10. Hot For Teacher

HOT FOR TEACHER

PENELOPE

I woke up with a start, my heart racing as if I'd just run a marathon. The dream had felt so real—Everett's body pressed against mine, his lips mere inches from my own. I could still feel the ghost of his breath on my skin, the electricity crackling between us.

Great snakes of fire. Waking up from sex dreams of Everett was becoming much too regular of an occurrence. Getting laid had not been on my priority list for why I wanted to get a date, not that it would be a terrible thing, well... maybe for the guy. But my own personal battery operated boyfriend was clearly not fulfilling my needs anymore.

It was already completely embarrassing to ask for dating lessons, there was no way I could also ask for sex lessons, even if I needed them. Or so the last guy I'd been with had said.

"Get it together, Pen," I muttered, pressing the heels of my hands against my eyes. This was ridiculous. Everett was just helping me out, teaching me how to date. That almost-kiss on his porch? It was just a lesson in body language. Nothing more.

A lesson I'd replayed in my mind about a thousand billion trillion times.

Somebody was hot for teacher.

I flopped back onto my pillow with a groan. This crush that was getting hotter and heavier by the day was not going to find me a date for the Grampys and it definitely wasn't going to help me maybe someday find a man to fall in love with. And I had absolutely no idea what to do about it.

Work. That's what I'd do. It was the perfect way to ignore my problems. I had plenty. Although Everett had helped me check one thing off my list by helping me find a snake for Kelsey's video. Billy's parents had been more than thrilled, especially given their shiny new snake wrangler and trainer fully paid for by us and the fee we were going to pay them for Snakey's guest appearance.

Poor girl needed a way better name. I'd work on that with Billy. His mom was a total Bestie, so I'm sure I could get her to put in a good word. Oh, oh, or maybe she'd allow us to run a name the snake contest on our socials. That was going on the to-do list ASAP.

I made my way into the office-den and popped open my laptop. The first thing up was to hammer through a bunch of emails. Which should have taken me all of fifteen or thirty minutes. Maybe it wouldn't have taken me so much longer if I hadn't checked my phone about seventeen times to see if anyone, like a dating coach I knew, might have texted me.

He had not. Nada.

Then I took care of a couple of contracts that needed to be signed, and maybe googled best body language to let a guy know you want to be kissed. That led me to FlipFlop and some kind of challenge girls were doing with their boyfriends and husbands. Neither of which I had, so that wasn't all that helpful.

Unless I asked Everett to...

No. Stop it. Back to work.

I made some travel arrangements for me, Kelsey, and the crew. I was not looking forward to doing all the research and planning the hotels and venues for Kelsey's tour this summer. I really wish there was someone whose job it was to go check out potential hotels for Kelsey and the tour staff to stay in all around the world. It would be a pretty cool job for someone who liked to travel.

My to-do list was long, and so far, I'd only checked three-ish things off. I usually got loads done on a Monday morning, but I was so damn distracted.Mondays were Kelsey's new self-care sleep-in days, and I wouldn't even see her up and about before noon. Declan always walked Pooh for her in the morning and brought her breakfast in bed, so it's not like she'd notice if I wasn't here until this afternoon.

Which was probably good, because she'd definitely notice my lack of focus today. Which would lead to questions, questions about what I'd done last night, and with who.

None of which I was ready to tell her.

But I did really need someone to talk this through with me.

Kelsey was out of the question. She was my friend just as much as my boss, but this was the one problem I couldn't take to her. Who else was I even friends with though? My life for the past five years had been all about work. I had all the backup singers and dancers who I was friendly with, but I didn't know if we were actually friends. Not for a crisis like this we weren't.

The next closest almost friends I had were the other Kingman brothers. I'd get teased and treated like a little sister to no end if Flynn or Gryffen ever caught wind of this. So they were definitely not an option.

It wasn't like I was going to call my dad. Although I did need to check in on him. But he wasn't exactly calling me regularly either, so I didn't feel too bad about not talking to him all that often. As long as I kept paying the bill at his retirement community, we were both good to go.

What I needed was a good old-fashioned gal pal. But... who would understand even half of what was going on in my life? Hmm. Maybe Willa, Hayes's new girlfriend? She was new to the Kingman whirlwind too, and we'd hit it off at all the events we'd both been to recently.

My phone buzzed with a text, and I nearly slapped it right off the desk. I caught it just in time before it went tumbling to the floor and was irritated with myself for being disappointed at the name on the screen.

It was Kelsey. Who else would it be? Duh.

Meeting Dec for a late lunch. Tried to see if you wanted to join, but I said your name like five times and you didn't respond. IDK what you're working on so hard, but I'm sure it will be great.

My stomach rumbled, and I realized I'd worked, or possibly daydreamed, my way right through lunch and apparently Kelsey trying to get my attention.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I was dressed and heading to Cool Beans with my laptop tucked under my arm. The excuse of work would give me cover if I chickened out of talking to Willa. Or if Javi was there.

The bell above the door jingled when I stepped inside, and I was immediately hit with the warm aroma of coffee and freshly baked pastries. Yum. This was fast becoming a favorite place in my life. But instead of the expected late afternoon rush of random customers needing a caffeine pick-me-up, I found a group of women, all curvy, plus-size, big girls like me, laughing and chatting animatedly.

"Penelope," Trixie, Chris's fiancée, was in the group and waved me over. "Perfect timing. We're just starting our first plus-size romance book club. Come join us."

I hesitated, my eyes scanning the room for Willa, but she was nowhere to be seen. Jules, Everett's sister, patted the empty seat next to her. "Come on, Pen. We don't bite."

They might not, but the two of them were Kingman women through and through, so this might bite me on the ass. And not in the fun way. With a resigned sigh, but a pasted on smile, I made my way over.

"I haven't read the book." Although weren't lots of book clubs more like wine and whine clubs? I'd never been in one before.

Wait, was this how adult women made friends? Oh my god. It was.

Trixie waved off my concern. "Doesn't matter. We mostly use the books as an excuse to get together for some escape from the world. Although, we are exclusively reading body positive romance novels written by fat women, about fat women, for fat women."

"If you happen to like dragons or fated mates, you're gonna want to read this one." One of the other book clubbers held up a copy of a book that I recognized called Chase Me , because Kelsey owned it. But she wouldn't let me borrow it. Probably because Declan had given it to her as a gift when she'd been ill.

The woman next to her snickered and winked at me. "Yeah, especially if you're into riding your dragon. If you know what I mean."

I glanced over at Jules, who was only seventeen. Was this appropriate for her? She caught me looking. "Don't worry, I'm the one who recommended we kick off the club with this particular book. I've been reading spicy books for years."

Trixie grinned at her. "Under the supervision of your friendly neighborhood former teen librarian who vets the collection."

For the next hour, I found myself swept up in their conversation. We talked about everything from the latest Hollywood gossip to the pros and cons of eBooks versus paperbacks. Not once did anyone bring up diet culture, or shapewear, or look funny at anyone else for ordering a cookie or a double chocolate frozen espresso with extra whip.

It was... nice. Comfortable. I hadn't realized how much I needed this kind of easy female companionship. Especially with other women who had that same kind of confidence that I was trying to obtain. The kind like Kelsey spread around the world with her music.

As the meeting wound down and the other women started to leave, I gathered my things, ready to make my escape. But Trixie and Jules exchanged a look that made me pause.

"So, Pen," Trixie said, her voice casual but her eyes sharp. "What's really going on between you and Everett?"

I froze, my laptop halfway into my bag. "W-what do you mean?"

Jules leaned in, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Oh, come on. We're not blind. The way you two were cozied up at game night? The secret smiles? The whispered conversations?"

"That was just—" I started, but Trixie cut me off.

"And don't think we didn't notice you two sneaking out early," she added with a wink.

"It's not what you think," I said weakly. What in the world was I going to tell them to throw them off the scent? Could I even? There was no way I was going to get away with hiding anything from either of them. "Everett's just... helping me with something."

"Helping you, huh?" Jules wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Is that what the kids are calling it these days?"

I buried my face in my hands, mortified. "Oh my god, no. It's not like that at all. He's just..."

I shouldn't tell them, but I really wanted to. Maybe if I swore them to secrecy? If this blew up in my face, I could handle it. But I didn't want my lack of skills in the dating department to put a wedge between Everett and Declan.

Gah. I was going to risk it. Nothing risked, nothing gained. "He's giving me dating lessons."

The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. I peeked through my fingers to see Trixie and Jules staring at me, mouths agape.

"Dating lessons?" Trixie repeated slowly. "From Everett ‘Love Guru' Kingman?"

I nodded miserably. "And you have to promise not to tell a soul."

Jules let out a low whistle and pulled my hands away from my face. "Tell us everything. And I mean everything."

As I looked at their eager faces, I realized I'd stumbled into something I couldn't escape. With a deep breath, I began to spill the whole story, from my overly awkward dating attempts in high school and college to wanting a red carpet date for the award to spilling coffee to habanero and giraffe facts to the almost-kiss on Everett's porch.

They just let me talk. And talk. And talk. WhenI finished recounting the whole saga, Trixie and Jules exchanged a look that made me nervous.

"Oh, honey," Trixie said, reaching out to pat my hand. "You've got it bad."

I felt my face heat up. "What? No, I don't. This is just... a business arrangement."

Jules snorted. "A business arrangement that involves almost kissing? Come on, Pen."

"It's not like that," I protested...weakly. This was not where I was hoping this conversation was going to go. I'd just have to explain about my plan. I'd left that part out somehow.

"It's exactly like that," Trixie insisted. "Look, it's obvious to anyone with eyes that you two are totally into each other. Why don't you just ask Everett to be your date for the Grampys?"

I shook my head vigorously. "No way. Everett is sure that Declan will murder him for even helping me. Much less being my actual date. He is kind of protective of me. Which I get, but also, I don't even know how to handle that. It's not like I grew up with brothers. You get it, don't you Jules? Besides, haven't you noticed? Everett's not playing his best lately."

Jules's cheeks went supernova and her eyes went wide. "I, uh, definitely do not tell my brothers about any crushes I may or may not have, or any dates with college boys I may or may not go on."

She frowned and pointed at Trixie. "And you're not going to say a word to Chris. He already tells dad that I should be grounded till I'm forty on a regular basis. And I will be going to the winter formal and prom without any of them the wiser."

Trixie held up her hands. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm pretty sure you made me sign the Kingman queen code when I got engaged to your brother, and I will stay loyal to my oath."

Jules narrowed her eyes and nodded. "That's right. Queens have to stick together."

I knew I liked Jules. "Did you make Kelsey sign that too?"

"A hundred percent. And I believe you and Willa can expect contracts in your inbox soon too."

"No, no. Not me. I'm not dating your brother, and I'm not going to ask him to be my date. What I need to do is help him fall in love as a thank you for all his help, and you know, so he can play better."

Trixie's eyebrows shot up. "And how exactly do you plan to do that?"

I bit my lip and then figured I'd told them everything else, I might as well let them in on the plan. Maybe they'd help me execute it better than I'd done so far. "I'm trying to set him up with Simone Tester."

"From the Testers? The fem band that opened for Kelsey at Rust Rocks?" Jules groaned when I nodded yes. "Pen, that's the worst idea I've ever heard. First of all she's not even his type, and honestly, you can't teach someone to fall in love, and you definitely shouldn't try to set up the guy you're clearly crushing on with someone else."

"But—" I started to argue, but Trixie cut me off.

"No buts. Jules is right. This is a disaster waiting to happen. You need to tell Everett how you feel before?—"

The bell above the door jingled, and we all froze as Kelsey, Declan, and Everett walked in.

"Before the coffee gets cold," I said loudly, desperately trying to change the subject. "That's why I love coming here. The coffee's always hot."

Trixie and Jules stared at me like I'd grown a second head but quickly plastered on smiles as the trio approached our table. I was buying the two of them tiaras later.

"Hey, girls," Kelsey said, her eyes darting between us suspiciously. "What are you all up to?"

"Just wrapping up our book club meeting," Trixie said smoothly. "Right, Pen?"

I nodded enthusiastically, praying my face wasn't as red as it felt. "Yep. Books. We love 'em. Can't get enough."

Everett raised an eyebrow, and his gaze shot between me and Jules. "Uh-huh. And what book was that?"

My mind went blank. I couldn't remember the title of the book they'd been discussing for the life of me.

"It was, um..." I stammered.

" Chase Me ," Jules supplied helpfully. "It's about dragons. And romance. You know, typical book club stuff."

Kelsey's eyes lit up. "Oh, I love that book. Declan got it for me when I was sick. Why didn't you tell me you were in a book club, Pen? Is this the secret you've been keeping from me? I would've loved to join."

Everett plopped down into the seat next to me. "Is this a girls only club, or can guys join too? Might be a good place to find a date."

From the depths of made-up imaginary book club hell, I blurted out, "You wouldn't like it. Next month we're reading Snake Women are from Venus ."

He tipped his head at me, looked into my eyes just like he had last night on his front porch, and said, "I think I read the sequel, Snake Tamers are from Mars ."

I only just caught all three of the girls staring at us both open mouthed, and Declan glaring with his arms folded. No one said a word for at least a hundred and two years. Until Dec broke the silence. "You two are so strange."

I'd take strange over busted any day.