Chapter 6

SIX

ELLIS

I’m left on the floor of some dark, windowless room. I’m positive that if I ever see that Scottish man again, I’m going to punch him right in the nuts. Like could he not have double-checked that I was a murderer before deeming me one and sending me off here?

I’m not a violent man. I’ve never once thought about punching someone, but right now… right now I kind of want to.

My body aches as I wallow on the floor for a bit, working at the cut Tavish had made in the binds around my ankles. When the tape finally splits, relief washes through me before I realize that… I’m not quite sure what I’m relieved about. My wrists are still bound, I’m still on some bad guy’s island, and I’m clearly not meant for this shit. They’re going to murder me, and I’m going to die here and?—

My breath is coming hard, anxiety compressing my lungs and creating a ball of misery in the pit of my stomach.

I stop and just sit down for a moment so I can take a deep breath and hopefully calm myself enough that I can trick myself into thinking that I can do this.

I mean… if I already plan on dying, then I’ve already submitted to it. But I’m not just going to sit down and die.

Why would I? Why should I? Why does this guy deserve any say in what happens to me?

So think…

I’m going to get out of this room, punch Tavish in the dick, steal a boat or something, and get the fuck home.

Simple.

So simple.

It’s like a video game.

Yeah, that’s all this is. A video game where you can’t restart after you die and where you don’t automatically heal after being shot fifteen times by throwing some unexplainable liquid all over your wounds.

But still.

I’m going to die, aren’t I?

No… no… calm down.

I hook my hands down, trying to use my ass to snap the thick tape around my wrists, but it holds tight. I roll around, flipping this way and that before I realize there’s a weak spot in the tape that finally starts to give. It hurts as it digs into my wrists that are already red from all the flailing and struggling I’ve done, but I think I can feel it giving a little bit.

Relief floods through me as the tape finally snaps enough that I can squeeze one arm out before tearing the tape the rest of the way off. Finally free, I’m now faced with a door that’s surely locked down tight, but before that… are there any weapons in here?

Clearly, they weren’t planning on me getting loose and had thrown me in here momentarily, because the room isn’t as empty as I’d assume a torture chamber would be. There are cupboards and countertops and while they’re mostly empty, telling me this room isn’t used often, I do find that there’s a bathroom connected to it. And in the bathroom is an aerosol can sitting above the toilet. I grab that and then snatch up the ceramic lid to the toilet. I carry both out with me as I sneak my way over to the door.

I decide I’ll spray first, and as they’re reeling back, I’ll go in for a swing and hit them right in the face.

I can do this. I can do this quite well. Yep. Spray and then hit. Spray and then hit.

My heart is beating out of my chest as I press my body against the wall, waiting for the door to open.

What if I fuck up? What if it doesn’t even spray?

I give it a little spritz to make sure the can even works.

The smell immediately smacks me right in the face, making me sneeze just as the door swings open, and it’s my moment to shine. I’m so busy caught up in a sneeze that I just start spraying wildly.

“Motherfucker!” a man yells, reeling back as I grab for the ceramic lid.

“Fuck! Stop! It’s me!” Tavish shouts, which just means that I put a bit more oomph into the swing that collides with his gut, making him stagger back as I drop the lid, slip out the door and take off running.

“You… asshole!” he growls as he races after me. Like it was A-okay for him to drag me off to fucking nowhere and not okay for me to spray him with bathroom spray!

He gets in close, so I spray him in the face again, causing it to go right into his open mouth. He starts gagging and coughing as tears stream from his watery eyes, and still he chases after me.

Quickly, I rush down the hallway until I hear someone heading our way. Anxiety eating into me, I slip through a door and am furious when Tavish follows me. Especially when I realize that it’s practically a cupboard that I’ve stuffed myself in with this man who reeks of bathroom spray now that I’ve used the entire can on his face. He slams the door shut, closing me inside with him.

“There’s a fucking… mop jabbing me in the ass,” he grumbles. “Scoot over.”

“I don’t want a mop jabbing me in the ass. Weirdly enough, I also didn’t want to get abducted, thrown in a car, dragged off to who knows where and beat up! You deal with it. I hope it fucking jabs you hard.”

He shoves me, and because I’m more preoccupied cradling my empty spray can to my chest, I’m easily pushed over.

“I’ve decided to become a murderer, just so I can get rid of you,” I hiss.

“You don’t have the balls.”

“Oh, but an hour ago you were adamant I was off killing people!”

“I’m easily swayed by money. That guy simply had more money than you. And the information I was given really did make you seem like the killer!”

“I wish I had more spray,” I growl, regretting not saving more for his face even though I’m already trying not to choke to death in this small closet.

“I’m sorry I messed up, alright? You can’t fathom the number of killers who try to pretend they’re not!”

The noise outside becomes louder as I quickly quiet down, left to deal with this obnoxious man in my space. I wouldn’t be here right now if it weren’t for him. I would be off… sitting at home alone… but it would be significantly better than this bullshit!

“What the hell is that smell?” one of the guys mutters.

“Fuck if I know… it seems to be originating from this closet.”

While the closet is rather dark, I can still feel Tavish’s eyes boring into me. I mean… maybe I did lead them right to us with the abundance of scent… but… it’s really not my fault that this asshole followed me in here!

The door opens and I chuck the can at the man who opened it, having no idea what else to do. It thwacks him right between the eyes, making his head snap back, and just as he starts to recover, Tavish whips the frisky broom out and smashes the guy in the head with it before throwing it like a javelin at the other guy. And while he deals with all of that, I scuttle down the hallway, positive that’s his issue to deal with. Karma’s a bitch and all that.

And with that, I slip right into a room, hoping no one noticed which one. When I see a window, relief washes through me as I hurry over to it. I’m not quite sure what I’m going to do when I’m outside, but it has to be better than being inside . It’s also still dark out, so they probably can’t see me if I’m off running through the night until someone can rescue me or I can learn how to drive a boat.

Which would be the ultimate plan if the window would open.

“You’re not getting through that window.”

I jump and look over at Tavish leaning against the doorframe. I can’t tell if he’s leaning there in an “I’m so cocky” way or if he’s leaning in an “I’m bleeding out” way.

Either way, it doesn’t pertain to me at all, so I look for another weapon to use against him.

“Leave or I’m gonna… I’m gonna…”

I look around for what “I’m gonna” do. I snatch up the first thing I can find, which happens to be a magazine.

“Spank me?” he asks, like he’s not fully against the idea.

“No! I’m going to… uhh… kick you in the nuts.”

“Why?” he asks, like he could possibly be uncertain why I dislike him.

“WHY?” I hiss. “Look around and take a guess why.”

He actually looks around and I realize that I’ve been abducted by the world’s most ridiculous man.

Nope. No, it’s okay. It’s all okay, I’m just going to take a deep breath and get out of here. I will swim if I have to… unless there are sharks.

“Are there sharks?”

“In my pants?”

“What?”

“You were talking about kicking me in the nuts and now sharks. There’s an anaconda but not a shark, if you get me.” Then he winks at me while looking half dead with his watery red eyes, and I’m unsure whether he thought that was going to be attractive.

A noise draws my attention, and I hurry over to the only door in the room besides the one I’d entered through, deciding that if the first closet situation wasn’t enough, a second would be better. Second time’s a charm and all that, right? This one is even more snug, but I cram in anyway.

“Are you going to scoot over or should I just sit on your lap?” Tavish asks.

“No! Go find a different closet.”

“I actually found this closet first,” he says as I hear someone coming. He crams me in farther and sits down on my lap before pulling the door shut.

“Why are you on my lap?”

“Do you want me to sit on your face? There’s no fucking room in here.”

“Go find a different closet.”

“You sure like to complain.”

I gape at him. “Which part of you abducting me and dragging me off to Murder Island isn’t worthy of complaining over?”

“I’m starting to see your point,” he says.

“Starting to?” I ask as I hear someone get closer. His ass bones are digging into my leg and he has this weird aroma of bathroom spray mixed with blood. I want to tell him to move, but the guy outside the closet is far too close and could hear us if we bump into anything. So that’s how I get stuck cradling the man I want to spit curses at.

“Hey,” the man says as he enters the room and I freeze, wondering if there are actually two of them, but he replies without another speaking, making me realize that he’s on the phone.

Phone? If I could get his phone, I could call… someone . Like… the police, right? They’d save me… maybe. Whose jurisdiction is some sketchy rich man’s private island?

“What are you wearing?” he asks as I grow increasingly confused. “Ooh, pink panties… color me interested.”

“I’m just going to shoot him,” Tavish whispers.

“Shhh,” I hiss.

“Wait, are you into this shit?” he asks.

Into it? No! I’m into living!

“Oh, my ferocious kitten, let me hear you purr,” the man says.

“I’m getting secondhand embarrassment,” Tavish mutters. “I get a bit murdery when I’m embarrassed.”

“How did you ever think I was the bad guy?” I whisper.

The guy outside the closet shows no sign of slowing down. “I would take my face and just stuff it between your two beautiful pillows.”

“Pillows?” Tavish whispers. “He can’t even say breasts? They’re breasts, my man.”

Did I ever imagine I would be in a closet with another man listening to someone having phone sex while everyone else is trying to kill us?

Ha… ha ha. This is a nightmare. A literal nightmare.

“I will squeal all night long for you,” the man says. “Yessssss, honey. I’m gonna suck your little toe?—”

The door to the room opens. “What the fuck was that?” a second man asks.

“What?”

“Did you just tell my mother you’re going to suck her toes?”

“See? I should just put him out of his misery,” Tavish whispers.

“No, god no. I would never… say that… to your mother… why would I… no.”

“Are you going to suck my mother’s toes?” The second man sounds delirious at this point.

“N-Not unless she wanted me to! Wait… you hear that? Someone’s calling for me.”

“The only thing calling for you is Death,” the second guy growls as he stomps after the first.

Now that the two are finally gone, I realize that Tavish is rather quiet…

What if… he’s dead, and now I have a dead man on me, and I swear if he’s just fucking croaked on my lap I’m going to be so pissed. It’s not like I want to be with him, but the idea of him being dead makes me realize that maybe I really do want to keep him around. Because if he’s dead… I’m completely alone and one hundred percent outside my expertise. I know how to hold ferocious kittens, not any of this shit!

“T-Tavish?”

Silence.

I shake him harder than I probably need to. “Tavish!”

“Huh! Wha? Is he back to sucking Mommy’s toes?”

“What?”

“I don’t fucking know, man.”

“I thought you were dead.”

“HA! I’m a motherfucking bear. You think bears die from being stabbed once? HA!”

And then he smashes his head into something, making a horrible thunk.

“Are you dead now?” I ask.

“Nope! I’m perfectly fine. Totally fine. My eyes are just bleeding a bit from the spray, so I didn’t see the wall there.”

“I see,” I say as my hand bumps something hard on his leg and I realize it’s a phone. Absolutely thrilled, I dig it out only to see that there’s no reception. “Do you know how to get off this island?”

“I sure do,” he answers.

“Are you lying?”

“I sure am.”

“Come on, man.”

I turn the flashlight on and tuck it between my shoulder and my chin so both hands are free as I reach out to the wrap around his shoulder. I don’t peel it off but peek under it and see that he’s still bleeding a fair amount. Probably from using it so much. I grab both ends of the cloth he has tied around it and give it a good snug pull, tightening it, which makes his eyes go wide.

“You… fucking…”

“I’m going to go try to find some medical stuff. And if I save your life, you’re getting me off this island. Do you understand?”

“Sure, sure. So you’re going to go… do something… and I’m going to… do something… and that man is gonna suck some other man’s momma’s toes.”

“You might be dead before I get back and if you are… I want you to know that you really fucking suck at your job.”

“But I don’t suck as bad as that guy sucking them toes.”

I squirm out from under him and leave him, then decide that there’s no reason he should have a gun when I don’t, so I go back in and grab his gun. He doesn’t put up much of a fight besides a “You’ll shoot your eye out,” so I hurry off before he can register that I’m taking both his phone and his gun.

Honestly, I don’t know what to do now, but I feel like if I don’t do something, he’s going to keep bleeding, and I will have, oddly, a worse chance of getting out alive.

I listen carefully before pulling open the door and come face to face with a man who looks as shocked to see me as I am to see him.