Chapter 42

Walkinginto the hospital's oncology ward, I can't help but grimace. "Hospitals are officially on my list of least favorite places." The harsh fluorescent lights do nothing to lift my mood.

Gabe glances at me with concern as we walk."How are you feeling?" Gabe asks. "Did you take your medication?"

I give him a faint smile. "You're adorable."

"That doesn't answer my question, Ameline." Gabe's tone is serious. He might seem like a very calm guy, but when it comes to my health and things that matter, he can get very bossy.

Knowing that he won't drop the subject until I assure him that I indeed took my medications I nod. "You have to stop worrying so much about me. I'm totally fine and even brought my meds in case we stay for a long period."

He smiles at me. "Good. Jude will bring some snacks while we figure out the setting," he states.

At the mention of his brother, I bite my tongue, the memory of his conversation with Jude souring my stomach. I want to ask if he meant everything, he told his brother. Seemed like I'm just there because I have nowhere to go, and I need help. But admitting that I eavesdropped will lead to a discussion I'm not ready to have with him.

Not for now. Still, the bitterness lingers on my tongue. I don't want to doubt his intentions, but did he marry me out of pity like Jude said?

Honestly, I need some alone time to think. Not only about him, but Mom too. She's not going to make it. In fact, the doctor said she has only a few weeks to live. It's like I just recovered my mother, but only to lose her again.

"You can go home," I dismiss him. "Your brother is in town, and I assume you have a lot to catch up on. I'll figure this out by myself."

"Ame, we're in this together," he states, taking my hand. "I understand you have a hard time accepting help from others, but I'm your husband."

Before I can protest, we arrive at Mom's room. There are nurses and medical personnel moving things around. One of them glances at me. "Can we help you?"

"I'm Ameline Lewis, her daughter," I state.

"Right, the doctor should be here soon. We're waiting for instructions. Either moving her to the next wing so she can start hospice care or are you taking her home?"

I frowned, wondering if I should take her home instead, but then I remembered that I don't have a place, and maybe doing so would be an inconvenience for Gabe.

"Miss Lewis." A doctor wearing scrubs approaches us, her eyes weary yet kind behind thin-rimmed glasses. "I'm Dr. Thompson. I'm afraid your mother's condition is deteriorating faster than anticipated."

"But just days ago, she mentioned that with a marrow . . ." My shoulders slump as my voice trails. Even if that could've saved her no one was willing to give her that.

"Is there anything we can do? There has to be something," I mumble, glancing at Mom who looks so little in the big hospital bed.

"I'm afraid it's too late. All you can do now is keep her comfortable with her family." She informs me glancing from Gabe to me. "We're waiting to see if you'll require an ambulance to take her home or if we're moving her."

My heart plummets to the pit of my stomach, and I feel Gabe's gentle squeeze in response.

"Her organs are shutting down," the doctor continues softly. "We're doing everything we can, but she doesn't have much time left." Her words hang heavy in the air, making my knees weak.

"We'll make the necessary arrangements, so she's comfortable at home," Gabe states.

"And you are?" Dr. Thompson frowns with confusion.

"Gabriel Decker. Ameline's husband," he says, extending his hand. Then kisses my temple. "Let me call Jude to see where he's at with the arrangements."

"Thank you," I say instead of telling him that I can stay here in the hospital with Mom.

"Can . . . Can I see her?" My voice quivers.

"Of course," Dr. Thompson nods, gesturing toward the inside.

I hesitate at the threshold. The sight of Mom, so frail and diminished, is a jagged shard of glass in my heart.

"Ameline," she murmurs. I move closer, taking her cool hand into mine, trying to imprint the feel of her skin, making a memory before she leaves me.

"Mom . . ." I start, but the words dissolve into tears.

She gathers a breath. "I'm glad you're here."

"Of course I am. Where else would I be?" I respond, trying to sound cheery. "Gabe and I are thinking about taking you home for the holidays. We'll be able to get a tree, and you can help me decorate it."

"That sounds lovely," she says. I caress her forehead before kissing it.

I don't know why she abandoned me, and I should be upset at her, but I'm not anymore. She's dying, and maybe during her last days, we can create something that will become a lasting memory. Not everything has to be sad, does it?

"Maybe you can give me some old family recipes, so I can prepare them for dinner. Make some new traditions," I continue.

Mom gives me a sad smile. If she wasn't so weak, I would ask her to give me at least a few answers. But maybe it's okay that I don't know how everything happened, just that at least we were able to be together one last time before she left.

"Hey," Gabe enters the room. "We have everything set. The ambulance will take her in a couple of hours. We're using the library as her room. The hospital bed should arrive soon along with all the medical equipment she requires. Aunt Aspen found us a couple of nurses that will be able to help us around the clock."

I walk toward him and hug him really tight. "Thank you for being so kind," I mumble.

He kisses the top of my head. "Ame, it's not kindness. I mean it when I say that I will do anything for you. Sorry that you have to go through this."

And I hope it's true, that he loves me and that he does this for me, not out of pity.