Chapter 10

Chapter

Ten

"You have a pack."

Horror coated my voice and tongue. The sweetness from each kiss we shared quickly transitioned to something sickly and bitter.

Cal had a pack. He had a whole pack that bit him, bonded him.

And it didn"t seem like that was the only bite he had hidden on his body meaning that he didn"t just have one alpha.

He had alphas. Plural.

They could feel what he was feeling right now if they wanted. If they cared to listen in.

Oh my god. They could tell probably that I was with him- kissing him. Touching him.

I really didn't know how bonds worked exactly, but it didn't matter. I read the romance novels. I read the textbooks, and bonding was an intimate connection. A contract. Not only that, but bonding was until death.

DANGER. DANGER.

Cal"s dark eyebrows furrowed as I stuttered my revelation. "I do."

"You have a pack." I couldn't help but say it again as I still held onto his shirt. Clenching him to me.

I shoved myself away from him though there wasn't much of anywhere to go in the cab of the car.

Hands that once smoothed down my skin, causing sounds to escape my throat I didn"t even know I could make from a silly little kiss, grasped at the air between us as if he immediately felt the loss.

His expression shuttered.

"And the people you work for are..." I was putting it all together now. I just can't believe I didn't even question it all night when he was talking about roommates and good friends.

They weren"t just BFFs. They were a pack.

I was such an idiot.

"My pack. That's right."

"Why didn't you say anything? They can't be happy that you are out and with me of all people. They probably know now and are angry." Because that was another thing I knew. Alphas rarely shared.

Alphas were strong and couldn"t control themselves when high emotions set in, like jealousy. Like when they thought someone was encroaching on something that was theirs.

"You of all people?" Cal chuckled, reaching back for my hands.

I felt exactly what he must've been feeling, the pulsating need between us the moment he leaned in for that kiss. The most amazing kiss ever.

Even if I hadn't had much experience. I could tell that.

I balled my fingers into fists so that I wouldn't give in.

All I wanted was to crawl over the center console and give in to him. All of him.

All the stress and tension that slowly melted off of me in the past few hours was rebounding. I glanced out the front window as if the alphas could show up at any moment.

"It's okay, Ella." Cal"s voice remained soothing, but it wasn"t doing whatever he hoped it would. "They know."

"What do you mean, they know."

"I mean that we have a sort of open understanding," assured Cal. "They're a good pack. They aren't like that."

Like that. Like the awful sadistic misogynists who thought that any person and thing belonged to them. That was basically why they had packs. It wasn't just to make some happy alpha-centric family.

They had a claim. A bond, proven by the fact Cal had someone's teeth marks permanently scarred into his flesh.

They took and took and rarely gave back to anyone even the people they said they loved or called pack. They were cruel and inattentive.

I forced myself to remind myself of the narrative I'd been told to stay safe. To stay away from anything like this. This danger.

Cal watched as I struggled. "I just didn't tell you right away because I know it's a lot."

"It is a lot," I whispered.

He visibly deflated. "I should've told you earlier. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. We were having such a good time and...."

"And?"

"I wanted to keep you all to myself for a little while," he said.

"But they know that you are out... with me?"

Cal nodded quickly, making sure that I understood. At least he hadn't been lying to everyone.

"Yeah, they know. We're a good group of guys. I'm sure they'd love to meet you too," he said.

"But they're all..." I still couldn't quite wrap my mind around this.

"Alphas?" Cal nodded, before narrowing his eyes at me. "Aside from me, yeah. Are alphas bad?"

"No, of course not." I managed not to give away any emotion one way or the other. At least that was something.

Because no, alphas weren't bad exactly. Not always.

But they could be.

That's what made them dangerous. I stayed away from danger for too long to let anything slip by me now.

I needed to stay away. I needed to get away from Cal even as it made emotion climb in my chest.

"I can see you're upset," said Cal. "I really am sorry. I knew it was a big deal but I kind of thought that if you liked me... It's not like you'd even need to know the rest of the guys if you"re uncomfortable with it. It could stay this way. You and me."

"I'm fine," I said. "I just should head inside. I still have a lot of work to do over the weekend. I'm tired."

Slowly, Cal nodded, though his head dipped a little in what looked like defeat. "Okay."

"Thank you again, for tonight. I had a really good time." I had the best time in a long time.

"Let me walk you in. Please? No expectation. I just want to make sure that you're okay," I said.

"My place is right there." I waved towards one of the old houses that lined the road. "I'm good. Thanks."

"Call me later, Ella. Please? I want to make this right. I"ll answer any questions you have."

I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I wasn't sure what I should do. None of this made sense. I could hardly comprehend the fact that I was out at night and on a date with a genuinely nice guy, let alone that he had a pack.

Everything I reminded myself hinged on the fact that people in packs and who spent a lot of time around most alphas were... Well, they weren't the people I needed nor could be around.

But I really wanted to be around Cal.

"Ella?"

"I'll call you, Cal. Promise."

I shut the door and made sure to bolt the three different locks behind me. I stepped out of a dream and now I was back in the dull, damp reality.

"Oh my god!" Rita squealed from where she was on the couch, papers spread around her laptop. "How did it go? You must tell me. I peeked out the window. He looked so cute!"

I dropped the tote I had been carrying ever since work on the floor. I shook my head.

I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes, shaking my head over and over again.

"Oh no. Oh no no no," said Rita. I could hear her rushing to stand up to make her way over to me. "It's okay. What happened? I'm going to go and beat that asshole up right now if he's still out there."

"No. Don't. It's fine."

I was not going to cry. I would not cry.

There was no point in crying This wasn't supposed to mean anything today anyway, logically. It was supposed to be fun. It was supposed to be a change of pace and to let Rita be proud of me for stepping out of my comfort zone.

I wasn't supposed to be so invested after a single date with a guy who was not the person I thought he was.

Not exactly anyway.

I thought he had roommates. Roommates. He did. A whole pack of them. A pack he was a part of.

"It isn't fine," said Rita. "What happened?"

I didn't know much about him before tonight to begin with. But now I did. I knew that Cal was sweet and funny. I knew that he had a terrible mouth that likely got him into more trouble than he let on as a kid and now.

I knew that before I felt that bite mark on his side, I never wanted the night to end.

He said that we could just keep it this way. Me and him. That made no sense either though.

None of this was making any sense.

"Seriously, Ella, talk. You're starting to scare me."

"He has a pack," I choked out.

Rita gasped. "You're kidding."

I shook my head. "No. He has a pack with bite marks and everything."

"Oh, Ella."

See? Even she knew it was bad. I moved away from her and started to pace.

"What happened?" she asked.

"We went out roller skating."

"You roller skated?" My friend sounded the most shocked about this over everything else.

"I was awful, but yes. I ate nachos. It was great. He kissed me."

"Wow." She sounded more than shocked. "Look at you go."

"I know. That's when I found out. I was touching him and..." I felt it. I could still feel the indents of whoever bit him, bonded him, under my fingertips.

It made me itch and shiver at the same time, imagining just how it must"ve felt for someone to sink their teeth into smooth skin.

"He has a pack, Rita. He's in a pack."

"Wait. What?"

I waited for her to catch up.

"He's in a pack? A pack with alphas? I thought you said he was a beta."

I did.

"I just don't understand. If he had a pack, how was he going out with you?" Rita asked.

"He said they had some sort of agreement. They knew he was going out with me on a date." Honestly, maybe I should've been paying closer attention to all that Cal said during my panic.

"Maybe they are just a group of guys in the pack who have an open relationship deal. Not all of them are romantically involved with each other, though that would be hot."

I hadn"t thought of that. "I don't know."

"You don't think..." Rita trailed off.

"What, Rita?" What didn't I think?

"Nothing," she said, calmly. "Just my mind getting ahead of me. There is no way that he could know that you're... ya know."

For the first time in a while, I was sure. "No, definitely not. I just got my new suppressants and blockers today. I made sure that I took enough before going out and it wasn't like he'd been around me for that long before.

"Plus, you said he's a beta, right?"

"Right." I put a hand to my head. "I'm just..."

Rita inhaled, knowingly. "You don't want to leave this go."

I didn't say anything. That was an answer enough. I should leave this go. I should never call Cal back like I promised. I should pretend I never met him and go on with my life. "I should call it a day and just say that I got this dating thing out of my system."

"You don't have to, you know. You could go out again," said Rita. "Take things slow. Have fun."

"And then what? What happens when I get attacked? He has a pack," I reminded her.

I needed to remind myself. Over and over and over again if I had to.

He has a pack. A pack of alphas. He has a pack.

"But it was nice, wasn't it? He treated you well and you had a good time?

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes thinking about the way I couldn't help but smile and the way he called me beautiful.

By the end of the night, I started to believe it.

Whether or not it was the smart thing to do.

Ugh, this was all so complicated.

I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes to blot everything else out but the truth.

"Yes. I did."