Chapter 28

twenty-eight

MADDOX

"You look happy." Sebastian gives me a knowing look when I saunter into the locker room a few minutes before practice. We're gearing up to get on the ice today, and after just over a month of dryland training where we focused on weights and conditioning, I'm looking forward to lacing up. We all are. "I assume your date went well this weekend?"

I chuckle. Navarro's the only one who didn't spend yesterday harassing me. Wright and Byrne both texted me first thing in the morning and didn't shut up until I told them I'd fill them all in at practice. Not that they're getting all the details. I'd never betray Isla's trust and tell them about the things we got up to in her bed. "Yeah, man. It was pretty amazing."

"What was amazing?" Griffin rubs his bleary eyes. He looks like he just dragged himself out of bed. His golden hair is a tousled mess, and his shirt is on inside out. Byrne trails behind him, looking significantly more chipper.

"My date with Isla." I strip out of my street clothes and start putting on my gear.

"Dude, I've been waiting to hear all about it," Griffin says. He winces when Logan tosses his duffel bag on the bench in front of his locker with a loud thud. Of course, Byrne notices.

"Hungover? I told you to slow down last night."

"Whatever," Wright grumbles. He sets his own bag down more gingerly. "I was just trying to enjoy myself before the season starts."

Navarro chuckles. "Enjoying yourself this morning, bud?"

Griffin flips Bash off, wincing again when we all laugh. "You guys suck."

Byrne and Wright invited us all out last night, but Navarro had other plans and I stayed in to work on my ideas for the assembly at Isla's school. I may have also spent a good part of the night flirting with her over text. Not that the guys needed to know that.

"Seriously though," Navarro's voice is muffled as he pulls on his gear. He wears more of it than the rest of us as the goalie. "Was the hot air balloon ride a success?"

Unable to stop myself, I pull out my phone and open up the photos we took so I can show them like some lovesick fool. I'm starting to feel like some lovesick fool. I mean, I don't love Isla yet. That would be crazy. But I am kind of crazy about her.

My boys fawn over the photos, making little aww sounds. If someone were watching our interaction, they'd probably think the guys were giving me shit, but they're actually happy for me. They like Isla. And more importantly, they can tell I like her. Even though none of them have said anything about it yet, I know they're glad she's nothing like the other women I've dated since joining the team. They were there when Candace gave that bullshit interview. They saw what it did to me. And the thing about being on a hockey team is that the guys become family. You can't spend the better part of a year traveling with a group of guys and not grow close like that.

"You guys are so cute together," Wright coos like a weirdo. He clasps his hands under his chin and bats his eyelashes at me.

"So sweet, I have a toothache," Byrne agrees.

I snort-laugh. They can act like little shits all they want, but I know they mean it. They're happy for me.

Navarro rests his hand on my shoulder. "She's good for you. I haven't seen you this relaxed in over a year."

He's right. I hadn't thought about it in those terms, but I do feel looser. Like a Candace-sized weight has lifted off my shoulders. I'm happy and hopeful. Even though I love hockey more than almost anything else and I spend most of my time surrounded by guys that are close as brothers to me, I've been lying to myself about not wanting a real relationship. I glance at my closest friends and the dopey smiles and wistful looks on their faces and wonder if we've all been lying to ourselves when it comes to women.

I've been telling myself I don't need anyone, Wright and Byrne tell themselves they only need casual hookups, and Navarro… well, I'm not totally sure what he's been telling himself, honestly. He flirts with women an d once in a blue moon he'll hook up with someone, but the guy's always holding himself back. Like he's pining over someone he's never told us about. I know he's afraid to let a woman in, same as the rest of us, but he's more tight-lipped and reserved, and I've never gotten the full story.

Maybe I need to get him drunk and try to pry it out of him. Out of the four of us, he's arguably the best, not to mention the most stable and emotionally intelligent. That means we tend not to worry about him. But maybe we should.

"You gonna post those on your Instagram?" Griffin asks as he laces up his skates.

"I don't know, should I? Would that be too forward? I mean, thousands of people would see it, and I don't know if she's there yet, you know?"

Bash's lips twist to the side as he considers it. "Did she post any of them?"

I hadn't looked. After our date, I'd been so wrapped up in planning for the assembly and figuring out how to blow her away that I'd done little else. "Let's see."

Opening the app on my phone, I type in her username. "Crap. I forgot she set her account to private after people started commenting on her photo of us together."

"So request to follow her," Wright says, pulling out his own phone. He looks over my shoulder to see Isla's username, then types it in. "Found her." He taps the follow request button with a grin.

"What's her username?" Logan asks him. Soon he and Navarro have also requested to follow her.

Well, now I'll look like an asshole if I don't also send her a follow request. I tap the button on my screen and stare at it for a second, like my impatience will make her immediately see the requests and accept them. She will accept them, right?

"Dude. Why do you look nervous?" Griffin claps me on the back.

"What if she doesn't want us all following her?"

"Did you guys have a good time?" he asks, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah. Really good."

"Your face is looking a little dreamy there, Graves," Logan says with a smirk. "So is it safe to assume you took your relationship to the next level?"

"I'm not telling you guys what we did," I growl.

Logan holds his palms in the air. "Not asking you to. I'm just saying that Isla doesn't seem like a woman who's into random hookups with no strings attached. So if she let you get any further than the cute little flirting you two were doing at the auction dinner, I think it's pretty safe to assume she has real feelings for you."

He's right, of course. I could tell that much after our first disastrous date. And there is something there between us. I'm not an idiot. I just don't know what she thinks this is. She may not even want a relationship at all, let alone one with me. I know the public attention made her uncomfortable when her photo of us went viral, and that's nothing compared to the attention an actual relationship with me could bring. Thanks to Candace and Georgia and their bullshit stories about how I'm some heart-breaking jerk who loves to win a woman's heart so I can enjoy smashing it into smithereens later. I'll need to talk to her about all of this, but a big part of me wants to hold off until after the assembly at her school .

I've got plans to win her heart. And help a bunch of kids.

"What's taking everyone so long?" Coach shouts, striding into the locker room. "You guys forget how to lace up your skates after a couple of months off? Get moving!"

The whole team replies with a chorus of Yes, Coach .

"Seriously," Navarro says as we all tromp down the hallway to the rink, "I know you're gun-shy after everything, but Isla's not like that. I think we can all agree on that. What are you so scared of?"

I don't even have to think about it. The words are out of my mouth in an instant. "I'm scared she'll decide I'm not good enough for her. That she wants more than just some dumb jock."

Logan smacks me upside the head. "Don't be an idiot. You're more than just a dumb jock, and you know it."

"What if I am the kind of guy they said I was?" I ask as my blades hit the ice. We make our way over toward our coaches.

"We're starting easy," our assistant coach, Kyle Fry shouts. "Passing and puck control drills today. Navarro and Black, in the crease." Assistant coach Fry claps his hands, and everyone moves. Navarro holds back for a beat to hold my gaze.

"If you were anything like they said, you wouldn't be so worried. And you wouldn't be into an English teacher who doesn't take your shit. I love you, Graves, you know that. So hear what I'm about to say with that in mind. Get your head out of your ass. Love is always a risk. You can run away from it, or you can play to win. No one can make that call but you. "

"I'm not in love," I say to his back as he skates toward his goal.

"Dude." Griffin rolls his eyes. "Keep telling yourself that."

"I'm not." The thing is, I could see myself getting there all too quickly.

And that scares the hell out of me.