Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

‘S o how long do you think the storm will last?’ Kira asked as she studied her letter tiles. They had found an ancient Scrabble board in the back of the closet Kira had been using for her towels and it was now laid out between them on the mattress.

After their shower, he’d built the fire back up and it crackled and popped, filling the room with warmth and calm. They’d just finished what Kira called a snowstorm-empty-the-refrigerator-charcuterie-board for their dinner. It consisted of cheese and crackers, several types of pickles, leftover rotisserie chicken from the little grocery store in town, grapes, and chocolate-covered almonds that Kira bought in bulk. It was delicious.

‘Seems like it’s already winding down.’ He’d been avoiding looking out the window for a while now, not wanting to confirm that the snow had significantly slowed down, although the wind continued to rattle Kira’s old windows.

Kira looked up at him, a trace of worry between her brows. ‘Roads are probably still bad though,’ she said.

Bennett bit down on his smile. She didn’t want him to go. Which was good since he was in no hurry to leave, either. A fact he was trying very hard to ignore.

‘Probably. I doubt they’ll get the roads cleared until morning.’

Kira blew out a little sigh and arranged her letters on the board. ‘ Touch . Double word score.’

‘Nice one,’ he said, smirking at the board. Kira had already played, lick, taste, nibble, clench , and hard . She was winning. In more ways than one. He was half hard again thinking about how and where he wanted to lick, taste, and touch her.

She grinned at him in that wide-open way that he’d just discovered about her. It was unexpected. She was unexpected. This whole day had gone so differently than he’d planned this morning when he left the house. It felt like a lifetime ago that he decided staying away from Kira was the best course of action.

He didn’t know who that Bennett was anymore. The one who’d never seen this goofy Kira grin. The one who’d never seen her naked, kissed her skin, felt her come. He didn’t envy that guy. That guy was severely missing out.

The fact that he would be that guy again soon, the guy without Kira in his life, weighed heavy in his gut.

‘How do you think the dogs are doing?’ she asked, distracting him from his thoughts.

‘Probably being spoiled by my sister,’ he said. He grabbed his phone to check for messages from Jeanie. Nicole’s name flashed on the screen as soon as he turned it back on, but he swiped away her texts without reading them. He was finally ready to put his toxic relationship with her behind him.

‘Jeanie sent pics,’ he said, holding up his phone for Kira to see. The dogs were snuggled in front of Logan’s fireplace sound asleep.

Kira giggled. ‘I guess they’re settled in.’

‘They don’t even miss me.’

She was studying him as he put the phone down.

‘What?’

She gave a little shrug. ‘Between the condoms in your wallet and sending the dogs off to a babysitter … seems like you planned this whole thing.’

He huffed a self-deprecating laugh. ‘And I thought I was swearing you off for good.’

She smirked. ‘Guess it didn’t work.’

‘Guess not. My subconscious knew what I was up to.’

Kira fidgeted with her letter tiles, rearranging them on her rack. She blew out a little sigh before she spoke. ‘I’m not like her.’

His eyebrows rose in surprise.

‘I mean, I just want you to know, I’m not trying to like, use you and leave you … but that’s kinda the situation we’re in … and I don’t want you to … I don’t know … hate me?’

‘I won’t hate you. We both know what this is. It’s entirely different than me uprooting my life for Nicole. This is just two people who mutually agreed to have a fun snow day.’

Is that what this was?

‘Right.’ She nodded but still wasn’t meeting his eye.

‘I don’t leave until after New Year’s,’ he said, forgetting about the game, forgetting about why he should stay away from Kira.

‘Okay…’ Her gaze met his again, suspicion in her dark eyes.

‘Let’s extend this thing.’

She raised a brow. ‘You want to keep playing old board games and eating the scraps from my pantry?’

‘Yes.’

Kira laughed. ‘Okay, Bennett.’

‘I do. I want to do all of that. I want to do … whatever. I just want some more time with you.’ If all Kira wanted to do was hang out for the rest of his time here, he’d be into it. He just wanted to see her again and he was out of dumb excuses to come up here. He wanted to come see her, just to come see her.

She stopped laughing, the look on her face somewhere between incredulous and afraid. ‘I don’t know if that’s a good idea.’

Ben nodded, taking his gaze back to the board, not wanting to pressure her. He played the word please and caught Kira’s small smile when she read it.

‘Won’t it make things harder when you have to go?’ she asked, her voice small, as though she didn’t want to ask the question, like it revealed more than she meant to.

‘Maybe. But I like you. I want to spend time with you.’

‘You keep saying that.’

‘Saying what?’

‘That you like me.’

‘Because I do. Why does that surprise you?’

She shrugged like she didn’t care, but her face told him otherwise. ‘I guess I’ve never been particularly likable before. I mean people liked me for my money or the places I could get them into, or they liked me long enough to sleep with me, but’—she laughed a little, a bitter sound— ‘yeah, I guess people don’t typically just like me.’

‘Then they obviously don’t know you.’

‘Ben.’ She sighed, but he couldn’t help his smile because he liked it when she called him that.

‘Yeah?’

‘You don’t have to be so damn sweet all the time.’ She was scowling at him like she was angry, but the next word she played was good boy which was technically two words but he decided to allow it.

‘So … is that a yes, then?’

Kira blew out a long sigh, like he was trying her patience, but her lips had tipped up in the corner. ‘Under one condition.’

‘Okay, name it.’

‘At the end of this … thing … you need to go home.’

‘Kira. Of course, I’m going home.’

‘No, I mean it. I am a mess, Ben. I will continue to be a mess for the foreseeable future. This whole farm will be a mess. You absolutely cannot get it in your head that you are going to somehow stay here and fix it, fix me.’

‘I don’t want to fix you. You don’t need fixing.’

She scoffed, but that was bullshit, so he grabbed her wrists, making her pay attention. ‘I think it’s awesome that you are starting over, that you are trying to do better, but don’t ever for one second let anyone make you think you need fixing. Do you understand me?’ His voice was rougher than he intended, but he needed her to know this. He’d wanted to help her, to keep her warm and safe, but he had never once thought that she needed him to fix things for her.

Her eyes widened in surprise, the color high in her cheeks. Her pulse raced beneath his fingers. He relaxed his grip.

‘Sorry.’

She pulled her hands from his and swiped the Scrabble board off the bed in an instant. The tiles scattered across the wood floor.

‘Kira, what?—’

She tackled him before he could ask what the hell was going on. She kissed him hard on the mouth, before pulling back. ‘You stupid, sweet, infuriating man.’ She kissed him, a little softer this time. ‘I like you, too.’

He smiled. ‘Sorry.’

‘Yeah, me, too. I really tried not to.’

‘I know.’

‘But you have to promise me, you’ll go,’ she whispered. ‘After New Year’s, you’ll go back home to your real life. I might get selfish … fall back into old habits. I might try to keep you.’

He nodded, feeling his cheeks flush, liking the idea of her wanting him to stay a little too much. But no, he wasn’t going down that road again. ‘I’ll go.’ Of course he would go. He had a life to get back to. This was a vacation, a Christmas fling. Just because he wanted to extend it a little longer didn’t mean he’d forgotten the dangers of giving up everything to fit into someone else’s life. He was determined not to do that again.

No matter how tempting Kira might be.

‘Okay.’ Kira nodded. ‘Deal.’

‘There’s something else I have to tell you.’

‘Okay…’

‘The whole town thinks there’s a dead body buried somewhere on your farm, and they sent me here to find it.’

* * *

‘The whole town thinks what?!’ Obviously, Bennett’s solid body beneath her had impaired her hearing somehow, because what he’d just said made absolutely no sense.

He winced. ‘The town thinks the old owner buried a body here. They didn’t want you to find it and be … traumatized … I guess. Honestly, their reasoning is all a little fuzzy at this point.’

Kira pushed up on his chest, but she wasn’t in a hurry to move off of him completely. Bennett was very comfortable. ‘And why do they think this?’

‘Something about a cryptic letter left behind after he died. The town seems split between a possible dead body and some kind of treasure, or maybe money…’

‘Treasure?! Money?! Bennett!’

His eyes widened as her voice rose.

‘If there is a treasure on this farm, I need it!’

He let out a chuckle and she felt it rumble through her chest. ‘I don’t think there’s anything here, Peaches.’

She didn’t bother to correct the nickname. It was growing on her. The fact that he’d wanted to give her one was growing on her, too.

‘That’s probably what that cryptic list was all about, the treasure!’

‘Kira…’

‘And I found his will. Edwin didn’t have many relatives. He left a lot of stuff here in the house. Maybe there is something valuable here.’

‘It seems unlikely.’

‘Oh, and why is that, detective? You did such a thorough search while you were walking your dogs and banging around in my basement?’

‘What was I supposed to do? Start digging holes between your trees?’

‘You were supposed to tell me!’

‘Right. Sorry about that. But in my defense…’

She rolled her eyes but was having trouble keeping the smile off her face. Especially since Bennett had started rubbing up and down her back with his big warm hands.

‘You didn’t seem open to input when I first met you.’

She huffed and he laughed.

‘And after that, I just wanted an excuse to keep coming up here.’

‘Because of your love of Christmas trees and bad hot chocolate?’ she teased.

‘Yep, that was exactly it.’ He planted a kiss on her chin, and she tipped toward him, letting him capture her lips. ‘Oh, and I love to be verbally abused by local business owners.’

She giggled and he kissed the sound from her lips.

Kira had been undervaluing kissing her entire life. Kissing Bennett, being kissed by him, was an event in and of itself. And right now, it was lazy and delicious and warm. She felt like she could do this forever, kiss him in front of a crackling fire.

She didn’t want it to end.

Stretched out on top of him, his hands on her body, Kira had never felt more content.

It was scary.

And dangerous.

She pulled away and sat up, straddling a rosy-cheeked, swollen-lipped Bennett and he looked so damn good it scared her even more.

It was going to hurt like hell when he left.

And if she was already a half-person without Chloe, how much of herself would even be left?

How had she let this happen?

Why was she incapable of making a single good decision?

‘What happened?’ he asked, brow suddenly furrowed in concern.

Kira bristled. ‘What do you mean? Nothing happened. I just needed some … oxygen.’

Bennett watched her, one hand running idly up and down her thigh. ‘Okay.’

‘So are there any other details about this treasure? Like a map or something?’

‘Sorry to disappoint you, but I’m pretty sure this is just a crazy town rumor.’

She frowned. ‘Right. Probably.’

‘Hey, come here.’ He tugged her back down and her body went without her permission. He was so warm and comfortable, she couldn’t help it. Bennett was a bad decision wrapped in a good decision package, but it was too late to fight it now.

He rolled them a bit and tucked her into his side.

I could live here.

She sighed and he misinterpreted her change in mood.

‘I am sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. And I’m sorry I got your hopes up, but the farm is doing great and I’m sure you’ll have a shiny new boiler in no time.’

‘Sure, yeah, probably.’ Maybe if she started selling her organs along with Christmas trees she could fix up the whole house.

He rested his chin on the top of her head and she nuzzled her face in the crook of his neck. This. This spot right here was where she would set up her new home if she could. She was such an idiot.

‘You’re doing great, Kira.’

And she didn’t know if it was his words or his hands stroking her hair or the warm fire or this crazy day, but her feelings threatened to overwhelm her again. It was a rare thing for someone to tell her she was doing a good job and actually mean it.

She sniffled a little and Bennett tried to pull back to see her face, but she clung tight to him like a desperate little barnacle. She wasn’t ready to leave this warm cove of his body yet. Not until she was forced to.

‘I’m fine. Just … just keep doing that to my hair.’

She felt his soft laugh ruffle her hair.

‘At your service, Peaches.’