49. All We Have Left

49. All We Have Left

Marilynn

“Niles,” I gasp.

He’s hanging from the wall with fresh burns on his sides, wincing as he tries to take deep breaths in and out. Warrose is next to him, staring straight ahead without blinking, as if he’s in a trance.

I turn around, taking a step back as I watch Skylenna gripping the sides of Kaspias’s face. He’s on his knees in front of her, eyes rolling back in his head.

“Get us down, Mar,” Niles pleads.

I nod with a racing heart, dashing to his side to unbolt the iron contraptions around different parts of his body. “What happened?” I ask him.

Niles grunts as I unlock one of his ankles. “They did something to Dessin. Something about making him see Skylenna differently. And then she fucked up Masten, not sure how. Ow, fuck, easy!”

Spinning around with a weight dropping into my belly, I see him on the floor. The man who harassed me, who tried to kill me, who made my life hell for so long. Masten.

“What did she do to him?” I ask.

Niles drops down after the last manacle is lifted. “Honestly, I don’t know. He’s been seizing like that since she touched him.”

Every fiber in me is begging to ask her what happened. But I know that will have to wait until later on. Right now, we need to get out of here before anyone discovers what she’s done.

Niles works on freeing Warrose while I unscrew all of Dessin’s restraints. After unclamping his forearm, I glance up at his eyes that I didn’t realize are wide open. I do a double take, scanning his flexed jaw, lowered lids, and bulging veins in his neck. It’s as if he is choking on a fit of resentment, cold with brimming hostility.

What happened?

Working on his last bar, I shout over my shoulder, “Let’s go, Skylenna!”

Not a sound escapes her. She just stands there, hovering over Kaspias.

“Leave her,” Dessin orders, bitterness twisting through his words.

What? Tugging his last leg free, I glower up at his towering height. It takes me a solid moment to consider if this is actually Dessin. Why is there so much hate etched across his face?

“Dessin,” I say carefully.

“I said, leave her. Let’s go. Now!”

I flinch away from his thundering voice. What the hell is going on?

“It’s okay. Go.” Skylenna’s voice is barely an octave above a whisper. A sound coming from far away, withdrawn and distracted.

“But…” Niles huffs, stepping toward her.

“Go,” she repeats.

Warrose puts a hand on my back and taps Niles on the shoulder, guiding us toward the exit. I shuffle past Dessin, but before exiting, I glance back at Skylenna.

And time, though fickle and cruel, takes pity on them. For no more than a few seconds.

Skylenna looks back at Dessin, meeting his murky glare with a yearning that makes my own heart break. Her eyes are so red, they almost look like they’re filled with blood surrounding her two emerald irises. Three tears slip down her gaunt cheeks, falling straight to the brimstone floor.

And Dessin is the one to finally turn away, jerking his head forward for me to follow him out.

~

Dessin

The image of her demonicface won’t leave me.

Not as I replace Ruth’s bandages.

Not as I find medicine for her to take.

Not as Niles grills me with questions.

She’s all I can think about in the worst way imaginable. Skylenna has been a demon sent straight from hell to ruin me and all I’ve lived for since I was a child. How could she stand there and pretend like she loved me? How could she act so innocent? So kind and gentle? I know her games and awful tricks. I’ve lived them for far too long. We all have. Every alter knows what she is capable of.

“I know it’s hard for you, Dess. But you have to tell us what’s going on in your head,” Warrose says in a low but demanding tone.

Ruth tries to sit up to hear what I have to say.

“What’s there to talk about? The demon is up to her old tricks again. That’s the end of it.”

Warrose raises his brows, meeting eyes with Ruth in confusion.

“What demon?” he asks.

I roll my eyes. “Don’t make me say her fucking name.”

He stares at me for a long moment, sorting something out in his head. He blows out a breath, running a large hand through his thick hair. “Oh Christ, man, tell me you’re not talking about Skylenna.”

Her name singes my skin like acid. I taste blood as rage runs red through my mind. I have multiple flashbacks of her evil antics that replay at the mention of her name. I’ve spent my life trying to avoid that trigger.

“Why?” Ruth asks weakly. “What did she do?”

I glower down at her incredulously. “What the fuck didn’t she do?!”

Ruth recoils at my rising voice, and it makes me flush with shame. She’s done nothing to deserve the side effects of my anger.

“She’s made my life a fiery pit of hell,” I respond reluctantly.

Warrose crosses his arms and sighs. “They’ve fucked up his memories of her. Created this emotional response.”

“How do we fix it?” Niles’s jaw drops.

“Ironically, I think Skylenna is the only one who can fix it now.”

Red pours into my vision as I picture that demon’s face again.

“Stop. Saying. Her. Name.”

“You truly hate her?” Ruth inquires quietly.

I’m practically drunk with hatred.“With every fiber of my being.”

How can they even ask these questions right now? They know what she’s done to me. To all of us. She’s the reason Kane lost his baby brother and mother. She’s the demon that put us in the prison, that tortured me every single day in that asylum. She’s the trigger for every alter split, every form of trauma that we have worked so hard to recover from. Why are they acting like the demon’s spell worked on them? Did she convince them of her lies that she loves me?

“Do you all…believe her new story she’s telling?” I ask slowly as if I’m speaking to unintelligent children that need hand-holding.

The group looks around at each other, hesitant to answer. As if they’re afraid of making me angry.

“It isn’t a story. It’s your life,” Marilynn finally says.

I scoff. “So, she has gotten to all of you. Was it Mind Phantoms?”

“It was. But not on us. The Mind Phantoms were given to you by Kaspias. Not her.” Warrose watches me carefully with those piercing eyes that make me want to hit him. He’s cautious of any movement I make. Like I’m some feral animal he’s found scrounging for food in a ditch.

If it were Mind Phantoms, we wouldn’t all be affected by it, Kalidus clarifies.

But Warrose is giving me that look he used to give us as a child. The one where he’s waiting for me to solve a problem that he already knows the answer to. I rub my hands over my face, grinding my teeth against the confusion and frustration gnawing at my bones.

Take a breath. You’re okay, honey,Kane’s mother says, pushing to the front.

I’m not okay. Everything is pounding and rotting with an ache. My heart rate picks up as Warrose continues talking, something about Kane loving this girl his entire childhood. About protecting the demon. About meeting her in the asylum and falling in love. Disgust rolls through me like a rogue wave. My stomach heaves, and I wipe my hand over the sweat forming against my brow.

Breathe with me Dessin, Sophia murmurs, trying harder to reach me.

The dissociation affects my vision first. In and out of focus. I suddenly feel a disorienting amount of spaciness. Have I been sitting here staring at the floor for a few seconds or minutes? Hours? A few different alters crowd the front, flooding my thoughts and attention