Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

CAUGHT OUT

T he big vampire from the Dome is dressed in black, the tattoos on his arms covered, only a few curving lines visible at the neck of his shirt. He moves like a shadow, despite his size.

‘Ira.' Kyle keeps his voice low. ‘How are things?'

Ira spreads his hands wide. ‘Things, my friend, are not so good.'

Kyle has his arm back, holding me against him. I manage to lean my head around. ‘Hello,' I say, my voice cracked with emotion.

Ira pauses in his approach, his eyes widening. ‘My lady! Is it so?'

‘Er, yes. It's me.' I push against Kyle's arm and he lets me go. I pull the hem of my dress down, wiping my face with my other hand.

‘What are you doing here? It's not safe for you.'

‘I-I wanted to see. To… bear witness.' I gulp the words, stumbling on the long grass.

‘It is a dark thing to witness, my lady. I salute your bravery.'

‘I-I saw, the boy, the one who, he was?—'

‘Yes.' There is deep sorrow in Ira's voice. ‘He should not have been here.'

‘But, was he, I mean, how could he be a?—'

‘My lady, there is more happening here tonight than you know. In fact, it's best if you leave, as soon as you can.'

‘We were just about to.' Kyle slides an arm around my waist.

Ira folds his massive arms. ‘Taking her home?'

Kyle stares at Ira. Then he nods, once. ‘Yes, home.' He scoops me into his arms.

Ira comes closer, laying one massive hand on my arm. ‘I'd like to send you a gift, my lady. Will you be home tomorrow eve?'

‘Er, yes?' I sniff again. ‘I mean, thank you, that's very kind.' Odd, but kind.

‘I'll deliver it myself, then.' He smiles, squeezing my arm briefly. It's surreal.

‘We need to go.' Kyle steps back from Ira, who releases my arm.

‘Safe travels, my lady,' he says. ‘May darkness protect you.'

I nod. ‘Th-thank you. And the same to you.'

Kyle starts to run but reaction has set in, a deep trembling through my whole body. I can't control it, try as I might, gasping for breath. Kyle slows again, coming to a stop.

Trees are tall around us, moon filtering through their branches to cast a lattice of shadow on the cold ground. Kyle sets me down and I slide like a jellyfish down the front of his body, curling into a ball, trying to pull all the shaking back inside myself.

Kyle kneels beside me, rubbing my back. I shake so much my teeth chatter, and I barely understand what he's saying. I suck in a breath, managing to control myself enough so I can hear him properly.

‘—need to keep moving, Emelia. I'll keep you safe, I promise. It's all right, you're okay.' Is it all right? I think it's pretty fucking far from all right, to be honest. My world is upside down and I'm lying in a forest, shaking like the proverbial leaf. ‘Please, my love, please.'

Did he just call me his love?

I know. I have bigger issues at the moment. But that… well. My shaking subsides and I roll over onto my back. When I open my eyes Kyle is leaning over me.

‘S-sorry,' I croak.

‘I'm sorry, too,' he says, sorrow in his silver eyes. ‘Sorry you had to see that.'

I roll my head from side to side. ‘I asked you to take me.' The image of the boy, the fear in his eyes and Mistral ripping him apart, flashes into my head and I start crying again, snuffling and huffing out breaths, my back arching against the cold leaves.

Kyle gathers me close, one hand stroking my hair. ‘Hush now,' he says, his lips soft on my cheek. ‘Let me take you home.'

I clutch his jacket. ‘I can't go back there,' I say.

‘What?'

‘Don't make me go back there.'

‘What are you talking about? C'mon, Emelia, we need to get out of the woods. There could be Reaper gangs out tonight.'

I don't care. I'm drowning anyway. What's one death compared to another, compared to the twenty I just witnessed at the hands of my family.

‘I don't want to be Raven.' The words spill from me.

Kyle's eyes widen. He shakes me, gently. ‘What do you mean?'

‘I don't want it!' My voice rises. ‘All it seems to mean is death and sorrow and responsibility, choices I don't want to have to make, dealing with people like Mistral, that murdering bastard! I don't want any of it!' I'm sobbing again, my throat raw. ‘You saw them, you saw what they just did! Those people weren't rebels, they were just humans, like me. How can I be part of something like that?'

Kyle's arms tighten around me. ‘I know,' he says. ‘I know.' There's a tinge of blood in his silver eyes, and I can feel tremors running through him. ‘But I have to take you home tonight.'

I push at him. ‘Aren't you listening to me? I can't go back there! I don't want that life anymore!' Sorrow rakes me, acid sharp, at the thought of my mother, my beautiful gentle mother, unleashing death. The hands that cradled me, killing some other woman's child. ‘I had… I have a plan, I-I need y-your help to get away and we can just…'

‘A plan?'

‘To go to the Safe Zone. And then keep moving. Live my life as a human so I don't… so I'm not…' I choke up again.

‘Shhh.' Kyle strokes my hair, staring into the night. I wonder what he can see.

‘Where can we go?' I'm so tired. I just want to get into bed and stay there forever. I hope there's somewhere nearby.

‘I have to take you home,' he says again. ‘Wait—' he grabs my hand ‘—just listen to me. This isn't just about us.'

‘Please,' I whisper. ‘Please help me.'

He kisses me, gentle. ‘Do you really not want it? To be Raven? Even with all you could be?' His gaze is intent on me, a line between his eyebrows.

I nod.

‘I'll help you, then. But not tonight. Nick is still on the estate, as is Janine.'

I frown. Then I remember. Nick, the guard who helped us. And Janine must be the blood dancer whose dress I'm wearing. I look down.

‘Yes,' Kyle says. ‘Exactly. We have to go back tonight, before they get caught.' He touches my face, his hand trailing along my cheek.

I nod. ‘All right. And then we leave. If you'll take me.'

‘I'll take you,' he murmurs, kissing me again. ‘But we have to do it properly. So let me take you home now, and then we can plan.'

‘Y-you promise?' My teeth are chattering again, and I'm finding it hard to form the words. ‘You'll help me escape?'

‘If it's what you truly want.' He seems sad for a moment, his gaze dropping. ‘Wherever you want to go, wherever you want to be, I'll go there and be there with you. But now, we need to go home.'

I don't have the energy to argue anymore. Kyle seems to take my silence as acquiescence. He stands, picking me up at the same time. ‘C'mon, hold tight.'

I uncurl the fingers of one hand, snaking it around his neck. He starts to run. I hold on as best I can. We speed into the night, and there's a floating sensation as we clear the fence surrounding the estate. Home. I'm home.

I don't want to be here. Don't want to be any part of what Raven represents. I don't want to see my parents, either. I just want to go straight to my room, grab my bag, and head over the fence once more. Kyle is still running, moving swiftly between the trees. We're so close, I can see the walls of the house through the branches. Almost there.

Almost.

‘Halt!'

Shitshitshit.

Panic thrums through me, a boost of adrenaline. There's a whooshing noise and a rattle of branches. Several guards appear. Kyle sets me down, then steps back, his arms raised. A guard grabs him, putting him in an arm lock. Double shit.

‘My lady!' The other guards bow, realising who I am. Bertrand isn't among them, thank darkness – he'd see through me in a second.

‘Let him go.'

The guard holding Kyle hesitates before releasing him. ‘My lady, we've been searching for you.'

Shit. I'm trembling, close to dropping. But I need to get us through this.

‘You have?' I hit just the tone I want, between surprised and slightly annoyed at their presumption. ‘Was I missing?'

Kyle coughs. I try not to look at him.

‘Your mother has asked for you.'

Oh my god and darkness, my parents are back already.

‘I've only been for a run on the estate. With Kyle.' Shit. I don't need to justify myself.

‘But none of us could find you, and?—'

‘Well, maybe you should have looked more thoroughly.' I fix the guard who spoke with a look. A look that says do not question me . It seems to work.

‘Of course, my lady. I'm sorry.'

I relax slightly. ‘As am I. I didn't mean to worry anyone. Kyle, if you will?' I'm all icy politeness, and hope he gets it.

‘My lady.' Kyle picks me up again, reaching the looming bulk of the house in seconds, the open door a pale rectangular glow. Two guards are waiting there, more stationed in the shadows along the portico. Kyle puts me down at the top of the steps and we enter the foyer. Bertrand is waiting, his huge arms folded. I sigh.

‘My lady.' He bows, then straightens, his gaze travelling over us both. His eyes narrow.

‘I'm going to my room.' I start for the stairs.

‘Your mother is waiting.'

I stop, my mouth trembling. I stare at Bertrand.

‘For both of you,' he says, his voice gentle. ‘In the library.' He pauses. ‘Perhaps you'd like to get changed before seeing her?'

Shit. I realise I'm still wearing the borrowed dress. And Kyle isn't in his guard uniform. He realises at the same time as I do, his eyes widening slightly. ‘If you'll excuse me,' he says, then is gone in a flash.

I turn to Bertrand, trying to seem dignified. His arms are still folded, concern on his face. But all I say is, ‘Of course.'

I change quickly, throwing the borrowed dress in the bottom of my wardrobe. Bertrand, who's been waiting outside my door, escorts me to the library. I'm so weary I can barely put one foot in front of the other, but force myself to keep going. I need to get through this, then go. The large doors are ajar, my parents' personal guards standing either side. Anger rises. A black meadow and a boy on a rock flashes into my mind. I hold onto it as I step into the room.

Well, shit.

My mother and father are here.