9. Can I Kiss You?

9

CAN I KISS YOU?

THIS TOWN, NIALL HORAN

Alex

I’m waiting on the wrap-around front porch of Livie’s old Southern style house with white siding and a deep green door. The temperature tonight is perfect, so even though I’ve been waiting for a few minutes, it’s not uncomfortable. Whatever we decide to do tonight, I hope it’s outside.

Last night I picked her up after work and we served hot cocoa at the park at a Christmas caroling event. We served it to all the kids and adults singing, as well as the patrons who went by. It was a lovely night and I had a lot of fun. She’s so dang funny; I found myself laughing more than I have in years.

This morning, the Baker Gazette had a picture of us smiling on the front page with the heading “Grumpy and Sunshine: Are Alex Haddock’s party days over?” And there was a whole article about Livie and me; the details speculating how this might be exactly what I need to straighten out my life. I’m sure hanging out with Livie and showing up to public events with her has helped, but I don’t want her life to be completely disrupted by the media, so I’m trying to balance out the overly public outings.

When Livie opens the door, soft light illuminates everything about her and her beautiful eyes. Her hair cascades in loose waves, catching the light perfectly, and her smile is infectious. She’s wearing jeans and an olive sweatshirt—that color was made just for her. She looks effortlessly beautiful and my breath catches.

“Hey, ready to go?” I ask, trying to keep my voice steady before I can give myself away. Five days. I’ve known this girl for five days and my heart already races.

“Absolutely!” she replies, her eyes sparkling with excitement. I don’t even notice the basket she has until she passes by. I take it from her and after a cordial exchange of smiles, we head to the truck and I open the door for her. As I slide into the driver’s seat, I can’t help but steal glances at her as she guides me to wherever it is we’re going. The way she talks about little things with such enthusiasm draws me in deeper.

As we pull into the gravel lot beside the football field, I see the giant sign announcing an outdoor movie night. I haven’t stepped foot on this field in forever, and my hands tighten around the steering wheel while my jaw snaps shut.

“Hey,” Livie whispers, placing her hand over mine. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think about the location when I was planning this. We can just leave.”

I know it’s just a place, but it brings so many memories and I just wasn’t ready.

“It’s okay. I’ll be fine. It just took me by surprise.” I find an empty spot near the entrance and step out of the truck before she can say anything else. The atmosphere is festive, with people milling about carrying blankets and snacks. I can already hear the faint sound of Christmas music playing in the background.

I grab the basket she packed from the truck bed and open her door, helping her step out. “Are you sure?” Livie asks with question in her eyes.

“I’m sure. I do have a question for you, though.”

“What is it?”

“We’re supposed to be dating, yeah?” I ask.

She raises an eyebrow. “Yes, I thought that’s what we said.”

“Okay, do we need to draw boundaries? You know, like physical affection and stuff.” I search her eyes for regret or discomfort, but what I find is a smile. “I know we’ve spent a few days together already, but I just want to make sure.”

“Are you trying to have your way with me on this football field, Alex?” She wiggles her brows and finds a cozy spot on the grass for the blanket. After spreading it out, I sit and lean back, taking in the view. I can’t help but shake my head and smile.

“I just want to know what crosses the line. Can I hold your hand while we walk? Can I kiss you? Can I touch you? These past few days we’ve been pretty busy together, but this outing is public so I just want to make sure.”

“You can do whatever you want. If I’m uncomfortable, I’ll let you know. Does that sound like a plan?” she asks, opening the basket and getting two sodas out.

“Deal,” I reply, grabbing her hand and pulling her to me. I kiss her forehead and keep her tucked against me. She gets her phone out and snaps a picture of us. My mouth is on the top of her head and her eyes are closed, smiling softly. If I didn’t know better, I’d think we looked like a real couple. She invites me as a collaborator on her IG post, whatever that means, and with her help, I approve it so it shows in my account, too. I put my phone away and try to be in the moment. Her hair is soft under my chin. She smells like strawberries and something sweet. Like a dessert you can’t get enough of. I must be pretty damn lonely if I’m so enthralled by someone I just met, but there’s something about her.

The movie plays as we talk. We see some staring our way but other than that, nobody has bothered us and I’m thankful for it. I glance over at her. Her expression is focused, and I can’t help but sneak a few looks at her profile. “So, any plans for the next few days?” I ask, trying to keep the conversation flowing. She turns to me, a smile lighting up her face, and we dive into a discussion about all the holiday events happening around town.

“There’s a toy drive this weekend, and we could volunteer to wrap gifts at the bank,” Livie suggests enthusiastically. I can’t believe she’s this involved in everything. She’s constantly trying to make the best for everyone else. She offered to help with my public image, and she’s making her mom happy by pretending to date me. But I realize I haven’t even asked her about that.

“Has your mom said anything?”

Livie shakes her head. “She hasn’t. But knowing her, she’s waiting for me to say something. I wouldn’t sweat it.”

“Let me know if there’s anything I can do to make her believe we’re real, okay?”

“Yup. I’ll tell her I’m bringing a plus one to dinner. I’m sure that’ll get her talking.”

After I bring up her mom, we lapse into a comfortable silence, letting the movie play in the background as I wonder if she’s worried about how this will pan out in the end. We’re both focused on the movie until she mentions something about favorite Christmas food; just like that we fall into comfortable conversation. I realize how much I enjoy talking to her. It’s easy and effortless, and I find myself wanting to be around her as much as possible. It sounds crazy but she really makes everything feel brighter.