Chapter 30

CHAPTER THIRTY

C yn knew she was deceiving him by not clarifying that she was a widow, yes, but also a virgin. However, right then, she cared little for that, only that he stayed with her. He made her feel warm inside. Made her feel strong and safe, when lately she felt like she was constantly scared.

"Leo," she whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I need you." She'd wanted this since their last kiss. Needed to feel his big body pressed to hers again.

The noise he made was a low growl, and then he was lowering his head to kiss her. It was slow and achingly sweet.

Today had been a revelation. A window into what true happiness and love could bring. She had her children and loved them, but to have an adult love you with no restrictions…. An all-encompassing love like the Nightingales shared awed Cyn.

"I love your scent," he whispered, his kisses moving to the neckline of her dress. Fire ignited wherever his mouth touched, and Cyn was soon wrapped in the sensual spell that Leo was weaving around her. She felt his fingers easing the hem of her dress higher. He stroked her, caressing every inch of skin he uncovered.

"Undo your buttons, Cyn."

She stepped back. Her fingers fumbled but finally managed what he asked, and then he was kissing the tops of her breasts. Heat pooled inside her. Pressure built, and she ached to have it released. He licked around her nipple as he had before. His hand reached the top of her thigh, hot strokes of his tongue driving her passion higher.

Cyn felt her dress fall to the ground, and then he was pulling her chemise over her head, and she was naked before him. He took a step back to study her.

"You are a siren," he whispered. He traced a finger down her neck. "Your skin is soft like silk." Cyn closed her eyes as he stroked down her breast and across one nipple.

She was then being lifted into Leo's arms, and he carried her to the bed, lowering her gently onto the mattress. He then shrugged out of his jacket and tugged off his boots. Lastly, he pulled off his necktie and shirt. His breeches he left on. For now, Cyn thought.

"Are you sure?" he asked her again, and she nodded when she could find no words.

There were nerves but no doubts. Cyn's need to be close to this man she had always loved was strong. But this love was a great deal different. This was raw and so real that she felt it deep inside.

He braced himself over her and then kissed her again. Stroking, touching, igniting yet more fire.

"Open your legs for me, my sweet."

She did as he asked, and then his fingers were there, stroking her in a place only she had touched before. His caresses were gentle as he found the taut bud between her thighs.

"Leo," she whispered, awed at the sensations .

His kiss was hard and possessive as he slid fingers between the damp folds below and inside her. She moaned softly, and then he was taking her nipple into his mouth, and she shattered beneath him.

"That's it, Cyn, let go for me," he whispered, continuing the sensual torment until she shuddered and then slumped onto the mattress.

"I've never… I didn't know," she whispered.

"Clearly your husband was an inept lover," Leo gritted out, climbing from the bed. He then removed his breeches, and she got her first real look at him. All the sleek hardness of his body and the jutting arousal between his thighs.

"You are beautiful," Cyn whispered.

"No, that title is for you," he said, bracing himself over her again. "Take me inside you, Cyn."

Tell him.

But she didn't, instead opening her legs again. He settled between them, their eyes meeting.

"Are you sure?" he whispered.

"I am."

He eased inside her, thrusting until he was fully seated. Cyn had tried to swallow the cry of pain and failed.

"No!" He looked down at her. "Dear God, you're a virgin."

It hurt, but the pain was nothing compared to the feeling of him deep inside. It was as if they were one.

"Damn you, you should have told me." He growled the words at her, his face inches from hers.

"How?" She moved.

"Don't move!"

She did so again, and he moaned. Easing out of her body, he slid back inside.

"Too good," he rasped. "You feel too good for me to stop."

"Then don't," she said into his neck, her arms holding him tight .

He thrust back into her slowly, again and again. Cyn felt the tension climb inside her once more, and then that wonderful rush of heat and pleasure. Above her, Leo arched and reached his own release. He rolled, landing on the bed beside her.

"You should have told me," he said long minutes later.

"They weren't easy words to say." Cyn rolled onto her side to look at him.

"I had a right to know. I could have hurt you." She heard the anger in his voice. Gone was the man who had just made love to her. The man who had shown her over the last few days what being protected felt like.

"Leo, my husband married me to be a mother for his children, but he did not want me for anything else, as he still loved his mistress," Cyn said. "How was I to tell you that humiliating piece of information?"

"You should have tried," he said, his voice hard. "I could have hurt you."

"You didn't, and I'm sorry I did not tell you I was a virgin, Leo."

"You deliberately misled me, Cyn."

She didn't know how to answer that, because she had. Cyn had never said outright she was experienced but never denied it either.

"I don't like people lying to me," he said, moving to the side of the bed, away from her.

"I lied to you because admitting the truth was humiliating," Cyn said, sitting up and wrapping the blanket around her.

He pulled on his breeches and then rose to grab his shirt.

"You are leaving because I didn't tell you?"

"No… yes," he said.

"Well, what is it?"

He spun to face her. His eyes shadowed .

"This… all of it, I don't know…." His words fell away. "We need to deal with the Baddon Boys before?—"

"We think about what is between us?" she finished for him. "And now I have angered you, which has given you a reason to leave."

"No."

"Yes. God. I am a fool," Cyn whispered.

"You are not a fool," he gritted out.

"I am, because today I let myself believe that maybe we… no, it matters not. Just go, Leo."

"You have children?—"

"Don't you dare use them to run from me again!"

Leo had broken through her resistance and slid into her heart. Him and his family, and she'd felt a kernel of hope start to grow that maybe a future could lie there for her, Simon, and Meg. But now he was putting distance between them because she'd not been truthful with him. Because he feared what lay between them.

This man had hurt her once, and he was about to do so again. But unlike last time, she would show no one her pain. If Kenneth had taught her anything, it was how to hide what she felt deep inside. Closing her eyes, she exhaled slowly. When she opened them, her expression was empty.

"Go home, Leo. I don't think there is anything further to say. Yes, I lied to you and that was wrong, but I don't believe that is the only reason you are reacting as you are. You are scared?—"

"Don't believe you know my thoughts." He glared at her.

"Well, tell me what you are thinking then," she snapped. The wonderful lethargy she'd felt after their lovemaking had gone. Now every muscle ache and pain in her body hurt along with her heart.

He began buttoning up his shirt in silence.

"You kissed me and looked after me. I-I tried to keep a distance between us, but you saved me twice, and then today helped my staff. You took me to be with your family and take part in those games. You pushed me to accept you," Cyn said coolly, when inside her heart was shattering again. But this time, she knew it would hurt more. "But now you are using my lie to put distance between us."

He opened his mouth to speak, but Cyn held up her hand. "I want you to go." She rose, taking the blanket with her. Wrapping it around her body, she then walked to the door and unlocked it. "Unlike you, I grew up, and I won't let you destroy me a second time. Please leave," she added, opening it.

"I didn't destroy you," he gritted out.

"Get out of my house and my life."

"No. That is not happening. We will work this out when you are safe."

"You have no wish to work anything out, my lord. Because I have children, and when you are with me, you feel emotion, and you don't want that in your life."

"Cyn—"

"Get out," she said slowly.

He walked by her, and she stepped back out of his reach when he stopped before her. They stared at each other, and then he left. Cyn closed the door softly behind him and turned the key in the lock once more.

Moving to the window, she watched him walk outside minutes later, now dressed in his coat and hat. He turned to look up at her window. She stepped back and went to her bed.

Lying there, Cyn gave in to the tears that wanted to fall. She let them slide down her cheeks until she was done. She would weep no more. Tomorrow she would then set about eradicating Leo from her heart a second time.