Epilogue

EPILOGUE

“ I don’t think I could have asked for finer weather for my wedding day,” Lavinia observed.

“No, you couldn’t,” Edwina beamed. “It’s as if the whole world is celebrating along with us today—as it should, frankly. This is the most special and important day I’ve had the privilege to be a part of in all my life.”

“It’s not so special as all that,” Lavinia countered, blushing.

Edwina laughed. “Even you don’t think that’s true, Lavinia. I can see how excited you are to be marrying the duke. You know, it’s a funny thing.”

“What is?”

“I just never would have thought I would see you this excited to marry! I remember when it was something you spoke about with dread—as if it was the worst thing you could imagine.”

“Well, all that changed when Seth proposed,” Lavinia smiled. “To be honest with you, I can still remember the way it felt to dread marriage. I can still imagine that if I was pressured to marry someone else, I wouldn’t like it. It’s Seth I really want, not the idea of being married.”

There was a knock at the door.

“That will be Father,” Edwina said, looking at Lavinia. “Should I let him in?”

“You may as well,” Lavinia said. Today would be the last day she would have to put up with the way her father treated her, and she knew that it was something she could tolerate for one more day. Then she would move on.

In many ways, it made her want to see her father more than she would have under other circumstances. If this was to be her last day in his household, she wanted to use it to make amends with him. She knew she’d been a struggle for him as a daughter, just as she had struggled having him as a father, and—before they went their separate ways—it would be a good thing if they could make peace with one another.

Edwina went to the door and opened it. “Father,” she said. “We’re nearly ready here.”

“The carriage is waiting to take us to the church,” their father said. “Why don’t you go on down, Edwina?”

“I want to stay with Lavinia,” Edwina said rather stubbornly.

“I need a moment to speak to her,” their father said. “Run along, now, and we’ll be with you in a moment.”

Edwina looked at Lavinia as if asking her permission.

Lavinia nodded. “I’ll be down in a moment,” she assured her sister.

“Very well,” Edwina said. “I’ll go and find Matthew.” She left the room and headed down the hall, presumably to meet them at the carriage.

Lavinia watched her go for a moment. Then she turned to face her father.

“I’m proud of you,” her father said quietly.

“You’re proud of me ?” That was difficult to believe.

“I am,” her father said. “I know how difficult this had all been for you, Lavinia. And I know that I’ve been demanding of you at times. I’ve made it harder than it needed to be sometimes. I’ve made you feel as if there was something wrong with you because you didn’t have your affairs sorted out.”

Lavinia was silent. She wasn’t going to try to talk her father out of that perception. He was right. He had done those things. She had never felt at ease around him. She’d never felt as though she had his approval, or even as though she was capable of earning it.

Even now—if he looked on her with approving eyes, that was only because Lavinia was about to do what he had longed all her life to see her do. She was about to marry. Of course he would regard that well.

Her father seemed to be waiting for a response, and after a moment, perhaps he understood that none was coming. He took a breath.

“You’ll leave this house today, Lavinia, and go off to begin a life of your own. You’ll be a duchess. A wife. Someday, a mother. You’ll be my daughter, but that will no longer be the most important thing you are. And I wanted to make sure you knew, before you go, that I do care for you. You do mean something to me.”

I mean something to him. It would almost have been better if he hadn’t said anything at all. It was as if he was trying to reassure her that she wasn’t completely meaningless, but by saying so, he had admitted that it was a possibility.

But Lavinia steeled herself against his words.

She didn’t need his approval. She had never really needed it, and now that she had found happiness with Seth, she needed it even less. Now she truly knew who she was and knew her worth, and there was no need for her father to give his opinion.

She smiled at him. He needs my approval more than I need his , she realized. He needs to feel sure that I’m not leaving this house with any resentment or dislike for him in my heart.

And she wasn’t. She would be able to look back on her upbringing and feel—not gratitude, exactly—but certainly an appreciation for the fact that it could have been much worse. Her father had given her a good upbringing. In spite of all the pressure he had placed upon her, she had found a way to be happy. She couldn’t be angry with him now, and she didn’t want to end their time together on a sour note any more than he did.

“You mean something to me too, Father,” she assured him. “I’m grateful for everything you’ve done for me, truly. I know you’ll do just as well for Edwina now that it’s her turn to find a match.”

“Edwina will have an easier time than you did, I daresay.”

“I’m sure she will.” If that was supposed to be a hurtful remark, it wasn’t going to work. Lavinia wasn’t going to allow it to get to her. “We should go, Father—the carriage is waiting.”

They went down the stairs and joined Edwina and Matthew for the ride to the church. Lavinia didn’t speak much during the ride, nor was she expected to, thankfully. Edwina did all the talking, allowing Lavinia to sit back in her seat and ponder her thoughts. Once or twice, she did make eye contact with Matthew, and her brother smiled at her.

Lavinia could sense his pride in her. They had spoken only once about the kiss he had witnessed in the garden, and Matthew no longer passed any sort of judgment against that event now that he understood it had been based on a love so powerful that neither of them had been able to resist it.

He still didn’t quite understand how she felt, Lavinia thought. He didn’t know what it was like to love someone so much that you couldn’t control your actions—that the only thing that mattered was being with that person. She hoped her brother would find love like that one day, but for now, it would have to wait.

They arrived at the church, and Lavinia felt as if everything that happened was part of a wonderful dream.

As her father walked her down the aisle, she was aware of how picturesque the moment was—how everyone around her saw the beauty of a young lady in a stunning gown being escorted by her loving father. No one saw the turmoil that hid below the surface in her family, and that was for the best. No one needed to. Seth knew all about it and loved her anyway.

The world came into focus when he took her hand. She looked up into his dark eyes, those eyes that had stolen her breath away the first moment they had met and held her captive ever since. Looking at him now, she knew that she had never had a chance. She had been his, right from the start.

“You look absolutely beautiful, he told her quietly. “I’m so glad we’re here.”

She wanted to wrap her arms around him. She wanted to lose herself in an embrace, in a kiss. She wanted to curl up together and talk about the way the rest of their lives would look now that they were to spend them together.

Instead, there was a wedding to get through.

It occurred to Lavinia, as she spoke her vows, that for many ladies this might be the most exciting part of the whole affair. Many ladies might be so excited at the prospect of marrying a handsome duke that they might have no joy at all at the thought of what was to come next.

It was the way she would have felt if she had married Lord Hennington—and she was grateful that marrying him had not been her fate. She was grateful that she had achieved what she’d dreamed of and found someone she could love, even though—perhaps especially because—that love had come about in such an unlikely way.

She wasn’t sad at all when the wedding ceremony was over. “You look radiant,” Seth whispered to her as they receded down the aisle to the carriage that waited to return them to her father’s home. “I know I’m supposed to allow our wedding guests a chance to dance with you, but I must admit, I’m going to have a hard time letting go of you this evening. I may want to claim every dance.”

Lavinia laughed. “Why, Your Grace, I never would have believed that you would stoop to such unseemly behavior.”

“Me? Unseemly?”

“I learned everything I know about how to conduct myself at social events from you, in case you’ve forgotten,” she told him. “And I’m sure you would have told me to never monopolize someone’s time at a ball, no matter how much I liked them.”

“Well, I’ve never been very good at taking my own advice,” Seth said. “I told myself to never fall in love, after all, and yet here we are.”

“Neither of us proved to be very good at taking your advice,” Lavinia said. “I think you would have told me to just marry Lord Hennington, if I had asked you.”

“I thought that was your choice,” he admitted. “You did say you didn’t want to marry me.”

“I still can’t believe you thought that was the truth.”

“I didn’t have any reason to doubt you,” Seth pointed out. “My only question about it was what had changed—as I’ve told you. But I’m very glad it wasn’t true.” He chuckled. “You can’t imagine the way it felt to come to your home and tell you that I wanted to marry you knowing that the answer might very well be no.”

“I’m glad you did,” Lavinia whispered.

They had reached the carriage. He opened the door and helped her inside. The moment the door closed behind them, Lavinia felt an overwhelming surge of relief. It was powerful and wonderful. At last, she was alone with her husband.

He reached out and took her hand. She smiled and allowed it, feeling a thrill at the knowledge that there was nothing to stop them from holding one another’s hands—that there never would be again.

And there would be kisses and deep conversation and hours spent gazing into one another’s eyes, and everything else that came along with a marriage. Lavinia could hardly wait to enjoy all the adventures that lay ahead for her now that she had Seth—the love of her life—by her side. The world seemed bright and full of possibilities that she had never considered before the two of them had met one another.

But for now, it was enough to sit side by side, hand in hand on the way to their wedding ball, and Lavinia felt so full of wonder and contentment just to be holding his hand that she almost hoped they would never reach their destination.

The End?