CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

A short while later, Antoni stood in the kitchen, staring at a note from his mother. Matty's arm pressed against his as they read the letter and Antoni tried to ignore the tingle in his body at having Matty so close.

Enjoy the Champagne and chocolates! Love, Mom

p.s. Champagne is in the refrigerator and check the cupboard to the left of it for the chocolates.

"I feel like this is going to turn into a scavenger hunt," Antoni said, chuckling. "She really did a lot of planning for this wedding. I was just gonna show up at city hall and call it good."

"It's nice," Matty said in a thoughtful tone. "They care a lot about you."

"They do," Antoni agreed. He shifted to look Matty in the eye. "I'm sorry your parents couldn't be here."

"Nah, it's okay. They're not people who enjoy travel. I don't take it personally. I see them in the summer when I go home but they're pretty content where they are and that's okay."

A funny little jolt went through Antoni as he wondered if that meant he and the kids would travel with Matty to visit them next year.

"Well, you're gonna see a lot of my family," Antoni said with a laugh to cover the awkwardness. "Probably even more than you already have. Hope it's not too much."

"No. They're great." Matty's tone was warm and affectionate as he reached for the refrigerator door handle and pulled out the bottle of Champagne. "I like them a lot."

"That's good. They like you too," Antoni said, opening the cupboard that held fancy glasses neither of them had touched since Antoni moved in.

Matty said. "Hey, do you want anything besides Champagne and chocolate or …?"

"Nah. I'm still full from dinner. You can grab anything you want though."

Matty shut the refrigerator door. "I'm good. This will be fine."

After they carried everything downstairs. Antoni watched Matty uncork the Champagne and pour it, trying to ignore the way those big hands made the bottle look comically small.

And the way the sight made heat pool in his belly.

"So, what are we drinking to?" Antoni asked, holding out his glass.

"Protecting Eli."

"Perfect." Smiling, Antoni gently clicked glasses with Matty and took a sip, enjoying the tickle of bubbles flowing across his tongue.

"And to us," Matty said, his gaze locked on Antoni's.

Antoni swallowed hard, surprised by the sudden shift in mood. "Yeah," he whispered. "To us."

They enjoyed a few sips of the Champagne before Matty cued up the next episode oftheir favorite show.

They were a few minutes into it when Matty lifted his arm to drape along the back of the couch behind Antoni and said, "Hey, so I was thinking maybe we should get used to um, being close. To make this look legit and all. "

Antoni raised an eyebrow. "You just want an excuse to cuddle."

Matty grinned. "Busted."

Laughing, Antoni slid a little closer, letting his hip and thigh press against Matty's. "Yeah, we can cuddle."

Was he really complaining about a chance to get close to the gorgeous, sweet man he"d married? No, he definitely was not.

Matty wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer.

Antoni tilted his head and rested it against Matty's shoulder. For a while, they watched in silence, taking sips of the bubbly wine and enjoying the drama on the screen.

"Damn it, I can't reach the chocolate," Matty grumbled.

Antoni lifted his head. "It's right there!" He looked pointedly at where it rested on the coffee table in front of Matty.

"Yeah, but my hands are full." Matty grinned, holding up his glass and squeezing Antoni's shoulder simultaneously.

Antoni hid a smile, endeared by Matty's playfulness. "Oh, fine. I'll grab it."

He reached forward and snagged the box of artisan chocolates off the table with his free hand, then set the box on Matty's thigh before getting situated. Matty pulled him close again.

"Now what?" Antoni asked.

"Guess you'll have to feed me," Matty teased.

"Only been married for a few hours and he's already getting demanding," Antoni shot back but he couldn't stop smiling. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was just … Matty.

Antoni got the lid off with one hand and peered at the chocolates. "Which one do you want?"

"Surprise me."

Antoni picked one at random and lifted it to Matty's lips. He took a bite, then immediately made a face. "Blech. Bourbon." He chewed and swallowed quickly, washing it down with some Champagne.

"You don't like it, huh? That's what you get for saying ‘surprise me', you goof," Antoni pointed out, amused. He took the half Matty hadn't eaten and popped it in his mouth. Yum. "Oh well, more for me."

Matty laughed. "I'm glad someone likes it."

This time, Antoni flipped over the lid to check the guide that showed what each flavor looked like. "How about apricot brandy in dark chocolate? And what the hell? Are these all boozy? Was my mom trying to get us drunk or what?"

Matty laughed. "Apparently. Apricot brandy sounds good though."

Antoni fed it to him, drawing in a sharp breath when Matty's tongue grazed the tip of his finger.

"Yum," Matty said. "I like that one. You eat the other half though."

Antoni ate it, licking his fingers clean of the softening chocolate after. Oh wow, it was good.

"So why don't you like bourbon?" he asked, picking out a peach and Champagne flavor wrapped in milk chocolate to try next. He ate half of it, nearly moaning at the taste. Holy fuck that was amazing.

"I got stupidly drunk on bourbon after I signed my first AHL contract." Matty made a face. "And got really sick after. I can't smell it without remembering and …"

"Ahh," Antoni said. "Yeah, I think we've all been there when it comes to drinking. Mine was cinnamon schnapps. Here, try this one. Peach and Champagne. You'll like it."

He offered a bite to Matty who took it carefully from his hand, his gaze never leaving Antoni's. This time, he licked Antoni's fingers more deliberately and Antoni's body warmed.

It suddenly hit Antoni the way Matty had carefully, sweetly orchestrated all of this. Finding an excuse to cuddle close and for Antoni to feed him chocolates …

His jaw dropped. "Oh my God. Matthew James Carlson, you're trying to seduce me, aren't you?"

Matty grinned. "Maybe. Is it working?"

"It might be."

But before Antoni could open his mouth to talk about it, a moan from the TV made him turn his head.

His mouth went dry at the sight of two of the main characters making out desperately against a door, buttons flying as one guy ripped the other's shirt open and bit at his neck.

There had been a buildup of heat and tension between them for weeks and the dam had finally broken. They clutched at each other, grappling as they kissed, making heat pool in Antoni's belly.

Antoni could hear the click of Matty"s throat as he swallowed. "Wow. That"s, uhh…"

"Yeah." Antoni shifted. "It"s… damn."

He took a fortifying sip of the bubbly wine, gaze still locked on the screen. "Matty, I…"

I want you, he thought but the words felt stuck. I want that for us.

Because he hadn't wanted to push or presume or any of that. But if Matty wanted him, if Matty was offering …

Matty kneaded his shoulder. "Antoni …"

In unison, they looked at each other and when their gazes met, heat sizzled between them.

Antoni licked his lips. "This … sex … it's the one thing we didn't talk about," he said softly. "About what the expectations were. We agreed to share a bed but I didn't want to assume anything."

"I didn't either," Matty admitted. He brushed his thumb against Antoni's neck, sending a tingle through his body. "I didn't want to assume you wanted me. Or the complications that came with sex. But I kinda hoped, you know?"

"Of course I want you." Antoni shook his head in disbelief. "You're incredible. I didn't know if you wanted me. I didn't want you to feel like you had to, just because you were nice enough to agree to this marriage for the kids."

God, they were bad at talking about shit like this. They needed to get better.

Antoni shifted, setting his glass on the coffee table, along with the one he plucked from Matty's hand and the box of chocolates.

He turned to face Matty, giving him his full attention. "So you want this? Sex as part of the marriage, even though we're not … we're not in love in or anything."

"Yes," Matty said firmly, reaching out to take his hand. "You're kind and an amazing dad and funny and honest and handsome and … everything I could want in a fake husband."

Antoni laughed softly, leaning in as butterflies of anticipation fluttered in his stomach. "Wow. I had no idea you felt all that."

"Of course I do."

Antoni looked into Matty's eyes. "You're amazing too. What you've done for us … it blows me away. But more than that, you're just—you're such a genuinely good, kind person, Matty. And I really …" He blinked, surprised by the sudden wetness in his eyes. "I enjoy spending time with you. I—I care about you. And I was only holding back before to try to protect the kids."

He looked down, struck by the sudden sight of their clasped hands, ring circling both their fingers. They'd made promises to each other today. He should be honest with Matty about how he was feeling. "And maybe myself," he whispered. "Because …"

He couldn't finish the thought but Matty seemed to understand, because he wrapped his hand around the back of Antoni's neck, using his thumb to gently tilt Antoni's head so he could look him in the eye. "I can't promise you that nothing terrible will ever happen to me. But I can promise that I'll fight to be here with you and the kids. No matter what. You have my word on that."

Antoni nodded. "I know. And that means a lot to me. It means everything, really."

Matty squeezed his neck, a warm, gentle pressure that anchored Antoni. "So if you're ready, I am too."

"I'm ready," Antoni said firmly. But still, as he leaned in, he hesitated a moment, licking his lips and watching Matty's gaze dart to the motion.

"You seem nervous," Matty whispered.

"Little bit," Antoni admitted.

"Why? It"s just me."

Because I married you four hours ago, Antoni thought. Because I"ve known you for a month, I live with you, and my kids love you already. If I fuck this up, there"s more than my heart on the line.

But rather than say that aloud, he grabbed the front of Matty's hoodie, pulling him in a little closer.

"Because I"m overthinking," he admitted, mouth inches from Matty"s. "And I want you to kiss me and make me stop thinking at all."

Matty smiled and there was a sweet, warm light in his eyes before he dipped his head and pressed their lips together.

Antoni's lashes fluttered shut as he let the rest of his worry and stress float away. Tonight, there were no kids, no looming custody suit, no school or money worries or anything else.

There was only him and Matty.

Kissing Antoni was as good as the first time. Better, maybe, because they were alone now.

Antoni's mouth was warm and soft, eager. He sighed when Matty pressed closer, tilting his head back and parting his lips to let Matty inside.

Heat sparked in Matty's body and he made a quiet noise of pleasure.

Heavy breathing and muffled groans came from the TV and he would have laughed because he hadn't planned that part at all but then Antoni slid a hand up under Matty's shirt as he kissed him back, warm and enthusiastic, and Antoni was the only thing he could think about.

Matty nipped at Antoni's lower lip, loving the soft groan it pulled from him.

"Take this off," Antoni whispered, tugging at the hoodie, and Matty wrestled it off and tossed it on the floor behind him with a dramatic flourish.

Antoni laughed, his face relaxed and happy, and Matty loved that for him. Loved seeing Antoni look like he wasn't carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Matty dove in to kiss him again and Antoni shifted, straddling his thighs, sliding his hands across Matty's chest, over his shoulders, then winding his arms around Matty's neck to kiss him more deeply.

Matty gripped Antoni's hips as the kisses grew hotter and needier.

Eventually, Matty shifted until he lay flat, Antoni stretched out long and warm on top of him. Their bodies were pressed together from head to toe now and it felt so right that Matty groaned.

"Fuck, you feel good," Antoni whispered against his mouth, like he was feeling the same thing, his hips beginning to rock a little.

Matty hummed with agreement because he felt it too.

His head spun and sparks lit up his body as he deepened the kiss, sliding his hands into Antoni's hair. He let out a pleased little noise and tugged at Matty's T-shirt, pushing it up to his chest.

When Antoni slid his warm palms against Matty's bare skin, Matty shuddered, kissing Antoni's jaw, exploring the way the stubble felt against his lips. His cologne had been driving Matty a little crazy for weeks, something soft and fresh and clean. The scent grew stronger as he worked his way to his neck, mouthing at it.

Matty's stomach fluttered with anticipation but it was a happy feeling, unlike the nerves that had nearly overwhelmed him the last time he was with a guy.

Matty had been a little drunk during the threesome with Courtney, needing liquid courage to go through with it at the time, but he was sober now. Tonight he'd only had one beer with dinner and—shit.

He pulled back, worried. "Hey, should we be doing this? You had wine earlier and the Champagne—"

"God. You are unbearably sweet," Antoni said, propping himself up on his elbows and licking his lips. They were shiny and red from Matty's mouth and Matty shuddered at the sight.

"I just want to be sure," Matty said, searching Antoni's face for any hint that he didn't want this. "We can wait."

"Nooo." Antoni made a noise that could only be described as a whine. "Don't you dare make me wait now. At most I'm maybe a tiiiny bit tipsy from the drinks but I know what I want, Matty. I want you. I have for … God, since the second you bent over to rummage in the refrigerator for snacks to feed me."

Matty laughed, surprised. "Really?"

Antoni reached down and slid his hand under Matty's ass, squeezing it. "Mmhmm. I saw this and wanted to get my hands all over it."

"I, uh, it was slower for me, you know," Matty admitted, his ears going warm. "I had to get to know you first but …"

"Hey, that's okay. I like that about you. But you want me now, yeah?" Antoni whispered, pulling away to press his free hand to Matty's cheek.

Matty leaned into the touch. "Yeah, I do. God, so much. It's not that I want to slow down. I'm just trying to do the right thing."

"I know you are." Antoni gave him a peck on the lips. "And you're amazing for even worrying about it. But I'm going to lose my mind if I don't get my hands on you."

"I know the feeling," Matty admitted. He'd spent more time jerking off in the bathroom in the past couple of weeks than he'd done when he was a teenager, confused by the way his body and his head didn't always seem to match up.

"Then c'mon," Antoni said, tugging at Matty's tee. "Take this off for me."

When the shirt had joined the hoodie on the carpeted floor, Antoni pressed a kiss to his throat, across his collarbone, then down his chest.

When Antoni grazed his teeth across Matty's pec, he groaned.

"Yeah?" Antoni whispered.

"It's good," Matty said because he didn't have the words to say anything else. He liked the way Antoni seemed sure of himself and what he wanted. Liked the way he took his time, as if he wanted to learn every inch of Matty's body.

"Good." The tickle of Antoni's warm breath on Matty's nipple made him shiver.

He grumbled when Antoni sat up but he stopped complaining when Antoni stripped off the Fisher Cats hoodie.

Matty liked the look of his sweatshirt on Antoni, but he liked it even better when it and the T-shirt were gone and Antoni was bare from the waist up.

Still straddling Matty's hips, Antoni trailed his fingertips across Matty's shoulders, mapping out his tattoos and sliding across his muscles like he was memorizing every inch of them.

When Matty hummed at the touch, it made Antoni smile.

"You like that too, huh?" he asked.

"Yeah," Matty said with a sigh. Honestly, he was pretty sure he'd like anything Antoni did. But he really liked the way Antoni looked at him, eyes full of warm appreciation.

He trailed his hands down Matty's sides, making him shiver, and when he shifted to kneel between Matty's thighs and reached for the waistband of Matty's sweats, Matty's breathing went shallow.

"This okay?" Antoni looked up, his eyes big and dark and a little concerned now.

Matty looked—really looked at him in a way he hadn't let himself do until now—tracing each little curl of Antoni's dark hair, the shape of his face, the length of his eyelashes. He was so beautiful.

"Yeah," Matty said gruffly, touching his cheek. "Just … you're so gorgeous. I can't believe you want me."

"Can't believe … Matty, you're incredible." He leaned forward, pressing his lips to Matty's hipbone.

Matty shivered.

"You're so sexy." Antoni kissed his stomach, soft, barely there touches of his lips as he grasped Matty's hips. "Your body is incredible. Every part of it."

"Yeah?" Matty asked, swallowing thickly.

"I wouldn't change a single thing about you," Antoni whispered. "Your body, the hair on your chest, your belly, the tattoos, your smile … I want every inch of you."

Matty tangled his hand in Antoni's hair. "I'm yours."

Antoni breathed in, a short, sharp little inhale, and for a brief second Matty wondered if he'd been a little too honest.

And then Antoni was fumbling with Matty's sweats, shoving them and his underwear down to his ankles, then off onto the floor.

He licked his lips, staring blatantly at Matty's cock like he was starving for it, and Matty shivered with anticipation. But Antoni didn't immediately grab for him. Instead, he bent his head and lapped at his nipple again, toying with the other one with his fingers.

Matty's skin tingled as Antoni dragged his tongue along Matty's pec, moving his hand lower, gently stroking his belly, his sides, down over his hip …

Arching into the touch, Matty held his breath, hoping to feel Antoni's hand or mouth on his cock, but he moved lower, smoothing down his thighs. He kept using his teeth and tongue and lips to explore Matty's body and it made him moan louder. Matty loved that Antoni took his time, loved the way it made his skin heat and every inch of him feel sensitive.

Matty cried out when Antoni lapped at his hip, then blew a cool breath across it. "Antoni," he pleaded, tugging at his hair a little, and he laughed softly, pressing a kiss there, his cheek brushing Matty's cock.

Matty hissed. He was already hard and he sighed with relief when Antoni finally wrapped a hand around him.

"Let me suck you," Antoni pleaded, looking up with his big, beautiful dark eyes, and Matty almost laughed because Antoni made it sound like he'd say no. But he was so ready for it he could already feel the wetness at the tip.

"Please," Matty whispered and then Antoni's tongue was there, wet and hot, teasing, swirling along the shaft, flicking at the ridge, teasing him while he played with his balls.

Matty groaned, sliding a hand down to touch Antoni's shoulder because he wanted more contact. Antoni hummed and the vibration against the sensitive skin sent a shudder down Matty's spine.

For the longest time, Antoni touched and teased his cock and balls with his lips, tongue, and hands and Matty was panting, trembling under him, by the time Antoni swallowed him down. Matty made a strangled noise and tried not to thrust up into Antoni's throat, but Antoni gripped him harder, pulling him in deeper, taking him past the tight constriction of his throat.

Matty had to close his eyes when Antoni bobbed over him because it was so good, too good. It had been so long … And even longer since he'd felt like this.

Usually he was worried about staying hard because he was trying to have sex with someone he wasn't really, truly turned on by. Someone he barely knew.

But he knew Antoni, knew the way he looked first thing in the morning before he had his coffee or late in the evening, sleepy and soft as they watched TV. He knew Antoni was kind and thoughtful and hardworking and considerate.

Matty knew him and he wanted him and he was so hard he ached with it.

Matty cried out when Antoni took him deeper and glanced down to see Antoni looking up through his lashes. His grip tightened on Matty's hips and he worked him over, gaze never leaving Matty's, and need spiraled through him fast and hot.

He wanted to last, wanted to enjoy this feeling forever, but then Antoni did something with his tongue to the underside of Matty's dick and he couldn't hold out any longer, pleasure racing through him and pulling his release from him before he could stop it.

Matty let out a shocked noise of warning, barely getting Antoni's name out before the first shudder wracked his body. But when he tried to pull away, Antoni grasped his ass and held him in place, lips pressed to the base of his cock, gaze never leaving Matty's.

Matty came down his throat with big, heaving gasps like he'd been on the ice for a long hard shift and was desperate for oxygen.

Head spinning, overwhelmed, Matty had no words, so when Antoni pulled back—lips red and shiny now—he grasped his arms and hauled him up against his chest to kiss him.

Matty had just come but it wasn't enough. He needed more.

And while the bitter taste on Antoni's tongue wasn't Matty's favorite thing ever, he didn't care, just needed him closer, needed to touch him, needed to show him how good he'd made Matty feel.

He held Antoni close, touching his bare back and arms as they kissed deeply, desperately.

After they were both gasping and Matty's lips felt a little bruised, he pulled away, looking Antoni in the eye. His hair was a mess and his cheeks were a little flushed and he looked so happy and pleased with himself.

"You … God, Antoni," he managed weakly and Antoni laughed, rubbing his nose against Matty's for a brief moment before he pulled Matty even closer, pressing their foreheads together.

"Yeah? You liked that?" Antoni asked, his voice a little raspy, and Matty got all hot and dizzy when he thought about why.

"Of course I did," Matty said because how could he not? That was crazy.

But he didn't have the words to explain, so he shifted to pin Antoni under him then kissed all over his face, hoping that was enough to show Antoni how good he felt now.

Antoni laughed again, low and warm, then brought their lips together. Matty groaned happily because he loved this, loved the slide of Antoni's tongue on his own and the heat of his palm on his back. They made out for the longest time, Antoni shifting restlessly against Matty until he made a pained noise and pulled away.

"I … fuck! I'm … I've gotta get these sweats off or I'm going to make a mess of them," he said.

Guiltily, Matty realized Antoni was still hard and hadn't come yet. Matty sat up and pulled Antoni's sweats and underwear off, tossing them both to the floor.

For a moment, all Matty could do was stare. He'd stolen little looks in the bedroom earlier but he liked taking his time now. Antoni was leaner than Matty but strong, his abs defined. His skin was a soft olive tone from head to toe and his chest and belly were perfectly smooth.

Matty swallowed hard at the sight of his cock. It was beautiful too. Different from Matty's, because it was uncut, but Matty reached out and liked the way it felt in his hand. Soft over hard, hot and eager.

"Matty," Antoni said with a groan, tipping his head back. "Yeah …"

Matty gave a few experimental strokes, then licked his palm and wrapped it snugly around Antoni's dick.

Matty knew how to work his own cock. He certainly did it enough because he was demi but he wasn't dead. He still had the same needs as most people. It was just harder for him to feel right about doing it without a connection.

But it was so different doing this clear-headed and with someone he wanted so much. Someone he felt so comfortable with.

If Matty needed some help, Antoni would show him how to make it better and Matty loved that, loved that he could trust Antoni's reactions, trust him to be kind and sweet and never make him feel bad even if he got it wrong.

"This good?" Matty whispered, stroking harder, teasing the foreskin a little and rubbing his thumb across the shiny head.

Antoni sighed. "Yeah, God, Matty. Like that." He thrust up into Matty's grip. "Don't stop. Please don't stop."

Matty watched, fascinated by the way the head of Antoni's cock disappeared through the tunnel of his fist, slickness seeping out from the tip and helping the smooth glide.

"You want some lube?"

"No. Just keep going. Please." Antoni gripped Matty's forearm, abs tightening, his hips rising to meet every one of Matty's strokes. "Your hands are so big and strong and fuck, that feels amazing. I'm so close already."

Pleased, Matty kept going, working him a little harder, trying to learn all of the little things that made Antoni moan or bite his lip. He wanted to remember them for the next time.

When Antoni was shaking and gripping the cushions of the sofa, Matty tightened his grip and rubbed his thumb across the flared head of Antoni's cock. Antoni cried out, hand flying up to grasp Matty's arm.

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God," he babbled, fingers digging in. "Matty …"

"I've got you," Matty whispered. "You can let go whenever you're ready."

With a few more thrusts and a choked-out cry, Antoni tensed, his entire body going tight as he shot up onto his chest and abs, trembling.

Matty worked him through it, making each stroke slower and gentler, easing Antoni down from his orgasm.

When it was over, Antoni sighed and every muscle went soft as he fell back against the cushion with a contented noise. Matty let go, liking the way Antoni's cum looked as it pooled into the ridges of his abdomen.

He looked up the length of Antoni's body. His chest heaved, his lips were parted, and his eyes were closed. There was color in his cheeks and his hair was a little damp along the edges.

"Oh my God," Antoni said weakly, his eyelashes fluttering open, his lips curving up. "That was … Jesus that was the best hand job I've ever had."

He looked wrecked but so happy, smiling at Matty.

"Yeah?" Matty said, feeling pleased with himself. Antoni had so much more experience than he did. With men for sure and probably with everyone. Matty had worried a little bit that he might not be able to make him feel good or that it would be awkward when he fumbled around.

But Antoni looked sleepy and content, all of the tension melted away.

Antoni crooked a finger. "Yeah, c'mere, big guy. I want you close."

And Matty ducked his head, smiling as he stretched out, reaching for a discarded shirt. He used it to wipe Antoni's belly clean, then dried his own hand before he tossed it aside.

Sorry, Charlie, he thought guilty as the messy shirt landed on the new carpet that had gone in earlier this summer. But Charlie would understand that cuddling a beautiful man was more important than some flooring.

They shifted until Antoni lay on his side between Matty and the back of the couch, tucked into the crook of his arm.

"I'm glad it was good," Matty whispered as he pulled a throw over their bodies. "I wanted it to be good for you."

"Oh, Matty," Antoni whispered, voice all soft and sweet as he looked him in the eye. "Why wouldn't it be?"

Matty shrugged because right now he didn't feel like getting into the ways he got insecure sometimes.

Antoni snuggled closer, pressing his mouth to Matty's. "It was perfect," he said as he drew back and there was nothing in his warm, contented gaze that made Matty think it was anything but the truth. "You were perfect."

Happiness filled Matty and he draped an arm over Antoni's side, tangling their legs together. As Matty pulled Antoni close and sighed, content, he thought this was what sex should always feel like.

Thiswas what he'd been waiting for his whole life.