Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Layla

I hadn’t noticed the appointment on my calendar until after lunch.

“Hey, Peggy.” I buzzed through the telephone intercom to my assistant. “Did you just add the appointment at four o’clock today?”

“I added it this morning. Mr. Westbrook called and asked if you could squeeze him in as the last appointment of the day. You were on the phone, so I didn’t clear it with you. But nothing was on your calendar. Do you need me to change it?”

“No. It’s fine. I just thought maybe I’d missed it there. Thank you.”

Gray and I hadn’t seen each other in a few days. He’d been spending time with his daughter, and I’d kept myself busy with what I did best—working fifteen hours a day. I missed him, but things were a lot more complicated than just having a boyfriend now.

A part of me had thought I could step back from where we were in our relationship, but the more we were apart, the more I realized there was no going back to casual and taking things slow—not that Gray and I had ever really done casual. We’d had that special connection from the very first time we’d met.

When we’d talked on the phone last night, he hadn’t mentioned he needed to speak to me about work, so I took out my phone to text him and see if everything was okay. But as I did that, my office phone rang, and I was summoned to one of the partner’s offices to discuss a new case. It was typical for associates to have to drop what they were doing and spend a few hours in a partner’s office when they felt like it. They didn’t exactly feel the need to schedule time when it might be convenient for everyone. Hence, the reason I’m on a first-name basis with the security guards who lock up the building. Whatever a partner needed just piled on top of whatever I needed to get done.

I didn’t get back to my desk until just before four o’clock. I’d been fighting a futile attempt to not check the time every few minutes during my meeting. Peggy buzzed before I could even finish putting on a fresh coat of lipstick.

“Your four o’clock is here.”

“You can send him in.”

I stuffed my purse into my desk drawer and folded my hands on my lap, waiting for Gray. My heart sped up hearing his footsteps come down the hall. He definitely had a distinct stride—and he was walking at a fast, no-bullshit pace.

He came through my door with a cocky, devious smile. Stopping to look at me as he stepped into my office, he said not a word. I stayed quiet as well, but damn if my body didn’t say a lot. My nipples pebbled, the hair on my arms stood up, and my pulse started to race. I shifted in my seat, and the light in Gray’s eyes flared.

He closed the door behind him and very slowly clicked the lock shut.

When he turned back around, I raised a brow. “Is our business so sensitive that my door needs to be locked?”

Gray wore a dark, three-piece suit, the kind that fit him in all the right places and made his already confident persona shoot up tenfold. His tie was a beautiful blue color that would have normally reflected the color of his eyes, only they were darkening right in front of me.

“If it were up to me, I’d leave the door open while I make you come. In fact, I’d prefer if the office heard it. But I thought you’d rather have privacy.”

God, he was so arrogant. And I loved it. I so, so loved it.

I folded my arms over my chest. “Pretty sure of yourself, aren’t you?”

“That I can make you come? Absolutely.”

“I wasn’t referring to that. I was referring to the fact that you think I’d let you try, in the middle of the day, in my office.”

He smirked. That smirk.

I braced as he walked toward me. Grabbing one arm of my high-back chair, he swung it around and then surprised me by lifting my ass out of it and up onto my desk. He raised a knee and used it to spread my legs, then pushed his hips between them as he pressed a kiss to my jaw. “I missed you.”

His voice alone could make me wet. In fact, it might have. “Did you come to…” I trailed off as his mouth moved to my throat. “Did you come to see me about business?”

He kissed his way up to my ear. “I came to make you come.”

One of his hands slipped between us and under my skirt—easy access. I felt my face heat as I let him rub up and down the silk of my panties. I should not be doing this. Yet I did nothing to stop it from happening.

“We shouldn’t.” A feeble attempt, at best.

Fingers slipped under the silk of my underwear. “Are you sure?” He found my clit and started to massage it. “You’re already wet. I can make it quick.”

Before I found words to respond, one finger slid inside of me.

My eyes shut, and I swallowed whatever answer I’d been about to give. I couldn’t even remember what that was. He gently pumped in and out a few times, then pulled out and thrust back in with two fingers. I moaned, and he silenced me with a kiss.

“Shhh. I wanted to lick you first, but I don’t want you to get in trouble. So we’ll have to do it this way before I taste you so you’re more relaxed.”

His hand went to work. Curling his fingers inside me just right to rub that sensitive spot, he relentlessly pushed in and out. The man had magnificent fingers. Not three minutes ago, I’d been steadfast that we were playing a cat-and-mouse game, and I was never going to fool around with him in my office in the middle of the day. Now I was propped up on my desk, stretching the material of my skirt as I tried to open my legs wider, and shamelessly moaning into his mouth.

“That’s it. Come for me, baby. I can’t wait to lick you clean.”

At that moment, I honestly didn’t give a shit how reckless I was, the climb had begun, and all I could do was hang on and wait until I was on the other side. Gray’s hand—the one that wasn’t busy working miracles—threaded into my hair and tugged my head back so we were nose to nose. “I want to watch you come. Show me, beautiful. Show me.”

His thumb pressed firmly onto my clit, and everything inside of me coiled. It felt like I might explode if I didn’t release. Sensing my desperation, Gray thrust in and out harder and faster, pushing me over the edge. I gripped my desk for dear life and hung on as I rode the pulsating waves of pleasure. Gray’s intense eyes watching me came in and out of focus as it crested. Our gazes locked; I couldn’t have looked away if I’d wanted to.

On my way down, he tugged at the hem of my skirt and lifted my ass so he could push the fabric up to my waist. Still in a complete fog, I had no idea what he was doing—only that the exposed cheeks of my ass were now sitting on the cool top of my wooden desk. Gray dropped to his knees and began sucking on my swollen bud. My body roared back to life. I had been ready to snuggle and nap, but one lash of his tongue had me realizing the party was just getting started.

Giving in completely, I lay back on my desk and reveled in the feel of his tongue flicking and sucking, penetrating and promising. When my orgasm hit, I wasn’t sure if it was a second one or if the first had just ebbed until it had enough strength to form the next big wave.

Gray didn’t stop until I was boneless. Spent, I looked up at the ceiling, catching my breath as he slipped off my panties and righted my skirt. Then he scooped me up into his arms, took a seat in my chair, and plopped me onto his lap. My head was spinning.

Gray kissed my forehead. “This has been a productive meeting. You’re very efficient. I’m glad I stopped by.”

“I’d say something witty, but I don’t think my brain is functioning yet.”

He chuckled. “That’s good. Because I figured it’s been working overtime and needed the break.”

I leaned my head against his chest. “I have been working a lot.”

“I was referring to your brain overthinking everything when it came to us.”

“Oh.”

A few minutes later, Gray said, “I hate to eat and run, but I actually do have an appointment with an attorney across town in a half hour—the attorney for the company we’re investing in. Apparently he’s an old friend of my father’s.”

“I’m glad you said old and he…considering how you just treated this attorney when you waltzed into her office.”

Gray lifted me from his lap and settled my ass back on my chair. He kissed my lips. “I’m seeing Ella tomorrow afternoon. Picking her up at noon and taking her out for the first time alone. I’d love you to come with me?”

“I don’t know, Gray. Maybe you should do that on your own if it’s the first time.”

He searched my eyes. “I want you to get to know her.”

“I’m…I will. I’m just…not yet.”

He nodded and forced a smile, but I knew I’d hurt him. “Okay. Dinner tomorrow night, then?”

“Sounds good.”

***

Guilt had kept me tossing and turning all night. Saturday morning I’d gotten up extra early to work from home, but I couldn’t concentrate. The memory of Gray’s smile when he’d asked me to spend the afternoon with his daughter—and the way I’d made it fall when I told him I wasn’t ready for that—was haunting me.

I tossed the pen on the dining room table and sat back in my chair. It’s an afternoon with a little girl? I spent time with Quinn’s daughter, Harper, all the time. Why was I making such a big deal out of it?

Because I never wondered if Quinn was going to be in my life forever, that’s why. Growing up the way I did, I’d learned that kids need consistency. Popping in and out of their lives sends a message that you can’t undo with words—you aren’t my priority. So I hesitated to take that step now.

But what if I took a child out of the picture? I was crazy about Gray in a way that I’d never experienced with a man. Something inside of me just knew what we had was something special—and that scared the living crap out of me. So, was it Gray who was moving too fast? Was it getting to know Ella and both of us growing attached? Or was I just avoiding jumping in with both feet, even though I had no doubts about the way I felt, because I was afraid to get hurt again?

Damn it.

I’m such an idiot.

I picked up my phone to call Gray and realized it was already eleven thirty.

While it rang, I ran into my bedroom and stole a glance in the mirror.

Pretty scary.

He answered as I pulled the tie from my hair with my cell cradled between my shoulder and ear.

“Hey, beautiful.” He sounded genuinely happy to hear my voice. It confirmed I’d finally made the right decision.

“Are you on your way to Ella’s?”

“I am.”

“If the invitation is still open, I’d like to come.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Well, I’d love that. We just crossed the bridge to Brooklyn, but I can turn around.”

“No, that’s okay.” I hopped on one foot while taking off my sweatpants. “I’ll meet you there. It’ll be quicker. I’ll just grab a cab. I don’t want you to be late.”

“We can turn around and get you. It won’t make me that late.”

“No, Ella is expecting you. Text me the address. I’ll meet you there as quick as I can.”

He laughed. “Okay, crazy girl. Whatever you say.”

***

My cab pulled up in front of Max’s house at eight minutes after twelve. Gray exited his usual town car as I jumped out. I must’ve looked frantic.

“I’m sorry I’m late.”

“Don’t be.” He cupped my cheeks. “I’m just glad you decided to come.”

I exhaled and held his wrists. “Me too.”

He leaned in and placed a soft kiss on my lips. “It means a lot to me.”

I knew it did. “We’re late.”

“Max kept me waiting around for three full years. I think she can handle a few minutes delay.”

I smiled. “That’s true.”

Gray held out his hand to me, and I put mine in his to walk to the door. “This is a really nice neighborhood. I love old brownstones.”

“She bought it with the money she stole from me.”

“Shit. That sucks. Sorry.”

Gray rang the bell, and a minute later, Max opened the door. Her smile faded as soon as she saw he wasn’t alone. I wasn’t sure what she had against me, but clearly she wasn’t happy I’d come along.

“I didn’t realize you’d be bringing someone for your visit with Ella.”

“Not someone,” he said with a stern tone. “Layla. I’m sure you remember her from when you sandbagged her in her office.”

Max forced a smile and pulled her cardigan sweater closed. “Come on in. Ella is washing up.”

Luckily, we didn’t have to stand around and make nice. Ella came flying down the hall wearing an enormous smile. “Gray!”

She stopped in front of him and signed something.

Her excitement must’ve been contagious—I found myself smiling as wide as she was, even though I had no idea what the heck was going on.

Gray shocked me by signing something back. His performance earned a clap and squeal from Ella. “You ’membered!”

Her mother corrected her. “It’s remembered, Ella.”

Gray turned to me. “It’s Saturday.” He pulled on the material of his pale green polo and then began to sign. “Saturday. Sage.”

It hit me that the two of them were wearing the same shade of sage green. Ella had on a light green T-shirt.

I wrinkled my brow with a curious smile. “I didn’t realize the days of the week were color-coded.”

Ella tugged at Gray’s shirt and asked him to help her get her new stroller from the closet, which left me standing alone with Max.

She didn’t even pretend to smile. Instead, she started right in. “It’ll be a lot to handle soon, stepping into the shoes of a dead woman whose child is devastated.”

My mouth opened and stayed that way. I’d been expecting her to be a bitch, but Jesus…really? What the hell did I say to that? I stayed quiet because she’d rendered me speechless, not out of respect to her.

She figured she’d continue since I was, apparently, all ears. “She needs to bond with her father. Don’t interrupt that to play house. If you’re not going to be a mother to her, let them be. A loss from a breakup is no less than a loss from a death to a child. You’ll devastate her when you decide to walk away.”

Gray and Ella walked back, smiling. He took one look at me, and his smile faded. “Everything okay?”

Max answered. “We were just discussing my prognosis.”

Gray’s face turned solemn, and he nodded like he understood. “Oh.” He rubbed my arm. “You ready to go, babe?”

I nodded.

Outside, I stood back and watched as Gray strapped Ella into a car seat in the back of the car and loaded the pink stroller into the trunk. When the three of us were alone in the backseat, Ella said something I didn’t hear, and Gray threw his head back in laughter. The two of them had definitely connected on some level already. Suddenly I felt like a third wheel and thought maybe it hadn’t been such a great idea to come.

I’d been lost in thought and heard Gray’s voice, yet the words he’d said were out of reach.

He squeezed my hand. “You okay? You seem like you’re somewhere else.”

I looked out the window and noticed we were already going back over the bridge to Manhattan. The first ten minutes of the drive were gone. “Yeah. I’m fine. Sorry. Where are we going, anyway?”

“I thought we’d get out at 72nd Street and walk over to Conservatory Water.”

“That’s the place where they race the model—”

Gray shushed me and winked. “It’s a surprise for her.”

I smiled. “I guess I need to get used to spelling things.”

Ella had been swinging her legs and looking out the window as we crossed the bridge. But she heard the word spell.

“I can spell my name!” She signed as she called out the letters. “E-L-L-A.”

Gray beamed. “I’m not sure learning Hindu to converse in private would matter. She’d pick it up faster than we could. Smart as a whip.”

Ella pointed to her head. “Daddy gave me my brain.”

My eyes grew wide. Gray lowered his voice and whispered to me. “It’s not what you think. I’ll explain later.”

Traffic was light, so we breezed over to the park. Again I watched the interaction between Gray and Ella, fascinated by how at ease he seemed to be with his little girl already. Once he unloaded the pink stroller with pedals from the car and strapped Ella in, he told Al to meet us back at this spot in two hours.

Ella watched everything going on around us as we walked toward the water, which gave Gray and me a chance to talk.

“She’s obsessed with the E.B White Stuart Little book and movie,” he said. “Her mother mentioned some of her favorite things in the letter she wrote me. So I watched it the other night to have something to talk to her about, and I realized that a big part of the movie takes place in this park at the Conservatory Water—the place where everyone sails the remote-control sailboats. Max said she’s never been here, so I thought she might recognize it from the story.”

I smiled. “That’s really sweet. I bet she’s going to love it.”

No sooner than the words left my mouth, Ella validated my thought. She shrieked and pointed toward the lake filled with boats as it came into view when we turned the corner.

“Stuart, Stuart!” she yelled.

It reminded me of the kind of thing my dad would have done when I was growing up—on days he was my dad and not someone else’s.

For the next hour, Ella stayed glued to her seat, watching the hundreds of motorized sailboats floating around. Even though Gray had been clear that Stuart Little wasn’t really on any of them, I was pretty sure she was checking for herself. At one point, she climbed onto Gray’s lap and made herself comfortable. The look on his face was priceless. Happiness radiated from him.

After we had lunch, Gray suggested we get some ice cream, so we all walked over to a stand and then sat on the park bench.

Ella licked her cone and turned to speak to me. “Did you know my mom has cancer?”

I coughed my ice cream down the wrong pipe.

Gray made sure I was okay and then took over the conversation.

“Yes. We know about that.”

Ella licked her ice cream and pondered for a while. “She’s going to die.”

This time it was Gray who choked. I walked to the ice cream cart and grabbed us three bottles of water. Gray chugged half a bottle, and his voice still croaked when he spoke. “That happens sometimes when people are sick, sweetheart. Unfortunately.”

“Are you going to die?”

God, this is the most bizarre conversation. And I was glad as hell that Gray had jumped in to tackle it.

“Not for a very long time, I hope.” Gray pulled her ponytail. “I haven’t even gotten all of my colors for each day of the week down yet. So I hope I have a long time to go.”

She laughed and went back to her ice cream. To Ella, the conversation could have been about the weather. Yet Gray looked like he needed a drink, and I thought I needed more than one.

***

The sun had started to set as we pulled onto the side streets that led to Ella’s house. She’d fallen asleep in the car, and I’d rested my head on Gray’s shoulder and closed my own eyes. The entire day had been pretty surreal. As terrified as I’d been before coming today, watching Gray with his daughter—getting to spend time with the two of them—had actually alleviated some of my concerns.

In my mind, I could see the three of us together. While that still terrified me, I could visualize moving past it as time went on. That was all I needed—to get on a path that could get me there.

“You look tired.” Gray brushed hair from my face as we pulled to the curb in front of Max and Ella’s brownstone.

“What gave you that idea? The fact that my arms are limp by my sides, and I drooled on your shoulder on the way here?”

Gray side-glanced at Ella, who was still sound asleep. “Why don’t you stay in the car and relax while I carry her in.” He leaned closer so our lips were touching, and I could feel them move while he spoke. “You’re going to need your energy for when I get you home.”