9. Adrianna

9

ADRIANNA

T he click of the door shutting behind me offers no refuge. I'm tense, wound tight with a bundle of emotions that I can't decipher enough to try and squash them.

I may have just placed an even bigger target on my back, one of my own doing with my reckless actions toward the dean herself, but I refuse to regret it. I won't falter. I won't show fear. I won't roll over for them anymore. Not after they put my family's safety in jeopardy. The same family that encourages me to take a calmer approach. My father's words of wisdom tingle the edge of my mind, but I'm done listening to the sensible option right now.

A bell rings, announcing the start of my first class, and I curse under my breath, straightening before I head down the hallway. I don't even make it to the corner to turn toward my classroom before I hear my name. The deep tone of a man makes me pause, but I quickly shake away my cloudy thoughts and turn to find Fairbourne heading toward me.

I can't stop myself from peering around him to make sure Bozzelli isn't also there, and I'm relieved to find him alone.

He nods for me to continue. "Let's not hang around long enough for her to change her mind," he mutters, falling into step beside me.

My eyebrows rise in question as I look up at him. He looks exhausted. The man needs a good night's sleep. Multiple, if the bags under his eyes are anything to go by. He looks about as shitty as I feel.

"Change her mind on what?" I ask when he doesn't immediately expand on his statement, earning a soft smile as he sighs.

"On letting us walk out of the damn office."

"She can't?—"

"She can do whatever she pleases, Addi. Her chances of receiving any repercussions are slim to none; don't forget that," he warns, uncertainty making his eyebrows furrow.

"Why did she call me in there to talk about Vallie? I acted in self-defense. Is Vallie going to get questioned about this too?" Anger vibrates through my veins as I keep my gaze locked straight ahead. The few students that fill the hallways step aside, clearly sensing the fuck off vibes that dance over my skin.

"I think we both already know the answer to that." There's a hint of humor in Fairbourne's tone that catches me off guard. When I look at him, I find a huge grin stretching over his face, which is a stark contrast to the man who just followed me out of Bozzelli's office. I tilt my head in question, and he takes the hint. "Of all the Reagans before you, I swear, that was the best show of defiance I've ever seen. If your father were here, his jaw would be dragging along the floor in awe," he muses, making my heart skip a beat as I blink up at him.

"My father would likely give me a lecture about remaining calm and collected," I correct, and he shakes his head.

"There's a time and place for calm and collected, and there's a time and place for strength and defiance. You definitely have the gift of understanding when each is needed." I gape at him, speechless, as his words wash over me. "If you acted calm and collected in that room, you would have given her the upper hand, something she's had enough of, don't you agree?"

I nod, still unable to find my tongue as we come to a stop outside the class I need to be in. My lips twist as I peer up at him, a glimmer of pride shimmering in his eyes, and I don't know how to accept it. Distracting from the conversation, I redirect the topic to him.

"Do you want me to remove your kiss of death?"

His smile softens, no longer reaching his eyes as he shakes his head. "There will be a time and place for that too, and I don't think this is it yet."

"Soon," I promise, and he nods.

"Soon." He reaches a hand toward me in what almost looks like an attempt at an embrace, but I don't move and he quickly retracts his arm. "Let me explain to the professor why you're late so you don't have any trouble," he offers, turning on his heels and entering the room without a moment's pause, leaving me to scurry in after him.

My mind is still whirling from his comments as my gaze lands on Raiden's. The red cloak draped over his shoulders should be the only red flag I need with this guy, but it seems I have the ability to wave it away too easily.

"Are you okay?" he mouths, jaw tight as he rakes his eyes over the length of me a few times.

"I'm fine," I grumble, reminding myself that I definitely still hate his ass. One single thought of Nora and my heart is tight and drenched in horror, reaffirming my feelings toward him.

Flora gives me a slight wave, and I remember that she has no idea of everything that's happened in such a short span of time. It's a conversation I'm not dreading either. I know she will be the support I need, but not until I've been the support she needs. I haven't forgotten the beginning of the week and the weird vibe between her and Arlo.

"Take a seat, Miss Reed," the professor states as Fairbourne leaves the room, and I do just that, nestling between Brody and Kryll while avoiding both of their gazes.

Brody's arm instantly slinks around the back of my chair while a tatted arm inches closer to me on the desk. It's instinctive to push back, demand space, and put distance between us, but instead, I keep my mouth shut. Their proximity is almost…calming. I don't know what to make of it, but I decide being surrounded by them isn't a bad thing.

The professor proceeds with the class, discussing what the castle signifies to the kingdom and how its importance is in all of our hearts, rooting us to Floodborn. The words go in one ear and straight out of the other. Nothing sticks as I feel myself shrink in the room.

From the mighty fae that just stood toe to toe with Bozzelli to a crippled student among the masses in a matter of minutes.

The feeling doesn't shift either, weighing heavier and heavier on my shoulders as one class floats into another. The four walls that surround me change, but the feeling inside of me doesn't. Anything on the agenda today in these classes is lost on me as one becomes another and another.

I feel more out of place now than I did when my true identity was revealed to the academy. I know things I didn't then. Things that changed me at my core. Things I don't want to admit but can't stop myself from acknowledging.

With every passing moment, I feel myself disconnecting from the world around me, and my mind starts to play nasty tricks, consuming every part of me.

My mother is a wolf.

A Kenner wolf.

My father a fae.

A royal fae.

I'm… what ?

A product of love? Impossible. Not with how everything unraveled from there.

A half-breed? The term alone makes my blood boil.

I'm still the same underneath it all. I know that deep down somewhere, but here, at this moment, with my mind tormenting my every breath, I don't feel the same.

I need to rid myself of these thoughts.

Clenching my eyes closed, I try to ground myself in the room, but nothing is sticking. The countdown to lunchtime looms, promising me a moment to breathe among the madness, but it feels as though time is standing still.

I don't know who I am. I don't know if the cloak draped over my shoulders is the right color.

Gray.

Green.

Gray and green?

I don't know anything.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I've never truly felt like I belonged anywhere other than with my family, but now it's even worse. I don't know how to make it all better.

A hand clamps down on my thigh, startling me from my intrusive thoughts, and my head whips up to find Kryll offering me a soft smile, but I don't miss the way his eyebrows are furrowed together.

"Are you doing okay, Princess?" his voice is raspy as he whispers.

I try to gulp down the rising stress, but all I can do is shake my head. His grip on my thigh tightens, bringing me a little closer to the present, and I manage to take a deep breath, followed by another.

My lips part in an attempt to express what's going on in my mind, but my thoughts are cut off by the shrill bell that rings through the air.

I slump back in my seat, gasping with each rise and fall of my shoulders.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

I can't seem to get my tongue to work enough to ask it out loud as Kryll rises to his feet. He offers me his hand, his swirling tattoos luring me in, and I'm acutely aware of Brody's presence beside me.

A flash of red in front of me confirms Raiden's close too and it's enough to push me over the brink I've been so desperately clinging to. But in the blink of an eye, a whoosh of green swipes across my vision.

Nausea radiates from my stomach, an all-too-familiar feeling at this point, and a moment later, the world is spinning around me as I stand on wobbly legs.

Blinking, it takes a few tries to get my gaze to settle on the tense jawline of an angry wolf.

Cassian.

"Let's talk, Alpha."