda, it’s a dream. Just a dream.”

His voice was steady, firm, and it yanked her back to reality.

The reality that her babies weren’t dying anymore. They were beyond help. They were already?—

No. No! It wasn’t true.

They hadn’t suffered like she had. They hadn’t been burned or crushed. Their parents had saved them. They’d made it to the ocean. To Faeda. Just like she had.

They had .

She pressed her head into Govek’s chest, breathing in his rich pine scent, soaking up his warmth. She stroked the mattress under her fingers, moving them up to the mountain carving at the head of the bed. She traced the peak and breathed in the scent of the wood.

Clean air, no exhaust fumes or chemical undertones.

Govek’s body felt a little tense under her as he pressed his mouth to the top of her head. She felt him gulp against her scalp.

Then he let out a very low, tender rumble.

The sound was like nothing she’d ever heard, like a buttery vibration easing away every drop of tension her muscles held. It rolled over her skin, wiped out all her thoughts and soothed her mind back into drowsy bliss.

“Thank you. That’s good,” she whispered, wanting him to keep it up. And he did. His body relaxed at her praise, and he growled again. “That feels good.”

He let out a pleasure drenched huff, a chuckle of disbelief. He growled again, and she shut her eyes. They lay like that for a long while, but unlike the other three times she’d been woken from nightmares that night, her mind refused to slip back into slumber.

“I’ll get your water,” Govek finally said. His voice gruff from exhaustion.

“Not yet.” She curled into him. She stroked his bare chest, and he huffed. “I’m sorry I’ve woken you up so many times tonight.”

“It is fine, Miranda.”

“Was I rescued by an orc or a saint?”

He didn’t respond, only moved away slightly so he could reach the cup on the bedside table. She’d forgotten how big he was. How easily he could reach across the massive bed.

Morning light was barely breaking through the bedroom window. Massive dark trees loomed around them. A subtle breeze blew leaves past the glass. The crackle of the fire from the living room was soothing, dappling shadows on the wood walls. Everything was naturally built. No plastic. Barely any metal, even.

She took a sip of the crisp water. It tasted unreal. So pure it barely had any flavor to it.

Nothing like Earth.

She took a deep breath and tried to push the memories of desert waste and burning chemicals out of her mind. Even before the bombs dropped, water had to be triple filtered so it could be drinkable. Five times in the case of Riverside Daycare. It was one of their selling points. A twelve-stage filter—only the best for them. Her babies.

Her stomach rolled and her eyes burned, and she thought she might upchuck the water she’d just had.

“Miranda?”

Govek tipped her chin up, and she looked at his unearthly face. Green gold eyes, light emerald complexion, strong jaw with a slight underbite, pointed tipped ears. She grazed her fingers along one and he shivered.

He was not of Earth and that fact brought her endless comfort.

“I’m sorry,” she said, withdrawing her hand. “I’m sorry I keep waking you up.”

The nightmares just wouldn’t stop. No matter how hard she tried to block out all her painful memories, they kept getting worse .

“All is well, Miranda. I do not mind.”

She shot him a smile before resting her head on his chest.

He took the cup from her and set it on the table again. His pillows smelled of him, musky pine.

She chose to use his shoulder instead of the pillow. “How much time do we have left to sleep?”

“Not much. It’s later than it seems. The day’s grow short as winter comes in.”

“Hmm.” She glanced out at the quiet dawn. “Do you think the seer will be at the announcement?”

Govek hesitated slightly. “Perhaps.”

“I just want to know, ” Miranda said slowly. “I’m certain he’ll be able to help me recover my memories and tell me what happened to them. I know it’s a long shot, but do you think... do you think maybe they lived? The babies I took care of?”

Govek tensed under her.

She looked up into his face and found his brow furrowed. “I know it’s crazy. I know that. Really. But just like... it’s possible, right? I lived. And there were those road signs. Someone must have gotten them working, so why couldn’t it have been them? I’m pretty sure Josephine’s dad even worked for the Highway Department. It could have been him and they could be here now. Lost in the woods like I was, just waiting for us to find them. And the seer would know where they are, right?”

It was insane. She knew that.

But . . . what if?

“Seer Evythiken’s power is immeasurable,” Govek finally said. “If anyone can unlock your lost memories and find other humans from Earth, it would be him.”

“Yeah.” Miranda said, trying to push her stupid hope out of her brain even as it sunk deeper. “Can we try to see him today? Even if he isn’t at the announcement?”

“Yes. We should also see Hovget, the healer.”

“I don’t need a healer.” Miranda said. “I’m not hurt.”

“We need to ensure you’re healthy, Miranda.”

“I don’t...” She chewed her lip. Being told she was healthy was almost more terrifying than being told she wasn’t.

She should be irradiated, but she wasn’t. She should have been burned alive, but she hadn’t. She should have died from falling off that cliff, but she didn’t.

Nothing made sense.

“He could also have something that might soothe your nightmares and allow you to rest well.”

Guilt chewed at the edges of her mind as she looked into Govek’s eyes, noting the dark green bags under them.

He needed rest too. He’d been her rock from the moment she’d fallen out of the sky.

She leaned in and kissed his warm cheek, right next to his tusk. “Thank you, Govek. For taking care of me. You really are a sweetheart.”

He huffed out a laugh that rumbled through his chest under her ear. “Fuck, woman. The things you call me.”

“What? You don’t like sweetheart? Tough guy is better, huh?”

“At least tough guy is an accurate description.”

She smiled. “I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you give yourself a compliment.”

He shifted uncomfortably even as he pulled her closer. He turned his head toward her, carefully lowering his nose into her hair. He tried to breathe deep without her noticing, but she totally did.

And it felt good. His attraction to her was so obvious all the time and it soothed that bone-deep wound from her childhood that had never fully healed. “Dang, years of therapy, and it turns out all I really needed was an orc who was magically stuck to me like Velcro.”

There was a slight pause before Govek grumbled. “What do crows have to do with imprinting?”

Miranda gave into laughter so hearty, she actually had to sit up and wipe her eyes. “Oh my god, Govek. That’s not...never mind.”

“Are you . . . upset by the imprint?”

“No. Not at all. Not even a little bit. It’s great actually. Quiets all those orphan abandonment issues that like to pop up from time to time. That’s probably not healthy, is it? Liking that you’re magically attached to me. But whatever. I’ve always liked clingy. That’s why I worked with toddlers. They fall in love with you instantly for the simplest things and try to follow you, even into the bathroom. Not that I want you to watch me pee, that’s not what I’m saying, I just?—”

“Miranda?” Govek brushed the small of her back.

She collected her thoughts. “Anyway, what I’m saying is you can be clingy with me—as much as you want. If I don’t like it, I’ll tell you and we can work it out. Together. Okay?”

Govek’s eyes widened, and she couldn’t decide if his expression was one of surprise or wonder. Regardless, it was good, and she smiled, resting on him again.

“Miranda?”

“Yeah?”

“I will never abandon you.”

He said this easily, as if he really meant it, and it was the simplest thing in the world to promise.

She looked into his eyes again and the sincerity there made her chest grow tight. She squeezed around Govek’s middle and pressed a kiss to his cheek that she was certain didn’t even come close to reciprocating how good he’d made her feel.

“You sure know how to say exactly the right thing,” Miranda said, her eyes sliding shut as she listened to the steady drum of his heart under her ear.

A knock sounded from the living room.

“Someone’s at the door?” Miranda asked, trying to sit up, but Govek quickly pulled her back down.

“Fuck them.”

“The same way you fucked me last night?” she teased, forcing a chuckle out of him.

And then his breath caught. “You’re bleeding.”

“I’m bleeding?” She didn’t feel hurt, only mildly sore around the thigh area and some achiness in her lower stomach that indicated she was about to— oh, frick.

“Uh,” she forced him to let her sit up, looking down between her legs. She’d bled on his sheets. Dang it. “I’m so sorry. I can do the laundry. And do you know where I could find some pads or something?” Did they even have anything like that here?

Govek ripped the blanket off without preamble and she yelped as cold air blasted her.

The agonized expression on his face, joined by his claws slinking out and his body shuddering with withheld fury had her heart dropping. “I injured you.”

“No,” she insisted, quickly. “No, no. You did not. I’m just?—”

Another harsh knock sounded. This time followed by the sound of a woman’s voice.

“You are fucking bleeding, Miranda. Only I could have caused this.”

Another harsh knock at the door.

“I’m on my period, Govek. That’s all,” Miranda assured him. “Who is that?” If it was one of the nicer women, then she could probably ask them for supplies.

“What the fuck is that?”

“What is what ?” Miranda asked as the pounding became more insistent.

Govek got out of the bed, wrenched open the trunk, and threw the dress she’d gotten the night before at her. “We need to get you to a healer,” Govek said, too loudly. “Put that on.”

A muffled cry sounded at the door. “Govek, let me in.”

“Is that Viravia?” Miranda asked, obeying his command to get dressed and starting for the doorway. “I can ask her for pads.”

“Fuck,” Govek raged, storming up behind her. “Fine.” He passed her by and started for the front door, only to stop, frown with confusion and go to the back door instead.

He wrenched it open so hard Miranda suddenly knew how the front door had been ripped off its hinges.

Viravia scampered back, eyes wide in the bright morning light and her cloak hood tucked up tight around her hair. She held a wicker basket held tight in her arms. “G-Govek, where is Miranda?”

“I’m here,” Miranda called as she entered the living room still buttoning her dress.

“Take her to the healer, Viravia,” Govek demanded, walking all the way to the kitchen.

“Yes,” Viravia said, rushing inside, putting down the basket on the couch. Her warm hands curled around Miranda’s shoulders. The warmth of them soaked through the dress. “Come this way. It’s all right.”

“What?” Miranda shot her eyes back to Govek, who was looking pale and horror-stricken, and her stomach knotted. “What the—what is going on? I don’t need a healer.”

“I damaged you. Get her aid, Viravia.”

“I’m not going anywhere without you,” Miranda snapped, forcing the woman’s hands off her shoulders. “And you didn’t hurt me . I told you. I’m on my period.”

“Period?” Viravia asked cautiously.

“Menstrual cycle. Monthly bleeding? Aunt Flow? Crimson tide? Govek didn’t knock me up, so now my body is furious and intends to torture me for the next four or five days.”

“Ah, yes, I understand,” Viravia said quickly. “So, you don’t need a healer.”

“Not unless you’ve got pain killers or something cause the cramps are worse than a sledgehammer to the gut, but?—”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Govek demanded, looking between them. “You’re bleeding, Miranda.”

“For crying out loud”—Miranda pinched her nose—“it’s too bloody early for a sex ed talk.” She snorted, shaking her head. “Though I guess not too early to get all bloody .”

No one laughed.

Viravia was pale, eyes averted, and Govek had his fists balled hard enough he was probably cutting himself again and Miranda groaned. “Oh my god. I’m not hurt, Govek. This is going to happen every month. I could get super detailed and complicated but I’mma save that for after I’ve had whatever equivalent of coffee you’ve got.”

“Every month?” Govek asked carefully.

“Yes. For most women, it’s a regular occurrence, and it’s completely natural and I do not need help and you did not do anything to cause it. Other than, as I said, not get me pregnant. But that’s a good thing where we’re concerned.”

He remained silent.

“Govek, if you had hurt me bad enough to make me bleed you would have noticed while we were cleaning up last night.”

Realization flashed in his eyes, but he still shook his head and stammered. “But Yerina said that—” He looked away, wrenched his hand through his hair, but wouldn’t meet her eyes.

What did his ex have to do with any of this?

Viravia, bless her, quickly changed the subject. “I brought you clothing, Miranda. And if Govek has fresh linen, I can show you how to fashion something to keep yourself clean.”

“I’m assuming I just bundle up that linen and put it in my underwear?”

Viravia nodded.

“Then I’ll be fine on my own.” She sighed heavily. She’d never looked forward to her period before, but now she was really not looking forward to it.

“All right.”

Then the woman just stood there.

“What else, Viravia?” Govek grated.

“Well, I... I heard about the announcement today,” Viravia ventured, “Kar-er... the warlord’s announcement. I just wanted to know if you knew what it was about.”

Govek’s eyes flashed nervously to Miranda. “I do not.”

“Didn’t you talk to him last night?”

“Yes, but all he said was that I must be there, which means we need to make ready. Now.”

“Then, I’ll go. Miranda, feel free to visit anytime if you need anything.”

“Thank you.”

Miranda waited until the door closed behind the woman before turning to Govek. “So, what exactly did your ex-girlfriend tell you about periods?”

“Nothing.”

“She made you think they were your fault somehow? That you hurt her? If so, that’s really not okay.”

Govek said nothing but his expression revealed everything Miranda needed to know. Dang, no wonder the guy had so many hang-ups.

She crossed over to him and picked up one of his hands, forcing it to uncurl. To his credit, he only tried to pull away once, even though his claws were out. Little pricks of blood dotted his palms.

“We’re gonna break this habit of yours, Govek,” Miranda muttered, reaching for another cloth on the counter even though the wounds were already closed. Dang, orcs healed fast.

“I am sorry.”

“Lean down here.”

He obeyed, and she planted a kiss on his lips. One that she’d meant to be quick and sweet but turned a little too heated. “Damn, Govek. You taste too good.” She kissed his cheek and patted his chest. “How long do we have before we have to leave? Do you have any food?”

He grumbled a curse under his breath and looked around. “We will get you something at the hall.”

“Okay. Let me get cleaned up a little. I need to pee.”

She freshened in the bathroom and got her cloak on. By the time she was done, Govek had finished dressing and the sight of his tight button-down shirt and loose pants had her warring with herself.

“What?” Govek asked, brow furrowed.

“I honestly can’t decide if I like you better shirtless or like this.” She stroked his broad chest, and he huffed.

“This is the only shirt I have left. I will have to get more from the storeroom,” he said as she pulled away. He went to the front door and was careful, but it snapped off the other hinge, anyway.

Miranda burst into laughter at his disgruntled expression. “Oh man, your brute strength is really getting the best of you now. You better be careful or the whole house will be rubble.”

She hurried out, and he propped it in the doorway. “I promise to repair it.”

“Eh, whatever. It doesn’t look like anyone is going to rob us way out here.” Miranda noted how far away the nearest homes were.

He fell into step beside her on the path, frost glittered in the sunlight, making the forest look like a glazed donut. Dang, she was hungry. She hoped the food in the hall would be good.

“Why is your house so far out here?”

He didn’t respond, but his jaw was set, tucked all the way up again. She took his arm in hers and tipped her head up toward the sky.

Her breath caught from the sight above her head. “Govek, what is that ?”

High above, the canopy of the huge trees blotted out most of the sunlight with their orange and red leaves. It was thick enough that it should have been impossible for the rays to get through, except some of the leaves weren’t colored. They were clear, as if made of glass. Streams of sunlight cast through the clear leaves and brightened up the canopy until it appeared to glow.

“What are those?” Miranda asked in wonder, her eyes fixed to the sight. The leaves glittered, sparkling as they swayed.

“Those are the leaves of the Great Rove Tree,” Govek said, pointing in the direction they were walking.

Miranda spied a truly massive trunk in the distance. So huge that it was almost difficult to comprehend among the rest of the forest. It stretched far above the others, breaking into thousands of branches and spiraling into the trees surrounding it. The glittering leaves reflected the bright red and yellow of the surrounding fall trees so vividly it looked like that area of the forest was on fire.

“Wow.” Miranda breathed. Her throat constricted. “It’s so . . . are they made of glass or . . .”

Govek studied her expression a moment before turning his attention to the canopy above. They’d just reached a more well-kept path and a few tree dwellings surrounded them. He moved away from her, and she thought he might be going to visit a neighbor. Instead, he selected a medium-sized tree without a house in it and shoved it. Hard.

The tree shook, swaying the branches, leaves rained down around them in a torrent. Miranda burst into laughter, covering her head from the onslaught.

Govek was back at her side a moment later, smiling lightly, and holding out one of the crystalline leaves for her to see.

She gasped, taking it gently, but it wasn’t nearly as fragile as she thought. It felt like a leaf, was shaped like a leaf, but visually, it was like it was made of water. She could see her hands through it and her own blurry reflection on the outside.

“It’s amazing.”

“Yes,” Govek agreed. She shot him a smile as he explained. “The Rove Tree’s leaves don’t fall in the autumn. They remain above to protect the clan from harsh weather. It was one of the Fades first creations.”

Miranda looked up again, so drawn to the sight of the tree that she hardly noticed her surroundings until someone cleared their throat nearby.

She jerked to look, finding several orcs had left their homes and were watching intently.

They looked very different from Govek. Although they were similar in color, these orcs were slender, tall, and lacked the brawny muscles Govek sported. Almost like the difference between a male model and a construction worker. A scented candle versus a roaring bonfire. Flavored water next to a quad shot.

Miranda grinned. She’d always preferred buff over puff.

But all amusement died when a few of the orcs began openly whispering to one another and pointing. One even stepped in their direction.

Govek let out a growl of frustration so deep Miranda thought an earthquake might have been starting up.

And of course, the thrill shot right through her. Her thighs clenched as she squirmed. Damn, his grumbling, and its ability to get her all fired up.

In a flash, Govek’s fury evaporated, and his head whipped toward her. His nostrils flared in a way that was far too telling.

“Oh, don’t tell me,” she gasped out, trying to stifle her arousal even as his hungry expression began to torture her. “Your sense of smell can’t possibly be that good.”

“It is,” he confirmed, and she couldn’t tell if she wanted to spontaneously combust or bury herself alive. “As it is for all orcs.”

All? Her cheeks were rivaling the brightest of the leaves as her gaze shot to the orcs who’d been watching. She caught the tail end of their alarmed and shocked expressions before they bolted in the other direction.

Oh god. “Don’t tell me they’re also going to the hall?”

Govek’s eyes narrowed. “They likely are.”

She let out a ragged sigh. “Any chance they’re going to forget about what they just smelled?”

“You are embarrassed?”

“Well, yeah. I’m gettin’ all hot and bothered in public from just the sound of your voice. They’re gonna think I can’t control myself—which I can’t—but still.”

“You needn’t be,” Govek assured, placing his hot hand to the small of her back to get her moving again. “The scent of female arousal, in varying degrees, is quite common among our clan.”

“If it’s so common, then why did those guys look like they’d just been slapped with a salmon?”

Govek blinked before bursting with booming laughter that spread warmth all the way through her. “Fuck, woman. You are going to ruin me with your words.”

“It will be the fun kind of ruining though, right?” she teased as he got himself under control. His laughter was wonderful, full and rich with a smile that completely transformed him. Her heart was going to burst right out of her chest if he kept looking at her the way he was now.

His laughter finally petered out as he looked up the path. She followed his gaze. Some of the orcs had stopped to openly gawk at them. Even at this distance, she could see that they were disapproving.

She was starting to understand why Govek had left.