1. Tammy

CHAPTER 1

TAMMY

I can't wait to get home.

Ugh. After an entire week in Gladstone, anyone in their right mind would be eager to leave that place in their rearview mirror.

I grip the wheel, feeling bad for thinking it. Some of my friends still live in Gladstone. It was nice to see Grace. She's a sweetheart and probably the least gossipy person in my hometown, but…

I've moved on. I never thought it'd be possible, but it turns out that three years of living in the city was enough to make me realize just how small Gladstone is. Just how narrow-minded and stuck in their ways they are.

It's like taking a trip back to the 1950s, and every time I visit, I always drive past that green sign with the yellow writing that says Gladstone—Population 512—Mighty glad to be here with a nostalgic smile.

And within an hour of being back, my smile is gone, and I'm inhaling air that's more like toxic gas, forcing pleasant smiles I don't feel, nodding at statements I don't agree with, and wishing to be anywhere else.

My parents are pissed that I bailed early.

I made up an excuse about Hudson needing me home. Mom bought it in a heartbeat, because apparently that's what good little wives do. They drop everything to be at their husband's beck and call.

My stomach knots, and I glance in the rearview mirror, checking on Kai. My precious boy is sleeping in his booster seat, looking angelic as ever. Because he is. Even when he's awake, he's an angel. My little shadow.

I smile, my heart melting in my chest. He's the only reason I survive places like Gladstone. He's the only reason I go back to visit. I can't deny my parents or my in-laws access to their grandchild… even if I do spend the entire time trying to justify why they don't have any more grandchildren yet.

"Kai's four now, Tamara. If you wait too long, the gap will be huge, and then they won't get along. You want them to be friends, don't you?"

I nearly bit back, "Oh, you mean like Karan and me?" I barely speak to my sister these days. And even when we lived in the same house, we didn't get along. We were like aliens to each other. We had nothing in common, and it still surprises me that we came from the same parents. She's a year older and left for college the minute she could. She'd always had her eyes set on the highway out of town, and she never looked back. She left before the summer was even done.

Left before I met Hudson.

Before he knocked me up… and then put a ring on my finger.

She was so disgusted by the fact that I was getting married at eighteen, she refused to come back for the wedding.

My parents haven't spoken to her since… I don't think.

That's probably why all the pressure's on me. I'm the good girl. The one who does what she's told. I'm their only path to more grandbabies, so why the hell am I not popping them out faster?

Gritting my teeth, I sniff and focus on the long stretch of highway.

Truth is, I can't bring myself to try for more. Hudson is so busy at work. Ever since we made the big shift to the city, he's been on a mission to prove himself and bring home the bacon. He got a job working for his uncle's company. Because we were such young parents, we both skipped college, and he worked for his dad in Gladstone for a year—had to pay the bills somehow, right? Then he got offered this chance in the city, and he took it. He didn't even ask me, just came home one night all excited. I didn't fight him on it, because I was suffocating, and the out sounded good.

But it wasn't as easy as I thought it'd be. City life is so different, and I suffered culture shock for the first year as I tried to navigate my way with a one-year-old on my hip. We survived somehow and found a happy rhythm. Hudson worked his ass off, rising through the ranks with speed and constantly striving for more.

He seems to thrive in the business world. He comes home electrified and talking about investments that I don't understand. Something to do with stocks and bonds. It's a foreign language, but I nod and smile anyway while he eats his dinner. Then he leaves me to it, disappearing back into his office to deal with client phone calls. His laughter is muffled by the walls between us, and all I can do is gaze at Kai and wonder if his father will ever ask him how his day was.

"That's why, Mom," I murmur. "That's why I'm not popping out babies. Because I'm raising the one I've already got by myself. And the guy who can give me another one doesn't seem to mind the sex… but I don't think he'd be too happy if I stopped taking the pill."

Changing lanes, I glance to the west, my lips turning upward at the stunning sunset. The sky is drenched in gold and amber tonight, and I wish I could stay out in it, but our exit is coming up, and I need to get Kai home to bed.

I should text Hudson and let him know we're on our way back. He'd probably appreciate the warning, but it's not like he'll be having a raging party or anything. He's not like that anymore. He's not the party-loving senior I first fell for. He's serious now. A businessman. And businessmen don't play silly games or do silly dances. They wear expensive suits and talk about politics and market capitalization.

He'll no doubt be watching a game while drinking his bourbon. Maybe he'll have his feet up, but his laptop will be open, and he won't be able to help himself—working away while he "relaxes."

I snort and shake my head. The guy is addicted. But I guess I should be grateful that he brings in the bucks. We live in a gorgeous two-story house. I never have to worry about money—budgeting for groceries and taking a calculator to the supermarket like my mother used to. I drive a nice SUV that's only a few years old. I can buy whatever clothes I want, and Kai has the best of everything.

It's a good life.

I love being a mom, and sure, Kai starts full-time kindergarten next year and I have no idea how I'm gonna fill my days, but I won't start worrying about that yet.

Right now, I just want to get my boy home, shake off Hell Week in Gladstone, and enjoy a glass of wine with my man.

Thirty minutes later, I'm turning left onto my suburban street. The houses are all the same—like the developer couldn't be bothered coming up with anything original and just built a bunch of Lego replicas one after the other. I pull into my driveway, the garage door opening smoothly before I glide into my spot. Hudson's Audi R8 is in its usual place, which means he's home. I was expecting him to be, being Saturday night and all, but it's still nice to know he's not at the office for a change.

Kai's still in dreamland, so I leave him be, slipping into the house to make sure his bed is all set up. Hopefully, I can make it a smooth transition for him.

Slipping off my shoes, I pad into the house, ascending the carpeted steps and veering right when I hear the shower running. I'll say a quick hi to Hudson so I don't scare the crap out of him when he turns off the water and hears movement in the house.

I glance at our unmade bed, the sheets a tousled mess, and roll my eyes. Of course he wasn't going to make it while I was gone. That's a woman's job, right?

He'd never actually say it, but I know he's thinking it. He grew up in the same kind of house I did. Women did all the domestic chores while the men went out and worked. Honestly, I thought we were done with that bullshit, but I've gone and slipped right into this life without argument.

Because I was young and pregnant, and I didn't know what the hell else to do.

Closing my eyes, I draw in a calming breath.

You have a good life here, Tammy. He provides for you. He could have left you with a kid, but he married you, and you need to be grateful for that. Everything you need is in this house.

I repeat my usual mantra as I walk toward our en suite.

My fingers are just touching the door to push it open when I hear a moan. At first I think it's Hudson. Is he masturbating in the shower? The thought makes my lips quirk, and for a second, I wonder if I should join him… but then I hear that moan again…

And that is not a man.

"What?" I whisper, pushing the door open and assaulting my senses.

The glass might be steamed up, but I can see enough.

Painted nails, hands splayed on the tiles, boobs bouncing back and forth… my husband's hands gripping her hips as he thrusts into her from behind.

"Yes, baby," she gasps, more pornographic noises popping out of her mouth as he grunts and glides his hands up her body, pinching her nipple, then squeezing her breast.

She bites her bottom lip, tipping her head as he grunts again, his ass cheeks smushing up against the glass. I stare at them—so taut and muscular. How many times have I held those in my hands, dug my fingers into them as he thrust into me. I thought those grunts of pleasure were mine and mine alone.

But obviously not.

A sick bile swirls in my stomach, my chest starting to hurt as I stand there watching my husband and whoever the hell she is.

I need to go. To flee. To stop staring at this. But I'm frozen in shock.

Hudson's cheating on me.

He's—

The woman's eyes pop open, and she lets out a strangled gasp when she spots me gaping at them.

That's what I'm doing.

Gaping. My mouth seems incapable of closing. I definitely can't speak.

All I can do is stare.

The shower clunks off, and Hudson spins around, his dick still standing to attention, her juices coating the hard shaft.

Her juices.

Not mine.

Hers.

"Tam." He chokes out my name, and it jolts me out of my stupor.

The shower door swings open, and I blink at him, then do the only thing I can.

Spinning on my heel, I bolt out of the room.

"Tamara!" Hudson shouts after me, but I keep going, thundering down the stairs and back out to the car.

I forget my shoes, but like hell I'm going back for them.

Kai's still mercifully asleep, blissfully unaware of the shit show unfolding around him.

Pushing the button, I start the engine, begging the garage door to open faster as I hear my name once more.

"Tamara!" Hudson bolts into the garage, a towel clutched around his waist. Droplets cascade down his body. A body I've licked and kissed and made my own.

But it's not just mine anymore.

I can't even look at him.

Turning with a growl, I fire out of the garage, my tires screeching when I hit the road and make a quick turn, accelerating away with a fury I've never felt before.