10. Alana

ONE HUNDRED YEARS AGO

TEN

We are gathered under the light of the moon. The lake glistens, her surface dancing with the caress of the pale yellow light that filters down from a starry sky.

Any other night, it would be beautiful.

Tonight, it is the ugliest moon I have ever seen.

I am standing at the back of the crowd that has gathered by the lake. Kayan appears beside me and takes my hand. He squeezes it hard, and leans down to press his forehead against mine. “I’m sorry,” he whispers.

Rosalie is at my other side now, and she too grabs my hand. “I’m sorry, too, Alana.”

I cannot answer them. Grief hangs so thick in the air I can barely breathe. Mine, my parents’, my friends’.

Gathered together on the eastern side of the lake are the fae who killed my brother. The ones who were escorting me from the village when he tried to stop them.

They have not been punished, or stripped of their ability to use weapons, or banished from our village.

There have been no consequences except having to face the destruction in my mother’s eyes when they broke the news to her.

My father stands by the moon rock, wings tucked neatly behind him. The ethereal green glow that denotes his connection to the earth is more muted than usual. He does not search for me or try to seek my gaze.

Next to him, my mother is mute and wears the expression of someone so lost in her own sadness she might never return. She doesn’t look for me either, but it is not because she hates me.

It is because she loves me, and she has lost me.

In the morning, I am to leave. Despite what happened, the villagers were unanimous; Samuel’s death only served to prove that I am a danger to the Leafborne. When was the last time one of us died prematurely? When was the last time we held a funeral for a fae of Samuel’s age?

Has there ever been a fae death so young?

With Kayan and Rosalie beside me, I try to ground myself. I try to shut out the tidal waves of pain that barrel towards me, and threaten to overwhelm me.

But it is too difficult.

Their pain merges with mine and grows bigger, stronger, more consuming. Until I can barely breathe, barely see.

I pull out of Kayan’s grasp and turn away from the lake. As the ceremony starts, and my brother’s body is pushed out to the centre of the lake by the elders with water magic, I stumble towards the treeline.

In the darkness of the forest, away from the clearing and the sight of the fire fae lighting torches that will turn Samuel’s body to ash, I sink down to my knees and bury my face in my hands.

Maura is the one who finds me. I know her presence immediately and look up from my palms to see her skinny legs and wizened hands.

She crouches in front of me and tilts her head. “You are to stay,” she mutters.

I can’t speak.

“Did you hear me? You are to stay, Alana.” She stands, not an ounce of sympathy showing in her words or her thoughts.

“Why?” I blink up at her through tear-filled eyes.

“Because your mother is a good woman, and she will not survive losing two children.” Maura extends a hand to help me to my feet. My wings flutter a little as I straighten myself. From the ground nearby, a purple butterfly floats up into the sky, then disappears behind a clutch of bushes.

“Thank you.” I wipe my cheek with the back of my hand.

Maura looks me up and down, purses her lips, then sighs. “I truly wish you had never been brought into this world,” she says. “It was foolish.” She shakes her head, then turns away from me. “Foolish fae,” she mutters as she walks away. “Foolish fae.”