chapter thirty-eight

Thea's head pounded like there was an army of hammering men trying to smash their way out of her skull. She blinked her eyes open, her lashes sticking together from what must have been a long sleep. Nausea instantly washed over her. The pain was terrible, knocking against her brain and drilling into her thoughts from all angles.

What happened?

She reached for her aching forehead, then jumped when her hand touched something cool and damp. There was a cloth stretched across her forehead. It must have been fresh, because it was blissfully cool compared to her warm skin. She decided to leave the rag in place and tried to get a better bearing on where she was. Her last memories came trickling back to her in slow, painful flashes. She remembered running, tossing aside the rose, and then...

Smack.

She winced as the memory of the rock hitting her skull resonated through her bones. They didn't even hesitate to hit her with everything they had. It was a miracle she was awake now. They must have narrowly avoided hitting her hard enough to kill.

So if I'm not dead... then where am I?

The first thing she noticed was the soft padding underneath her. She looked down, careful not to let the cool rag slide off her forehead as she got a better look at what she was lying on. Her vision was still a little blurry, but it only took a glance for her to recognize it as Zared's bed.

I'm back in the cave?

Her vision started to clear up after that, and she quickly recognized the sanctuary of the hidden cave and the smell of the freshwater spring that filled the room with a light mist. The smokey smell of the fire flooded the room, too. Standing over the flames, tending the fire with his usual scrap of metal, was the beast himself, looking more solemn than he had when she first met him.

"Z-Zared?" Thea squeaked, testing her voice for the first time in who knew how long.

Zared dropped the scrap of metal, his neck nearly snapping from how fast he turned to look at her. "Thea!" He rushed to her side, his heavy steps clacking on the stone before he kneeled beside the bed and consumed her with those vibrant eyes. "You're awake! Thank Fairmyth... I was so worried. How do you feel?"

It should have been a simple question, but Thea could hardly focus on herself when she was so distracted by Zared's haggard appearance. He'd always been a bit scruffy and rough around the edges, but he looked completely depleted now. His eyes were missing their usual light, shadowed by what must have been either exhaustion or trauma. His fur was knotted around his horns—where he usually rubbed his head when he was frustrated—and even his voice felt fragile, like he was worried he might crack even further.

"I've been better," Thea said as she attempted to sit up in bed, only for Zared to gently hold her back down.

"Don't move, you took a nasty blow to the head and are probably dizzy," Zared commanded, lightly pressing on Thea's shoulder until she eased back onto the pillow.

Wait, pillow?

Zared's bed had never had a pillow before, but underneath Thea's head was something soft and gentle on her skull. She noticed it was sloppily sewn together with what appeared to be thread harvested from old fabric, but whatever it was stuffed with was so much softer than any fabric, and it smelled like.. .

"Roses?" Thea guessed out loud.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Is the scent bothering you?" Zared asked.

"No, not at all. I just wasn't sure if that's what I was smelling. Are they in the pillow?"

"Ah, yes," Zared answered shyly as he twirled his claws together. "There aren't a lot of soft things down here, even within my collection. So, I harvested some of the rose petals from the other bushes and tried to make you a pillow. I hope it's not too uncomfortable."

He harvested his roses? The ones he nearly killed me over when we first met?

Thea's heart stuttered, the floral smell becoming sweeter by the second as she imagined Zared hand plucking each petal from his precious bushes.

"You didn't have to go to such lengths for me," Thea said between flutters in her stomach. No one had ever done something so kind for her... "You loved those roses."

"I loved the hope they gave me," Zared said in a somber tone, his eyes latched to Thea's like she was the only sun in the dark caverns. "Ever since you arrived, my hope has been placed elsewhere. The roses meant nothing compared to helping you recover."

He reached for her forehead to brush a stray hair from her eyes, using the edge of his claw to gently smooth it away from her skin. The touch tickled, jolting tingles across her head that distracted her from the lingering pain. She loved how sweet his touch could be, even with the threat of his claws. His fingers lingered on the side of her face for a moment, his skin warm and soothing in the drafty cave. She didn't want him to pull away, her hand itching to reach out and touch his face in exchange. Would he even let her touch his face?

"I'm so relieved you're all right," Zared's deep voice nearly cracked as he slowly withdrew his touch. "When I found the rose, I wasn't sure what to think. I was terrified something had happened to you, and when I found you..." He clenched his fists, his muscles tightening like a compressed spring. "Those men were despicable..."

"Were...?" Thea breathed, her curiosity getting the better of her as she wondered what happened to her attackers.

"They won't hurt anyone ever again," Zared said coldly, sending a tense chill down Thea's spine. "They may not have been sent into the labyrinth for committing a crime, but the evil they did was just as deserving of punishment. I'm sorry, Thea. I couldn't let them hurt anyone ever again—either inside the labyrinth or outside of it."

He looked ashamed, yet at the same time he didn't seem to regret what he had done. In truth, Thea wasn't sure how to perceive Zared's actions. He was an executioner, after all. His purpose in the labyrinth was to grant a swift end to those who were no longer permitted to live a natural life.

"Thank you for protecting me." Thea said, reaching out for Zared's hand. She just needed to connect to him somehow. Needed to prove she wasn't angry at him for defending what he cared about. "I'm sorry you were placed in that position."

His touch softened in hers, and in that moment, nothing about him felt inhuman at all. His hand may have been bigger and his palm a bit rougher, but everything about him felt as normal as could be. She wanted to help him break his curse, yet there was also nothing wrong with him as he was now.

"You left the rose..." he said as he tightened his grip on her hand. "Was it an accident, or..."

"I couldn't let them find it," Thea answered before he could fully ask, her heart squeezing in sync with his tensed hand. "I know what that rose means for you... If they destroyed it—"

"That shouldn't have mattered." Zared shook his head, his horns waving in shadows from the firepit'fdros glow in the background. "My life should never have mattered. Why is it so hard for you to be selfish?"

Thea thought back to her family, and how she had sacrificed her life to secure her father's freedom. It was easy to look at it like a selfless act, but in truth, that was far from it.

"I am selfish," Thea said. "I abandoned my family for the sake of my pride, and I abandoned the rose because I was too weak to see your last hope crushed. Dying would have been easier than living with seeing you suffer."

"Who said I was suffering?" Zared asked, his tone light and wistful. "Thea, I didn't want you to go into Underworth, because for the first time in my existence, I didn't feel like I was on my own. I was selfish, too, because I didn't want to lose you. Staying cursed seemed like a small price to pay."

He'd rather remain cursed than risk losing me through the portal?

Thea shifted upward, just enough to raise her head, but not enough for Zared to complain about her moving too much. The cool cloth slid off her forehead, and she noticed there was healing root paste smeared on the inside of it. He had done so much for her... She couldn't fight the urge to do something in return, yet...

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Thea asked. "Here, in the labyrinth, as long as life allows us?"

"What do you mean? "

"You said you're afraid of me leaving." Thea met his eyes, her heart squeezing the more he dove into her gaze. "I never planned on leaving the labyrinth once I entered. My family should be provided for in my absence, and I doubt Lord Malik will send more men to kill me since he never planned for the first group to make it out alive. If you want me to stay with you, just say the word."

She brushed her finger along his palm, imagining a life spent with only one other person to share her thoughts. This wasn't what she had anticipated to find in the labyrinth, but she was glad that she had. All she ever wanted was a simple life, and protection for her family. She had that here. As long as Ceyden kept his promise, her family would be safe, and Thea never had to fulfill her oath to marry him if she never escaped. She could be happy here, forever sharing stories about the surface with Zared and basking in the magic of the labyrinth.

This was enough.

Zared was enough.

"I want that..." Zared sighed, his tone both longing and reluctant. "But I've been selfish for long enough. The rest of my family may be able to cave into their desires, but I don't want to be like them."

"What do you mean?" Thea blinked at him, unsure what he was trying to imply.

"The portal to Tateron should open in a few days," Zared's tone shifted, his expression growing serious as he let out a long-held breath. "If you're feeling well enough by then, I want you to escape through it with the rose."