Chapter 17

Chapter

Seventeen

9 9 is able to convince the lord general to delay the fleet's deployment by a single day. Enough time for them to send a cold but strategic message to Cosima's beacon, announcing I have requested to be brought to my home world. The temple is required to reply with assurance that if Viathan uses their resources to bring me back, then I will be offered amnesty.

Cosima's almost immediate answer is cold, but the atonement ritual is offered again by the elder who sends it on the priestess order's collective behalf.

August's ship is also cleared to land near the Estate without conflict, deploying at the same time as 99 and the fleet stationing in the birthlands for the remainder of the conjunction.

Our last day is spent entirely making final preparations. 99 all but demands us to run through the details of our plan another time as we load August's ship with supplies. The only possession I am taking with me is the priestess gown, a replica of the one I left Cosima wearing. Black with simple lines and a veil, Lady Anne's creation based on 99's description of the only one he saw me in.

"Calliape and I will be in the safe house, waiting for you to either arrive or call out to her," August says, stacking a crate in the corner of his ship's cargo hull.

I nod, picturing the illuminated map from the estate to the safe house. I will need to memorize details of the red trail while we are in transit.

"August will send an update to me after he delivers you and periodically throughout." 99 empties a metal crate of weapons, organizing them into a lit-up compartment in the wall. "The moment you arrive in the safe house or call out to Calliape, I will mobilize from the birthlands to the Estate."

He has been adamant that I only have until the start of the final conjunction eclipse, when the entire planet is shrouded in darkness, to meet them, with or without the proof I need. An event marked by celebration and temple rituals throughout the city, an easy shroud of cover to move through it if needed.

"My ship will be docked near the safe house. It's in the same bay," August says.

99 stands in the middle of the cargo hull, shoulders stiff with hands on his hips. I know he is holding back so much, trying to be the calm foundation we all draw confidence from, but his discomfort is written in the blank pauses through our tether.

He sighs. "The Emperor of Cosima has approved your request for return, and everything has been done within accordance of three worlds' law. But we would be foolish to think this will go smoothly with the priestess order. I need a promise you will call out to Calliape if a situation occurs that you cannot get out of."

"Yes, of course." I smile tightly at her as we each take a side of a heavy crate.

Calliape can fold the distance to extract me at any moment. It's a last resort and would completely compromise the mission, but it's an undeniable comfort knowing she can intervene if things do not go as planned.

August stacks the last supply tote and straps the towers we created against the wall and down to the metal floor.

Calliape and I idle toward the door, wondering if it's truly time to leave for the night and meet again in the morning for official departure.

"Alright!" August announces. "I am sick of going over the plan and what could go wrong. I refuse to spend our last night that way."

"What else is there to do?" Calliape asks and quickly moves out of the way when he brushes by us.

"Tradition." He slams the side of his fist into the door's command panel and smiles as it seals us in.

"August," 99 warns, not amused by the sudden break from the intense strategy session.

In return, August wags a finger at him and then marches to the metal ladder that leads to the rest of the ship, disappearing up into the next level.

"Where are you going?" I shout.

"I will need at least one of you to help me! The rest . . . stay put," he calls down.

Calliape's huffing laugh is cut short as she folds the distance from the cargo hull to whatever August is doing in the ship.

99 still has the same surly posture when I turn back to him.

"We should keep going over the plan." He clenches his fists.

I unfold two of the metal chairs attached to the wall, making myself comfortable, and pat the one next to me. "What do you think they are doing?"

"He wants us to eat a meal in the hull . . . Superstitious." He joins me and leans back, stretching his long legs out into the space.

"Or a welcome distraction."

"I don't need a distraction, Ferren." He lets out an exasperated sigh and removes his helmet, placing it at our feet.

"We have gone over everything countless times. The stone retrieval was not even this thorough," I joke.

"It is not the same." His tone is blunt, shrouded in the fear of losing me, but then his knuckle runs along the top of my thigh. "I did not love you then."

I place my hand on the side of his face, pulling away his fixated stare of where he touches me. "99, we will be successful again, and no, it is not the same because we are not the same as before, but you have to know, First Mother herself could not keep me from returning to you."

He leans in and kisses me, releasing a throaty sigh.

"Oh, sorry," Calliape says as she descends the metal ladder, the echo of her boots making me jump.

I smile, certain my cheeks are flush, and quickly smooth out the fabric on my leg where 99's soft touch turned gripping the moment I pressed my lips to his.

"Coming down!" August announces as he expertly descends the ladder with a lidded metal pot.

It's full of ship stew with its gel-like consistency, which only takes moments to heat up in the food warmers.

Calliape pushes a tote over with her foot and hands 99 and me bowls for the traditional last dinner in the cargo hull before we depart tomorrow morning.

August eagerly serves us, slopping the contents into our bowls and chatting about the artificial smelling flavors.

We are together as a family, crowded around a tote at the bottom of the ship, and it's perfect. Calliape looks happy while August does his best to make us laugh, spouting exaggerated tales of delivering goods to strange people far off and away.

I lean against 99's side as we eat and eventually feel the bounce of his huffing laugh as he listens to the ridiculous story.

I soak it all in, memorizing each of their faces and voices to hold onto when I am back on Cosima, so that I can use these memories as a beacon if I find myself lost there.

I hold 99's hand as we slowly make our way back to our home. We are both content to float around in our tether, savoring the entanglement of being in the other person's tired thoughts.

After our meal, Calliape decided to stay the night on the ship, placing her things in the private room near the pilot's suite. August began some last-minute maintenance tasks, ones even 99 seemed to think unnecessary, but the need to keep busy is understandable.

99 sits while I remove his armor, insisting I do it myself. He holds onto the back of my thighs as I work the clasps, his forehead resting lazily between my breasts while I massage the tense, corded muscles on his shoulder. His grumbly response to my touch is so deep that I can feel the vibrations against my skin.

I run my fingers through the top of his hair, prompting him to look up at me, then I trace the deep lines in 99's brow, attempting to smooth out the furrow still present.

His eyes look so dark in the low light of the room. They dance around my face like he is memorizing every tiny detail. His lips pull up in the smallest hint of a smile before he kisses me with such tenderness that it becomes excruciating not to have his body fully fitted against mine.

And when he carries me to our bed, we make love for the last time in our little home, off the busy market street, in the Viathan capital. It's sweet and slow but altogether heartbreaking.

I have never seen this number of Viathan commanders before. They line the courtyard in tight groups, lifeless and facing away from the massive ship that juts up into the sky like a black metal building.

August's ship is miniaturized next to it as we stand at the bottom of the cargo hull doors, waiting for the lord general to see us off. The three of us are the first to leave, and 99 and the fleet will follow shortly after. August's expression is stern as he looks out into the huge courtyard, he takes being appointed as my transporter very seriously.

The groups of commanders become impossibly straight as the lord general and 99 walk into the courtyard. Their presence is so thick, each one draws their shoulders back a little more as 99 passes.

A chill runs through my body as 99 locks in on me, his powerful form sauntering across the landing area full of hundreds of commanders, all at his charge.

I can barely breathe as he approaches. I know he is coming to say goodbye.

He won't tell me to stay; he has no intention of taking the chance to save my sister away from me. But seeing him now, all I want is for him to ascend our ship's ramp and come with me.

I need him. I trust my light to protect me, but I need him too.

As he reaches me, he removes his helmet and slams it into the stomach of the commander nearest him to hold.

His strong hand is on the back of my neck before I can say anything, pulling me into a deep, unashamed kiss in front of the fleet. He kisses me as if we are the only two people in the courtyard and the hundreds of commanders are not watching his every move.

I plummet into the depths of our tether, seeking out and memorizing every amber corner, knees weak by the crash of emotion it brings knowing he is kissing me goodbye.

When we break away, he holds my chin, his breath still fanning my kiss-swollen lips as he speaks. "I will be waiting for you in the birthlands, Priestess. Find the evidence you need so I can come to you."

I quickly swipe away the tears falling down my cheeks, but he catches a few with a gentle caress of his thumb. I was not expecting this to feel so impossible that my fingers would clutch at him, refusing to let go.

"I will stay tethered as long as I can, but I don't know how far it will reach," I say, the words catching in my throat like spikes as they are spoken.

He nods. We both dread the moment we cannot feel each other in our minds' eyes, when the ship is far enough away that my gifts can't hold on to our link any longer and that special part of us slips away.

In the group of capital workers huddled to watch the spectacle, I notice a frantically waving hand. I stare at the man towering over the rest of the people, and when I squint, he raises both arms, crossing them as if to get my attention.

99 curiously follows my eyeline, to the cluster of people by the capital archway.

I am so enmeshed in his mind that the moment he sees the man, I know who it is.

"Allister is here?" I ask 99 when he turns back to me.

"I sent him a message that we were deploying to Cosima."

"He is seeing you off?" I ask, assuming he is here for his son.

"He knows you are going to save your sister. He came for you."

"He did?" I wave back.

99 nods.

Allister smiles so broadly, my heart aches, then his expression changes to something else. There is so much written on his face that I can see his wrinkles from across the courtyard. This means more to him than just saying goodbye.

"You are braver than both of us." 99's fingertips graze over the fern pin in my hair.

Suddenly, it's heavier, pulling and reminding me it cannot come with me either.

My strands snag as I undo the clasp. "Keep it safe." I push it into his hand, folding his fingertips over the top.

His shoulders fall in an exhale, and my only comfort is knowing he will put it back in place when we are together again.

"I will do everything I can, this I pledge to you." He closes his fist tighter around the pin. "You have my heart, Ferren."

"I love you, 99."

" I love you too," he says into our tether, savoring its strength that will soon dwindle out.

Turning away from him to walk up the ship's ramp is like pushing myself to go deeper underwater, my body begging me to turn back, to surface and take a breath. I force myself to focus on Calliape's and August's footsteps right behind me, supporting each step I take.