15. Cameron

15

cameron

I pulled out my phone as soon as Joel went to shower and Luke left to run home and get cleaned up. Joel wasn’t going to be happy when he realized what I hadn’t shared this morning. I didn’t want to burden him with anything else, not when he was trying to mediate things between the three of us. I’d tell him later, once it was all settled and Luke wasn’t one more development away from exploding.

I waited till I heard the water running to hit play on the video I’d been sent. It wasn’t a text this time, but a DM through one of my social media accounts. The account that had sent it to me was a fake, but the video sure as fuck wasn’t. I remembered that night. Of course I did. It was the night River had met Cooper. My roommate, Riley, and I had gone home with this sexy bear of a man and had a good fucking time. I’d actually gone on a couple dates with him after that, but we hadn’t had much chemistry outside the bedroom, and it had never gone anywhere. We were still friendly when he showed up at the bar, but it never went further than a casual friendship.

But here he was in his full glory, fucking me while I sucked Riley off. Except Riley’s face was blurred. I felt sick. Had he been the one recording? I kind of figured it had been Sammy, but Sammy hadn’t been there that night. I guessed it could have been Justin, the third guy in the video, but I just didn’t think so. I still saw him fairly regularly and had never gotten a bad vibe from him. Besides, in a million years, couldn’t imagine why he would be doing this. Or how he would have gotten the other videos. Which left Riley, I just didn’t understand why. I didn’t leave things on good terms with Riley, but he never once gave an indication of wanting more than an occasional hookup, and shortly after this night, he had gotten a boyfriend he was monogamous with. So why would Riley be recording me or sending the videos now?

I had to do . . . something. But what? There probably was a list of things I needed to do to handle this situation, but I couldn’t think of a single one. All I could do was watch the video over and over again like that would solve a fucking thing.

I should probably call Justin. I still had his number even though I haven’t used it in two years. He needed to know. The thought of having to explain this to anyone made me want to vomit. How had I gotten into this situation? I liked to have my fun, but I was always careful. I would never let someone record me like this. I felt dirty, and violated, and gross. Especially if it turned out it was somebody I thought I could trust.

I wished there were context to this. A demand, a threat, blackmail. At this point, I didn’t give a fuck what it was. It would at least give me an idea why this was happening.

The shower shut off and I quickly exited out of my DMs. I’d deal with all this later. Logan was already working on trying to find out who it was. There was no point in worrying Joel more. Later, after work, I’d call Justin, give him a heads-up, and everything would be golden. Perfect plan.

Luke met us at the theater. I’d thought at first he was gonna bail when he’d texted Joel that he’d just meet us there rather than coming back to his house, but he showed up with enough time for me to give him a quick tour and introduce him to some of the cast and crew that I actually liked.

Some of them had questions about our dynamic that I had no intentions of answering, even if I’d had a clue myself.

“Wow, this place is amazing, Cameron. Did you know I grew up here and had never been to a Broadway show until the first one you worked on a few years back?”

I clutched my chest in shock, even if I was totally honored. I hadn’t realized that. “What? That’s blasphemy! Why?”

Luke shrugged. “Never really had an interest, I guess.”

Yet he’d made sure he’d always seen every show I’d worked on with River at least once. Not even my parents had done that. It wasn’t like I was an actor or anything, but Luke and River had always come.

I was feeling emotional all a sudden and had to look away from Luke. Did he realize what he was doing to me? Long before there was even a thought of a relationship, or a pseudo one, with me, Luke had shown more interest in me than my own family ever had. Don’t get me wrong, they loved me—I knew that—but I was so different than them. My parents were both scientists, and my sisters were a doctor and a professor in biochemical engineering respectively. They couldn’t draw a stick figure if they tried. As much of an effort as they made, I was always the outsider, and then I’d moved across the country, so they didn’t have to try so hard anymore.

But Luke. Luke tried. Even thinking of me as nothing more than his kid’s best friend, he’d shown up. He didn’t know anything about musicals or makeup, but he’d still been there. He’d let me take over his living room more times than I could count back in college so I could store my canvases or have a place to paint when I’d still been living in a dorm or a one-room apartment. Whenever he’d visited and taken River out to lunch and then grocery shopping, he’d taken me too.

It was like a fucking epiphany. Long before Joel. Long before I’d ever registered having more than a tiny crush on him, Luke had been there. He might have been thinking of it as a surrogate father role at the time, and honestly, I probably was too, but it didn’t matter. He’d still cared. He’d never blinked an eye when I’d shown up for winter break, or even summer break if I hadn’t felt like flying all the way back to Washington. He’d always made me feel important and like I mattered.

“Cameron,” Luke called worried. “Are you okay?”

All I could do was nod. I was afraid if I looked at him, I’d suddenly explode all my feelings at him. Gods. I needed to get it together.

“I-I’m fine. I just realized it’s getting late and I need to get back before the actors show up.”

I didn’t need to look at Luke to know he was frowning. “Okay . . . if you’re sure that’s all it is?”

“Yup!” I forced cheerfully and booked it toward where Joel was waiting by my station. I needed to speak to him about this awakening I’d just had. Like, sure, I’d realized Luke was hot long ago, and my baby crush had come back recently and was slowly growing into a full, bone fide obsession. Him watching Joel fuck me had been superhot, and I definitely wanted it to happen again, but I hadn’t thought too much past that. Now all I could think was that Luke belonged with us. With both of us. Full stop.

Luckily, I didn’t have much time to contemplate my new existence because the actors started to trickle in, and then I was busy.

Joel and Luke stayed the whole time. They stood off to the side and talked to each other mostly. I snuck glances whenever I could, and they were fucking adorable together. Their heads were bent in close to each other, almost touching, and their fingers kept brushing. Every time one of them smiled, I just melted. I loved seeing them together.

I was doing a touch-up on Veronica, the lead female, when I heard my phone start to go off. “Can one of you get that please?” I called.

“Oh, it’s River,” Luke told me. That was strange. He knew I was working. I didn’t have a chance to think too much about it before Luke answered.

“Hey, Riv.” Luke chuckled, probably at River’s shock from his dad answering my phone.

“Cameron invited Joel and me to the theatre. He’s with someone right now. What’s up?”

I smiled to myself. I was sure River had so many fucking questions. I would be getting another call later.

There was a lot of silence that somehow felt heavy. I finished up with Veronica, and she ran back off. Luke’s whole body had gone tense.

“What’s going on, Riv?” Fuck, what had happened?

I hurried over, my hand already out to take the phone. “He’s right here, hang on.”

I practically ripped it out of poor Luke’s hand, but I could tell whatever River had called about would be serious.

“Riv?”

“Fuck, Cam, thank gods. Have you been on TW at all?” That was the one social media app that didn’t have all those rules about adult content. I followed more than a few adult entertainer accounts on there. I was sure River did too, but not once in the entire time I’d known him had he ever asked me if I’d been on it. He’d certainly never fucking called me during work to ask.

My gut was already sinking. “Not in a few hours. I’ve been here. Why?”

“Look.”

My fingers were lead as I put River on speaker and opened up the app. I knew whatever I was about to see was going to be bad.

The first thing I saw was I had 354 notifications. What the fuck? Shaking, I opened the first one and saw I’d been tagged in a video by one of those no username accounts with no pictures.

No. No. This wasn’t happening. I clicked on it with more dread than I’d ever felt in my life. I could feel Joel and Luke’s eyes on me. They both crowded closer, so they would see whatever I was about to see.

It was a compilation. Of me. Most of the clips were in my old bedroom at the apartment, but not all of them were. I saw the clip of Justin and me that had been sent to me earlier. Then there were a few more tamer segments that were more recent. Joel and me at the club, dancing and making out, a still picture of Luke and I getting coffee that day we’d had our talk, me pinned against the wall in front of the theater by Joel.

That was when I noticed the caption. “Once a player, always A player.” Then I’d been tagged, followed by the hashtags #slut #cheater #hideyourmen.

The phone disappeared from my hands. For a second, I thought I’d dropped it, until I heard Joel’s deep voice. “River? Thank you for letting us know. Cam will call you back later.” He hung up, and I collapsed.