Chapter - Eighteen

Cold winds began to blow through the institute as the end of the year neared closer. The world seemed more normal than it had ever felt. All my life I'd felt like an outcast because I could see things that other ‘normal' people couldn't, such as the shadows of people who didn't exist – a woman with white hair and a man with hungry eyes that reminded me of lava. Everything that had once been a riddle felt like it was slotting into place, and as Felix and I poured over every book, I came closer to understanding myself than I ever had. In the days that followed our evening together in my room, we spent a little less time in the library.

One day, we went to the mundane markets held in the city square for a morning off. When we returned, Volker was standing in my bedroom, dressed like a peacock. His billowing cape was cerulean blue and he carried his favourite cane, fox skull and all. He raised his head to gaze at us as Felix put down the bag of knick-knacks I'd bought. Volker dipped his head forward in a short bow.

‘My little youngblood!' he cried. ‘What a good day it is to see you again.'

‘You made it,' I said, returning a smile. ‘When did you get here? Calum did mention the other day you were arriving.'

‘I know. So very sorry I couldn't see you earlier, but the council needed to discuss some things with me.'

‘Too bad,' Felix said, sighing. ‘We were having a nice time without you.'

I flushed at the bemused grin Volker gave Felix. ‘Missed me, cupcake?' Volker asked him.

‘I was wasting away without you,' Felix answered. He reached for my hand and our fingers intertwined.

‘I see you managed just fine,' Volker said, mocking him. ‘This is new, but to be expected. Tabitha does not see what others do.'

‘Um … thank you?' My brow wrinkled at the backhanded words.

Felix stared at Volker. His eyes were fierce. ‘What are you here for?'

Volker waved a hand. ‘Where was I? Oh yes. Missing you both. Guess we can skip the rest of my speech. I was going to bring up how I had discovered some unordinary findings in regard to your parents, but clearly you two lovesick cold ones would prefer to mock me.--'

‘You found something?' I said.

‘Perhaps. What am I owed for my knowledge?'

‘Don't start with me. What did you find?'

‘I found many things. For instance, I may have found out where you were born.'

‘Which is where?'

Volker gave me an uneasy smile. ‘The council believe I shouldn't tell you.'

‘What? … Why?' I frowned at him as he took a peach from the box we'd bought and bit into it. ‘Don't ignore me. Please Volker, you have to tell me.'

‘It is a bad idea. Shouldn't have come, really. Couldn't help myself. Always a people pleaser, I am.'

‘Volker!'

‘Yes alright!' he snapped back at me, his hair flashing from purple to orange. ‘I get it. You're an impatient youngblood, aren't you? Should have guessed it. You must get it from your—' He clammed up, his eyes widening in alarm.

I caught on immediately. ‘My what?' I asked quickly, watching Volker shake his head and stalk the room.

‘Oh, it's a no from me.'

‘What do you know that you're not telling us?' Felix said as if he had read my thoughts.

‘This is exactly why I don't muddle in youngblood business!' Volker bellowed, frightening us all. ‘You're just so tricky. All the blood theories and legends of birth and sorcery! It's just too much to dwell on. Let's move on from this and never speak of it. I'm too troubled.'

I cautiously moved towards him, noting his worried expression. ‘Volker?' He looked at me. ‘Please tell me where I was born.'

He rubbed his face. ‘Fine. But please refrain from telling the council. They'll be quite cross.' When I tilted my head, he rolled his eyes and answered, ‘You were born in Greece.'

‘Greece?' I echoed. ‘Am I Greek?'

‘I only know of your birth location, not your heritage. There has been little in the way of progress.'

‘What more do you know?' Felix asked. ‘Anything about Tabitha's hair?'

I liked the sound of my name coming from his mouth and I smiled up at him. He shot me a withering glare but it didn't stop my smile.

‘The hair is definitely a beacon, we've decided,' Volker said.

‘What colour is my real hair?' I asked him. ‘Surely you remember.'

‘No.' Volker shook his head before saying, ‘When you came to me as an infant, you didn't have much in the way of hair, sweetheart.'

‘I like your hair colour,' Felix said, mouth twitching when I flushed in response. ‘It's cute.'

Volker sighed, weariness making his shoulders slump. ‘Young love seems so exhausting. What nonsense to put up with.'

Felix raised his eyes skyward. ‘Just tell us what you know.'

‘Picky, picky, picky—'

‘Volker!' I said again.

‘Alright! Calm your fiery little self. Your dreams of those folk you see are not dreams, Tabitha. They are memories. The council and I believe your birth parents have been searching and watching out for you since giving you to Angie.'

‘Can we find them?' I asked him.

Volker exhaled sharply. ‘Not with ease. We don't have much in the way of leads as to who they are. But we are sure someone watches you – perhaps it's your birth parents.'

‘What else? Anything?' I asked.

Volker raised his eyebrows. ‘Trying to kick me out, are we?'

‘No, I would just like to know everything I can so we can go to the library and search.'

Volker appeared to sour despite my words. He stalked to a briefcase nestled on the armchair. It was heavily glamoured and my eyes swam with unshed tears as he plucked it from the seat. Felix wore a half-amused, half-concerned expression as he asked the warlock, ‘What more do you know?'

‘Nothing you two seem to care about. You're more than happy to kick me out like some unwanted chest of drawers on the sidewalk.' Volker held the briefcase loosely in one hand, his cane in the other.

Felix loosened his shoulders. ‘Volker, please.'

Volker stopped and stared at the floor.

I stood next to Felix, my hand grasping his tightly, eyes on Volker's slick hair and overconfident aura, bracing myself for the worst.

Volker exhaled heavily through his nostrils. ‘It's hardly anything. I shouldn't bother.'

‘What is it? Tell me, please.' I let go of Felix's hand to grasp the warlock's arm. ‘I have to know.'

‘The council has another library, separate to the one you've been using. It is in the same wing but hidden behind a bookcase. I am unsure which one. But you must get in and search. There is a lot of hidden knowledge awaiting your arrival. They call it the Hall of Accords.'

‘How will I know I've found it?'

Volker smiled, his eyes softening like melting sweets. ‘Because it will call to you, little youngblood.'

???

The next day passed slowly, almost dream-like. I bit into two blood bags during lunch as Felix ate steak, almost raw. Then we holed up in my bedroom and waited till evening. When night fell, we gathered our sweaters and slunk into the empty hallway.

We tiptoed along the marbled floors to the library, Felix scouting ahead. At this time of night, we had to be careful not to get caught. Ignoring the elevator that would creak and groan and give us away, Felix slipped his hand into mine and we climbed the stairs to the library. We slipped inside and closed the doors without so much as the wood squeaking.

Felix pressed a finger to his mouth before leaning down to whisper in my ear. ‘We'll start here.'

‘Where?' I whispered back, my eyes searching the dark room.

He jutted his chin towards the first bookcase. ‘Look for cracks between the joints. I'll take the left-hand side.'

He pulled away and kissed my cheek, as though it was the most natural thing to do. His lips were warm and soft. I felt my heart yearn for him as he pulled away and gave me a cocky wink. I made my way to the other side of the room, shaking away the dizziness I often felt after a close encounter with Felix.

We worked in almost complete silence for what felt like hours, running our fingers along the cracks in the shelving and tugging at any unusually placed book.

Felix had travelled faster than me down the vast room so I found him leaning against our usual table just as the sun was beginning to peak in through the windows. He held out his arms and I sank deep into his chest, wrapping my arms low behind him. He kissed the top of my head and sighed into my hair. ‘Every night until we find it, we'll come back.'

‘Promise?'

‘Absolutely, baby.'

I drew my head up, my chin on his chest. He peered down at me, kissing my nose and making me blush.

‘You're sweet,' I told him.

‘Only for you,' Felix answered. ‘Don't tell anyone else or I'll be forced to commit homicide.'

‘No murder, please.'

‘Can't hold me to that.' He chuckled and kissed my cheeks.

I grinned up at him, squishing myself into him further. ‘You're a good boyfriend, Fifi.'

Felix stilled. ‘What did you call me?'

I frowned a little. ‘Boyfriend?'

‘Uh huh.'

‘That's … what you are?'

His mouth exploded into a wide grin before he kissed me, hard and fast. I dove headfirst into the kiss, letting him widen my jaw as his tongue met mine. He kissed me like he had all the time in the world, like nobody else mattered outside these four walls. When it was just us like this, he was so relaxed and kind and gentle. He would press lazy kisses to the underside of my throat, his breathing slow and steady, like he was never in a hurry. It was like he wanted to keep it a secret only we shared. And every time, I melted into him.

‘I like it,' he murmured against my mouth, pulling back a fraction to speak. I felt his canines sharp on my bottom lip, ‘when you call me boyfriend.'

A giggle slipped out. ‘You're my boyfriend, Fifi.'

His features morphed into a fake glare. ‘You know, you're the only one who can get away with calling me that insufferable nickname.'

‘A privilege I will gladly accept,' I said, kissing him again.

My lips became swollen and bruised as he continued to kiss me as the sun rose behind the stained-glass windows, saturating the room with colour. We were lost within our kiss and the taste of each other.

The library door slammed.

Felix pushed me backwards and out of his arms. With the warmth of his body gone, the cold hit me square in the chest. Our eyes went to the door where Calum stood, peering at both of us. He sauntered closer, crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes at me. I threw him a sheepish grin.

Felix adopted a bored expression as Calum swooped in. ‘How long have you been standing there?'

Calum took no notice and looked at me instead.

‘Hey Cal,' I said, my voice shaking a little. ‘Wasn't expecting you.'

He raised his eyebrows. ‘What happened?' he asked me bluntly.

‘And a good morning to you too,' Felix said nonchalantly but Calum stood his ground. ‘Is something wrong?'

‘Unsurprisingly, yes,' Calum asked. ‘There is some bad juju going on in here. You two look like you're trying to hide a dead body. And if you are, I'm personally offended I wasn't invited to join the homicide squad.'

I forced a smile. ‘Guess you caught us.'

Calum didn't appear fazed.

Felix rolled his eyes. ‘Would you stop staring at us?'

‘Sure. When you tell me what's going on.'

‘Nothing is going on,' Felix and I said in unison.

‘Something is going on. I'm not as dumb as I look.'

‘You look dumb,' Felix replied, clicking his tongue. ‘Forget it, Calum.'

‘Incredible comeback. Come on. Fill me in.' Calum scowled at me. ‘You two were practically dry humping in the council library.'

Felix's cheeks flushed pink. ‘You are insufferable–'

‘I knew it,' Calum said, talking over the top of his brother. ‘Of course I knew it. You think it doesn't smell like sexual tension in here? I heard Fifi's blood pumping from the goddamn sidewalk.'

‘Shut up,' Felix said.

‘It's just, I didn't think I'd see this day. I thought it was more likely I'd be eaten by an eel than see Fifi so smitten.'

‘How many eels?' Felix asked.

‘Don't,' I said to Calum to stop him from answering. I turned to Felix. ‘And you. Don't encourage him.'

Felix shot me one of his trademark withering looks, but his twinkling eyes told me he didn't mean it. ‘Sorry.'

‘Better.'

Calum was holding a hand to his chest, looking between us with bright eyes and a small pout.

‘What?' I asked him.

He let out a happy sigh. ‘I feel like I just watched my son graduate from anger management classes.'

‘That's an oddly specific feeling,' I said. ‘You've clearly never been a father.'

‘Clearly.'

Felix let out a small groan. ‘Can we leave please, Tabs?'

‘And ignore what I'm here for?' Calum scoffed at his brother. ‘I don't think so. Tabitha's coming with me.'

‘What for?' I asked him.

‘Well, for instance, I'm a little worried about what's on your neck.'

I raised a hand to the hickey Felix had left on my neck from the other evening. I'd been covering it with makeup but hadn't worried about it for our search for a mysterious hidden hall. I tried to think of a way around this conversation.

‘Did he drink from you again?' Calum asked. ‘Cause if he did, I'm happy to begin my career in serial killing.'

‘Like you have anyone you'd kill,' Felix said, his voice dripping with mockery.

Calum shrugged. ‘I've got a few enemies. I'll start with Dave from seventh grade. He took my favourite gel pen. And I don't forget that kind of betrayal.'

‘It's not a drinking scar; it's a hickey.'

‘From you?'

‘Yours truly.'

‘Any youngblood powers kick in when you kiss? Can Tabs like, sense danger when you make out? Or use telepathy?'

Felix huffed in exasperation. ‘Why can't you go bother someone else?'

‘Alright,' I said, breaking in between the play fight. ‘Calum, I'll go with you.' A blush stained my throat and cheeks as I asked him, ‘Can you just, uh, wait out in the hall?'

Calum beamed. ‘Alright. Like, that's not suspicious at all. You'll find me outside. I'll be feeding the sparrows and thinking about my love for the Lord. Carry on, heathens.'

He left, whistling a cheerful tune which echoed down the hallway outside the library.

Felix gave me a cheeky grin and crossed the room to wrap his arms around my waist, a soft smile playing over his face. And then he ducked his head, kissing me slowly.

‘Stay with Calum,' he mumbled against my mouth. ‘Please.'

My eyelids fluttered as I hummed in satisfaction. ‘Is everything okay?'

‘Course.' He kissed the corner of my mouth. ‘Just stay with the baby boomer, would you?'

‘Felix—'

‘Nothing's wrong.'

When he drew away, he gave me a look that I could never resist. Not when his cheeks were tinted and there was a softness in his eyes that I only ever found directed at people he cared about. And when he graced me with that look, I melted.

‘I promise you. I'm just a worrier and I want you safe. I'll see you when you get back.'

My anxiety lessened. ‘Okay. I won't wander. My butt is stuck to the boomer's for the whole evening.'

‘Not even for a second.'

‘Can I at least get designated bathroom breaks?'

‘Brat,' he said and sighed before kissing my cheek.

I shoved him gently away from me. ‘Later, asshole.'

He winked and my pulse spiked. ‘See you soon, Mortal Annoyance.'