Chapter 18

Odhran

Iwas ashamed to admit I'd had to jerk off twice last night after Larkin fell asleep, my body still humming after what she'd let me do to her in the library.

I ran my tongue over my bottom lip, remembering how soft she'd been against my lips, how sweet she'd tasted down my throat.

I pushed those thoughts to the dark recesses of my mind as I focused on taking the narrow road to our destination. But the throbbing of my stiff cock made it almost impossible to think of anything else.

The need to mate with her, to mark and claim her, ran so hard in me that with each passing second it was getting difficult to concentrate.

I'd managed the need to claim my mate for all these decades to focus on one thing. Finding her. Getting her back. And killing the bastards who had taken her.

And although the fuckers who'd hurt her were and would be taken care of, Banner and Adryan and many factions of the Otherworld making sure they were no longer a threat, all I could focus on was making my wee female feel good. Making her happy and helping to keep her demons at bay.

I glanced over and saw her focus was out the passenger side window. I reached down and adjusted my cock, nearly groaning as sparks of pleasure shot through me just from that small touch.

I was also ashamed to admit that I'd actually orgasmed like some lad after eating her out, unable to control myself so that I'd shot my load right in my jeans as I felt her tug on my hair and tasted her climax on my tongue and down my throat.

And my wolf, the greedy bastard, refused to back down, refused to submit. He was so close to the surface, pacing, scratching me from the inside out, that I couldn't help being partially shifted.

My nails were claws, canines elongated. I was bigger than when I was in human form, my eyes shifting back and forth from glowing blue to my normal color.

I knew he was just as anxious as I was to be with Larkin; despite his impatience, my human side was still stronger, still able to keep him back.

She needed time to understand this new world, much more time to come to terms with everything, to heal from the inside out before she could even contemplate being fully mated.

And I'd give her as much as she needed. A lifetime. Eternity.

She was here, with me, and that was all that mattered.

Maybe I need to fight in the Guard, go a few brutal rounds with some of the Lycan spiders, maybe even Cian since he could match my strength and savagery blow-by-blow.

Maybe I needed a run in the woods. Maybe I just needed to get so drunk I blacked out.

But I could never do any of those, could never leave her unprotected in any way. I was the only one who could fully keep her safe, and the very thought of being so out of it, of having to leave her while I shifted into my beast form and ran this energy out, had panic swelling in me.

I glanced at her once more and looked at her profile, reminded of how lucky I was, even if I would never deserve her, never be good enough for her.

"Are you okay?"

I'd been so lost in my thoughts that her soft voice startled me, and I looked over, seeing an inquisitive expression on her face.

"I'm okay, darlin'." Her brows furrowed, and I focused on the road again, my cock throbbing the longer she stared at me. I curled my hands tightly around the steering wheel, hearing the leather creak.

I couldn't stop thinking about what I wanted to do to her. With her. What I wanted her to do to me. I clenched my jaw and forced the growl that would've spilled through to stay in place.

"You seem pretty agitated. In fact," she said softly, and I glanced at my groin. Her cheeks turned pink and she looked down at her lap, at her hands that were folded together. "You've been a little… off since the library." She whispered the last part.

I groaned then, my cock jerking, throbbing. Just hearing her talk about what she'd let me do to her, and smelling her arousal start to fill the interior of the car, had heat rushing through my body.

The memory of her coming for me, on my tongue and down the back of my throat, nearly had me orgasming right in my jeans again.

I couldn't keep my wolf at bay as I growled out, "Tae know ye're thinking about what we did last night, what I did tae ye, how I had my mouth between yer thighs and licked ye until ye came…" I tightened my hands so hard around the steering wheel I feared I'd crack the fucking thing. "It's hard tae control my need for ye." Her breath caught on that last part. "But I'll never hurt ye. I'll never rush ye or force ye tae do anything ye're no' comfortable with?—"

"I know," she said softly. "I know you'd never hurt me."

I exhaled at hearing her confirm that.

The scent of her arousal grew, and I glanced at her, unable to help myself. Her lips were slightly parted as she stared straight ahead, her hands now gripping the edge of her shirt, her knuckles white. She worried her plump bottom lip with her straight white teeth, and I nearly groaned again.

I inhaled deeply, smelling how wet she was between her thighs, and couldn't help but picture how pink and soft she'd been as I stared at her pussy right before I ate her out.

A slow and feral smile spread across my face as my wolf pushed forward even more.

And I wanted to do that again, and again and again. I was surprised I was even able to still drive. My cock throbbing, my balls so heavy and drawn up tight against my body that even the jostling of the SUV was torture.

What I wanted to do was pull over on the side of the road, haul her slight body on top of mine, and kiss her until she was breathless and clutching me.

I looked in the rearview mirror at the SUV following behind us, the vehicle full of Lycans trailing close by as we headed toward her family's property.

Although I was confident in my prowess and strength to protect Larkin, I wasn't going to take any chances. Not ever again. I'd forever have sentries protecting the property. I'd always have someone watching over her if I wasn't there. I had guilt that would never leave me. It was a scar inside of me, deep and jagged, forever aching.

I reached across the console and took her hand in mine, her palm so much smaller, fitting perfectly in my hold. We were silent for the rest of the trip, and I left the music on low. My girl was a fan of classic rock, one of the decades she'd missed because she was living a nightmare.

We'dbeen driving for hours by the time we finally reached her family's property, or what once was where her family lived.

I could feel the anxiety start to pour from her. She recognized her surroundings. She knew her family wasn't in this world anymore, long since passed. I tried to tell her before, but she didn't need to hear the words to know that she was now the only living heir in her line.

But I still sensed her sliver of hope that she was wrong.

I pulled off to the small strip of dirt road and left the car idling as I climbed out. The large gate that blocked the entry had a No Trespassing sign hanging in front of it.

After unlatching it and pulling the metal gate open, I signaled for the other SUV to hang back. I knew Larkin would want this moment to be private, sacred.

Once back in the SUV, I drove the winding narrow road, the creek that ran parallel with the road seeming to take up my girl's attention.

"Do you think whoever owns this land now will be upset that we're trespassing?" Her voice was soft, distant.

"No, but even if they were, it would no' matter. I'm still taking my mate to where she needs tae go."

I loved the little smile that curved her lips after I said that, and chuckled softly when she rolled down the window despite the chill in the air. I knew she wanted to scent the freshness in the air and wanted to recall memories of her childhood.

And I wanted to give them all to her. I wanted to help her unlock all she'd missed, all that had been stolen from her.

I wanted to give her new memories, new experiences. And I wanted to be there the entire time to watch the wonder and pleasure on her face as she realized over and over again she was really free and nothing would ever harm her again.

The wind blew her hair over her shoulders and across her back. Her sweet, addicting scent, already saturating the interior of the car, became even more potent.

And thank fuck we reached the property at that time, or I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from reaching out and touching her.

I pulled to a stop, cut the engine, and when I got another concentrated dose of the lavender that clung to her hair and skin, a low growl left me.

I watched for a suspended moment as she looked through the front windshield at the vast countryside. I knew she could see the edge of the lake on the property, the rolling hills, the green meadows, the towering trees. I was sure it looked different now, more lush, slightly overgrown. Although the property had been taken care of over the years, it hadn't been occupied since her parents passed away decades before.

"It looks the same but… It doesn't." Her voice was soft and she glanced over at me, biting her bottom lip again, her nervousness clear across her face.

I let her set the pace, sat there silently until she was ready to get out of the vehicle, and only then did I follow.

I stayed close to her, curling my fingers into my palms so I didn't reach out and touch her, didn't take away from this moment where she explored and let her mind and emotions open up fully.

It was a wonderful thing to see, a wondrous thing to experience with her. And I couldn't take my focus off her face.

Because although we were surrounded by the beauty that only nature could create, I was staring at perfection.

We walked in silence side by side for long moments as she took everything in. I watched her expression transform from happiness to sorrow to a deep melancholy.

Finally we made it to her childhood home. The small cottage was built against the side of a sprawling hill, the overhang covered with moss and flowers, the wood siding weathered, the glass of the windows foggy from age.

"I can't believe they kept it here all these years." Her voice was nothing but a whisper as she stared wide-eyed at the place she once called home.

I took a step back when she took one forward and watched as she lifted her hand to run her fingers over the curved doorknob, the metal weathered and oxidized.

She glanced over her shoulder at me, and there was so much rawness in her expression it was like a knife in my chest.

I gave her a reassuring smile and inclined my head for her to enter. And when the knob turned and her eyes widened that entering was as simple as that, a rush of emotion filled me.

I hadn't told her yet, hadn't told her the truth about the property and what it meant now.

She entered and a small gasp left her. I followed inside, the interior slightly illuminated from the filtering sunlight that came through the windows, dust particles floating in the air as we made our way deeper inside the cottage.

"It's the same," she said with this wonder in voice. "It looks exactly how it did when I lived here." She looked over at me with wide eyes, her hands held out, her palms upward. "I don't understand. How?" She glanced around again and started touching everything. The small bookshelf that lined one wall, the hand-carved dining room table, the wooden rocking chair that sat beside the hearth.

"After ye were taken, I went tae yer parents, explained everything, and told them what happened."

She'd gone silent and still then, her hand covering her mouth as she listened to me confess.

"I was ashamed that I was unable tae protect ye. I wanted tae let them know how I failed ye?—"

"You didn't fail me," she said right away.

I shook my head as my mind was carried back to the past, then I lifted my hand and scrubbed it over my face. I remembered that day I confronted her family as if it were yesterday. I remembered the pain in her father's eyes, how her mother had cried, clutching at her mate.

"I expected them tae want tae kill me. I would no' have fought back. I would've deserved it. But they humbled me, shocked me as they came and embraced me, wrapped their arms around me and said they believed that I would find ye again, bring ye home."

"I made them a promise that I would find ye, that I would no' stop until ye were safe." I looked over at her again and saw she was crying. I was in front of her a second later, brushing away her tears and leaning down to kiss the crown of her head. "Ah, my soft-hearted lass." I kissed every inch of her face until her crying lessened. "If it's any consolation, yer parents passed naturally in the warmth of their bed within days of each other."

She nodded and gave me a watery smile.

"After they passed and the property went up for sale, I outbid anyone who tried tae purchase it."

"You… you bought my family's property?"

I nodded and pulled her in close. She rested her head on my chest, and I closed my eyes at how perfect and right it felt to hold her like this.

"I bought it for ye, so ye had a place to come and remember and feel happy. It took me too long, but I made good on that promise to them, lass." I pulled back and cupped her face. "Now I just have tae make things right between us, and show ye that ye'll never have tae worry about yer safety again."

I kissed her protest away, pulling her in closer and dragging my tongue along the seam of her mouth, urging her to open. And when she did, I plunged inside, my cock hardening, my wolf rising, and everything else fading away.

I found myself lifting her up until I could press her against the side of the hill. I didn't want to be disrespectful and devour her inside her family's home, but I also couldn't stop myself right now.

"Odhran," she moaned.

I broke the kiss to move my lips down her jaw, over her neck, and latch on to the soft skin where her throat and neck met. My canines throbbed, my mouth watered, and I sucked and licked at her skin, desperately wanting to sink my teeth into her and give her my mark.

I ground myself against her belly, loving that she gripped my biceps and dug her nails into my flesh, causing a sting of pain that had me grunting in pleasure. I sucked hard on her flesh, knowing if I couldn't pierce her with my teeth at least I'd leave a bruise that would visibly show the world she was mine.

We were both panting by the time I pulled back, and as I stared at the bruising I'd given her tender neck, my cock jerked behind my zipper.

I dragged my tongue across the bruise, feeling her shiver, and then a second later the air changed around her, her body becoming tight. I gave the side of her neck a gentle kiss before pulling back and moving my thumb over her pulse point as I stared into her eyes. I willed her to calm, letting her feel with my touch and the look in my eyes that she had control.

"Stay with me, baby. Stay right here with me and let me make ye feel good."

She panted, licked her lips, and after a second her body relaxed. When she nodded, I still gave her long seconds to gather herself. I'd never pressure her, never push her when she wasn't one hundred percent with me at this moment.

So when she relaxed and I smelled her anxiety fade as her desire rose once more, only then did I sink to my knees, gathered the hem of her skirt, and while staring into her eyes to gauge her reaction, slowly started to push it up her lithe body.

"Is this okay?" My body was humming with pleasure, and when she nodded, I pushed her skirt farther up, bunching it around her waist.

As if she read my mind, she reached down and gathered the material in her hands, her knuckles turning white as she gripped the skirting fiercely. I could smell how wet she was, and I'd never scented anything as sweet and addicting as the nectar that spilled from between Larkin's thighs.

And I knew I'd never taste anything as intoxicating as the honey that I'd drink from the source, groaning as it slid down my throat. I closed my eyes, and I rested my forehead against her bare belly, the panties she wore plain white cotton but so fucking arousing that my cock jerked again.

For long seconds, I just stayed on my knees with my head against her belly, my eyes closed, and dragged in deep breaths of her scent. I reached down and curled my fingers around the heavy length of my cock, stroking myself through the denim. Up and down. Up and down.

She was trembling against me, and I wrapped my hands around her waist, dragged my fingers over the sides of her ribs, my movements slow as I curled them inward until I was cupping her breasts.

Oh gods, I felt pre-cum spill from the tip of my cock, soaking my jeans.

The bra she wore was white and damn near transparent, her nipples beaded up tightly and pressed against the material. There were so many things I wanted to do to her, so much I wanted, so much pleasure I wanted to give her.

But I had to remind myself to go slow, to get her accustomed to my touch and the sensations she felt.

So when she didn't tense, didn't push me away, I moved my thumbs over the peaks, making them harder, drawing out a soft moan from her.

I kissed her belly, dragged my tongue around her navel, and moved my mouth lower until I could hook my teeth around the edge of her panties.

"My lass," I groaned. "I could have my face buried between yer thighs, my tongue memorizing yer body, tasting yer orgasm on my tongue and sliding down my throat, for the rest of my fooking life."

She gasped, and I knew my words were lewd, vulgar. But I couldn't help it.

I kept dragging my tongue over the soft skin of her belly and when I felt her hands, which were in my hair, tighten against my scalp, I stilled and glanced up at her.

For a long moment, she breathed harshly as she stared at me, and slowly the tightening of her fingers on my scalp eased. I saw something flicker over her face, an expression that had my heart racing even more and my cock throbbing.

"I think…" She licked her lips. "I think I'd like to explore you this time."

Jesus Christ.

My girl wanted to touch me, to learn my body? I clenched my jaw when my wolf rose up, very much pleased with that thought.

It took a great deal of self-control to slowly stand and not crush her body to mine as I fucked her mouth with my lips and tongue.

I shifted around so my back was now pressed to the hill; my hands dug into the soft earth, dirt embedding underneath my nails as I felt my claws grow even more.

She stood only a foot from me, her eyes big and blue, wide as she gazed up at me. And a low moan of pleasure left me when I watched her gaze move up and down my body.

I wanted to be naked for her, to show her what I had to offer, to let her see every single part of me. I wanted her to see my scars, the journey I'd taken to find her that was now written on my body. I wanted her to touch those battle wounds, those raised lines, so she'd memorize them as I had done with every aspect of her.

She was breathing so heavily, and I feared she'd pass out. She reached out and gripped the edge of my shirt, causing my muscles to contract and my body to freeze.

I was a statue, and she pushed the material up, revealing my abdomen. She wet her lips and I nearly groaned at the sight.

"I'm not reacting like this because I'm scared," she whispered, and slowly trailed her gaze up my stomach and looked into my eyes. "I'm reacting like this because I anticipate exploring you, Odhran."

I dug my nails further into the earth behind me and clenched my jaw. Gods, she was so beautiful, especially when she took the initiative and showed her strength, when she didn't let her fear rule her.

When she became as strong as I knew she was. I could see the fire behind her eyes, the desire swirling around her.

I stood there for long moments as she explored me, trailing her fingers over the bare skin of my abdomen, letting the pads move over the hills and ridges of my muscles.

She traced the lines of my scars, her breathing picking up, her pupils dilating fully. "So many," she murmured and glanced at me. "Like me."

I swallowed roughly as I heard a mixture of her awe and sadness. "Fighting, waging war and battles was all I could focus on when I wasn't out searching for ye."

She held her hand right over my heart and stared into my face.

"Vengeance ran through my blood, and I used my rage tae become a machine. I killed, maimed, and hurt. I wanted everyone and everything tae feel what I did. I wanted my inner pain tae be mirrored outside for all tae see and feel.

"After I lost ye, violence and aggression were the only things that made me feel… alive. And so I immersed myself in it. Because feeling that anger was a hell of a lot more welcome than experiencing the bone-crushing loss of no' having ye in my life."

"Oh… my Odhran." She leaned in and kissed me. It wasn't a sexually laced one, but a slow and thorough one that was meant to comfort but still had the effect of making my cock jerk and the front of my jeans to become wet with pre-cum.

And soon that kiss turned deeper until we were both groaning by the time she pulled away.

"I don't know anything about this," she whispered. "But I want to make you feel as good as you made me."

I clenched my jaw and forced myself not to come from those words alone. She had to rise on her toes to trail her lips along my cheek, over my jawbone, and peppered her lips across my throat. I rested my head back against the earth, refusing to close my eyes because I didn't want to look away from her.

She gently scraped her nails down my sides, and my skin tightened. When I lifted my head, her expression had my breath being sucked from my lungs. She looked heavily aroused, drugged with her pleasure. Her eyes were at half-mast, her cheeks pink, her bottom lip red because she couldn't stop biting it.

I could see her nipples stabbing through the thin material of her shirt, and I could smell the wetness of her pussy coating the air between us. I wanted to touch her, but I kept my hands in place, refusing to take anything away from this moment for her.

When her hands got to the top of my jeans, I held my breath, staring into her ocean-blue eyes, feeling adrift and free falling at the very sight of her.

She unbuttoned my pants, gripped the zipper, and pulled down slowly. I could feel her hands shaking as she fumbled slightly, but I didn't move, didn't speak.

Fuck, I didn't even breathe. My cock was throbbing behind the denim, creating its own pulse, the heavy, thick length springing free from the confines of my pants as soon as she pulled the two halves open.

My neck felt tight, my jaw so clenched I feared I cracked my teeth as the chilled air touched my bare cock.

She was so close I felt her body heat, could feel the brush of her skirting moving along my erection. My wolf howled inside.

I felt pre-cum dripping off the tip and sliding down the underside of my shaft.

And when she licked her lips and glanced down, the image of her on her knees as she took me into her mouth was almost my undoing.

"I don't know what I'm doing," she whispered in this ultra-hesitant voice.

"My girl," I groaned as I felt her hands on my lower abdomen, felt the heat from her palm and fingers so close to my cock. "You could just look at me and I'd have an orgasm." I didn't mean to be so crude, but when her pupils dilated even more and the scent of her desire rose another notch, all I wanted to do was strip her bare, lay her on the forest floor, and drag my tongue over every single inch of her bare body.

She glanced down and I held my breath, letting her look her fill, letting her see every single part of me.

"It's big." I didn't know if she meant to say that out loud, but the sound of her voice and her commenting on my size had my cock physically jerking.

"Lass, ye sure know how tae stroke a male's ego." For fook's sake. I'd actually said that.Stroke. Stroking. Her hand on me as she moved her tiny palm up and down my length.

I grunted and breathed out harshly at where my thoughts went.

And when she wrapped her hand around my length, I hissed. My wolf rose, and I felt the change start to come over me. The soft sound she made was a mixture of surprise and pleasure.

My beast pushed for supremacy, and right now I wasn't strong enough to stop him fully. My body became bigger, my muscles stronger. My skin was tight, seconds away from tearing and becoming fur. But my human side was still reigning supreme as I kept him at bay.

"You're so heavy and hot… so hard in my hand. I can't wrap my fingers fully around you."

I groaned painfully and squeezed my eyes shut as her words made it difficult to keep any kind of control. And when she stroked me from root to tip, smearing the copious amounts of pre-cum along the tip and drawing more out, I snapped my eyes open and looked at her.

"Kiss me, lass, because I'm about tae come."

Her eyes widened and her mouth parted, but she rose on her toes and gave me what I wanted.

I speared a hand in her hair and kept her mouth pressed to mine as I licked and sucked at her lips and tongue. Her hand on my cock was hesitant at first, slow and unsure. But I encouraged her to keep going with my moans, and by thrusting into her palm, spurring her on.

"Gods, yes, baby. Ye're making me feel so good. Ye're driving me crazy with need."

She moaned softly, and I let my forehead fall to her shoulder as I closed my eyes and fucked myself in her palm. "Does it feel good?"

I grunted and picked up my pace, thrusting my hips faster into her hold. "It feels so fooking good. Ye're going tae make me come, darlin'. Gods, I'm so close. I'm so close already, and it's because ye're so perfect, ye're doing well."

Her hand was so warm, her skin so soft, her palm so small wrapped tightly around me.

"Ahhh," I grunted, and started thrusting faster, pre-cum a constant drip out of the crown of my erection, covering her hand, making her strokes slick and slippery. "So close," I said in a distorted, gruff voice. "My girl," my wolf growled out and I lifted my head to look into her eyes. I couldn't control my animal as he pushed and gained supremacy. I was growling in Gaelic, praising her for how she was mine, how I'd never let her go. "My Larkin. That's it. Yes," my wolf hissed, and she widened her eyes and moaned.

I was now pushed back, my human side nothing but a voyeur as my animal took center stage and experienced this pleasure firsthand.

"My Larkin," my beast grunted again, and when she twisted her palm and moved it over the crown of my shaft, I couldn't control myself.

I came violently, my entire body shaking from the force.

I roared out, my head tipped back, my eyes squeezed tight, but I forced myself to open them again so I could look down at where she still gripped me. I orgasmed so hard, my cum shot out of me in thick, white arcs and covered the back of her hand and splattered against her shirt and skirt.

I should have felt embarrassed there was so much seed that she'd smell like me so heavily, even without my mark on her throat, all would know she was mine.

"Mine."

And at the thought of making her mine, my mouth watered, my canines ached, and my gaze latched on to her throat as my climax went on and on until I couldn't see straight.

When she drained my balls dry, I sagged against my female and breathed out harshly, never before feeling so sated, so completed or pleasured.

Hell, if this is how she makes me feel and I haven't even claimed her yet, I will no' survive when I actually take my female for the first time.

I wrapped my arms around her and crushed her to me. "I love ye, lass. I love ye more than anything else. I will never be able tae survive without ye."

Truer words had never been spoken before.