Prologue

Prologue

“Can I have another piece of cheese, Miss Donnell?” Eliza asked her nanny, seated just beside her on the picnic blanket laid out for them in the open gardens under the large oak tree.

When she had awoken this morning, the weather had been extremely pleasant, and Eliza had asked Lara to skip their lessons today and have a picnic instead.

It was usually rather difficult to dissuade Lara, but Eliza had shown some mock sadness over her parents’ prolonged absence, which had softened Lara’s heart, and she had easily obliged to the innocent request.

“Of course, Lady Eliza,” Lara had conceded, tucking her newly emerged white strands under her well-secured bun, “I suppose one afternoon of missed classes won’t cause our progress much harm.”

She picked up another piece of cheese from the picnic basket packed for them by the cook and handed it to Eliza, who took it greedily. She had always loved cheese and that was what she had asked her parents to bring for her when they returned from their trip to France.

Eliza had been extremely upset when they had refused to take her along with them on their trip, knowing fully well that she was never left behind on such adventures.

Her parents, the Duke and Duchess of Grafton, had insisted she stayed home while they attended to some important work.

Being the perfect daughter even at the young age of seven, Eliza had not wanted to be a bother and simply agreed to let them go if they brought her exquisite flavours of cheese from France.

And just like that, the deal was made.

Only now, she waited for them day and night since it was already past their visiting time, and they should be home any time now. Her mother had written to her almost two weeks ago and promised they would return soon. Eliza had never been happier about a letter, having been away from her parents long enough already.

“Do you think Mama and Papa might return home today?” she asked Lara, who smiled at her, running a hand through Eliza’s beautiful, golden hair.

“I certainly hope so,” Lara sighed. “The house does not seem alive without the duke and duchess.”

Eliza stared curiously at Lara, wondering what the comment meant, but in her heart, she already knew. It was apparent how much the servants loved her parents, them being the kindest duke and duchess in all of England, or at least that was what everyone who knew them said.

All Eliza knew was that they were the most perfect parents ever to exist and loved her more than she could have ever asked for.

“I cannot wait for the gifts they will bring for me.” Eliza laughed, taking a small bite from the cube of cheese in her hand.

“My goodness, Miss Eliza.” Lara chuckled. “And here I thought you were upset because you missed them so dearly. But you clearly only miss the presents they always bring for you.”

“That is not true,” Eliza protested, shaking her head vehemently at her nanny.

“Well, then, what is true?”

“I miss them.” Eliza shrugged, remembering her mother’s warm laughter. It had been too long since Eliza had slept in her mother’s lap, and where Lara was equally warm and comforting towards her, Eliza needed her mother.

She wanted to sit beside her father and listen to the countless stories he told her from his youth and the anecdotes they might bring home from France.

She wanted to laugh and joke with them and, as Lara had said, make the house feel alive again. Things were still lively and just as happy, but Eliza certainly could not wait for the house to be full once more.

It had been much too long.

“If you close your eyes and pray to God with all your heart, your prayers might be answered, and they will return home.”

“Are you certain?”

“Positive,” Lara replied seriously.

Without wasting another second, Eliza closed her eyes, her heart focused entirely on praying to God.

Please let them come home soon, even if they have forgotten my gifts. I miss them so much, and I cannot wait to see them. Please God.

As Eliza opened her eyes, a smile on her face, her eyes suddenly widened as they fell on Mr Baker, the butler, standing right in front of her.

She felt as if all her wishes were coming true and the butler was here to inform her that her parents had returned home at last. She stood up excitedly, completely ignoring the solemn expression on Mr Baker’s face.

“My Lady,” he began speaking, his voice softer than usual, “someone is waiting for you in the drawing room. You must come at once.”

“Are they here!? Are Mama and Papa here?”

“Miss Eliz-” he began speaking again, but Eliza felt the strings of her patience coming loose, and she ran past him straight towards the house just a few feet away.

She could hear both Mr Baker and Miss Donnell’s footsteps after her, but the exhilaration from the run and the happiness of her prayers finally being accepted was too much for Eliza to bear. Her parents were waiting for her in the drawing room, and all she needed to do was hug them. As tightly as she could.

As she pushed through the large drawing room door, her tiny frame exerting all her strength, the large smile that graced her lips immediately faded.

What are they doing here?

Where she had expected a familiar set of blonde hair and grey-blue eyes like her own, she was met with unfamiliar faces, their expressions grim. Eliza felt as if she had met both of them before, but she could not place them.

The disappointment of not finding her parents waiting for her was too large, and for a few short seconds, she stood staring at them and completely forgot her manners.

“May I help you?” She was suddenly jerked into the role of being the only family member present in the house, the duty of meeting the guests falling on her.

Even if she did not know who they were.

“Eliza, darling!” The woman, her blonde hair tied in a neat chignon, immediately made her way towards Eliza, arms spread as if in an embrace.

Before Eliza could understand what was happening, the woman bent down, her hands resting on Eliza’s bare arms as she held her close. The woman’s dark blue eyes were nothing like Eliza’s mother’s, for her mother’s eyes were as clear as the ocean on a sunny day, while this person had dark blue eyes, almost as dark as the night sea.

For reasons she could not place, Eliza suddenly felt afraid.

Something is not right.

“The last time we saw you, you were barely two years old, and you are almost a young woman now,” the man added, making his way towards her. His raven hair was neatly styled, and his face looked quite a lot like her father’s, but his eyes were more grey than blue.

Who are they? And where are my parents?

“Pardon me, but I have no memory of meeting the two of you. Could you please tell me your names?”

The man bent down as well, almost at eye level with Eliza now.

“I am Edgar Russel, my dear, the Earl of Leicester, and this is my wife, Beatrice Russel. Surely you cannot say that you have no memory of meeting your one and only uncle?”

Uncle? Eliza had never been more confused.

“You are my father’s brother?” she asked, her eyebrows scrunching.

“Yes,” the woman, Beatrice Russel, replied.

She took Eliza’s hand and led her towards the sofa, where she made Eliza sit down before sitting beside her. Footsteps reached just outside the drawing room but stopped there, and Eliza knew someone was standing there. She was sure it must be Mr Baker or Lara and just the semblance of their presence gave her strength.

Her heart, on the other hand, was still gripped in fear.

“I am afraid my parents are not here if you have come to see them,” Eliza quickly said, unsure of the purpose of this unannounced visit.

“We have come bearing news, my child,” Beatrice Russel said, her dark blue eyes suddenly filling with moisture.

Eliza’s heartbeat accelerated.

“What news?”

“Your parents’ carriage met with an accident while returning home to you. We live near the accident scene, and when we got the news, we went to see and recognized the carriage.”

Accident? Eliza felt a faint ringing in her ears as her head began to spin.

“Are they okay? Are they resting at your place or are they still on their way here?” she found herself asking, although a part of her mind kept telling her that the question was pointless. If her parents were okay, they would have come home themselves. They had met with an accident and were no longer present here.

She felt tears sting her eyes.

“The accident was too serious, my dear,” her uncle replied, “even the physician could not do anything to save them. They passed away.”

She could hear the woman beside her, her aunt, sobbing loudly, but the ringing in Eliza’s ears only increased until she could not hear anything. She looked up, her uncle’s mouth still moving as he stared at Eliza calmly. She blinked multiple times, trying to focus on his words.

“… We will be moving in with you immediately so you do not feel alone … our whole family … I have children your age, Eliza, and you will not feel as if you have lost your family even for one second … Henry and Victoria … and Margaret … we will take care of you, Eliza.”

Her parents were gone. They were not coming back.

How is this true? How is any of this real?

She felt tears running down her face, and she was certain her pale, porcelain skin must be botched red. She shared that trait with her mother because whenever she cried, her skin also turned red. Not anymore. Her mother would never shed any tears ever again because she was no longer in this world. She was gone.

No. No. It can’t be.

Eliza looked up as the drawing room door opened, and Miss Donnell walked inside along with Mr Baker. Some other servants were right behind them as well. Eliza saw tears in Ralph’s eyes, her father’s trusted valet. Everyone knew. She could see on their faces that everyone knew her parents were gone, but Eliza could not believe it.

“Miss Eliza?” Lara whispered, walking towards Eliza.

Lara’s hand on her face forced Eliza out of her shocked stance, and she looked around. Her uncle and aunt were still there, right beside her on the other side, but Eliza could not care. She could not care about what they had just said. Everyone was lying.

Her parents had promised they would return from France and bring her cheese and exquisite presents, and they always kept their promise. They would never abandon her in this manner. Eliza was certain.

“It cannot be true,” she whispered, staring straight at nothing in particular, “I am sure it is just a silly misunderstanding, and Mama and Papa are on their way home to us right now. They cannot just leave like this and never return. It is not true.”

“My Lady,” Mr Baker came closer, his face streaked with tears, “it is true. His Grace and Her Grace are no longer in this world. We have received the news from several sources. I am terribly sorry for this unfortunate sadness thrust upon you.”

“Ralph,” Eliza called out to the elderly valet, standing at the back of the group, sobbing uncontrollably, “Ralph, you must tell them it is not true. They will return to us, won’t they?”

She stood up from the sofa, letting go of Lara’s touch, and hurried towards Ralph, who quickly wiped the tears on his face. He bent down, sitting on his knees in front of Eliza as he looked at her. Eliza could see the truth in his face. Even he did not believe that her parents were returning.

How can everyone be so pessimistic?

“I wish it were a simple misunderstanding, My Lady.” He shook his head. “But the news is true.”

No.

It cannot be.

Footsteps came through the open drawing room door, and Eliza looked up, hoping half to death for her parents to be standing there. She wanted to run to their warm embrace and tell everyone how it was just a harmless joke, and they were still alive.

They had to be.

However, instead of her parents, a familiar set of faces met her. The Blackwoods were here. Eliza immediately knew if someone knew the truth, it would be the trusted neighbours they had on the next estate since they were her parents’ closest friends. Eliza immediately ran towards Lord and Lady Lennox, their son, Alexander, right behind them.

“You must tell me at once that everyone is lying to me.” Eliza could no longer control her sobbing. “Tell me my parents are still on their way to the estate.”

“Oh, my child,” Lady Isabelle Blackwood, the Marchioness of Lennox, bent down and engulfed Eliza into her comforting arms. Eliza clung to her, crying, her worst fear confirmed.

Her parents were no more.

No one had been lying, and it was certainly not a joke. Her parents had truly left.

She parted from Lady Blackwood, her eyes falling on the grief-stricken face of her father’s best friend, Lord Richard Blackwood. Alexander, who was just a few years older than Eliza and one of her closest friends, stood just beside his father respectfully, appearing sorrowful. The Blackwoods would never lie to her.

Her parents had left her all alone in this world.

Eliza felt as if she could not breathe, and without waiting another second, she ran straight out of the drawing room, past the main door of the house, which had been left open. Unsure of where her feet were taking her, she kept running and running until she finally could not run anymore and stopped.

The little creek, which lay just between their estates, lay in front of her, and Eliza sat down, letting her feet dip into the cold water. She always came here with Alexander when they wanted to go fishing or just have a little adventure. Eliza felt both happy and safe here, and right now, she could not think of any other place that might feel the same way as this little corner.

“Eliza?”

She did not need to turn around to know who was behind her; his soft, friendly voice was a little too familiar. It was Alexander. Her closest friend. Her secret keeper and confidante. The only person who taught her tricks and told her secrets of the world.

She stayed quiet as he came and sat beside her, taking his shoes off to dip his feet in the water as well. This was a ritual they shared, and Eliza could not even remember how often she sat this way with him, simply talking.

Although all those times were happy times, and they had laughed their hearts out, but today, Eliza felt as if she could never even laugh again.

“What will I do, Alexander? What will I do without them?”

“I cannot even imagine the pain you must be suffering at this very moment, Eliza,” he whispered, “but what I do know is that no pain is too large for your heart and for this world. Things happen unexpectedly, and we have to endure them, but all the pain passes away with time. You just have to be strong.”

“I don’t know how.”

“Eliza, I know you feel alone right now.” He sighed, turning to look at her, their feet still dipped in the cool, clear water. “But you are not alone. You have your family and every single one of your servants love you with all their heart. But more than all of that, you have me and my family with you here. We will truly never let you feel alone. I promise.”

Eliza felt numb, tears no longer coming to her eyes.

“I miss them.” Despite Alexander’s comforting words, a cold dread settled over her, and Eliza felt devastated and terrified as if someone had taken away the one thing she cherished most in the world. As if no one was there to protect her any longer, and she was left with no one and nothing.

“They are not gone, Eliza.”

“What do you mean?” She finally looked at him. His dark brown hair flew breezily with the wind as Eliza stared sadly at his friendly face. His round, russet eyes remained trained on her. Staring at him comforted her as if she was reminded she still had her friend.

“They are with you in your heart, Eliza. They always will be.” He smiled, his entire face shining, “Their memories are stored in your mind and every corner of your house, and when you look around, you will find they are with you everywhere. I know it feels as if they have left you all alone, but they will never leave you now. They will forever be looking over you from the skies above.”

“Forever?”

“Always.” He moved in closer, patting her head affectionately as he always did whenever she asked him a question. She leaned in to the touch, comforted by its familiarity.

“So I will never be alone?” She felt like a weak little girl in front of Alexander, but his comforting expression made everything seem right. He lifted his right hand, tracing the beauty spot on her left cheek.

Eliza remembered how he always told her that the two beauty marks on her face, one under her right eye and the other on her left cheek, made her appear unique since no one else could ever have them but Eliza.

She tried to smile underneath his touch but failed.

“Never ever.”

“Do you promise?”

“I promise.”

As Eliza crept closer to Alexander, her head resting on his shoulder, she felt that despite the gut-wrenching grief in her body, things would eventually be alright again.

Hopefully, very, very soon.