Chapter 12

Best Intentions

What was wrong with him? Nigel had arranged this whole promenade so that Olivia and Lord Briston might get to know each other better. He had invited Jane so that he would not be tempted to talk to Olivia, and yet… it seemed he could not help himself.

"This lemonade is fantastically mixed." Lord Briston nodded towards the glass Nigel had just poured him.

"I thought you did not care for lemonade?" Jane asked, looking quizzically at Nigel.

Nigel shook his head and tried to affect a nonchalant expression. "I am rather particular about my mix, that is all. I found that the stuff at the garden party was not quite to my taste, too sour, not enough sugar or honey to break the tartness. Though I admit, I was rather ungracious about it."

"Ungracious? It was most improper and highly embarrassing." Lord Briston shot a look at Nigel that showed just how upsetting he had found the display.

Nigel was just about to give his cousin an angry response when Olivia interjected.

"I am sure your cousin did not mean to cause offence. I imagine it is rather hard to manage his high expectations." Olivia's voice did not hold its usual note of hurt and anger, and it took him by surprise.

Even more surprising that it is Olivia who has come to my defence. Before Nigel could thank her, his cousin said, "Whether or not he meant to, it was disgusting behaviour."

"Perhaps the Duke was simply taken by surprise. I, myself, have rather a sensitive palette." Jane smiled kindly at Nigel. "And only fear of my mother would have kept me from acting as your cousin did."

"If I am honest, I thought it was rather entertaining," Olivia said.

"Well, then I shall be glad of my little display," Nigel responded without thinking. "After all, I do live to entertain."

"Perhaps you should have been a jester." Olivia brushed a stray lock of hair from her face. "I think it would have rather suited you."

Nigel laughed. "I think you would just like the opportunity to throw fruit at me."

"Perhaps." Olivia grinned wickedly. "Though you would look most excellent in that kind of hat."

"Well, perhaps you shall have to buy me one," Nigel suggested.

"Perhaps I shall. Though it would be a waste if you did not wear it." Olivia ran a finger along the rim of her glass, her eyes twinkling in the sunlight.

"Do not worry, dear lady, if you bought my cousin such a hat, I would insist that he wear it as often as possible." Lord Briston glanced between Nigel and Olivia.

"How kind you are, dear cousin, to ensure this hypothetical gift does not go to waste." Nigel raised his glass to his cousin and took a sip of the lemonade.

As he sipped the lemonade, he felt his shoulders relax. It tasted exactly as he expected. Perhaps the curse has not taken hold as fully as I fear. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught sight of Jane with a far away look in her eyes.

"You seem rather preoccupied, Miss Jane — a penny for your thoughts?" Nigel canted his head towards her.

"Oh, it is nothing. Well… actually, it is rather silly." Jane's colour deepened.

"Well, then you are in good company." Nigel only just resisted glancing at Olivia and his cousin as he said, "I have been very recently informed that I missed my calling a jester, so it is rather safe to assume that I would welcome even the silliest of thoughts."

Jane hesitated a moment and then pointed towards the cloud on the horizon. "I was just thinking how remarkably like a bunny rabbit riding a horse that cloud looked."

Nigel looked at the cloud in question. "You know, I think you may be right."

"I thought it looked a bit like an upside-down squid eating a man," Olivia said, blushing as Nigel and Jane looked at her. "Though I can also see what Jane has described."

"It just looks like a cloud to me." Lord Briston frowned. "But perhaps it is simply that the wind has moved it."

Or that you are entirely devoid of imagination. Nigel stopped himself from saying this out loud. It would do no good, and the cloud had indeed moved as they were discussing it. To him, it looked more like a camel now.

The conversation dwindled. Nigel sipped more of the lemonade and sampled some of the cheese that had been packed.

Nigel let out an appreciative groan as he bit into the Stilton. "Would you like some Jane?"

"I am not particularly enamoured with strong cheese." Jane blushed but helped herself to some of the cheddar. "It does not seem to agree with me."

"Excellent. More for me then." Nigel smiled kindly at her before adding happily, "I do love a good bit of Stilton."

"Really?" Olivia helped herself to her own wedge of cheese.

"Just because your brother has the most unsophisticated cheese pallet known to man does not mean all of us have such unrefined tastes." Nigel just stopped himself from gesturing wildly with his cheese knife and instead nodded his head towards Olivia. "I happen to care a great deal for cheese. Especially blue cheese."

"Oh goodness, tell me you are not one of those ‘the smellier the better' kind of gentleman." Olivia shook her head.

"I am indeed. Assuming, of course, you are still talking about cheeses and not casting aspersions on my character?" Nigel raised an eyebrow at Olivia.

"I would never do such a thing." Olivia winked at Jane though Nigel could tell by her theatrics she meant him to see it. "Of course, I was talking about cheese."

Nigel opened his mouth to reply and spotted the brief look of irritation on his cousin's face. It reminded him of the reason for this whole charade. There can be nothing between you and Olivia. Stop this. Though it was not as if he were trying to talk to Olivia.

She was just so easy to strike up a conversation with. And he found he quite enjoyed their back and forth. And it is not my fault my cousin seems to falter so at conversation. And I can hardly leave the two of them alone, that would be most improper.

In the distance, a clock chimed four o'clock. Nigel noticed Jane and Olivia exchange a look.

"I am afraid we must beg our leave of you," Olivia said.

"Allow us to walk you back to the entrance." Lord Briston leapt to his feet and in his haste, knocked over the lemonade.

Nigel let out a soft curse and quickly stood up, offering a hand to Olivia, who was nearest to the spilled lemonade. "My Lady."

Olivia rolled her eyes but took his hand and allowed him to help her to her feet. Then Nigel turned and helped Jane to her feet while his cousin dabbed at the cuffs of his trousers with a handkerchief.

"Did you both manage to escape unscathed?" Nigel asked. "I am sure my cousin would be happy to cover any damage it has caused."

"Do not worry, your quick thinking spared us that fate." Olivia's eyes twinkled.

"Yes, thank you, Your Grace." Jane brushed a piece of grass off her skit.

A servant appeared and began to clear away the picnic as Jane, Olivia, Nigel, and his cousin made their way back to the entrance.

"I had a lovely time," Olivia said as they drew up to her carriage. "Thank you for your invitation."

"It was my pleasure." Nigel smiled at her and then at Jane. "We shall all have to do this again."

"Indeed, we shall." Jane smiled back at him and glanced at Olivia, a question in her eyes.

"I would like that." Olivia nodded at him and then turned to Lord Briston. "It was good to see you both."

"And you, Lady Olivia." Lord Briston bowed.

As the carriage departed, Nigel felt an odd sense of loss in his chest. He turned to his cousin.

"I think that went rather well, don't you?" Nigel clapped him on the back. "Well, with the exception of you spilling the lemonade."

Lord Briston made a noncommittal noise. "You and Lady Olivia seem to have put your differences behind you."

"I thought you would be glad of that?" Nigel shrugged as they began to make their way to his London house. "After all, if we are not staring daggers at each other, you are much more likely to be able to speak to her."

"If only that were true, dear cousin." Lord Briston shook his head. "Do you not think that what you are doing is rather… unkind?"

"And what exactly am I doing?" Nigel shot his cousin a look.

"You have spent all this afternoon flirting with the young woman." Lord Briston scowled. "I could scarcely get a word in."

"It is not my fault you failed to hold her interest." Nigel shook his head. "Besides, we were not flirting. Simply… talking."

"You hardly gave me a chance. Any time I tried to talk to her, there you were." Lord Briston let out a growl of frustration.

"Well, we were all walking together. It would be rather improper if Miss Jane and I hadn't been there."

"You could have talked to Miss Jane, made more of an effort with her, and let me get to know Lady Olivia a little better," Lord Briston suggested.

"I did talk to Miss Jane. Rather frequently. I can hardly be blamed if Lady Olivia chose to join in our conversation rather than yours." Nigel waved his hand around vaguely. "Perhaps you should work on your conversational skills."

"And perhaps you should not be such a selfish twit." Lord Briston's face flashed scarlet.

"I beg your pardon?" Nigel glared at his cousin.

"You heard me."

"And how exactly am I being selfish?"

"You are leading that young woman on. You have already told me you will not entertain a future with her —"

"You know why I can't."

"Then stop this pursuit. It is not fair." Lord Briston shook his head.

Nigel sighed and ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "I am not pursuing her."

"Then what are you doing?" Lord Briston asked frowning.

"I do not know. Nothing. I am — we were just talking. There is nothing between us." Nigel shook his head. The words do not even sound convincing to me. "There can be nothing between us."

Nigel turned from his cousin and strode through the park, feeling utterly wretched. In one moment, his pleasant feelings of the afternoon had turned to guilt and anger. And more irritatingly, my cousin is right.

He shook his head in disgust. He was barely aware of his journey back to his London house. His head was full of the afternoon and his cousin's words. He was dimly aware of his hand shaking and clenched it hard into a fist.

You are doomed. You need to stop this. Nigel sighed and collapsed into a chair in his study. He glanced at a decanter near him, vaguely debating pouring himself a healthy measure of whiskey.

"Well, at least it should be easy enough to avoid Olivia after today." Nigel's heart sank as he said it. "I can just avoid a few balls — it is not as if there is anyone who will be particularly offended by my absence — and that will still give me plenty of time to find a wife."

He looked at the portrait of his father in the corner. His father's smiling image seemed to survey him with kind eyes.

Nigel shook his head. "Was it like this for you? Did you worry that you might leave mother? That you would leave me without a father? Did you even care?"

Nigel sighed and began to pace the room. Mentally, he ran through the remaining events of the season. He seemed completely unable to resist Olivia, but he was sure that if he perhaps took some time away, then he would be able to regain some semblance of composure.

Yes. This is the way it has to be. There is no future for us, and I cannot, I will not do to her what father did to mother. He glared at the portrait of his father. "I will not break her heart!"

A knock at the door made Nigel jump, and a moment later, a familiar figure appeared in the doorway. The tall, smiling figure of Alexander Rokesby stood before him.

"Rokesby!" Nigel walked towards him and embraced him, clapping him on the back. "I had not expected to see you! I thought you planned on avoiding the season."

Alexander laughed. "I had thought so too, but Rose had different ideas."

"I had not expected you to be so beholden to your wife's wishes." Nigel shook his head.

"When you are married, we shall see how well you deny your own wife. Until then, I plan on living a happy life, and that means doing as my wife asks," Alexander said.

"A prospect I am finding more unlikely by the moment." Nigel ran a hand through his hair, determined not to think of Olivia. Especially when her brother is right here.

"Then your search for a wife is not going well?" Alexander looked concerned.

Nigel shrugged. "As well as can be expected, I suppose. But let us not dwell on it. Would you like a drink?"

Alexander held up a hand in negation. "No, thank you. I fear I cannot stay long."

"Oh?" Nigel raised an eyebrow. "Why ever not?"

"I promised Arthur I would take him to Hyde Park when he wakes from his nap, and he will be grumpy if I don't." Alexander smiled fondly.

"Well, I would hate for you to anger my Godson." Nigel canted his head towards his friend. "Though I am afraid you have still not explained why you are here."

Alexander fished around in his coat pocket and with a grimace, produced an envelope. Nigel took it from him and glanced at it curiously.

"Open it." Alexander gestured to the letter opener on Nigel's desk.

He did as he was asked, and an invitation fell to the floor. Nigel picked it up, feeling his heart sink as he read the words:

The Duke and Duchess of Emberly,

Cordially invite you to the Emberly Ball.

Join us for an evening of revelry and wine on the 25th.

Nigel gaped at Alexander. "You are throwing a ball?"

"Rose insisted." Alexander looked pleadingly at Nigel. "Please, tell me you will come."

Nigel hesitated. Olivia will definitely be there, after all she is his sister. "I am not s?—"

"Please Maxton," Alexander begged. "I need you there. You are my oldest friend and much of the ton… Well, you know what they are like. Please, it would mean the world to me if you came."

Nigel sighed. "Very well. If it truly means that much to you."

"Wonderful. Thank you, Maxton!" Alexander clapped him on the shoulder and then made towards the door. "I will see you in three days!"

The door slammed behind him, and Nigel slumped into a chair. So much for my plan. Perhaps it won't be so bad. After all, it wasn't like Olivia would seek him out. There would be hundreds of people at the ball. And Nigel wasn't an animal.

I can avoid her for one night. Besides, even if he couldn't — what was the worst that could happen?