20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Gisett

Yesterday was a whole day without seeing Laura, not counting how she walked around with that annoying human male.

I hate that. But I can't do anything if that's what Laura wants.

Why doesn't she want a gargoyle? I can bring her along and fly along the city. She's going to enjoy that.

I stare at myself. No, the illusion of myself as a statue. I can't stand being in that spot, which is such a weird feeling. A lot of gargoyles would love to do that, but...

What's Laura doing?

I check my phone again. The last message we shared is the smiling face I sent after she told me not to show up at her place, which is pretty sad. But maybe it's even more pathetic to hope for a response.

But I couldn't make her want me, so...

The sun is setting, which means students are heading back to their dorm room, or just walking around, getting to places.

Is Laura going to walk by? She is going to, but is she going to even look at me?

My phone buzzes with a message from her. I hurry to check it out. She said she'd be back in half an hour, and I could wait for her in her room.

My heart skips a beat. I've been wanting that, but now that I have a word from her, I'm not sure what to think. I should be happy, but I can't feel that. Maybe today's the day she tells me that she doesn't like gargoyles, and I should go back to being a statue.

What do I do next? Sit there and wait for another female who hits deep into my heart?

I shake my head, trying to shake away the thoughts. She hasn't said anything, so I shouldn't think about that before she says a thing. I'll know very soon.

I arrive at her home soon enough, so soon that she isn't around yet. I stare at the door with an urge to get out of here. Somehow, I wanted to be here, but when I'm here, it feels like I shouldn't be.

While I'm still alone, I flex my arm. It has been a while since I've beaten up something, but that doesn't mean I'm weak. My muscles are fine, and my magic ability is still on par. Do I not look like a good mate?

Now that I think about it, what do humans look for in a mate? It can't be the same as what gargoyles look for, right?

Maybe Laura wants someone literate who knows a lot of different knowledge. Then I may not be the best, even though I'd hate to admit that.

I head to her bedroom, staring at her bed, where we spent nights together. She'll be back soon. That annoying guy maybe with her, so I should stay away from the living room.

I head to the corner, leaning onto the wall as I stare at the empty bed. The pillow and the blanket are all messed up. She must have been in a hurry when she left for lessons. or she doesn't care to fold everything up, which I understand. I don't do that myself too, but that's when I sleep on a bed, which has been a while.

There's a click at the door. Laura's chuckle comes and lures me to the outside like a perfect bait. But I know better than letting anyone else see me. She is with someone else, and that's exactly what annoys me the most. I don't even know the guy, but I hate him already.

It takes longer than it should for the door to be closed and Laura should be on her own and she's ready for the talk.

Do I go outside and tell her I'm here? Or do I wait for her to look for me, not knowing if she's alone?

There's only her scent in the room, so she should be alone, but for once... I wonder whether she wants to see me. Or is she going to regret her decision and tell me to be back the next day?

"Gisett, are you here?"

So, here goes nothing.

I get out of her room. She doesn't seem to be surprised. She gives a tight smile. "You're here already."

I grit my teeth when the other male's scent on her is strong, but I fight to keep my emotions to myself. "Yes, I figured you have something to tell me."

She blinks as if she is surprised. "I mean..."

I shrug. "It's okay. Just tell me."

She watches me for another moment. A thick silence lingers between us. I hate that, but there's nothing I can do to stop it. Maybe as well take it on the face.

I take a step back. "Just so you know, it's okay whatever you want to say. I hope I don't intimidate you."

She looks to the side, avoiding my gaze. "So... You want to cut to the chase."

"I do. If something is to happen regardless, just do it. I don't want to keep waiting and guessing."

She nods again. I want to hold her in my arms and tell her that we can solve everything together, but that's not what she wants. Or say, I should wait for her to say something before jumping to conclusions myself.

She says, "I think you are a great gargoyle."

Yeah... but I'm still not good enough for her.

She continues, "But I'm a human."

I nod. That's a fact and there's nothing we can do to change that.

She says, "I know you care about me, and we've shared plenty of intimate time."

It hurts more than getting my wings burned by magical flames from a while back. I fight to keep my head up, but it's not that easy.

She takes a step closer to me but stops before she'll be right in front of me. Maybe she's still scared of me. I think red eyes aren't a thing among humans naturally.

"Gisett... I... We can't. We can be friends, but not like this."

"Like this? Like... Dating each other, even though we've never talked about that before?"

She swallows and her cheeks grow red. "Yeah... We never mentioned that before, but for me, it feels like we're closer than friends, which..."

"Isn't what you want."

She nods. "Maybe in another world, we'd both be humans or gargoyles."

I spread my hands to the side. "But me being a gargoyle doesn't stop us from getting to know each other."

She sniffs, there are tears in her eyes and that hurts a lot. "But we can't. I've been wanting to be normal and be with others without looking like a weirdo."

"That you have to make yourself date someone else, just because?"

Her mouth opens and closes. I grit my teeth, trying to stop myself, but I can't. "And you're going to date that kid, just so your friends will think that you're cool?"

"Hey! He's not a kid. No, I mean, I'm not dating anyone, I..."

I hiss at her. "Maybe the two of you haven't talked about that, but you are thinking about that, right? Giving him a chance, somehow that's how it should work in your head."

She takes a deep breath, putting her hand between us. "I don't want to explain that. I just want you to know that... Thank you for caring about me and helping me more than once."

"Why do you care what others think?"

"You can't even be out in public with me."

Ah... I stare at my hands. Even if I can pass as someone who loves sunbathing a bit too much, I can't hide my wings, so she's not wrong. "So... you want a mate who you can show around."

She shakes her head. "I... I don't know how to explain it. It's just... We aren't even the same species."

I don't believe that's the main reason, but if she insists that's the reason we can't even give that a try... I sigh. "I see. It's okay. I understand. Just so you know, I hope you'll be happy."

She takes my hand, gently squeezing it. "Thank you."

I try to smile so that I won't look as scary. "A last hug?"

She nods and hugs me. "I'm sorry."

I wrap my arms and wings around her. This hurts, but... if she doesn't want me, why make both of us miserable?

Her soft body leans against me. I want to keep holding her, but...

I let go of her before the storm in my stomach rages through. I still don't understand when I'm stronger than any man she can find. But I suppose humans have a different standard than gargoyles.

I give her a last pat on the head before I leave. If I talk, my voice may crack, and I hate that.

She... will be happier without me, and that sucks.