Chapter 19

19

Shelby

Me having this kind of control is not my normal.

Then again, I have no normal.

The last person to touch me was Faust. And before that… Faust…

Years and years ago.

My mind doesn't want to replay that night, yet at the same time, it does.

I remember tasting his cock that night too, but for a brief few seconds. Just to taste. Just to lick. Just to feel the huge swell of him inside my mouth for a moment.

Right now though…?

Oh. Fuck.

My inner thighs clench tight as the lower half of my body shakes.

Faust digs his fingers into the back of my head, driving me down, wanting me deeper, wanting more of his cock inside my mouth. I take all that I can and then some. I'm fighting my body's natural urge to gag. That instinctive warning that I do need to breathe at some point.

The sound of his cock slamming into my mouth…

My spit. My tongue. A very light and gentle almost gargling sound.

I pull back up for a quick second but Faust suddenly chases me.

Thrusting up at me.

"Right there, sweetie," he groans in such a deep, protective voice.

I feel my body just before his does.

I almost gasp when I feel the first warm spurt of his release coat my mouth.

Fuck.

I freeze for a second.

I'm so turned on…

I quickly tighten my mouth's grip and begin to suck him again. Moving with the pulse of his cock. Taking it all. Willingly. Gleefully. As though this is some kind of honor to suck the dick of a star hockey goalie. Even though I don't give a damn about hockey.

It's Faust.

The man who's tempted me for years.

I pull back one last time and release my hold on his cock and finally take a deep breath.

I swallow, then lick my lips.

Faust tucks his cock back into his jeans, grabs me and pulls me on top of him.

I whimper.

His hands go up to the back of my neck and next thing I know he's pulling me down toward him.

He's pulling my mouth down to his.

After what I've just done…

I can't believe how hot this is making me.

His lips touch mine. That's not good enough. He wants more.

His tongue darts into my mouth.

Kissing me after I just gave him head and let him finish in my mouth, has my pussy pulsing.

We keep kissing.

His hands move down to my hips and he pulls me down hard against him.

He begins to gently rock me back and forth.

I'm grinding on him.

I'm humping him.

My panties are soaked and pulling up against my pussy. My clit is being touched in the right way. I do wish it was his tongue. Or his cock.

But this…

"Oh," I groan. "Fuck. Yes…"

Then the feeling hits me.

It hits me hard. Really hard.

My face turns a deep shade of red and burns just as hot.

Ten seconds of dry humping and I'm climaxing.

Whatever. I'm owed this!

I let my body go and enjoy the feeling.

Just as I'm about to let out a satisfying sigh of relief, I hear a voice…

"Mommy?"

I freeze right up and turn my head.

Oakley stands there, holding Bongo.

"What do we do?" Faust whispers to me.

I blink fast. My body is still… reacting …

"Hey, you're supposed to be asleep," I say.

"I heard noises," Oakley says.

"Faust tickled me," I say.

Faust turns his head to look at Oakley. "I didn't realize she was so ticklish. Sorry about that, kiddo."

"Why are you sitting on Faust?" Oakley asks.

I jump back and stand up. "I fell. When he tickled me. In fact, Faust was just leaving. He's nothing but trouble. Right?"

I smile.

Oakley smiles.

Faust clears his throat. "Yeah, I have a tendency to cause trouble where I go. Your mom says you watched some of the hockey game. Sorry I played like crap, kiddo."

Oakley shrugs his shoulders.

"Maybe for the next game, you could be there," Faust says. "I can get you great seats."

"Really?" Oakley asks.

I'm still trying to get my breathing under control.

This whole situation suddenly feels weird .

I know what my body feels right now. I know what I've just done with Faust.

"Okay, Oakley, back to bed," I say. "I'll come tuck you in."

"I can do it myself," he says. "Goodnight. To you both."

Oakley turns and wanders off back to his bedroom.

Faust and I look at each other.

I want him to stay but I know he's going to go.

He runs a hand over his face. "I have to tell you, sweetie, it feels like when we're together it's nothing but trouble."

I couldn't agree more.

The next morning Faust is right back over.

I make coffee and tell him I will cook breakfast. We don't need to order out for every meal.

I lean against the corner of the kitchen, holding my coffee mug.

I'm in pajama pants and a hoodie.

I'm not wearing anything under the hoodie, including a bra.

My nipples scratch against the inside of the hoodie. I would not be pointing this out other than the fact that just by looking at Faust, he makes my nipples hard.

I can feel his eyes burning at me as he stands there.

We make mindless small talk when in reality we both want the same thing.

To jump into a bed and fuck like crazy.

To finally fuck without guilt after all these years.

There's just one thing about that…

"Hey, there he is," Faust calls out.

Oakley is finally awake.

Strutting through the apartment to come give me a hug.

I place my coffee mug on the counter and pick Oakley up.

He still puts his head on my shoulder. I swear he's almost as tall as me already.

I hold him, rock him and savor the moments. I catch myself staring at Faust the entire time though. I suddenly feel like I want to cry.

Over everything he missed out on.

I put Oakley on his feet and he turns, looking at Faust.

Without hesitation, Faust crouches down.

"Morning, kiddo. What do you think? Fist bump? Handshake? High five? Hug? You pick."

Oakley steps toward Faust and next thing I know they're hugging.

I cover my mouth with my right hand.

It's such a subtle yet sweet gesture from Oakley to his father.

It's not a long hug, but a hug is a hug.

"Breakfast?" Oakley asks.

"Sure," I say.

"Can I have a snack?"

"Yes," I say.

"A snack before breakfast?" Faust asks. "Smart kid."

Oakley yawns. "I'm glad you stopped tickling my mom. That woke me up."

Faust laughs so hard he falls back on his ass on the kitchen floor.

That makes me laugh.

Poor Oakley looks around, wondering what the heck is so funny.

This is our first true family moment together…

For Oakley, it's a mostly normal day.

Breakfast. A drive to school. The normal grumblings of not wanting to go to school.

On my ride back to the apartment, I text Dani to see if she wants to come over and see the new place.

She replies with YES .

I send her the address and go home to make another pot of coffee.

Before it finishes brewing, Dani is at the door.

As soon as she steps foot into the apartment, her jaw drops.

"Okay, this can't be real," she says. "You screwed a hockey player and this is what you get out of it?"

"Hey," I say. "That's not fair to say it like that."

Dani looks back at me. "Come on, Shel. I'm kidding. Seriously though, this place is amazing. You and Oakley deserve this."

"I don't know about that," I say. "I'm happy for Oakley. I still have to figure out the school thing with him. He really doesn't like where he's going. And the drive is annoying."

"What about the hot hockey daddy? What does he say?"

"Can you be serious?"

"Sorry. Do I want to ask about…"

"Faust," I whisper. "Yeah. Well. He's my neighbor."

I nod to the wall that Faust and I share.

"Wow," Dani whispers.

"He wants to spoil Oakley. And me. It's just hard. Weird. I caused it all too. I can't get mad at him for anything."

"Why would you get mad? You have a guy that wants to be a father and wants to be involved. Take that as a huge win, Shel. Seriously."

"I know. What if, you know, he gets… revenge …"

"Did you screw him yet?"

"Dani."

"Don't act like that. We're adults here."

I make the grave error in swallowing hard.

Dani smiles and claps. "Yes! You need this! Mamma needs to get laid!"

That makes me laugh.

I walk to the kitchen, shaking my head and pour Dani and I each a cup of coffee.

"I'm not getting laid," I say to her.

"Ah, right," Dani says. " Everything but …?"

"This is complicated. Really complicated. I screwed up, Dani. I stole time from Faust and from our son. How do I explain that?"

"You don't," Dani says. She grabs for my hands. "We all make decisions, Shel. What the hell are we supposed to do? Look back and regret everything? Believe me, I've done this. For a long time. Nathan sat me down not too long ago and told me to cut the shit . He said it in a more loving way but that's what he meant."

I nod.

"I'm not trying to steal your moment here, but believe me, it sucks to constantly look back. You know? I did it. I thought about everything I did in my life. What I ate. Where I traveled. Who I slept with . All of it. Wondering at what point did I screw something up in my body."

"Dani, that's not…"

She tilts her head and I'm shutdown just like that.

"Wow, this conversation went south," I whisper.

"Well, bring it back north," Dani says with a smile. "Where did you suck his cock at in here?"

I gasp and almost throw myself back from the table.

"You said you didn't sleep with him," Dani says. "So I'm assuming…"

Without even thinking straight my eyes look to the couch.

My mind flashes the images of me on my knees before Faust, my lips gliding up and down his thickness.

Dani turns her head and looks at the couch too.

"Good for you, Shel," Dani says.

She starts to laugh and I start to blush.