CHAPTER 44

HE MADE IT ALL THE way to the train station before his instinct prevented him from going any further. He couldn't leave them. It was as impossible as forcing his heart to stop beating, or his lungs to cease drawing air. They were still in danger. Hannah thought the nephew's threats were only about scandal and lawsuits. But he knew better. Gabriel had met his share of monsters in his life, so he knew how to identify one when he saw it. Neil Blackwell was a ruthless man. Rotten to the core. If scandal and law were not enough to get him the dukedom, he wouldn't stop there.

Gabriel was already turning away from the platform, striding out of the train station before he had even formed a plan. All he knew was that he had to stay close to them. Watch over them. The woman he loved and his son were in danger. He knew it with a deep certainty that was as strong as it was unexplainable.

But where to stay? Hannah wouldn't countenance his staying in the house. She was afraid of the scandal. Yet he needed to be close to them in order to protect them. He wouldn't be of any use staying in the village inn.

The folly! Of course. It was close enough that he had a good view of the house, but retired enough that he wouldn't be immediately discovered. The place of their encounters would now be his refuge and post to look over them. He doubted Hannah would visit it soon.

His course set, he started making plans. First, he needed to gather some supplies and send a message to Thakur. A telescope or field glasses were essential in order to better watch the house. And some food, enough for a few days, so he wouldn't have to be coming to the village often. Food was easy. But he didn't know if he would be able to find a telescope in the village.

As it happened, luck was on his side. He saw one displayed in the bookshop window. The owner had been all too glad to sell it, as it had been a special order that the client had refused to buy. The telescope wasn't of the highest quality, but it would do for his purposes.

Two hours later, telescope and provisions in hand, he was approaching the folly on the duke's estate. The door was locked. Of course it was. But one of the unsavory skills he had picked up in his youth was how to pick locks. This one wasn't even difficult to pick.

As soon as he stepped inside, a wave of nostalgia hit him like a blow to the chest. He had never been here without his duchess. And despite her essence permeating everything in the space, until even the air smelled of her perfume, her absence felt like an insatiable void.

He shook his head, attempting to dislodge the melancholy. He was being maudlin and absurd. She wasn't dead. He hadn't even lost her for good. She was right there across the park. Yet, she might have been on the moon, so impassable was the distance. Regardless, he set the telescope on the tripod by the window and pointed it towards the house. He could see little through the Abbey's windows during daylight, but at night, he would be able to see better into the lit rooms. He knew the nursery faced this side of the house.

When night came, he was indeed rewarded with the sight of Hannah and Samuel. She was pacing the nursery with their son in her arms. The baby appeared to be crying. He couldn't hear the sound over the distance, but his contorted little face left no doubt about it. Worry swamped him. Why was his son crying? Oh, what he wouldn't give to be there with them. Hold the wee one in his arms. Whisper soothing words.

Nonsense, of course. Everyone knew babies cried from time to time. It was nothing to worry about. As he watched, she turned away from the window and sat with her son in her arms, holding him to her breast. Little Samuel's face became placid as he settled to nurse.

Gabriel smiled tenderly. And yet the urge to hold him in his arms didn't leave him. He had to get to his son. He was still not close enough to protect them effectively. But how? The secret passages! Of course. Once, they had allowed him to be present for the birth of his child. Now, he would use them to protect his son.

THAT NIGHT, HE APPROACHED the outside entrance to the tunnels. The door was in the overgrown cloister gardens of the abbey. An ancient yew tree stood sentinel over a forgotten corner. A fake stone panel covered with vines and other wild vegetation slid aside to reveal a narrow staircase descending into darkness—the secret gateway to the abbey's hidden tunnels.

Taking care to shield the lamp he carried, he plunged into the bowels of the house. He had studied the plans obtained from the duke, and his sense of direction was flawless, honed by his years in the military, where he sometimes had to lead troops through unknown and often hostile territory. In no time at all, he had reached the main part of the house and the corridor that marched behind the main bedchambers.

The temptation to go to Hannah was powerful. She probably would not object to him visiting her this way. She had all but suggested that they meet in secret. Was he being a fool to reject such an offer? For allowing his pride to stand in the way of what they both clearly wanted? No.

As much as he wanted her—and he did, with every fiber of his being—he was tired of being a secret. Of receiving only stolen moments that could never see the light of day. The next time he made love to her would be as her husband. He deserved that. They both did. She was just too afraid to recognize it.

Climbing another flight of stairs, he came to the nursery floor, and from there, to his son's room. He peered through the hidden peephole and listened for sounds but heard none. Knowing that the nurse slept in the next room, he silently slipped from his hiding place and went to the crib. Little Samuel slept peacefully, the image of a happy and well-cared-for baby.

It was incredible, the immense pull this tiny person had on his heart and his emotions. He had not made a sound, but as he watched, the baby opened his eyes and stared at him. He froze, transfixed by his son's gaze and the certainty that Samuel was about to cry and wake the nurse.

But the baby didn't cry. His rosebud mouth stretched in a happy smile, and he gurgled as if delighted to see his papa. It was the first smile his son gave him.

Unable to help himself, he reached out and lifted the baby, cradling him in his arms. The tiny little hands reached for him, clumsily swatting at his face. His heart melted at that moment. He was sure of it. He could actually feel the warmth spreading through his chest. Or maybe the warmth was piss. A startled laugh escaped him, before he reminded himself of the need for absolute silence.

"Oh, you naughty boy," he whispered. "Is this your idea of a prank?"

"Coo, coo," the baby gurgled.

"Shh. You must be quiet. Papa is not supposed to be here. This will be our little secret, yes?"

But he was now in a predicament. He couldn't very well leave his son wet. But how do you change a baby's nappy? He laid the baby back down on the crib to figure out the logistics. It seemed straightforward enough. And next to the crib, on a dresser, there were several folded linen cloths. He unfastened the safety pins with relative ease. The nappy took some tucking and folding and tugging to get into position, but he finally managed some decent wrap that he thought would stay in place.

By this time, the baby's eyes were closing, but he kept blinking sleepily as if not wanting to let go of this moment between them. So he crouched next to the crib and caressed his son's head, feeling the downy fluff.

"Don't worry, little one," he whispered. "Sleep well. Papa will be here tomorrow. And the day after that. I promise."

The baby finally slept. But Gabriel didn't sleep. He sat on the chair by the crib and watched his son sleep. After a long time, when he heard the nurse stirring in the room next door, he sneaked back into the tunnel. He watched from the shadows as the young woman came and checked on the baby.

"Well, you sure got your nappy in a twist, didn't you?" she murmured, making Gabriel smile. If she only knew.

He thought she would nurse Samuel, but she lifted the baby and walked out with him in her arms. He followed her from his place within the tunnels to the duchess's chamber. When Hannah sat with their son to nurse him, he averted his eyes. It seemed wrong somehow to watch her in secret.

But that night, he learned their routine. And formed a plan to better protect them.