Chapter Two

“My dear Rosalind, there is something I must tell you.”

Rosalind frowned, looking up at her brother. “That sounds rather serious, Grifford. Is something the matter?”

Her brother ran one hand across his eyes and blew out a long, slow breath – something which made Rosalind’s stomach twist with worry. She set her embroidery aside completely and then looked up expectantly at him, waiting for him to speak.

“I am sorry to have to tell you this, my dear sister but I have been… foolish.”

Rosalind’s eyebrows lifted. “Foolish?”

“Yes.” Grifford swallowed hard. “Father is aware of it. I have only just finished speaking with Mama and him.”

A coldness began to rattle down Rosalind’s spine, making her shiver. “You had better tell me what it is, Grifford. I do not understand.”

Her brother nodded but then sank down into a seat opposite Rosalind, rubbing again at his eyes. A heavy breath rushed out of her as he swallowed again, then winced. “I have been gambling. Heavily.”

Rosalind looked back at him, not understanding. Surely every gentleman gambled, did they not?

“When I say that I have gambled, I should also explain that I have done so to the point of… well, idiocy. On top of which, I have imbibed a great deal and have been told that, very recently, I was found entwined in the arms of a rich widow. The gentlemen who found me will not keep silent, I know it.”

Catching her breath, Rosalind put one hand to her mouth, realizing now what it was her brother meant.

“I am sorry,” her brother groaned, rubbing one hand over his eyes. “I have been unthinking and inconsiderate and I am truly sorry for it! I have not meant to be so and yet I know that the pain I have caused the family will be great. Our father has made it very clear to me that the disgrace I have brought will have a great and heavy impact on all of us – and especially upon you, my dear sister.” He closed his eyes and then hung his head. “I apologise for that.”

Rosalind could not breathe for some time, one hand pressed to her stomach, her chest squeezing painfully. She knew exactly what it was that her brother meant, seeing now that the actions of her brother would not only besmirch his own reputation but hers also.

And this, at the start of her second Season; the Season she had hoped to find a husband.

“I will do whatever I can to help you,” her brother continued but Rosalind, having managed to snatch in a breath, shook her head fervently.

“No. There is nothing you can do and nothing you should do.” Letting her hands fall into her lap, Rosalind closed her eyes and took in a shaking breath. “To have you in my company while under the scrutiny of society would only cast the shadows you presently bear upon me as well… even more than they already do.”

“I am sorry,” Grifford moaned but Rosalind did not even hear the sorrow in his voice. Panic was beginning to rise up in her chest, her vision blurring as tears began to form, realizing just how much everything had now changed for her and for her younger sister, Emilia, who had not yet even made her come out. It was not only that her brother had ruined his own reputation, but he had also ruined theirs. Gentlemen would not want to be associated with Emilia or her because of what her brother had done, for no reputable gentleman would want the disgrace Grifford had brought upon himself to be associated with them and their family name.

“Rosalind?”

Blinking back her tears, Rosalind rose and stepped into the arms of her mother, who clearly knew all that Rosalind was feeling at the present moment. She overheard her brother apologizing yet again but his words were drowned out by her own sobs as her mother held her close.

“It will be all right, my dear, I am sure of it.”

“How can it be all right?” Rosalind asked, her tears not even beginning to subside despite her mother’s encouragements. “My brother’s reputation is ruined by his disgrace and thus, mine is also damaged severely! And what will Emilia do when it is time for her come out?” She sniffed, grasping for her handkerchief. “This Season, I will be left alone in society, with no gentleman so much as glancing at me for fear that he might be associated with me! None will wish to dance with me, none will wish even to converse with me – so what am I to do? And Emilia’s come out will be even worse for by then, our family name will be blackened though no-one might even remember as to why that was!”

“It may not be as bad as all that.” Stepping back, Lady Fairmont took in a breath and then squeezed Rosalind’s hands, her gaze firm. “I will not pretend that it is not a dire situation. Your brother has told us the truth, however, and that is a good thing for it means that we can be prepared.”

Rosalind glanced at her brother, who had now covered his face with his hands, his elbows resting on his knees.

“I am sorry for what I have done,” he muttered again, rubbing at his eyes. “I lost myself completely and –”

“Your father has already promised me that he will find someone for you to marry,” Lady Fairmont interrupted, not looking at her son but keeping her gaze fixed to Rosalind. “You are the daughter of an Earl and that means you have some standing still, despite the fact that your foolish brother has behaved so. He will do the same for Emilia, when the time comes.”

A flicker of hope rose in Rosalind’s chest but she quickly buried it away, refusing to let herself believe that anything good might come from it. “What sort of gentleman would think to marry me now that our family carries this shame, Mama?”

Lady Fairmont lifted her chin. “Any gentleman who knows you would be pleased to consider you, I am sure,” she said, with a firmness in her tone that did nothing to bolster Rosalind’s hopes. “You are quite lovely, Rosalind, with a beautiful character which so many a young lady does not possess. There is nothing about you which would turn any gentleman away.” She shook her head and sighed. “I wish that I had convinced your father to permit you to marry last Season. I understand that he wished for you to enjoy the Season and move through society without any expectation but all the same, this situation might now have been avoided had you already been wed.”

“Though I still think I was correct.”

Rosalind started in surprise at hearing her father’s low voice, though she noticed how her brother seemed to shrink back, hiding himself away from their father’s presence. The Earl of Fairmont always commanded respect merely by his presence and Rosalind could well understand why her brother appeared to be a little intimidated. She was glad he had admitted to what he had done but all the same, there came now a great sense of devastation – something she was sure her parents felt also.

“I was glad to give you your first Season to simply move around society, Rosalind,” her father continued, not so much as glancing towards his son. “I expected that this Season would be your opportunity to find the very best suited gentleman for you to wed. That is still my intention, of course, but I think we are all aware that things will be a little more difficult now.” At this, he shot a look towards his son, but Grifford was looking steadfastly at the floor, his expression pinched. “But all the same, I am just as determined as I was before to make certain of your happiness and, as your mother has said, I will do the same for Emilia when the time comes, though that is not for some years yet. This Season, your happiness is the main concern.”

Rosalind waited to see if a tiny flicker of expectant anticipation would make its way into her heart but nothing came. There was not even the smallest bit of hope, not even the merest iota of expectant relief. Instead, there was nothing but heaviness.

“Your father will do as he has promised,” her mother murmured, perhaps seeing Rosalind’s desperation. “You know that he is a man of his word.”

Rosalind nodded, her throat aching. “Might I be excused for a short while, Mama?”

Her mother smiled sadly, perhaps understanding Rosalind’s desire to be alone. “Of course, my dear.”

“Rosalind.”

She turned, just as her brother rose to his feet, one hand reaching out towards her. She did not take it.

“I am truly sorry.”

“I can see that,” she answered, her eyes brimming with unshed tears, her voice wobbling with emotion. “Though it is a little too late, Grifford. You shall be able to elevate your reputation to a commendable stature in due course of years, I am sure and will then be able to wed a beautiful young lady who will give you much joy and happiness in the years you spend together. I, on the other hand, will be left a spinster, unable to marry because of your foolishness – and I cannot imagine what will become of Emilia.” Pausing, Rosalind took in a breath for she had not intended to speak so caustically but yet, the words kept coming. “My future is dark, now. It is nothing but unfair that society should demean me when I have done nothing worthy of their censure but that is the path I must now walk, regardless. Yes, Father says that he can find me a husband and I am grateful for that, but you have robbed me of the opportunity to find a husband of my own; to enjoy courtship and betrothal.” Closing her eyes, tears damp on her cheeks now, she shook her head. “I wish that you had thought of your sisters before you had ever sat down to play cards.”

She did not wait for a response but instead, made her way from the room directly. There was a maid by the door who quickly handed Rosalind a handkerchief, perhaps having heard the goings-on and recognizing that Rosalind would be in great distress. Rather than make her way to her bedchamber, however, Rosalind hurried to the front of the house, asking for her bonnet and gloves and for the maid to accompany her. She did not want either her mother or father to see her quit the house for fear that they would pull her back and prevent her from going where she wished. Barely stopping to tie her bonnet ribbons, Rosalind hurried out of the house, her damp handkerchief in her hand. Hailing a hackney, she gave the coachman directions and then, climbing in, sat down and leaned her head back, breathing hard.

The pain in her chest was so great, she felt as though it might explode at any moment. Not knowing what would become of her from now on, Rosalind blinked furiously, pressing the handkerchief against her eyes as the hackney rumbled across the cobbled streets. Everything seemed darker now, the grey sky above her a heavy hue that had not been there before. With another sob catching in her chest, Rosalind closed her eyes tightly, trying her best to keep it contained.

“Where are we going, milady?”

Rosalind did not so much as open her eyes. “To see Lady Eleanor,” she managed to say, choosing not to reprimand the maid for asking her such a question. It was only fair that the girl might wish to know where she was being taken and, given the way Rosalind had practically dragged her out of the house as her chaperone, Rosalind reasoned it might be a little disconcerting. “I will take tea with her and then we will return.”

The maid said nothing and Rosalind drew in a long breath, in the hope that it might calm her a little. Soon, she told herself, her fingers now clasped tightly around the damp handkerchief. Soon, she would be at her dear friend’s house and then, finally, she might give way to every single bit of emotion she felt now that she was completely and utterly ruined.

***

“My dear Rosalind!”

Rosalind grasped her friend’s hands and gave in to the tears which instantly began to flow. “My dear Eleanor!”

“Whatever has happened?” Lady Eleanor, clearly sensing Rosalind’s dismay, guided her to sit down in the window seat, her eyes searching Rosalind’s face. “Whatever has distressed you so?”

Rosalind could not speak, such was her grief. Instead, she buried her face in her hands and began to weep with an openness that she had been unable to reveal to anyone as yet. Her friend said nothing but put one arm around Rosalind’s shoulders, clearly willing just to let her cry until she was finally able to reveal all.

“Whatever has happened, I will be here to support you,” Lady Eleanor murmured, as Rosalind wiped at her eyes, sniffing hard as her bedraggled handkerchief was clutched tightly in her hands. “Even if it is something truly dreadful!”

Closing her eyes, Rosalind sniffed again but finally managed to speak. “I am ruined, I think, though not by anything I have done.”

This made a frown dart across her friend’s face. “Then your brother.”

“How did you know?” Surprise stopped Rosalind’s grief for a moment as Eleanor shook her head.

“Fond as I am of your brother, he has always been something of a liability, given his clear desire to behave just as he pleases,” she said, with a slight gruffness to her tone. “I do not mean to speak ill of him but I am sure you know what I mean.”

Rosalind nodded slowly. “I suppose I do.”

“I presume I am correct?”

Again, Rosalind nodded. “Yes, you are. He has gambled foolishly, drunk too much liquor and has been caught in the company of a rich widow.” She winced as she spoke, her face flaming. “The ton will not be silent about his actions, I am sure, and therefore, the shame which he brings to his own reputation will also be brought to mine.”

Lady Eleanor let out a slow breath, shaking her head for what was now the second time. “Goodness. I am sorry to hear that.”

“I do not think I will be able to find a match,” Rosalind continued, her voice rasping now as she saw her friend’s eyes flare. “As soon as the ton hear of this, they will, no doubt, think just as ill of me as they do of him – and then what shall I do? I fear for Emilia too.”

“That is a great difficulty indeed,” Lady Eleanor murmured, gentle lines sweeping across her forehead. “The ton ought not to think so poorly of you, of course, for you have done nothing wrong but alas, such is the way of things.”

“Then you agree?” Rosalind asked, her voice breaking as fresh tears poured into her eyes. “I am quite without hope?”

Lady Eleanor turned back to face her, her eyes wide again, her hands reaching out to clasp Rosalind’s. “No, indeed not! You are not without hope. I am sure that there will be some gentleman in London who will be more than willing to look past such whispers and see you!”

This did not bring Rosalind any sort of encouragement. “I do not know where I would even find such a gentleman! And if he were willing to ignore the whispers of the ton , then I might find that the reason he is so willing is because he has his own faults hidden also – and expects me not to see them either!” Her chest grew tight, her breathing rapid as she tried to fight the sudden sense of panic which ripped through her. “I am sure that there is nothing for me, now! I shall be left alone in the world, left to be a spinster and nothing more! I shall not have the family and the home I have longed for, I shall not have the affection of a gentleman to warm my heart. Instead, there is nothing but coldness and darkness waiting for me.” So saying, she dropped her head and was almost about to break down into yet more tears, only for Lady Eleanor to stop her.

“Do not say such things! You cannot give up already!”

Rosalind shook her head. “I know that you are doing your best to be encouraging, my dear friend but there are some circumstances where the worst of things is all that one has.”

“No. Come now, you cannot give up.” Refusing to accept Rosalind’s concern, Lady Eleanor squeezed Rosalind’s hands again, tightly. “In fact, I have only just become acquainted with a gentleman who has a friend here in London. A friend who is high titled, unattached and does not appear to care much for what society might think!”

Again, a flicker of hope began to build in Rosalind’s chest but she dampened it. “Ugly? In looks or behaviour?”

“I would not say ugly, no.” Lady Eleanor tipped her head, considering. “He is not the most talkative gentleman but he was not rude when I spoke with him. It seemed to me, however, that he had no interest in being amongst society and because of that, I am sure he will think very little of any sort of gossip as well.” Her smile lifted Rosalind’s heart just a little but she looked away, quite sure that this gentleman would still have no interest in her.

“The Duke of Strathmore, I believe,” Lady Elanor continued, as Rosalind’s eyebrows shot upwards. “As I have said, he was very quiet and did not say a great deal at all, though it certainly did appear as though he were a little frustrated at times.”

“Frustrated about what?”

“I do not know.” Lady Eleanor grinned suddenly. “Mayhap you will be able to ask him.”

Rosalind wanted to refuse, wanted to tell her friend that she had no interest in speaking with a quiet, easily irritated gentleman but the quiet part of her heart reminded her that she had very little choice. “I suppose it would be wise to be introduced.”

“Excellent.” Lady Eleanor smiled suddenly, then released Rosalind’s hand. “I am sure that this will not be the end for you, my dear friend. Despite this difficulty, you may find that you are just as much in society as you ever were. It may not be as terrible as you think.”

Rosalind tried to find a little encouragement in her friend’s words, tried to imagine herself greeting this gentleman and finding a flicker of interest in his eyes but all of her attempts fell flat. Instead, she was left struggling in the dark, her throat aching, her tears shedding still as her friend handed her a new handkerchief, ready to catch them.

“I will be by your side,” Lady Eleanor whispered as Rosalind nodded, wiping at her eyes again. “I am confident that all shall turn out for the best.”