Chapter 29

twenty-nine

ISLA

"Oh my God," I mutter to myself with a chuckle when I finally check my phone.

My coworker LaTonya glances at me over a stack of boxes as she wobbles into my classroom. Only her violet braids, forehead, and dark brown eyes are completely visible. I can barely see her nose, the boxes are piled so high. "What?"

I hurry over and grab half of them before she trips over a desk and ends up ass over tits on the floor. It wouldn't be the first time. She's brilliant with math, but as if nature was hell-bent on compensating for her intelligence, she's one of the clumsiest people I know. "You didn't have to bring all of this in by yourself. We're supposed to be helping each other set up our classrooms, not throwing our backs out the week before school starts."

"Oh please. I can handle carrying some boxes." She rolls her eyes at me as she sets the stack on my desk, trapping her pinkie in the process. "Ouch!"

LaTonya shakes her head as I try to hide my chuckle. She set herself up for that one. But as soon as we're both free of our boxes, she arches one perfect eyebrow and glances at my phone where it sits face down on one of the empty desks. "So what were you oh my god- ing?"

My coworkers are bound to find out about Maddox and our… whatever this is eventually, right? The assembly is about two weeks away. I suppose it won't hurt to spill the beans now. Twisting the end of my ponytail around my fingers, I unlock my phone and open Instagram. "I got follow requests from like half of the Minnesota Rogues this morning."

I'd met all of Maddox's teammates at the charity dinner, but mostly in passing. So I was pretty surprised to open my phone to find follow requests not only from Maddox and his closest friends but also the rookie Jess and Nev had been chatting up—Ryder Hanson—and six other guys on the team. Has he been talking about me to them? I know they have practice today, but I wasn't expecting that.

LaTonya whistles. "Seriously?"

I nod, holding the phone up so she can see for herself.

"Girl. Why are all those fine men trying to follow you? Don't get me wrong, I love you, but all you post lately are photos of your lattes and a few random snapshots of pretty scenery. Did you suddenly start posting racy selfies or something? I know we don't get paid a lot, but I have never heard of a single teacher keeping their job if the administration finds out they have an OnlyFans. Even if it's just feet pics. So if that's what you're doing…" Her dark eyes sparkle, her full lips twitching as she tries to suppress a sm ile. It doesn't last. Soon we're both cracking up. The idea of me posting naked pictures on the internet is so out there that I'm trying to imagine what my angle would be.

"Oh, god. Could you imagine? It would be photos of me fingering books or something. Maybe dressing up in period clothing to look like a character out of Pride and Prejudice and showing the barest hint of cleavage while trying to make a sexy face and totally failing."

She laughs even harder. "Do a sexy face right now. Show me what that would look like." So I do. And LaTonya finds this so hilarious that she doubles over in laughter. "Oh girl, you look like you just smelled a fart."

"Crap. That's embarrassing," I say through giggles.

It takes a minute for us both to catch our breath, then I tap the accept button on all the requests from Maddox's team. "No porn pics. I'm kinda seeing one of them."

"You're seeing a pro athlete?" Both of LaTonya's eyebrows rise, making her luminous brown skin wrinkle. "Damn, girl. Good for you. You deserve someone strong and sexy after putting up with that entitled man-child for so long."

I cough on a laugh. None of my coworkers liked Alex. They thought he was snobbish and aloof. Of course, they all tried their best to make him feel welcome and to make me feel they accepted him while we were together, but as soon as he broke up with me, the truth came out. They hated Alex. Universally.

"You want to see a picture of him?" I ask, already knowing her answer. I'm swiping through my photos from our hot air balloon date before LaTonya even says yes.

"What's his name?"

I hold the phone out to her. "Maddox. Maddox Graves. "

"Damn," she says. "I don't know a single thing about hockey, but if all the players look like this, count me in." She flips through more of the photos. "Did this man take you up in a hot air balloon?"

I nod, grinning like an idiot. It was the most romantic date anyone had ever taken me on. And then it was the most erotic. My lower belly clenches just thinking about how Maddox played my body like he was made to do it. My cheeks are warm, and my coworker smirks.

"Oh, he took you on more than one ride that night, didn't he?"

"I can neither confirm nor deny," I say. But I'm not fooling anyone. My cheeks hurt from smiling so wide, and I know they've got to be bright red.

"Riiiight," LaTonya says. "And why is half of his team requesting to follow you now?"

"I don't know. Maybe he was talking about me at practice today? I've hung out with three of them a couple times now, but I only briefly met the rest." I can't deny I'm curious to know what prompted this influx of requests from them.

As if thinking about it summons him, a text from Maddox flashes across my screen.

"Is that him?"

I nod, unlocking my phone.

Maddox

I made the mistake of showing photos from our date to the guys. They asked if you'd posted them on your Instagram account, and Griff saw your username when I tried to pull it up. It set off a chain reaction with half the team wanting to follow you. They all think you're cool, but they can be a lot. Sorry.

LaTonya not so subtly reads his text over my shoulder. "Well, that's adorable."

Laughing, I hold the phone to my chest. Because yeah, this text was adorable, but he's sent me some racy ones since giving me three orgasms in one night. And I don't need anyone else seeing a text like that.

My coworker chuckles. "Sorry. I'm being nosey. I'm going to unpack some boxes in my classroom. But I want to hear more about this." She gives me a little wave and a waggle of her eyebrows, and then I'm alone in my classroom. Just me, boxes of supplies, and my thundering heart.

Me

Don't be sorry. I think it's cute.

Maddox

I think you're cute.

Charmer

So why didn't you post any of the photos? I'm sure it would make your ex jealous.

My mind flashes back to seeing Alex's best friend, Jackson, at the charity dinner and all the uncomfortable feelings his appearance dredged up. Would posting romantic photos with Maddox make Alex jealous? Maybe. But I don't want to post something so meaningful for Alex's benefit. I realize I don't give a rat's ass about what Alex thinks of me. Or if he thinks of me at all. Truthfully, I think what I've actually been mourning these past five months is the life I thought I'd have and the dreams I built up when we were first together. Not the man himself. Because he's an ass.

Me

I don't want to make Alex jealous anymore.

Three little dots appear, disappear, and then pop back up a few seconds later.

Maddox

Oh. I see.

Panic arcs through me like lightning. I reread my text and realize Maddox has probably misunderstood what I mean.

Me

I don't want to make Alex jealous because I don't give a crap about Alex. See, I've gone out on a date with this really great guy, and I don't know where it's going, but he seems to have made me forget all about my ex.

Maddox

Is that so, Short-Stack?

Yep. And I wanted to post the photos, but I wasn't sure if this guy would be okay with that, and I was too chicken to ask him.

Well, unless the guy is a total idiot, he'd want to show the world that he spent an amazing evening with the most beautiful woman on the planet.

Did you post them?

No. I wanted to talk to you about it first. Dating anyone on the team can mean extra attention and scrutiny, but dating me…

I practically hold my breath, waiting for him to finish his sentence. When it comes, my heart aches for him.

Maddox

I know you don't believe what my ex-girlfriends said about me, but most people do. Dating me could mean a lot of curiosity and more than a little extra scrutiny. Not sure if it's worth it.

Reading between the lines, I hear what he's not saying.

I'm not sure if I'm worth it .

I don't give myself any time to think about it. Not that there's anything to think about. I know what it's like to wonder if you're worth the trouble, and I won't let him feel that way. Not on my account.

I pick a selfie where we both look undeniably happy. Our faces are lit with smiles, our eyes sparkle, and I'm leaning back against Maddox's broad chest. He's got his cheek resting on the top of my head. Uploading it to my Instagram account, I add a caption that reads: Most romantic night of my life. I don't know what made me more lightheaded—the altitude, or his touch. And then I hit share .

Me

Check my Insta now.

A minute goes by, and just as I'm starting to worry that I did something wrong, my phone rings.

"I made you lightheaded, huh?"

Chuckling, I hum my agreement. "Very. You seem to have that effect on me."

"I want to post one of the photos of us," he says. "I want to show you off. But I also want to keep you to myself a while longer." My heart squeezes at the quiet admission. "Is that selfish?"

"Not at all. That sounds like a good plan." And not just because I'm dreading the attention. But because this is all so very new, I worry the extra eyes will put a strain on something that could be good. As terrifying as it is to entertain that hope.

"How is setting up your classroom going?"

A few posters decorate the walls, and most of my desk is unpacked and organized, but there's still a lot left to do. It'll take me a few days to get things looking the way I want. "I'm off to a good start. I'll probably keep going for another hour, then take a lunch break. How's practice?"

"Done," Maddox tells me. "It was an early start. The guys and I will probably hit the weight room in a bit."

"Are you talking to Isla?" a muffled voice says in the background. It has an instant grin spreading across my face. Maddox says that he is, and Navarro speaks again. " Tell her, hey. And did you tell her about our first preseason game?"

"Not yet, man. I will."

"You'd better," Navarro warns him. Then louder, he says, "Later, Isla."

"Bye, Bash," I say, even though I doubt he can hear me. It earns a chuckle from Maddox.

"You're supposed to tell me about a preseason game?"

"Yeah. I was hoping you'd come." He sounds like he's not sure if I'll agree or not.

"Of course, I'll come. Just give me the details."

"I will. I'll text you all the information. Hey, I've got to do something. Call you later?"

Disappointment rises like floodwaters in me. I try to push the unwelcome sensation down. I need to get myself under control where Maddox Graves is concerned. He's consumed my thoughts since our date, and I need to focus on the start of the school year. I need to focus on my job and my students.

And I have to remind myself that we've gone on one real date. It's not like we're serious or even exclusively dating right now. At least, we haven't discussed that. I need to suppress my expectations and hopes before I end up hurt. Maddox is sweet and charming, and damn if he doesn't give the most mind-blowing oral, but I've grown a lot since I was a na?ve high school girl who fell in love with a boy way too quickly. I won't fall into that same trap with Maddox.

"Isla?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry. Definitely. Talk to you later."

"Yes, you will." We say goodbye, and despite my mind wandering to my insecurities about what this is with Maddox, I can't wipe the goofy grin off my face. And when he immediately sends me a text that reads, You take my breath away, too , I can't help hoping this relationship is different.

Because I may be terrified to give my heart to another person knowing they could break it, but deep down, there's nothing I want more than to be genuinely loved.

Maybe this is it. Maybe it's not. But I'll never know if I don't give him a chance.