3. Courtney

Chapter 3

Courtney

I t’s later than I wanted, but I’ve just gotten Joey into bed. He was so excited to know his dad was in town and fought bedtime for thirty minutes longer than usual. I really needed those thirty minutes to myself too, so finally having him asleep is a godsend. I just settled onto my couch with a cup of tea, my Christmas tree is lit, and the outside lights on the deck highlight the flurries that are still falling.

My phone rings and I see Jack Fristoni flashing across the top. Every time I see his name, it catches me off guard. I used to get butterflies when he called. Now my stomach just turns with regret and anxiety. For two rings, I debate whether I want to answer his call or not, but he’ll just call back until I do. Him showing up earlier than expected has completely thrown me off my game. I know I should be happy he’s putting forth the effort for Joey, but at the same time, I know he’s only here early because of business, not because he misses his son.

When January and her family lost their dad unexpectedly, when she and I were barely eighteen, it shook the town. When she said she was leaving, Jack and I made plans to go with her. We had always dreamed about running away from here, and if anyone could do it with me, he could. And when January said she was ready, the three of us left and didn’t stop until we ended up in New York City, grossly unprepared and unsuspecting of how the world really was. We partied and fell into a rough crowd, but after coming from little ol’ Montana, where the summers are hot and dry, the winters are cold and wet, and the nightlife is almost non-existent, we fell in love with the change of pace.

The party scene was amazing and like nothing we’d ever seen before, and when her older brother, Lief, called to ask when we were coming home, we told him we weren’t. He came to find us and ended up staying too, recovering from his own heartbreaks in life.

Lief and Jack were always good friends in high school, and I thought my life was going to be amazing. I thought it was the greatest thing in the world having my boyfriend, my best friend, and her brother all with me in the city. We were going to start a new life.

How wrong I was.

After just a few months, Lief wanted to go back home. He was worried about their two younger sisters and their mom. He and January fought over her abandoning the family, and in the end, Lief went home and she stayed.

Jack, who had been taking classes in finance, stepped up. He met a few guys that were willing to take a risk on a young kid who had nothing but a sincere passion for work. A year later, he was able to come in as a shared investor, and he and his partner offered a lot of help to the Nilsson family. They have a boutique in town called Dress Me Up that has been a family business for years. When their dad died, Lief and January were expected to step up and run it. But with January in New York and Lief without experience, it quickly fell into the red.

Jack and his senior partner loaned them a lot of money, and basically Lief Nilsson was indebted to Jack for life. January was furious when she found out. She was mad at Lief for not consulting her, then mad at Jack for what felt like him going behind her back, even though she had essentially washed her hands of the store. She had big emotions she was dealing with at the time, and it was easier to be mad than to actually deal with the loss. Jack explained it wasn’t his place to tell January, Lief should have done that, but she wouldn't see reason. I couldn't blame her either. Even though she wasn’t there, she felt responsible for the debt too. After a big blowout with both her brother and Jack, she essentially cut ties with them both. I was stuck between them, and I definitely did not want to get wrapped up in the family drama.

But then Jack abandoned them like he abandoned me. He took on numerous large accounts that I wasn't sure he was ready for and which required a ton of attention, and he let Lief linger in the background. According to Jack, he did what Lief asked of him, but he wasn’t helping him manage the money and it wasn’t enough.

No one in the Nilsson family knew how to run a business, and when they couldn’t count on Jack, things got dicey.

A few years later, I found out Lief and Jack made amends, but I don’t know why it was so easy for Lief to accept him back. Maybe it’s because they don’t share a son together or a love that once was.

Another ring from the phone draws me back to the present, and I answer, “Hello? ”

“Courtney.”

“Jack, what can I do for you?”

“I was wondering if I could come over tomorrow and bring dinner for Joey. And you. We all need to eat, right?”

I hesitate before giving an answer. These little glimpses take me right back to where we used to be. Even the tone of his voice is taking me back ten years. And I want to say yes and shout it from the rooftops, but I have to stay grounded in my present. This will be just another passing visit for him. I don’t know if it’s Christmas season making him feel nostalgic or if he’s honestly trying to be better for Joey. He called me last month and asked if it would be okay to bring Joey back to New York with him for the week between Christmas and New Year’s. Fear shot through me immediately because one, I don’t want to be without my son, but two, I wondered if he would take him and not bring him back. So showing up early has me on alert. I can’t imagine he would do that because he would not be able to take care of him while he’s working. But it’s always a concern.

“Dinner? Are you sure this is a good idea?”

He grumbles something about not knowing anything anymore, and I’m pretty sure I wasn’t supposed to hear that.

“Excuse me?”

He clears his throat, “Like I said, we all have to eat. I would like to spend some time with my son, Courtney. Please allow me the chance to do that.”

“You’ve had six years to do that. Why the change now?”

I hear him huff a laugh on the other end and prepare for the fight that is coming. Like every time we talk, he pushes and I push back, and we end up in a screaming match that solves nothing. Just more animosity and more reason that my leaving him was the right decision. But this time, he again catches me off guard.

“I know I haven’t done right by him, or you, but I’m trying here. I don’t know how to do this. I just know I want to see him.”

I’m shocked into silence hearing his words, and my heart beats loudly in my chest with hope for my son. Because, in the end, it’s not about Jack and me, it's about Jack and Joey. And Joey needs him.

“Okay,” I whisper. "You can come for dinner. We don’t get home until after five, so give me a little time. He also goes to bed at eight so please don’t show up right before that.”

Please just show up is what I want to say.

His voice perks up. “I’ll be there at six. Is there anything he can't eat?” he asks quietly, and it’s just another reminder that he basically does not know his son at all.

“He's allergic to strawberries. But other than that, you’re fine.”

“Like me,” he breathes out in wonder.

“Yes, Jack, just like you.”

He sighs. “Strawberries. Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow. Thanks, Coco.” He clicks off his end of the call, and my head spins at hearing the nickname he used to call me.