Chapter 7

CHAPTER

SEVEN

I lay in my bed staring at the ceiling, trying and failing to sleep. Ethan's snoring didn't help, but the real problem was that my mind was still racing after today.

Charlie and I had made out. More than made out—we'd rutted against each other until we'd come in the stacks, right there where anyone could have walked in. I hadn't known I was that bold—or that Charlie was, for that matter. Or maybe it hadn't been so much boldness as desperation. Either way, it had been amazing, and now I couldn't get Charlie out of my head. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw his blissed-out face as he'd rocked against me, felt the ghost of his fingertips on my skin, relived the way he'd kissed me like he couldn't stop even if he'd wanted to.

I wondered if Charlie was thinking about me too.

I checked the time. After eleven. I told myself that I needed to stop thinking about Charlie Mercer and get some sleep. Instead, I rolled onto my side and reached toward the window. I pushed the curtains open and propped myself up on my elbows so I could get a glimpse of Alpha Tau because apparently what I really needed was to fantasize about meeting Charlie in the alley beside his house and kissing him goodnight.

The upper floors were mostly dark, but there were a couple of windows along the side that were still lit up. I couldn't see Charlie's window from my viewpoint, but I knew which one it was. I might have been struggling with Shakespeare, but when it came to finding my way around places, I had that shit locked down. I could close my eyes and visualize the layout of Alpha Tau just fine from the two times I'd been there, so it wasn't hard to figure out which room was Charlie's based on which door he'd stuck his head out of when I'd seen him during my ill-fated bathroom prank.

I stared at Alpha Tau and considered texting him. But I knew enough about Charlie to realize that he'd shut down any suggestion we meet. He wasn't impulsive like that.

Except, he was, wasn't he? When we got close, all his self-control disappeared. It was as if my presence flicked some switch in his brain that overrode his common sense.

So maybe what I needed to do was go and see him.

I pulled the curtains closed and flopped back down against the bed, groaning into the pillow.

No. That was a terrible idea.

I was banned from Alpha Tau, for fuck's sake. If that guy who had chased me out of the house with his dog caught sight of me I'd be in deep shit.

Disappointment washed over me. There was no way I could go and see Charlie with that guy in the picture.

My earlier conversation with Ethan came back to me, like it had just been waiting in the wings for its big moment.

Didn't Angry Hawaiian Shirt Guy own that bright orange truck? The one that wasn't there?

Ethan had said that the guy—O'Brien—was off campus, and he was the only Alpha Tau I'd really had a run-in with. So maybe this was actually the perfect time to go and visit Charlie.

Charlie hadn't said he didn't want to see me. He'd just said nobody could know. So really, going to Alpha Tau now made the most sense. There was much less chance of anyone catching us this close to midnight, right?

Impulsiveness and caution warred within me, and in the end, I sat up and pulled the curtain aside, telling myself that if the lights were off, I'd take the hint and go to sleep.

They weren't.

And since I couldn't actually see Charlie's window from this angle, I'd have to go outside to check, right? And, you know, if I was already going all the way outside, I might as well cross the street anyway...

I threw back the coverlet and snagged a pair of sweats from the chair next to the bed. I pulled them on over my boxers and shrugged my way into a tee. I eyed the baseball sitting on my nightstand, and a plan formed. I grabbed the ball and my shoes and slipped out the door, closing it as quietly as I could and cutting off the sound of Ethan mid-snore.

I stood on the landing for a moment listening, but the house was quiet apart from the creaks and groans of the timbers settling and the odd murmur of conversation from nearby bedrooms.

Bart had back-to-back classes first thing on a Monday, and he was not a morning person. What that meant for the rest of the Kappas was an unofficial "no bullshit on Sunday nights" policy. Bart would stalk through the house late on Sunday evenings, and his glare was enough to remind everyone that hey, now would be a great time to turn in, actually.

Normally I found it kind of funny, since the rest of the week he couldn't give a flying fuck what anyone did as long as they kept it in-house, but right now I'd never been happier that Bart's schedule sucked.

It meant there was nobody around asking any awkward questions when I crept down the stairs.

I stepped out onto the porch. The street was deserted and still, and I breathed a little easier as I pulled my sneakers on. I jogged toward Alpha Tau, sticking to the shadows as much as possible, and thought about Charlie.

As I got closer, I saw that his light was on .

It blazed bright in the darkness, calling me, and my heart pounded from a combination of nerves and excitement.

The universe was giving me a sign, obviously.

Judging from this morning, he was as into me as I was into him, and maybe this would show him we could work around all that fraternity bullshit. I hoped so, anyway.

When I reached Alpha Tau, I stood in the shadows of a tree— déjà vu, anyone? My nerves jangled. I tossed the baseball from hand to hand, and the familiar feel of it thudding against my palms helped me relax.

Let's do this.

I stepped out from the darkness and tipped my head back to calculate the angle and velocity of my throw and positioned myself to throw. I played shortstop, but I was also a half-decent pitcher when I put my mind to it, so sending the ball where it needed to go wasn't an issue.

I took a deep breath, centering myself the way I did whenever I got on the pitcher's mound. A familiar calm washed over me, and I shook my shoulders out and took a deep breath. I drew my arm back, aiming at the section of wall next to the window, and threw the ball.

Glass shattered, the sound echoing through the quiet.

Shitshitshit.

My gut clenched, and my mouth went dry, panic flooding me. But before I could decide what to do next—my current choices were running away or throwing up on the lawn and then running away—someone appeared at the window.

It wasn't Charlie.

This was a young, finely built guy with dark, messy hair and an intense gaze that threatened to set me on fire even from this distance. "What the fuck ?"

I lifted my hands in the air, palms spread wide, and waved them frantically while slinking across the lawn, looking like some weird-assed combination of an air traffic controller and an interpretive dance major. "Sorry!" I squeaked. "It was an accident!"

Dark-haired guy leaned out past the jagged edges of the window. His eyes narrowed, and he glared at me some more before Charlie's face appeared next to his, eyes wide. "Tanner?"

"Charlie!" Relief flooded through me, but it was short-lived when he scowled at me.

"What the fuck , Tanner?"

That was not the reaction I'd hoped for.

Then again, this was not the romantic gesture I'd imagined.

This? This was a shitshow.

Charlie turned to the other guy—who I could only assume was his roommate—and he must have clued him in, because the guy rolled his eyes, laughed, and threw something. The baseball sailed down and landed in front of me on the grass. Then Charlie turned away, and I heard snatches of conversation floating down on the night air.

"...what? No, it was an accident, that's all." That was Charlie.

"... really sorry, Trey… I was just horsing around with Charlie, and I lost my grip…"

Okay, obviously there was some serious bullshitting going on to someone else up there, and nobody had come racing out the front door screaming about Kappas, so maybe… maybe this wouldn't be a total clusterfuck after all.

Maybe I'd gotten away with it.

My phone buzzed in my pocket.

What the hell, Tanner? You can't just show up and break windows to get my attention!

Or, maybe I was going to have to explain myself and beg forgiveness.

I ducked out of sight behind the big red maple, sliding down to sit at the base of the tree and resting against the trunk as I typed.

The window was an accident. I was aiming for the wall.

Why would you even do that?

I got the feeling Charlie wasn't in the mood for excuses, so I just told him the truth.

To get your attention. I really wanted to see you. So I figured I'd throw the ball, and you'd hear the noise and look outside, and then we could sneak off somewhere.

Wow. Seeing it all laid out like that, this wasn't the genius plan I'd thought it to be, was it?

I'm sorry. I missed you, and I thought it would be romantic. Obviously I'm a dumbass.

Three dots that floated across my screen for what seemed like forever, then he replied.

SUCH a dumbass. We said we were going to be smart about this.

My shoulders slumped. I deserved that. Because wasn't I the one who'd claimed we wouldn't get busted?

My screen lit up again.

I missed you too. Are you still downstairs?

Hope bubbled up in my chest. Perhaps, if Charlie was still talking to me, we could salvage this.

Yeah. Under the big tree.

Jesus, Tanner. Are you trying to get caught?

Wait in the alley. I'll be there soon.

The street was still deserted, which surprised me to be honest—I'd expected the sound of breaking glass to attract more attention. But maybe it wasn't an uncommon occurrence on fraternity row, or everyone was already asleep. Either way I took it as a win and darted up the alleyway, sinking into the shadow of the bushes that were growing there, and waited.

After what felt like forever but was probably only a few minutes, a tall figure ducked into the alleyway. "Tanner?"

I moved into the dim light. "Hey."

Charlie let out a long breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I really want to be mad at you."

"No need. I'm already mad at me."

The dark-haired guy stepped out from behind Charlie, and I recalled seeing him on the landing when I was bolting from Alpha Tau that first time. He was shorter than me and finely built, and he was wearing a hot pink tee and leggings. "This is him?"

"Yeah," Charlie said. "Tanner, this is Briar, my roommate."

"Hey," I said.

Briar didn't respond, just looked me up and down before giving a quick nod. "Okay, I get it. He's super hot. But a Kappa, Charlie? Really?"

"He wasn't one when I met him," Charlie said, "and I didn't expect him to turn up at Lassiter! And now I…"

"Can't help yourself?" Briar said. "I get that."

He and Charlie exchanged a glance that spoke volumes.

Charlie ran a hand through his curls. "So, we were lucky tonight. I told Trey that me and Briar were horsing around and accidentally broke that window, and he took our word for it. He's not thrilled, but he knows shit happens sometimes."

Thank fuck for that. Some of the tension I'd been carrying eased.

"I mean, I did throw a shoe at Charlie's head last week when he wouldn't stop humming, so it wasn't exactly a stretch," Briar said, and then he grinned. "I can't believe Charlie finally looked up from his books long enough to have a crush."

"I don't have a crush," Charlie said, glaring at Briar.

"Sure thing," Briar said. "Anyway, I'm going. I'm only here because I wanted to see the guy who has you making heart eyes at your phone. I'll stay with Casey tonight, and you can take the guest room, since your bed has glass on it." He paused, brow creasing, and amended, "First I'm gonna go clean the glass up in case anyone decides to think too hard about why it fell inward, then I'm going to see Casey."

"Thanks for your help, Briar," I said. "I appreciate it."

He arched a perfect brow. "I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing it for Charlie. Anyway, I gotta go. Casey has the room to himself tonight, and I'm not missing a chance to make him beg." And with that he turned and sashayed back up the alley with the attitude of a guy who knew what he wanted and was about to grab it with both hands.

Whoever Casey was, he was lucky as hell.

And so was I.

Because if Charlie had been really mad, he could have hung me out to dry. But he hadn't. Not only had he and his roommate pulled my ass out of the fire, but he was still here—despite me being a Grade A idiot.

That had to be a good sign, right?

A thought struck me. "Shit, you won't have to pay for the window, will you? Because I can cover it if it's too expensive for you."

Charlie tilted his head back and looked up at the sky, letting out a sigh. He was quiet for long enough that a little ball of worry started to gnaw at me. What if I'd just insulted Charlie by implying he couldn't afford a window?

He dropped his head and held my gaze, expression serious. "I don't care about the window, Tanner. But holy shit, you can't pull stunts like this, okay?"

I nodded like a dashboard bobblehead Elvis.

"We shouldn't do this, but…" His brow creased, his gaze dropping to my mouth, and I could see the moment his resolve crumbled. "Fine, we're not stopping. But next time I'll tell you when and where we meet."

I grinned up at Charlie. "So there's going to be a next time?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah."

I pushed up on my tiptoes, and Charlie wrapped his arms around me and kissed me long and slow. My insides fluttered, and I wanted to run my hands all over him, but I didn't get the chance before he was drawing back with a sigh.

"You're going to be the death of me, Tanner North."

"Like Romeo?" I teased.

Charlie let out a soft laugh. "No, because we're smarter, remember? Now get out of here before someone sees you."

I got the hell out of there.

"Where did you go last night?"

I looked up from my poached eggs. "What?"

I was running on four hours' sleep, and Coach had kicked our ass at the gym again this morning, so the question caught me off guard.

Ethan narrowed his eyes at me across the breakfast table. "You disappeared in the middle of the night and didn't come back for ages. Where'd you go?"

"Um. I couldn't sleep so I went for a night run."

He considered it and seemed to accept it. "Don't be so fucking noisy next time. "

Which was pretty fucking rich coming from the guy who regularly woke me up by stumbling in drunk or stoned. But I didn't say that. Happy Ethan, happy life, or something.

"Sorry." I ducked my head and concentrated on my food.

Ethan grunted and shoved his chair back from the table. He didn't bother to carry his cereal bowl through to the kitchen when he left, and I eyed it with annoyance. We weren't the tidiest fraternity out there, but most of the guys at least made a token effort. Not Ethan, though. He didn't even pretend. And nobody called him out on it—least of all us new guys—because it wasn't a hill worth dying on.

Once I'd finished eating, I went and grabbed my books and headed for class. There was a glazier's truck parked in the driveway of Alpha Tau.

I looked away, guilt twisting in my chest. Breaking the window had been an accident, sure, but it had still been caused by my dumb ass. I hoped Charlie hadn't woken up mad. He'd said last night he wasn't, but maybe in the cold light of day he'd changed his mind.

I pulled out my phone and went to text him, then thought better of it.

He'd been clear—we were being smart. He'd message me.

I shoved my phone into my back pocket.

"Hey." Nash fell into step beside me. He waved a hand toward the glazier's van. "That wasn't you, was it?"

I froze. Had Nash seen something?

I spun to face him, nausea and panic clogging my throat so I had to force the words out. "What?"

He peered at me, brows furrowed. "Whoa, you're kind of pale, bro. Are you okay?"

"What do you mean , was it me?" I demanded, a heartbeat away from a full cardiac event.

"Relax, Tanner. I didn't mean you , you. I meant ‘ one of the Kappas' you."

My pulse stopped thundering quite so loudly in my skull. "Oh."

He snorted. "I mean, it's not like you're the kind of guy who goes round breaking windows, right?"

"Right," I said, as my heart rate slowed, and the tightness in my chest eased. "But I don't think it was the Kappas. Bart read us all the riot act after jello-gate and for a guy who looks like he sells timeshare apartments, he can be terrifying. Nobody's messing with any Alpha Taus."

Okay, technically, I was messing with an Alpha Tau, but Nash didn't need to know that.

Nash looked back at the van and shrugged. "I guess we can ask Charlie tonight at study group."

"Yeah," I said, my voice catching.

The day's classes passed in a blur. I did my best to pay attention and take notes, but I'd be lying if I said any of it sank in. All the real estate in my brain was taken up with Charlie. I just needed to see him and make sure he wasn't mad. I mean, Charlie didn't seem like the type to hold a grudge, but who knew? Maybe he was hiding a temper as fiery as his hair?

I guessed I'd find out soon enough.

Nash was waiting for me outside after supper, and we walked to the library together. We were running late, so by the time we got there, everyone was already sitting in their groups. Awa greeted us with a sunny smile. "Hey! I thought you'd abandoned me."

"Never," I said, scanning the room for Charlie. He was sitting at the far end of the tables next to Amity, their heads close together over an open textbook. I waited for him to look up and acknowledge me, but he seemed oblivious.

Awa followed my gaze. "Isn't he the best?" she said with a small sigh, and I swore I saw cartoon hearts in her eyes.

That wasn't jealousy bubbling up in my gut. It wasn't.

"I've only had two tutoring sessions with him, but it's already helping so much." Awa turned to me. "Hey, if you want, I can share my notes? I know you missed out on one-on-one sessions with him, and honestly, the way he can get to the heart of the text is amazing. He breaks it down so it's super easy to follow."

Okay. Those weren't cartoon hearts in her eyes. They were nerdy admiration hearts. Different thing.

"Thanks, Awa, but Charlie fit me in for some sessions after all." I tried not to squirm under her gaze. "Kind of after hours."

"That's so nice of him!" she gushed. She raised her fingers and waggled them in a wave, and I looked up to see Charlie smiling at her and waving back.

He didn't wave at me, though. His gaze slid right over me.

I tried not to be hurt by that. He wasn't really ignoring me. He was just doing what we'd said and playing it smart.

We got settled and started to work, and when Charlie made his way to our group, he was just as helpful as always. Nash asked about the window, and I held my breath, but Charlie just laughed and told us about his roommate's terrible aim, and if I hadn't known better I would have believed him.

By the time the group was done, I had the beginnings of an outline for my assignment, and that almost made up for the fact that Charlie hadn't spoken to me directly once.

Almost.

I was slow packing up afterward, hoping I'd get a chance to talk to Charlie alone. It didn't happen though. Charlie grabbed his bag and bolted before I could speak to him, and I was left standing in the middle of the library with Nash hovering nearby, waiting to walk back to Fraternity Row with me.

The evening was real nice, with the beginnings of a cool breeze teasing the bare skin of my arms, and we dawdled home. When I got back to Kappa Beta Rho, the living room was crowded with people, and the air was rich with the smell of nachos and beer.

One of the guys waved a hand in greeting as I passed by, and I waved back but headed straight upstairs, knowing the rest of the Kappas wouldn't even notice I hadn't stopped.

I'd somehow had the impression that fraternities were supposed to be tight-knit or something, but Kappa wasn't like that. Even my one-on-ones with my big brother, Marcus, had so far consisted of him asking, "Hey, you good?" and me nodding and then both of us sharing a fist bump.

It was as I was changing into a pair of sleep pants and an old tee that my phone chimed.

It was Charlie.

Goodnight, goodnight. Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say goodnight till it be morrow.

I couldn't stop the smile spreading across my face.

Does that mean we're meeting up tomorrow?

Maybe. Can you make tomorrow night work?

My heart skipped a beat. I thought about my English assignment and the business ethics quiz that I was meant to be studying for and the statistics homework that I'd planned to work on. Taking a night off would have me scrambling to catch up. There was no way I should have even been considering it.

Then I thought of Charlie's blue eyes and soft lips and bright red mess of curls that were so soft to the touch and the way he kissed with his entire body and decided that statistically speaking, the risk of a late assignment was far outweighed by the reward of getting to spend some alone time with Charlie.

I can make it work.