17. Switch

17

SWITCH

N iro pulls his truck up at my house, and I get out. I was handed a bag of belongings after the wreck. My keys included.

It's a great-looking house with cream siding and navy-blue trim. Set back in a lot of land surrounded by trees, it's isolated, yet close to the clubhouse. There are details everywhere that I'm not sure I chose.

There's a cobbled pathway to the front door that I'm not sure is going to work for Sophia's limitations when it comes to walking. The surface would be a little unsteady underfoot.

There are two large planters outside the front door that I'm a hundred percent sure my mom placed there for reasons I can't explain.

It was good to talk with her and see her so happy as she headed to her chemo session. But man, it was fucking hard lying to her.

I'm glad Sophia jumped in with the story of how I proposed, because I was drawing a blank. I thought making Mom happy would be easy. But I wasn't prepared for how deceitful it would feel, actually lying to her.

In hindsight, abandoning Sophia like that wasn't smart nor fair. But I needed some time to get my head straight again and stepping inside my house isn't going to help that.

I just want my bike out of the garage Niro assures me I keep them in.

I look at the key chain and try to decipher which key unlocks the garage. After a few failed attempts, I'm finally in.

There are four bikes in the garage.

"There's a key safe on the wall over there," Niro says. "I looked after your bikes one summer you went to Florida for a month to visit your folks. The code is your mom's birthday. I suggest changing that to Sophia's birthday."

I roll my eyes. "Fuck you."

He laughs loudly. "Do you even know when her birthday is?"

I don't. "Again. Fuck you. She's twenty-five." It doesn't answer his question, but it shows I know at least one thing about her.

"One last question. You need lessons on how to be a husband, or you remember enough of how to treat a woman?" Niro asks.

This time I laugh. I remember this is what club life is about. Hanging with your brothers. Laughing about shit. Feeling a part of something.

"I remember."

"Thank fuck because while I would totally have done it, I wasn't up to teaching you the birds and the bees all over again."

"You know I only lost the last ten years, right? I didn't get a frontal lobotomy or anything."

I enter the code. There are keys there. But there's also a Glock, bullets, and cash. Good to know. But I focus on the key fobs. With the electronic ignition, it takes a minute to figure out which fob goes with which bike.

"The three-wheeler is your dad's," Niro says. "He leaves it here to use when they come visit. Might be a safer bet for today given your arm is still fucked and you want to take Sophia out with you. I can go home and get my three-wheeler and take Avery out on mine."

I want to argue. I've been craving my own bike. But Niro is right. I need to make sure I accommodate Sophia. I want her to be comfortable, and I don't want her to worry about being able to hold on. There is a proper second seat on Dad's bike with a back rest. She can get comfortable knowing the bike is totally stable.

I sit on the bike and start the electronic ignition. Dad's bike rumbles beneath me. The sound is so utterly familiar. The throaty roar rumbles through the garage, bouncing off the concrete walls.

On autopilot, I back it out of the garage and turn it around on the drive.

"Helmet," Niro calls out, pulling one off the shelf. "And take your mom's for Sophia."

I grip the handlebars, and the vibrations rattle through my fingers.

I close my eyes and sit here.

Fuck. It's been a journey to get here.

I'm proud of how far I've come.

It's cold but sunny. There's a breeze on my face.

"You coming in your jeans right now, or do you want to take these helmets from me?" Niro asks.

I open my eyes and take the helmet. "Putting this on feels a bit like closing the gate after the horse has bolted."

"Put it this way, your brain is only lightly scrambled. Another smash and you could end up with custard. So, let's go with the helmet until we're sure you're as capable as you ever were on a bike."

I don't want to admit he's right, but I put it on.

He tucks the spare in the hard case on the back of the bike. "I'll lock up your garage and meet you back at the clubhouse in fifteen when I've got my bike. You remember the way?"

"I got it."

"Good. Drive safe."

And I set off, but as soon as I pull out of the driveway, I speed up. I want the feel of air pressure hitting my chest. I want the pummel of it against the exposed part of my face.

God, I missed this. The road stretches out in front of me, and I open the bike up further. My reflexes are quick. My grip on my left hand is a little looser than my right. Thankfully, my front brakes are on my right, and my rear brakes are controlled by my foot.

I can feel the stress get blown away. I have no idea what state my mental health was in before the incident, but I've got to believe being out on my bike will speed up my recovery.

The ride in Niro's truck was a good refresher on the directions, and it appears that I must have a fairly good sense of location as not only do I remember it, but there is a sense of familiarity to it.

When I pull into the clubhouse, I'm smiling, but that smile turns into a grin when I see Sophia standing outside the clubhouse with Catalina, who has obviously loaned Sophia a set of leathers.

"You need to get your wife some protective clothing of her own, Switch."

"Why would I when she looks so good in yours?" I jump off the bike and remove my helmet. "Hey, Sparrow."

"I'll leave you guys to it," Catalina says.

"You look hot as fuck in these," I say, running my finger down her zipped-up front. She's curvier than Catalina, so the leather hugs her tightly. She's shorter too, so the pants are rolled up near the top of her hiking boots.

"They're too small."

"Not from where I'm standing." I place my knuckle beneath her chin and kiss her softly.

"We need to talk," she says. "You dismissed me in the kitchen and then left me after the call with your mom."

"I know."

"That's not how we do things. I've just learned I don't know anything about my own family. I can't be in a relationship, even one mostly for appearances, with someone who won't tell me who they really are. I want you to talk to me. Include me."

"I know. I'm sorry. We will talk. But humor me, Sparrow. I just sat on my bike for the first time in what feels like forever. I pulled up, and you're standing here looking like a snack I want to eat in those leathers. And we're about to go for a ride with my friend. Can we just enjoy this, and then talk later? I can't do serious right now."

I tug her to me and kiss her with more feeling. Perhaps too much, given the way Clutch whistles when he sees us across the lot. I put a finger up behind Sophia's back in his general direction.

"Okay. But only because you kissed me like that. And that I have your word we can talk later because I don't like being dismissed, Theo."

I pull her lower lip down with my thumb and kiss her again. "I know, Sparrow. And I promise. We can talk all you need later."

"Sophia, I'm coming with you," a little voice cries, and then Avery barrels from around the back of the clubhouse. She's wearing a full set of little leathers and carrying a sparkly pink helmet.

Bates walks behind her. "I said don't run in the lot, Ave."

"Look what mine says. Look. Look." She spins around.

It says Property of Daddy , and beneath it, a second patch says And Uncle Colton .

"I love it," Sophia says. "You are very lucky that your daddy and Uncle Colton have your back."

"I bet Uncle Switch has yours. He had Auntie Ari and Lola's."

I glance at Bates, who shakes his head subtly. "What do you know about that, pumpkin?"

"I heard Auntie Gwen tell Mommy that Auntie Ari and Lola are alive because Uncle Switch was so brave."

Bates rolls his eyes. "Love our old ladies to death, but they're freaking gossips." He picks Avery up, and I have the spark of a memory: Vi telling him to put Avery down, and him saying he was making up for lost time. That's it. They were apart for a while.

"You only found you had a daughter this year," I say.

"Yeah. So?" Bates says. Then his eyes widen. "You just remembered that?"

"Memories are flickering like a fucking candle. Can't remember everything. But some things are coming back to me."

Bates puts Avery to the ground and pulls me into a hug. It's unexpected and really fucking hard. Bates is a rock-solid guy. "We missed you, brother. Not just you being around, but your presence. It's good for the club to have you as the voice of reason."

I hug him back because I guess this is something we do, but also, because it feels good.

The roar of a bike causes us to pull apart.

Niro arrives on a bright pink three-wheel Harley.

"What the fuck?" I say.

Bates laughs. "Got it for Avery. She said she wanted a Cinderella carriage. So, he bought a pink Harley, just for when the two of them are doing shit together."

"You trust him with your kid on his bike?"

"You only remember the old Niro." Bates smiles. "He's the best fucking friend I ever had. I'd trust him with my life."

"Permission to come aboard?" Avery yells up at him.

"Permission granted," Niro says and offers her his arm like they've done this a million times. He hoists her up behind him into the pillion seat and straps her in. "You two ready?" he asks us.

"Ready. You want to get on, Sparrow?"

She walks towards it. "I'm not sure how I'm going to get my leg over the seat."

I bend to pick her up, thinking that's the easiest way to get her on the bike. But then something strikes me. An echo from medical training maybe.

"Hey. I was just about to pick you up and put you on the bike. But it dawned on me. That may feel infantilizing to you. And maybe what you need is to figure out how to get on alone."

She touches my face. "That's really thoughtful of you. Can you help me figure out a safe way to get on by myself, and if it doesn't work, you can lift me on?"

"Of course. Let's try the other side because it'll probably be easier for you to get your right leg over the bike."

So, we figure out a way. I show her where the footrests are and where she can place her hands to take her weight. I'm inspired by her perseverance to do it on her own.

When she finally sits, Avery cheers, and I hand Sophia the helmet from the back of the bike.

I hop on in front of her. "Ready?"

"Yes," she says, excitement sparkling in her eyes, and I suddenly have the urge to fuck her on the bike.

I mean, I have the urge to fuck her, period. Took a lot to stop things last night after we got each other off in the shower. But as soon as we hit the bedroom, I could feel a headache coming on.

Yet now… I feel like I could move heaven and earth if I needed to.

"Down the shore, slow and steady?" Niro shouts and I nod.

I massage Sophia's calf, and she squeezes my shoulder. Shit, we need connected helmets so we can talk to each other.

We pull out of the lot in a mini convoy. Bates falls in behind us on his bike. I had no idea he was going to join us. When he pulls alongside Niro, Avery stretches out her arm to try and reach him, and I'm kinda envious of the family Bates has found.

Reminds me a little of how Mom and Dad were.

Family first.

Maybe I'm on that path because nothing about this is feeling fake.

Today, I get to ride with my wife.

And it doesn't get more fucking glorious than that.