58. Tammy

CHAPTER 58

TAMMY

As much as I'd wanted to bolt from the house, my practical brain was smart enough to make me pack a few things and get organized. Kai trailed me like a shadow, as if he was afraid I'd leave without him or something.

Hudson moved downstairs with his whiskey bottle. The volume on the TV was turned up to obnoxious, and I gritted my teeth, rushing to grab the last of my stuff.

I didn't bother saying goodbye as I left the house.

It felt so wrong.

Even though I was ready to end this farce of a marriage, I didn't want to do it like this.

By the time I'd packed up the car, tears and snot were streaming down my face, making the simple task of buckling Kai into his booster seat nearly impossible.

"I got it, Mommy." His little hand brushes my tears away before he takes the buckle from me, showing me how to make it click.

I smile down at him. "Love you, baby." Kissing his forehead, I move to the driver's seat. I'm still running on adrenaline, but that will soon fade; a caffeine kick is probably necessary. So, I stop at a gas station just outside Chesterfield and buy myself the biggest coffee I can. Kai has already fallen asleep, which is a blessing.

We hit the road again, and I play quiet music, wanting to stay awake and alert. Nolan is too far to make it in one drive, so I'll need to start thinking about a motel eventually. But right now, I just want to get some distance.

Nearly two hours in, Kai wakes up disoriented and starts crying and whining, wondering where we are and what's going on.

The sun is rising in my rearview mirror. I've been up all night, and it'd be stupid of me to keep driving because the thought of stopping and having to function like a normal human being is too much.

I need to find a safe place and get some decent shut-eye. Taking the next off-ramp, I pull into the first motel I see. It's obviously popular with travelers, and I'm guessing each room is filled with someone who is on their way to someplace else.

The reception office is just up ahead when I slam on the brakes, the air whooshing out of my lungs as I spot the tall man running down the stairs. He has a bag flung over his shoulder and is looking anxious as he hits the parking lot and runs straight past my car.

He glances at me, raising his hand to obviously thank me for letting him pass. Then he does a double take and spins to gape at me, the bag slipping from his fingers and thumping onto the ground.

"Baxter." I breathe his name more than say it, but as soon as the word has left my mouth, Kai sits up in his seat, straining to see out the window.

With a little gasp, he frantically unbuckles and jumps out the back door.

"Kai, wa—" But then my voice is lost as I watch my little man race toward the towering hockey player with his arms outstretched.

Baxter crouches down, catching him in a flying hug and scooping him against his chest.

Kai's little arms wrap around his neck, and Baxter cradles the back of his head, smiling at whatever my son is saying to him.

It's a gentle smile, soft and beautiful… and then his eyes land on me, and I forget how to breathe.

My heart is pounding as I turn off the engine and slowly step out of the car.

"What are you doing here?" I grip the door, needing it to help me stand.

His gaze softens even more as he drinks me in and rasps, "I was coming to find you."

"What?"

"I was coming to get you." He pulls in a breath, trying to lean away from Kai, who is refusing to let him go. He quietly laughs and rubs my son's back before looking at me again. "I've let you walk out of my life so many times already. And I know you're married." He winces. "And maybe I shouldn't be saying this, but Tammy… if this marriage is hurting you, you need to leave him." He blows out a breath, his gaze taking on a sharp clarity as his voice rises with confidence. "You need to leave him… and you need to be with me."

My lips part, and for some reason, my voice has stopped working.

Maybe it's because my heart is lodged in my throat right now.

"I know I can't offer you vast amounts of wealth. I can't buy you a nice car or a big house. But I can love you. And I can protect you, and make you laugh… and play games with you." He winks, his smile a mixture of sexy and adorable before his expression turns to one of pure sincerity. "I'll listen to whatever you want to tell me, and I'll hear you." His eyes start to glisten. "I'll see you, Tammy. Every day, I'll see you and appreciate you."

It's impossible to fight my tears as his words soak into me. Like rain on parched soil, I can feel them filling me up from the inside.

"Please, choose me. I'll be the best partner and stepfather I can. I'll look after you guys. And I'll love you with everything I've got."

Covering my mouth, I try to hold back the sob that's rattling my insides. My stomach is jerking, and I'm still fighting for air.

Baxter moves around the car, his large arm enveloping me as he kisses the top of my head.

"It's okay," he whispers when Kai starts to cry too.

I sniff, pulling myself together and rubbing Kai's back. He turns his head, resting it against Baxter's shoulders and looking at me with his worried, tear-filled eyes.

"Mommy's okay, Kai. These are happy tears. Promise."

He swallows, his little lips quivering as he sits back and stares down at me.

I swipe the tears off my cheeks, my smile growing as I let out a shaky breath. Wrapping my arm around Baxter's waist, I nestle against him, then pull Kai toward me for a group hug. His little arm squeezes my neck tight, and I start to laugh as my face gets squished between my boy and a wall of muscle.

"Okay, okay." I pull back, keeping my hand on Kai's arm as I look up at Baxter. "You're not going to push me away when things get hard, are you?"

"Never," he whispers, pain flittering over his expression. "I will never do that to you again."

"Good." I sniff and nod. "Because I love you."

The words are so simple, yet so true.

And the look on Baxter's face is one I want to remember for the rest of my life. His lips part, this awestruck surprise taking over his expression.

"I love you," I say again, laughing as I rise on my tiptoes and kiss his perfect lips.

It takes him a second to respond, and then he's all in, gripping the back of my head and holding me against him, prolonging our kiss until Kai quietly asks, "Are you guys nearly done?"

The question makes me laugh into Baxter's mouth. He joins me, and then Kai starts to giggle, though he probably doesn't know why.

A horn beeps behind us and I flinch, whipping around to notice a car has just pulled into the lot.

"Sorry!" I raise my hand in apology and quickly get behind the wheel, pulling into the closest parking space.

Baxter is still carrying Kai and walks around to open the door for me.

I climb out, rubbing my forehead and glancing over my shoulder at the reception sign. "Have you checked out already?"

When Baxter doesn't respond, I turn to glance at him, and he shakes his head. "I was about to." His eyebrows dip. "I was going to drive to Chesterfield and…" He shakes his head. "What are you doing here?"

"I've been up all night, and I really need some sleep."

"No." He cups my face with a gentle grin. "I mean, why aren't you… home?"

My eyes burn, my voice wobbling out the words. "Because it's not my home anymore." I glance at Kai, who's staring at me like he's worried I'll change my mind. Giving him a brave smile, I lightly squeeze his leg and look back up at Baxter. "We were on our way to Nolan, actually. I'm hoping there's still a spare bed at Ponderosa?"

Baxter's smile could power a city right now.

I laugh, leaning against him when he pulls me into a tight hug. "There'll always be a place for you. I'll never let you go again," he whispers into my ear, and my chest sizzles with that promise, hope starting to bloom as all the dried-up deadness inside me starts to blossom with fresh life.