Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty-One

C aroline woke slowly on the morning of her birthday, Dawson's last text from last night running through her mind.

You're my favorite person, and I can't wait to celebrate your birthday with you.

She could hear him saying those words in his deep, cowboy rumble, and his voice always made her warm from the inside out. She wasn't sure she'd ever been anyone's favorite person, and it sure felt nice that she could be that for a man like Dawson.

The sun had started to rise, as summer was getting nearer and nearer, and she finally opened her eyes to check the time. Her alarm hadn't gone off yet, so it couldn't quite be seven a.m., and since Dawson couldn't really take a whole day off from his ranch duties, Caroline wouldn't see him until lunchtime .

She had plans to sleep late—seemed like that wasn't quite working out, though—and spend the morning out in the cool shade of her garden, then shower, and get ready to take Dawson lunch in his office.

They'd spend the afternoon together, and then Dawson had plans for dinner too. He hadn't told her much of what he'd put together for them, and that was just fine with Caroline. She liked a good surprise, and as she sat up and stretched her arms above her head, she exhaled out the past three decades of her life.

"Dear Lord," she prayed. "Thank You for the first thirty years of my life. Thank You for helping me become this woman that I am, and help me to know how to set down the things that need to be put aside so I can continue to become who You want me to be."

She paused, something not quite right with what she'd said. "Who You need me to become."

She usually went from her bed to the shower, but this morning, she padded down the hall to the kitchen in her pajamas.

"Happy birthday, Aunt Caroline!" Judy yelled, as she was already standing on the chair at the dining table.

Caroline grinned and grinned at her. "Thank you, sweetie." She stroked her hand down Judy's hair, which hadn't been brushed for school yet. "Where's your momma?"

"She went outside," Judy said. "We got you this brownie." She had a German chocolate brownie in front of her, and Caroline knew where that had come from. Heidi Ackerman's bakery.

"She's been up early," Caroline said.

"Okay, thanks!" Belle came in the back door as she called to whoever she'd been talking to outside. She turned to face the kitchen, and she strode forward before coming to a complete stop when she saw Caroline. "You're up."

"Yep."

Belle didn't seem happy about that, and she carried a brown box very similar to what they'd get a dozen doughnuts in. "What's that?" Caroline asked.

Belle looked at the box, her eyes coming back to Caroline's wider than before. She hesitated for a couple of seconds, and then she rolled her whole head with her eyes. "Fine. It's not like you wouldn't have found out. I was just hoping— we were just hoping to surprise you."

"I'm surprised," Caroline said. "You've been to the bakery already this morning."

Her sister came over to the table and put the box down. Something that smelled salty and savory lifted from it. "I didn't go to the bakery."

Caroline's surprise grew, but she wasn't sure she should open the box. "Well, someone did. I would've sniffed this out last night when I was looking for something sweet before bed." She offered her sister a smile, hoping Belle's displeasure with Caroline's earlier rising time would disappear .

Belle started to lift the top of the box. "Judy, honey, get Auntie a fork."

Judy jumped down to do that. "Okay, Mama."

Caroline had many questions, but she simply watched as the lid came off the box. Right in front of her, a gourmet breakfast appeared. Clearly homemade, with perfectly cooked over-easy eggs, toast with crunchy Biscoff spread, several strips of bacon, and the crispiest, brownest, most perfect hash browns in the world.

This breakfast had Dawson written all over it. Caroline's insides felt like melting gelatin—warm and ooey and soft and oh-so-comfortable.

"He brought the brownie too," Belle said as she set aside the box top and then sat down. Judy arrived with a fork and Caroline had no choice but to take it.

"Happy birthday, Auntie," Judy chirped.

"Thank you, sweetie," Caroline murmured. She looked over to Belle. It had been a couple of weeks since Caroline had brought Dawson home after church. That hadn't gone over well with Belle, and she and Dawson had ended up going out for lunch.

"He coordinated this with you?"

Belle nodded, her expression turning to one of something softer. More appreciative. "Yes, he did."

"And you?—?"

"He's a very sweet man," Belle said. "Are we going to talk about this to death?"

Caroline looked at the breakfast in front of her. " No," she said. "We're not. I'm going to eat, and then I'm going to go check on my peas and carrots."

And she did exactly that, thoughts of Dawson and how "very sweet" he was foaming through her in every minute.

By the time she knocked on his barn-office door, he'd texted her several times—something he didn't normally do—and a bouquet of flowers and one of balloons had shown up at the house.

The lunch she carried felt extremely inadequate, and Caroline actually questioned whether Dawson would be able to do this every year for every birthday. Or for every anniversary. Or if she'd influenced him to do all these things.

"Of course you did," she muttered, not sure if she was happy about that or not.

Then the door swung inward, and Dawson stood there. "Hey, you." He grinned at her and took the bag of food she'd brought. "C'mon in. I brought in another chair for you."

"How thoughtful," she said as she stepped up and into his small office. She'd been here a few times in the past, but not for a while. Dawson was pretty protective of his space, and Caroline had tried to be respectful of that .

His whiteboard with his sticky notes hung from the wall on her right, and she couldn't stop herself from looking at it. She found blue, yellow, green, tan, white, and pink notes there, and he'd told her he used specific colors for specific things.

His writing was cramped and small, and she didn't linger there, trying to read any of his reminders.

"You brought the pizza pasta," he said, pulling things from the bag. "This is great." He smiled at her, and Caroline quickly closed the door behind her, as Dawson didn't like to lose his air conditioning.

"Dawson," she said, really stretching out his name.

He looked up, clearly sensing something. "What's wrong?"

Caroline realized then that her eyes had filled with tears. "It's just—there's no way you'll ever be able to do this again next year, and I'm just freaking out a little that you've gone way overboard for my birthday, and we haven't even done the afternoon or evening stuff yet."

She sniffled, pure embarrassment running through her. Dawson straightened and simply looked at her. She shook her head. "This is so silly, I know. I told you birthdays and stuff were a big deal to me, and now I'm upset that you've made it a big deal?"

"Did I?" he asked. "It was the texts in the morning, right? I never do that."

She wiped her eyes, and her brain finally recognized the teasing quality of his voice.

"Or it was that breakfast. I knew it would be cold by the time it got to you, but God told me it would be okay. I'll have a word with Him about it."

Caroline burst out laughing, glad when Dawson allowed a smile to come to his face too. He took her into a hug, and Caroline wanted to stand in his arms forever and ever. Within the strength of his chest, he could protect her from the negative things in the world. With him so close, she didn't have to worry about what plagued her.

"Happy birthday, darlin'," he drawled, his mouth right at her ear. "I didn't think I'd gone over-the-top, but if you think I have, I apologize. I just want you to feel important today, because you're really important to me."

You're really important to me.

Caroline didn't think better words could be spoken, and her eyes burned with unshed tears again. She clung to him until she felt certain she wouldn't break down into sobs when she stepped back. "You hungry?" She couldn't quite look at him, and he gave her the time she wanted to put herself back together.

"Yes, ma'am," he murmured.

They settled down to eat, and Caroline's heartbeat didn't quite calm back into its normal rhythm. Dawson finished before her, and finally, when she only had a couple of bites left, he said, "Talk to me, sweetheart."

"I guess I…what are we doing this afternoon?"

He ducked his head, which didn't exactly comfort Caroline. "You said you wanted to see The Bridge on the River Kwai , and it's playing this afternoon at the Maven. I got us tickets to that."

"Mm."

"The deluxe package," he said. "With the candy and the soda pop and the popcorn, so I should've warned you before you started eating lunch."

Caroline had eaten a lot, but she'd always have room for movie theater popcorn. "And tonight?"

"Dinner," he said. "Miggliano's. If I'd have known you'd bring Italian for lunch, I'd have chosen somewhere else for dinner." He finally looked up at her. "Too much?"

Caroline wasn't sure. She honestly wasn't sure why her thoughts and feelings zipped left and right inside her. "What if I said I wanted to cancel it all, and we could, I don't know, go back to your cabin and just lie on the couch together, talking? Could we do that?"

Dawson didn't answer right away, which somehow made her appreciate him more. "We could," he said. "If that's what you want." He took both of her hands in his. "But I'm confused. You wanted a big deal. I sent breakfast and flowers. That's normal boyfriend stuff, isn't it? And dinner and a movie? It's nothing special."

"I don't know," she said.

"It feels kind of boring to me," he said. "But Miggliano's is a nice place. Very romantic. But a cold breakfast and some flowers? Snooze fest."

"And the brownie," she said. "And the balloons. And I'm in your office, where you never let me come." She raised her eyebrows at him, but Dawson simply gazed evenly back at her.

"My mother wanted a couple loaves of bread from the bakery," he said. "Your brownie was an afterthought. The balloons came with the flowers. And I needed to work, thus, I needed you to come to me for lunch. That's even more unromantic."

"Dawson."

"Caroline."

She looked at him, and she wasn't sure why she'd started to dig this hole. Lord , she thought, and God performed a miracle for her. He opened her mind and heart, and Dawson Rhinehart waltzed right into both.

"I love that you brought breakfast," she said. "Even if it was a little on the cold side." She squeezed his hands. "I love that you talked to my sister about my birthday and that you coordinated things with her this morning, and I adore the idea of dinner and a movie."

She leaned toward him, adding to their game. "I adore you, Dawson."

"Good," he whispered as she neared, obviously about to kiss him. "Because I adore you too."

He kissed her and kissed her, and when he finally pulled away, Caroline couldn't catch her breath. "So, it's a yes to dinner and a movie, or you want to lie on my couch and talk this afternoon? "

Caroline giggled and buried her face in his chest. "I want to do what you planned for us, baby."

"Okay," he said. "Then we only have a few more minutes for kissing. That movie is almost three hours long, you know."

"Mm, I think it's okay if we miss the first few minutes," she said just before she kissed him again. And she decided in that moment that all the physical tokens—the flowers, the brownie, the breakfast—didn't matter.

Kissing Dawson on her birthday was the best thing he could do for her, because it ironed flat all the jagged edges inside her.

Caroline knew she'd have to do something about those on her own, but for now, kissing Dawson was enough.