10. Caroline

CHAPTER 10

CAROLINE

Tammy and Baxter’s wedding is just over a month away, and I’m feeling like a whale already. I have no idea what I’m going to wear to the event… or if I even want to go.

Of course you want to go!

But Rachel will be there, and I don’t want things to be awkward. I’m already starting to waddle, and the thought of trying to dress up nice for a wedding with this big belly…

You were bigger than this when you and Casey got married.

Ugh, I so don’t need a lecture from my brain right now.

I’m hot and tired and flustered.

The boys have been dynamite today. Thankfully, Troy is napping right now and Billy is quietly playing downstairs. When Troy first went down for his nap, Billy decided that playing drums on the pots would be a great idea, but I put a quick stop to that. Thank everything he didn’t wake his little brother and I’ve had a small reprieve this afternoon. I even let Billy watch TV, but he only lasted about thirty minutes before getting bored, so I should really go down and check on him.

I have my fingers crossed that he’s building a racetrack or fire station with his blocks.

“Please let that be true,” I whisper, tears suddenly burning my eyes.

I have no idea what’s got me so emotional today, but I seem to be tearing up at the drop of a hat.

Because you want to go to Casey’s game and you can’t.

I’ll be lucky if the boys will give me a chance to watch it on TV. The house is always chaos around dinner/bath time, and there’s no way I’ll get to keep an eye on the game. I’m gutted. Casey’s been having the best season, and his team made it all the way through to the second round of the Stanley Cup playoffs. They’re losing the series three to one, so there’s a chance this is his last game of the season, and I desperately want to go and support him, but my parents are out of town and Jolie, who was all lined up to babysit, bailed this morning. It was a work emergency, so I couldn’t be mad at her, but still…

Totally bummed out.

I would ask the neighbor, but Mrs. Mattley is getting on now, and I only ever ask her to babysit once the boys are already settled for the night.

There’s no way I’ll make the game, and I just have to get over my disappointment and be okay with it. I’ll leave the TV on so that anytime I walk through the living room, I can catch a glimpse of the action. I might even see if Billy can play “Spot Daddy” for a minute.

My phone starts ringing and I slip it out of my pocket, a smile tugging at my lips when I see who’s calling.

“Hey, Lani.”

“Ugh, you’re not going to believe it!”

I pick Billy’s dirty sweater off the floor and dump it into the hamper. “Asher thwarted your proposal plan again, huh?”

“How does he keep doing this to me? I had it all lined up. I’d arrange for him to pick me up from school, and he was going to walk into my classroom and the students were going to throw balloons in the air while I got down on one knee. They were primed and pumped and?—”

“What happened?”

“He just waited for me in his car and refused to come in even when I lied and told him I needed help carrying stuff!”

I can’t help a soft giggle. “He seriously didn’t offer to help you? That’s so unlike him.”

“I know!” Lani huffs. “He told me one of my students could help me, which means he knows I was planning on popping the question.”

“Uh-huh.” I nod, padding down the hallway to check on Billy.

“It’s just payback for last month when he tried to propose and I made sure I ‘got lost’ and couldn’t find the restaurant.”

“You two are unbelievable.” I shake my head. “You’ve turned this into a huge competition and taken all the romance out of it.”

“I can’t let him win, Caroline.” She sounds incredulous.

I roll my eyes and push open the playroom door, my eyebrows dipping when I notice that Billy’s not in here anymore.

Oh shit.

With a jerk, I spin, Lani’s complaints turning to white noise as I realize I just made a rookie mistake in the parenting department. Things are too quiet! I left it too long to check on him, and now Billy will be up to some kind of mischief in the house and I’ll?—

I race down the stairs, veering into the kitchen and screeching to a stop in the doorway. My heart plummets into my bare feet as I take in the mess.

“Billy,” I whine, unable to help myself.

“Hi, Mommy. I’m baking!” He throws his hands in the air, releasing a cloud of flour. It wafts through the air before landing on all the surfaces, which are already coated in a layer of white dust. Even Fezzik’s a little snow dog right now, his fur caked in white paste.

“Did you wash the dog, then flour him?”

“Uh-huh!” He smiles brightly. “He kept shaking, and the flour came off. Water helps it stick better.”

I frown at him, willing my voice to stay calm as I grit out, “You know you’re not supposed to bake without Mommy.”

His big blue eyes go a little larger, and he gives me this adorably coy smile. “Wanted it to be a surpwise.”

“Oh, it’s a surprise.”

“What’s going on?” Lani’s voice finally registers in my ear.

I let out a sharp breath. “Billy decided that baking would be a great idea, and my kitchen is now covered in flour and…” I creep around the counter and wince, noting the powdered sugar that’s been dropped all over the floor, and Billy’s pants and… “Oh crap.”

“Oh crap!” Billy yells, punching his little fists in the air.

“Billy!” I growl. “You know that’s a bad word.”

“Sorry, Mommy.”

“You got into the food coloring? How did you even reach it?”

“I climbed.” His expression is so sweet, his explanation so simple, and all I can feel is a cold shudder as I picture Billy climbing up the pantry shelves to the very top and then tumbling onto the floor and hurting himself.

Closing my eyes, I suck in a breath, fighting for calm, but I’m a trembling mess when my eyes pop back open and I stare at the bright red and blue droplets dripping off the bench, landing on my beautiful white drawers and handles, dripping down my cupboards like neon tears.

I can’t help sniffing, tears building quickly as I contemplate the epic cleanup.

“How can one kid create so much mess in such a short period of time?”

“I’m sorry, sweetie.” Lani’s voice is soft with sympathy, but I’m sure she’s also fighting laughter. “I wish I lived closer so I could come and help you.”

“Me too,” I murmur, feeling so alone right now that I want to curl into a ball and cry.

But there’s no time for that, because Troy’s cries come through the baby monitor perched on the kitchen counter.

“Troy’s awake!” Billy gasps with excitement, jumping down off his stool and running for the stairs. Fezzik barks and goes to chase him.

“Wait!” I quickly stop them both, grabbing the back of Billy’s shirt and sticking out my foot to avert Fezzik. He rears for the doggy door as I give him a sharp “Fezzik, outside! Now!” Dragging Billy back toward me, I quickly warn him, “Don’t you walk your messy self through this house. You need to get in the shower, right now.”

“But I wanna see Troy!” He stamps his foot, flour puffing up from the floor as his bottom lip pulls into a pout.

Troy cries a little louder, and then the doorbell rings.

Are you fucking kidding me?

I glance toward the entryway at the same time Billy does, and before I can snatch him, he takes off running to the front door.

“Lani, I gotta go,” I rush out, hanging up on my best friend, then bolting after my little wild child and reaching the door just as he pulls it open to reveal the last person I thought would be visiting us.