CHAPTER FOURTEEN

It took a moment for Emilia to remember where she was the following morning.

There was the chirp of birdsong outside her window and a bright light all around her room. She lay silently in her bed, listening to the world waking up around her, wondering why she felt so content.

Then the conversation with Adam came back to her. Lord Bellebrook, she reminded herself with a small smile.

She was still stunned that it had taken place at all. It was astounding to her that this unassuming and kind man liked her enough not only to tell her he was captivated by her, but to offer her his hand in marriage.

She pushed back the blankets on her bed and stood, walking across the cold wooden floors to the windows. It was the same view she had admired only days before, but somehow the world looked better and brighter this morning.

I am finally free of the duke, she thought in ecstasy.

The feeling was wonderful but bittersweet. Emilia knew, that no matter how much she liked and admired Lord Bellebrook, this was a marriage of convenience. He would no longer have to be pushed toward Lady Seraphina Cheswick—a fact that gave her vicious pleasure—and she would not have to marry the Duke of Elderbridge.

She sighed, looking out into the wintry day before her and feeling festive with the joys of the season. Thinking to the night before reminded her that she needed to speak with Charlotte. It might be unwise to share what had taken place with the earl just yet, but it was not only that which she wished to speak with her friend about.

She had noticed that Charlotte and Lord Spencer had maximised their opportunities on the dance floor, hardly parting for the remainder of the evening, and had never seen Charlotte laugh so heartily. That seemed like a love match if ever she had seen one.

She thought of Adam’s kind face, his twinkling eyes, and his mischievous smile. Perhaps she could hold some hope that, given time, he might feel that way toward her. Until then, she had to go downstairs and face a household of guests who she would be lying to for the majority of the next few days—including her own parents.

She thought of Charlotte, guilt weighing heavily within her at keeping the truth from her, but she was unsure if her friend would be able to keep it to herself around Lord Spencer. If it were to get out she would have far more trouble on her hands than she needed.

A gentle knock on the door announced the arrival of her maid and she began to get ready for the day, a spring in her step and excitement in her heart for the first time in weeks.

***

Adam sat beside Lionel in a daze. He had some eggs and buttered toast on his plate, but nothing felt real.

What on earth have I done?

There was no denying that the moment Emilia had agreed to his proposal, he had felt elated. That feeling still lingered, but it was mixed with the guilt that swirled about his mind every day.

He swallowed, picking up his cup of coffee and trying to tune into the conversations around him. Lord and Lady Sternwood were discussing hanging ornaments as their Christmas activity of the day. Along the table, the Pinkertons remarked upon the excellent breakfast that had been laid out for them. Adam felt distanced from it all—the world around him waslike a dream world he had accidentally stumbled into.

So much of the last three years had been shrouded in sadness and melancholy that he felt like an entirely different person this morning. Anastasia was never far from his thoughts, but Emilia’s presence had somehow combined with hers to lighten his mood and make her memory sharper and keener—it was almost as though Emilia had made it less painful to remember her.

How strange life can be at times.

Feeling eyes upon him, he looked up into Frederick’s assessing gaze. Having been caught watching him, Frederick schooled his expression into a more neutral one, but Adam had seen the calculating assessment in his face.

What could have angered him already? It is not even ten o’clock.

With a jolt, he wondered if Frederick had dipped too deep again the night before. He had been so distracted by his own plans; he had not kept an eye on him. Adam glanced at Lord Sternwood, and sure enough, the man’s gaze returned to Frederick time and again, trying to catch his eye.

This was a familiar dance.

Frederick would always win hands of cards to start with. Successful gamblers, if one could describe them as such, knew to quit while they were ahead. Frederick had never had that ability and clearly his luck had run out. Adam recognised the signs immediately, and he was mortified on behalf of his cousin that Lord Sternwood might be out of pocket.

Adam was convinced Frederick would ask him for a loan again. He had done it before, and Adam had been fool enough to agree. But not this time. He would not be party to a repayment of a debt for his future father-in-law. The idea that he would soon be part of Lord Sternwood’s family was alarming in its way, but at least he finally knew the direction of his future.

Adam could not deny that he would have preferred a love match, but considering how far he had come in only a matter of days, he was hopeful. His heart was light and full again, and the pain he carried was lessening day by day. Perhaps he could be content with that.

Then the door of the room opened, and the object of his thoughts entered in a waft of cinnamon-laced air.

Adam stared.

Emilia looked exquisite. Her hair was up in a complicated twist at the back of her head, and small yellow flowers wereplaced within the plaits to match the gold of her dress. She looked like an angel, and it was not until she walked further into the room and Lionel nudged Adam’s elbow that he realised he was staring.

As Emilia walked to her seat, it occurred to himthat the future he had craved might still be within his reach. What was to stop them from deepening their connection?

As Emilia reached her chair, Adam’s jaw clenched as the duke stood up and pulled it out for her. Adam could instantly see the tensing of Emilia’s body in the man’s presence and wanted to leap across the table and push him out of the way.

He sipped his coffee, keeping his eye on them as discreetly as possible.

Emilia sat down, smoothing her skirts over her knees as she tried to pluck up the courage to look at Adam. Elderbridge poured her a cup of tea she had not asked for, she would much have preferred coffee this morning. He handed her several slices of toast with his fingers and placed them on her plate.

Does the man think he can dictate what I eat as well as who I marry?

She finally managed to glance at Adam, her heart leaping in her chest at the furious expression on his face as he surveyed the duke.

We are engaged to be married.

The knowledge was jarring and strange as she watched Seraphina take her seat beside Adam. His attention was diverted briefly, and Emilia tried not to stare at them as Seraphina bid him good morning. She was very unlike Emilia in looks, all sparkling diamonds and blonde hair.

But Adam said he did not want her, she reminded herself. Just as I do not want—

“And how are you this morning, Lady Emilia?” the duke asked her with his mouth full of egg. There was a drop of yolk on his chin that he had missed and it was adhering to the faint stubble that protruded from his skin.

“Very well, your Grace, and you?”

“Oh, I always sleep very well. I have an excellent constitution and all that,” he laughed heartily, and Emilia almost rolled her eyes when her father joined in with the joke.

“That is good, your Grace,” she replied weakly.

“It is. When one has so much to attend to in the day, it is unarguably improved with a good night’s rest. My bedroom at the estate looks out on the lake, which is teaming with fish. You must come to visit one of these days with your family.”

Emilia glanced at her mother, who was positively bouncing in her seat at the invitation. She felt ill at the thought and had to remind herself again that if her agreement with Lord Bellebrook came to fruition, she would never have to entertain the duke’s whims.

Lord Fairfax began speaking to her father about the arrival of his new gelding and the duke jumped on the chance to talk of the ‘prize stallions’ at his estate. Emilia listened with half an ear, conscious that she was not being particularly lively or interesting this morning.

Adam appeared to be listening to Seraphina, and Emilia glanced at him only to catch his eye. He had the same mischievous expression from the night before, and he hid a smile as Seraphina’s conversation became plainer. Apparently, the design of the teacups was exactly like the ones she had at home. It appeared she had been speaking on the topic for many minutes.

With a rush of acute joy, Emilia hid a smile behind her teacup, knowing that they were sharing in a joke that only they were privy to. It was surprising to her how comfortable she already felt in his presence, and as she finished her tea and swallowed the last of her food, even the duke’s arrogant chatter could not reduce her good mood.

As the breakfast was cleared away and the guests rose to their feet, Adam put a hand on Lionel’s arm and stopped him from leaving the room.

“I might walk around the grounds for a little time,” he said loudly.

“Oh!” Miss Fairfax exclaimed, taking the bate immediately with a smile. “Emilia, I would adore a stroll around the gardens. Might we come with you, my Lord?”

Her expression was all innocence, but Adam wasn’t fooled. “It would be an honour, Miss Fairfax.”

“Oh,” Emilia said, looking a little flustered. “Yes, that would be excellent.”

After they had donned their cloaks and gathered their gloves and hats, they met in the main entrance hall of the house.

Adam offered Emilia his arm, and a shudder of awareness ran through him as she took it. The simple gesture felt far more significant than it should, given the secret nature of their agreementand that cocoon that had seemed to envelop them the night before returned.

Adam realised he would have been content to spend all day with her just walking around the house or the gardens, enjoying her company.

They made their way outside into the thick snow. The paths had been cleared earlier that day, but their feet still crunched over the icy ground as they walked around the corner of the house.

Charlotte held Lord Spencer’s arm in easy silence as they walked behind their friends. Both had acknowledged their suspicions of what was growing between Emilia and the Earl of Bellebrook, and Charlotte was incredibly happy for Emilia.

If anyone deserved to meet a good man and be joyful, it was her. Charlotte’s thoughts turned to her own good fortune and the man walking beside her. Lionel was quiet and contemplative that morning, but when she turned to him, his eyes were alert and bright.

“It is strange, is it not, how mistletoe finds a way to survive during the coldest month of the year,” Lionel said casually as they passed beneath a towering tree with bunches of mistletoe growing haphazardly through the branches.

“Do you think so, my Lord?” Miss Fairfax asked all polite interest.

“Indeed I do. It would appear that winter is the most barren season,” he said, watching Adam in front of him, as Miss Fairfax followed his gaze, “and yet, with the right conditions and a nurturing branch to live upon, it flourishes.”

Miss Fairfax had a smile on her face now, her eyes dancing with amusement. “You are right, of course,” she said contentedly. “Much can come from barren earth after all.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Lionel replied, tightening his arm in hers and feeling the pressure return as they continued walking. After a short time, they passed a particularly large patch of lawn, and an idea occurred to him: “I say!”

Adam turned to him, releasing Emilia who stood beside him looking at Lionel expectantly. He was struck by just what a handsome couple they made.

“Do you know it’s been an age since I last crafted a snow figure?”

Adam looked down at Emilia and any reticence he might have had faded away at the excitement in her eyes.

“Oh, I haven’t made a snowman since I was a child!”

“A competition,” Miss Fairfax declared, dashing into the centre of the garden, careless for the virgin picture she had destroyed with her footprints. “Lord Spencer, you are hereby charged with crafting the base.”

Lionel laughed that infectious booming laugh of his and dutifully followed her instructions, beginning to push a small snowball around the garden as Charlotte gathered sticks and began preparing the head.

Adam turned to Emilia, who had already begun working alongside Charlotte. “It seems we are a pair once more,” she said with a lightness that drew him in, and he found himself following her without a second thought.

“So it would appear,” he replied softly, as Emilia grinned back at him and set to work on their creation.

The base began to take shape quickly, but it was not long before she struggled to push it along by herself, collapsing into fits of giggles. Adam stepped up manfully to assist her and they began to push it together but it wasn’t until his gloved hand covered hers that the chill of the cold faded away entirely and Adam became altogether too warm.

For a moment, the weight of their arrangement settled heavily between them. Emilia’s cheeks flushed prettily, her hazel-green eyes lifting to meet his. Neither moved to pull away, his hand remaining over hers, the world around them fading as his heart thundered in his chest.

But their brief seconds of connection were swiftly shattered by a well-aimed snowball. Emilia shrieked with mock defiance as Charlotte ran away excitedly, Emilia pursuing her as though they were children, throwing handfuls of snow as they both doubled over in fits of giggles. Adam was laughing himself until a snowball hit him squarely in the face from Lionel, and the fight was on.

His cousin sprinted behind a tree, but Adam was too quick for him and landed one in the small of his back before he could hide from him completely. Emilia’s genuine, high-pitched laughter was a joy to hear. She was uninhibited, flushed from the cold, and happier than he had ever seen her.

I want to make her smile like that for the rest of my life.

The thought was crystal clear, and as the game continued—the two women teaming up to pelt the men with snow—Adam’s cheeks ached with the mad joy of it all.

From the house behind them at an upper window, a face looked down on the little party with a grim expression.

Watching Adam in the garden made a bitter taste form in Frederick’s mouth. He noted how his cousin rarely looked away from Emilia, his features softening when he smiled at her. It was an expression Frederick had seldom seen from him, even when he had been with Anastasia. There was something pure and wholesome about the connection between the two of them, and he knew he would be hard-pressed to rip it apart.

He would, though. He had no choice.

Adam would lose any interest in her and return to his lonely dark house for the rest of his days, and Frederick would finally receive what was owed to him. He already owed fifteen pounds to Lord Sternwood on top of all the other bets he had made. But perhaps the man could be persuaded to forget the debt when the news of his daughter’s marriage to the duke was announced.