Chapter 17

17

A fter she escaped the castle, it seemed like her captor eased his chains around her. Of course, it helped that her walk about had eased the ache in her chest. She wasn't misting so much, and that made him more likely to allow her to wander.

Of course, she still had her chains. He'd set up three portals in her room, each on a wall beside each other. They all went to different places. One to a poolroom where he had said she could "exercise". Another to the kitchens, where he had allowed her time to make her own food in the ploy that she would feel more self sufficient. And the last was to his office. She planned to never use that portal.

Lilith had decided she didn't need this man, nor did she intend to make it easy for him to be around her. After their evening in bed when he had disappeared, she was disinclined to give him any more attention than necessary.

In short, he had angered her.

She'd offered herself on a silver platter, even if she hadn't realized what she was offering or asking for. And he had rejected her. Without hesitation . He'd tempted her, made her realize that she might see him as more than just the demon king, and then he'd left. It reached right into a very sensitive part of her heart and reminded her that she wasn't really wanted by anyone. Not even by him.

Let the man rot. And if he changed his mind, she had no interest in what he had to say to explain himself. She was going to live here on her own, as self sufficient as he would let her, and then she would ignore that he existed.

Not that it was very hard. Envy didn't even try to visit her again for a whole week after he'd set up the portals. Such behavior only made her even more angry at him.

Thus, she found herself in the only room that she could tolerate that wasn't her own bedroom. The kitchen only reminded her that he thought, as a woman, she would enjoy cooking. Which was an entirely ridiculous thought that made her cheeks burn with rage. So she ended up in the poolroom.

It was a pretty room. The pool was larger than any pool she'd ever seen, taking up more space than the entire circus had taken up. There were rungs all around it for people to exit the water, and then deep recesses in the floor beside it that were filled with pillows. Obviously, for people to rest and enjoy themselves. Unfortunately, that also meant that she imagined other people here, and that made her sad.

She missed being around people. If only to disappear into their lives, so she didn't have to think about her own.

Instead, she'd rummaged around in all the places that Envy likely didn't want her to look. It didn't matter that he hadn't given her permission to look through his things. She was here. Therefore, she did what she wanted.

Lilith spent almost an entire day going through every single drawer in the kitchen. Someone had gone through and taken all the knives out, so she wasn't sure how he expected her to cook. And anything that could be deemed as "dangerous" was whisked away the next moment that she was in the room.

Clearly, he didn't trust her not to kill herself. But the pool room had a few interesting items. Bathing suits, for one. She had seen them on women before. Long dresses that were made out of light material so they wouldn't yank a woman down into the depths. She cared little for those, though.

Lilith did swim. Not to exercise as he wanted her to do, but because of sheer boredom. And she swam naked.

As a lady did.

But then she became bored again. There was nothing and no one here for her, so she rummaged some more.

The pool room was clearly meant for entertaining. There were all manner of musical instruments hidden in alcoves and a few surprising items like charcoal and easels. All she had to do was find the paper, which took a few more days as well.

But then she could do what she used to love to do. Painting and drawing had always been a talent that she had nurtured throughout her life. The older she got, however, the less time there was to draw. Still, she had always loved painting.

Charcoal would have to do.

Taking a blank page and turning it into something beautiful always made her heart soar. It took a long time to do. She made quite a few mistakes and balled up the pages before tossing them onto the ground in frustration. But eventually she worked on a piece that made her feel quite happy.

It was just the pool room. Lilith found it easier to draw what was right in front of her than something from memory. But she'd given the room a little more life. More plants. More people. When she looked at her drawing, it made the room feel like it was a place she wanted to be.

Looking over the edge of the easel into reality, however, made it difficult to stay here. All she wanted was to dive into that drawing and to live with the people she'd conjured on the page. But that wasn't ever going to be possible because she was alone in this echoing room with nothing but charcoal stained fingers and a hole where her heart used to be.

Sighing, she rubbed the charcoal into her skin a little harder. Almost as though she could press the thought into existence. She just didn't want to be alone anymore.

Lilith didn't do well alone. Her thoughts were dangerous beasts.

"You're quite good at that." The voice interrupted her anxieties and, for a moment, she felt a spark of hope.

Someone was here. Someone who could talk with her and listen and maybe, if she was very nice, they would let her sneak into their mind and see their future. Just a taste. It was better than existing in her own life.

But then she recognized the voice and remembered she wanted absolutely nothing to do with the man who stood behind her.

Stiffening, she tried very hard to look prim and proper and as if she didn't care at all that he was in the room. "I have drawn my whole life," she replied, trying to sound prissy so maybe he would leave. "A lady learns how to draw very early."

"That's interesting. Only a few kingdoms teach young women that skill." He came around to her side, leaning down to inspect her cross hatching. "And considering you don't have the look or the teachings of someone from Lust's kingdom, I would guess you are from Pride's?"

A spark of something burned in the back of her mind. She hadn't remembered where she was from, only that the oracular order was very particular about certain things.

"Perhaps it was Pride's kingdom," she replied, trying very hard to seem as though she didn't care. "It means little. I'm not there now."

"No, you are not. You are with me and I am quite pleased by that. My brother would be so decidedly disappointed to know that he wasn't the one who caught you." Envy smiled at her.

Lilith had to scold herself upon seeing the expression, because she wanted to melt. He was not a good man. He'd kidnapped her. Denied her the drug that she needed to live. And now he kept her captive and limited to three rooms where she was to be sequestered until she gave in and decided that if she could only have his attention, then that was better than nothing.

It was not better than nothing. Not in the slightest.

"I see you are here to annoy me again," she said.

"I like to think I do more than annoy you."

"Oh, well, that is true." Lilith waited to see that interesting shade of hope in his eyes before she dashed it. "You also make me very angry."

Her intent had been to run him off with that, but it seemed to have the opposite effect. Instead, he burst into laughter and dragged a chair over to sit beside her. "Is that so? I hadn't guessed that I made you so angry, oracle."

"You make me ridiculously angry."

"The last time we saw each other, I didn't think you were... irritable."

The suggestion in his words was nearly enough to make her bite him. He was eluding to the moment where she had kissed him. Where he had kissed her. Where they had kissed each other in a very horrible choice that neither of them should have made. It was a silly moment and one she should not repeat, no matter how much he begged her to do so.

"I'm not interested in this conversation. If you are only here to talk to me about that moment of weakness between the two of us, then you can leave."

"I have no intention of leaving. I'm more interested in looking at your work."

She refused to even look at him. With her back to him now, she moved her easel and acted as though she was about to start another drawing. She carefully removed this one off the easel, and then laid it on a bench behind her.

But he was still here. He didn't even move as far as she could tell by listening. And the weight of his stare was grinding upon her senses.

"You know," he intoned some time later. "This one kind of looks like breasts if you unfocus your eyes."

That was it.

Spinning around, angry words caught on the tip of her tongue, she glared at him where he was holding one of her drawings. She marched over to him and snatched it out of his grip with a harsh huff of breath. "It does not."

"Oh good, you've decided to acknowledge that I exist." He stood, and she was crowded by his size.

It was so much easier to deal with him when he was sitting down. He was unnaturally large and a man like him shouldn't be so overwhelming with the sheer size of his body. He didn't deserve to have all that stolen power from other people and to be physically intimidating. She didn't like it.

So she stood toe to toe with him, refusing to move as he loomed over her like some hulking beast. "I know you exist. It would be impossible to ignore someone like you."

"Good, I don't like it when you ignore me."

"Do you have a reason for being here, or did you just decide that you were also bored?"

"Bored, are you?" He arched a dark brow and those emerald eyes sparked. "I can think of plenty of ways for you to entertain yourself."

She knew what he meant. How could she not when she could feel the heat wafting off of him? Rather than play into this game he seemed so intent to play, she sniffed loudly and then took a step back.

She took her time looking him up and down, letting her eyes linger on all the parts of him that he likely wanted her to see. The broad expanse of his shoulders. The thickness of his thighs in those tight pants. She even let her eyes trail over the bulge between his legs that seemed to steadily grow underneath her attention until she moved on. All that and more before she met his gaze one more time and then shrugged.

"I think I'd rather find ways to entertain myself alone ."

She turned away from him and ignored the laughter that again burst from his lips. She didn't enjoy that she made him laugh. The sound was altogether too happy for how she had intended for him to react.

And yet, here he was. Far too happy with himself that he had gotten some kind of reaction from her.

"Oh, Lilith." A strong arm snaked around her waist, tugging her into his body until she was wrapped in warm, firm flesh. She could feel his body flexing against hers. The way his wide rib cage expanded with each breath and the hardness of him pressed against her bottom. "You entertain me."

"I don't want to do anything with you," she hissed, but she didn't struggle to get out of his grip.

After all, she was a woman. And he was a particularly strong, handsome man who had wrapped himself around her. Not with any intent, but simply because he wanted to touch her. She might be angry, but she wasn't dead.

"Envy," she said. "You need to let me go."

"Why?" He leaned down, dragging his nose up the side of her neck and breathing her in. "You smell like lilacs."

"That is the soap you left me."

"It smells better on your skin than it ever did in that bottle." Again, he lingered on her scent, his arms tightening around her waist just a bit more. "Why do you want me to let you go?"

"I just want to know why you are here."

He sighed, and the breath stirred her hair. "You said there was only one way for the oracles to grow that herb that you need. Correct?"

"Yes." She said the word hesitantly, stiffening at his words. "Why?"

"I just think that you haven't thought all of this through." He lifted his head from the crook of her neck and then nodded at her drawing. "And you have a talent for drawing, I see."

She had no idea where he was going with this. "I don't see how those two things are related."

"Do you remember what the flower looks like?"

Did she? She had seen it so many times in her life, longed for it for so many years, that she could draw that plant in her sleep. "I know everything about that plant, if that's what you're asking."

"Good." He turned her in his arms, just a little. Enough so that her shoulder was pressed against his chest and she could see that he'd lifted his shirt with his free arm. Exposing a bare part of his ribcage and all the other tattoos that decorated him from his chin all the way to disappearing into his trousers. "See this spot?"

"A rare blank space, I take it."

"I want you to tattoo the herb onto my skin. If you use it after I pull it off my body, then you'll have to tattoo it again, but... I'll let you in on a little secret." He leaned until his lips pressed against her ear, and then growled, "I happen to like pain."