Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty-Four

Nevaeh

I walk through the warehouse toward the sound of my father’s voice and feel the fear and trepidation melt away. He might be the king of the castle back home, but here, I’m the queen.

When I walk into the sun, I stand beside Amity. G on her left, stands guard with his hand on her hip, and Circus stands beside them.

“Nevaeh, I’ve come to take you home,” my father snaps when he sees me.

“I am home, Daddy. I’m more at home here than I’ve ever been anywhere else before.”

He flinches but stands straighter. The look in his eyes, which I’m all too familiar with, prepares me to brace before he flings words like barbed wire at me.

“You are not of sound mind. Amity was always a bad influence on you, and now that she’s shacked up with a biker, she expects you to do the same. Well, not on my watch. I refuse to let you whore yourself out?—”

“I’m not on your watch. Not anymore. I haven’t been for a long time. You may have observed me, but only in the same way a scientist studies a bug. You thought if you did things differently with me, you could…what? Make me into the perfect daughter? You could make me into Citi?”

“Don’t you say her name,” he spits.

“Why? She was my sister. You act like you’re the only one who lost her, but I lost her too. She was mine more than she was yours. She was my twin, for goodness sake. I felt like I’d lost half my soul. You were supposed to help me. You should have held me, grieved with me, and loved me harder. But you left me, too. Where were you when I needed you?”

“I was looking for your sister,” he roars.

“I know, and I get it. But while you were out chasing ghosts, you forgot about raising the little girl you still had at home.”

“It was your fault that?—”

Havoc growls, knowing precisely what my father is about to say. But I shake my head, feeling sorry for him.

“I was a child. I was not responsible for Citi’s disappearance, and shame on you for blaming me. Should I have blamed you for sending her outside to play alone? Should I have blamed Mom, who got stuck in her soap opera and didn’t check on Citi enough? Maybe I should blame the cops. Or the justice system in general. Lord knows I’m angry enough to blame all of you. But I didn’t because the only person to blame is the man who took her.

“Miss?” one of the police officers calls out to me after silence descends.

I look toward the man and wait for him to continue.

“I’m Officer Pauly. This is Officer Jacobs. We are here because it is believed you’re being kept here against your will.” He says it evenly, but I can tell he’s figured out that not everything is what it seems.

I look back at my dad and cross my arms over my chest, letting my anger blanket the wounds his words have caused. “Really? That’s what you told them?” I shake my head, disappointed. “As you can see, officers, not only am I healthy, I’m of sound mind, if you discount how pissed I am.”

“Nevaeh,” my father snaps at my language.

“Don’t. You don’t get to parent me now, not after everything you’ve done.”

I blow out a steadying breath and draw comfort from Havoc, who rests his hand on my shoulder in a show of solidarity.

“I’m sorry you were forced to come out here, officers. Wasting police time is not something I’m okay with. That being said, I understand you checking up on me, and I thank you for it. I can assure you, though, that I’m happy here.”

“Ridiculous. You will get your things and come home, or you’ll never be welcome back again.”

I fist my hands and bite back the vicious retort I feel on the back of my tongue. I’m better than that, and I refuse to let him bait me into making me the same kind of bitter and twisted human he is.

“Your house stopped being my home a long time ago. I’m done arguing with you. I love you, Daddy, but I don’t like you very much right now. I hate that someone came and stole my sister and broke what was once a happy family apart. I hate that after all these years, you still give him the power to do it over and over again. Citi is gone, but I’m still here. One day, I hope we can find a way to live with the memories that haunt us. But right now?” I shake my head. “I can’t give you any more pieces of me just so you can discard the parts that don’t matter to you. You take me as I am, or don’t take me at all.”

He opens his mouth, but I hold my hand up and stop him. “Not today. You’re not ready, and honestly, neither am I. You need to grieve for Citi. Find a way to move forward. Nobody is asking you to forget her, but you can’t change what’s happened.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” he snaps, the look of anguish ravaging my insides until I feel torn apart. “I can’t move on, Nevaeh. How does someone move on from that? You don’t get it. She might have been your sister, but she was my baby girl,” he chokes as tears slip down his cheeks.

“I was your baby girl, too. You still had me. That’s the part I don’t understand. Citi might have been taken, but you ignored me to the point where I thought I was invisible. I get that you were hurt, but you don’t have the market cornered on grief. You lost your daughter. I lost my twin. I lost my whole damn family. And now, after years of emotional abuse, you come here and try to take my new family from me too? No. Hell no.”

“I think it’s time for you to leave.” Havoc takes over when he feels me shaking beneath his fingers.

“Who are you to tell me?” My father’s snarl is cut off, but Havoc’s quiet but firm voice remains.

“I’m the man who loves her. I’m the man who wipes her tears, who makes her laugh, supports her, and protects her. I’ll never look at those things as anything less than the gifts they are because taking care of your daughter is my privilege. I’m going to marry her one day. God willing, we’ll have babies together and maybe even grandchildren. I pray we never have to deal with what you did. I can’t even imagine your pain, but I would never leave my other children to fight the currents of sorrow while letting myself drown in it.”

“Go home, Dad. Go pray to a god you don’t even believe in anymore. Lie to your reflection and curse my existence if that’s what you need. There is no place for me there anymore anyway.”

“I think it’s time to leave, sir,” Officer Jacobs states.

“You’re making a mistake,” my father tells me, his eyes locked on mine.

“Your house is not a home. It’s a shrine. Until you can see the difference, I think you should stay away,” Amity tells my dad gently, making him wince. He takes a final look at me before storming off.

The two officers, who look a little uncomfortable, offer their apologies.

“I’m sure he told you a really good story. He’s a pastor. If there is one thing he’s good at, it’s telling tales that draw you in and make you believe.” I sigh.

“We’ll follow him to make sure he leaves anyway. I’d rather we keep the peace than have to deal with any issues,” Officer Pauly says.

“We won’t be opening the gate for him, so there will be no issues on our end. The only time we’ll call you is if he turns up and refuses to leave,” Havoc warns them.

The other cop looks from me to Havoc, his eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“This is not one of those times where I’m saying something to distract you from the truth. I’m not hurt, battered, or bruised. I’m not a sex slave or a drug addict or whatever the heck else you might be thinking. And honestly, I’m starting to feel a little offended that you’re judging these people—people you don’t know—because of the cuts they’re wearing. Imagine if I did the same thing to police officers, because lord knows there are enough corrupt ones around.”

His partner says something to him. His words are urgent but too damn quiet for me to hear. “Thank you for your time,” he says before they both turn and leave.

I relax against Havoc, feeling as if my strings have been cut.

“I’m so proud of you,” Amity says, rushing over to hug me.

I feel emotionally wrung out, but there is something to be said about the sense of empowerment when you find the courage to stand up for yourself. It doesn’t undo the pain his words caused, but they would have hurt regardless. You can’t stand in front of a man who sharpens his words like knives and not expect to get cut. Standing up for myself was a way to limit the damage and help me heal faster.

“It was time. It doesn’t make it feel any less crappy, but I couldn’t hide from him forever. I think I have Havoc to thank for that.”

I look at him over my shoulder.

“What did I do?”

“Made me realize that if I’m strong enough to stand up to you, then I’m strong enough to stand up to him.”

“Parents always feel larger than life because we spent our childhoods looking up to them both physically and emotionally.”

“Plus, they’re supposed to be our heroes, when truth be told, parents are often the ones that fuck us up the most,” G adds, reaching over to ruffle my hair the way an annoying big brother would. I growl at him, making him grin, but secretly, I love it. I don’t think I truly realized how lonely I was until I found myself here, surrounded by people who don’t know the meaning of personal space . They love fast and hard, and with everything they have. And the best part, they never let go.

I retreat to our room to lick my wounds and lose myself in a book.

I must doze off because the sound of my stomach rumbling jolts me awake.

Standing up, I feel a blanket slip from my shoulders. I frown and look around, knowing I didn’t cover myself up. Spotting a note, I pick it up and scan it.

Pippin,

I checked your pulse because I couldn’t tell if you were in a deep sleep or a coma.The good news is you’re still alive ; the bad news is you missed out on my awesome company.

If you have not risen from your grave by the morning, I shall attempt to reanimate you with coffee and pastries. Oh and take a shower and brush your teeth. You stink.

“I really need new friends.”

I head to the bathroom, take care of business, wash my hands and brush my teeth before staring in the mirror.

When I came upstairs, I wanted comfort, so I changed out of my clothes for a onesie with little pumpkins all over it. I know I should change. No self-respecting old lady would walk around the clubhouse in a onesie, but I just can’t be bothered. I think the confrontation with my father has taken more out of me than I realized.

Shrugging, I tug the hood up for the full effect and own it. It’s not like Havoc is going to break up with me because of my love for all things fall. It’s not like it’s covered in dinosaurs. That one is still in the closet.

I head toward the stairs. Now that I’m out of the soundproof room, the noise from downstairs is slowly filtering up to me. The soft sound of Fleetwood Mac drifts from the jukebox, along with animated talking and laughter.

I make my way through the crowd to the bar. Most people ignore me until Toot turns and catches sight of me. His eyes rove over my body before they light with laughter.

“Well, hello, pumpkin.”

I groan. “No more nicknames. I have so many I can hardly keep track. Have you seen Havoc?”

He points to one of the sofas on the far side of the room. I can see Havoc leaning back with one ankle hooked over his knee as he sips his beer and listens to something Midas says to him. I move toward him, but Toot steps in front of me. I think he’s going to stop me for a minute until I realize he’s clearing the way for me. One of the many drawbacks of being short is that getting smushed in a crowd is far too easy.

Gripping the back of Toot’s T-shirt, I let him lead me across the room before letting go and moving around him. Havoc’s eyes land on mine right away before they fall on my onesie.

“Can I just say, your outfit is adorable?” Toot teases me. Midas grins, checking me out.

I roll my eyes as I move toward Havoc. “What are the other girls wearing, Toot?”

I turn to see him frown. “I don’t know.”

“But you’ll remember me, right?” I wink.

He chuckles. “Sneaky. I like it, though you’re hardly forgettable in those little skirts you like to?—”

“Toot,” Havoc snaps.

I sigh, turning to Havoc, who has his back to the wall. I reach up to lower my zipper. I flash him my naked breasts for a few seconds before I tug the zipper back up into place.

Turning, I see Toot staring at me in shock as Midas roars with laughter. “It’s always the quiet ones.”

Neither of them could see anything, but I guess they both knew what I was doing.

“Easy access and I don’t see Havoc complaining.”

“Lucky son of a bitch,” Toot curses before turning around and storming off.

Grinning, I climb onto Havoc’s lap, sucking in a sharp breath when I feel how hard he is beneath me.

“Behave,” he whispers in my ear when I start to wiggle. “I’m two seconds away from bending you over the back of this sofa and showing my men exactly what’s underneath this onesie.”

I take a few moments to regulate my breathing. His words sure as heck don’t help with that at all. Eventually, I lift my head, my eyes colliding with his.

“I’m hungry. I came down for food.”

“And almost caused a riot.” Midas laughs.

“I think it would take more than a pair of boobs to cause a riot in this place.”

“Clearly, you’ve underestimated your tits,” he grins.

“I will kill you, Midas,” Havoc warns him.

Before Midas can answer back, Havoc’s cell phone rings. He grabs it from the pocket inside his cut. No name comes up on the screen, just a number, but I feel Havoc tense.

“I’ve gotta take this.”

He eases me off his lap, leaving me with Midas.

“So, pumpkins?”

“You gotta problem with that?”

“No, ma’am” he tells me with a grin.

“That’s what I thought.”