Chapter 6

CHAPTER

SIX

I didn't hear from Charlie until Sunday morning.

I was finishing up folding my laundry—my mom had certain standards that she'd ingrained in me, okay?—and debating between taking a nap or hanging out with Nash when my phone lit up. At the sight of Charlie's name, my insides lit up too.

Hey.

The three dots appeared, vanished, and reappeared.

You busy?

My thumbs flew over the screen.

I'm free for the rest of the day. What did you have in mind?

I can fit you in for extra tutoring if you want.

I blinked at the screen. Did he mean tutoring or tutoring? Either way, I was up for it.

Name the place.

Library in ten? We're studying R and J, Act 1, Scene 5.

I grabbed my copy of the play and flipped through the pages and then burst out laughing.

It was a kissing scene. Of course it was.

Like, that sounded as though we weren't actually going to do much studying, right? This was Charlie flirting, bookworm-style. At least, I really hoped that it was.

Is this a reenactment?

I've booked us an hour in a study room, Tanner. What do you think?

I'll be there in ten minutes.

I took the time to brush my teeth and fix my hair before I left and jogged to the library with a smile on my face. Charlie was waiting for me just inside the entrance hall, and he waved me over. I fell into step beside him as he led me through the library (columns era) and past the library (Gulag zone) to the rear of the building where the private rooms were.

Once we were inside, we set our bags on the desk and stood there like the awkward turtles we were, looking around at everything except each other. Somewhere on the run to the library, Confident and Eager Tanner had been body swapped for It's High School All Over Again Tanner. Who invited that guy? I shuffled my feet and rubbed the back of my neck and kept checking, but no, I still had zero moves.

Then Charlie cleared his throat, said, "Fuck it. We only have an hour," and pushed me down into one of the chairs and climbed into my lap.

Turned out I had zero chill as well, because the second Charlie' s ass hit my thighs, I was all over him. My hands snaked up under the hem of his tee, and I traced the curve of his ribs around the same time that Charlie tangled his fingers in my hair and held me in place for a blistering kiss.

Heat raced through me, and I moaned. It was loud enough that I might have been embarrassed, except Charlie moaned too. When he leaned back and opened his bright blue eyes, he looked as shell-shocked as I felt.

"Wow," he said, the word a breath against my mouth.

"Wow," I echoed. "You think it'll be like that every time?"

He bit his bottom lip, eyes sparkling, and then said, "Let's see."

The second kiss was slower and sweeter, but it lit me up inside just like the first one had. But we were meant to be studying, right? My high school English teacher had always said that repetition was the mother of learning, so it only made sense to kiss Charlie some more. And while there were a hundred other things I wanted to try as well—a million, probably—kissing was too amazing to stop.

Charlie pulled away long enough to shoot me a crooked grin, then his arms slid down around my neck, and he settled himself more firmly in my lap and nipped at my earlobe. He kissed his way along my jaw and back to my mouth, and all I could think, as my nerve endings sparked and want coursed through me, was when did ears become hot zones? If there wasn't an ear category in Pornhub, there needed to be. And then I stopped thinking about anything at all, too distracted by Charlie's soft mouth and the way it fit just right against my own.

We kissed for what seemed like forever before I got brave enough to slide my hands down Charlie's back, over his hips and around to his perfect ass, squeezing lightly. Charlie moaned again and ground down against me, and my dick took an immediate interest.

"Please don't stop," I managed to say.

Stop right now , said the knock on the door .

"Oh, shit!" Charlie leapt off my lap and crossed to the door. He opened it, and there was a girl standing there. "Hey."

"I have this room booked," the girl said.

Five minutes of them pulling up the app and showing each other their email confirmations and finally getting a library staff member involved killed my boner. I sat there staring at my book—it was open but upside down—while the staff member complained that the app was supposed to make sure things like this couldn't happen, but here it was, happening. In the end, he decided that both bookings had been made properly, but since the girl had booked first, the room was hers.

Charlie and I packed up our stuff and left, trailing past the girl and the rest of her study group, who were waiting in the corridor.

"Let's go upstairs," Charlie said, once we were back in the nicer part of the library. "It's pretty quiet up there."

I'd never been up to the top floor. A quick check of the signs on the end of one of the stacks showed me why: 623. Military and Nautical Engineering — 624. Civil Engineering. This part of the library was not for me.

Past the first set of stacks, there were a few rows of empty desks. The tables and chairs were made out of some sort of dark, polished wood, nothing like the utilitarian furniture I'd seen downstairs. But maybe this stuff had been considered basic and hardy about a hundred years ago, and it had been here since then. The chairs creaked gently as we sat down, but they held.

"Um," Charlie said. His face was pink, and he tapped his fingers on the table. "I'm sorry about before."

"I'm not," I said.

He snorted. "Yeah, but I'm supposed to be tutoring you, not..." He waved his hand. "Not that ."

"Really? I thought we were getting together for exactly that?"

Charlie cleared his throat. "Well, we're not meant to be. I am still charging you for today."

I opened my mouth to say it was well worth the money, and I'd happily pay twice the amount, but maybe Charlie would get offended if I implied he was a sex worker. So instead I asked, "How did you get into tutoring?"

Charlie opened his notebook and smoothed the already-smooth page. "My roommate, Briar, needed help last year, and I was his study buddy. I guess I've always been okay at explaining stuff in a way that works? Some teachers are like... well, you know what they're like. They think that teaching is just reading the textbook aloud, but not everyone's brains work like that. Some people are visual learners or kinesthetic learners. Briar was like that. And once we started studying together and his grades improved, he told some other friends of his who were struggling, and the next thing I knew I had people asking me for help. And when they offered to pay, I thought, why not?"

"What's a—a kin?—?"

"A kinesthetic learner," Charlie said. "Well, some people learn by listening, and some people learn by watching, and some people learn by reading and writing. Kinesthetic learners learn by moving."

I picked up my copy of Romeo and Juliet and waved it in the air for a moment. "Like that? I'm getting the words through osmosis?"

Charlie gave a soft laugh. "No. For little kids, it's like you get them to run around and play. But for adults, it could be flash cards or games or roleplay."

"Roleplay?" My heart raced, and I reached out and touched his lips softly before letting my hand drop. "I think I'm a kinesthetic learner, Charlie. You should totally keep teaching me like that."

He leaned closer. "That's fine for the kissing parts, Tanner, but it's gonna get messy when we get to the murders. "

"Worth it," I said.

"No!" He laughed and ducked his head. His eyes were sparkling when he looked up again. "No more kissing during tutoring sessions." He held up a finger before I could protest. "But maybe afterward, if you're a good student."

"Deal!" And then a thought struck me. "Wait. So when we were texting before, and I asked if we'd be reenacting the kiss, and you said ‘What do you think?' you actually did mean it was a tutoring session?"

He blinked at me. "I booked the room, Tanner."

"Huh. But you kissed me."

"Yeah." He turned bright pink. "I did."

"You're a bad boy rulebreaker," I said, "and that's very hot."

"I am not!"

"The bad boy and the jock. I think there's a Pornhub channel for that."

"No, the bad boy is usually the jock," he said. "It's the bad boy jock and the nerdy virgin. Not that I watch Pornhub."

"Clearly."

He snorted and picked his notebook up to hide his face. "Shut up."

"Charlie, like ten minutes ago I was wondering if Pornhub had an ear category."

He squinted at me. "A what?"

"I'm gonna check later and let you know."

He blinked at me, and I wondered if I'd fried his brain.

"Um, so you accidentally got into tutoring through your roommate, and now you have a solid side hustle?" I said, changing the subject with all the delicacy of a blunt object. "That's kind of neat."

"Yeah," he said, shooting me a grateful look. "And it means I don't have to ask my folks for money. I'm on a scholarship, but there are other expenses, you know?" He stared at his notebook, like he was embarrassed or something.

"Well I think it's awesome that you have a scholarship."

He lifted his head, tilting it like he wasn't sure he'd heard me correctly. "Yeah?"

"Charlie, I'm here because I can catch a ball, swing a bat, and run fast. You're here because you understand shit like Shakespeare. I think we can safely say you're the smart one in our relationship."

As soon as I said it, I realized it was a mistake.

Charlie's expression shuttered. "We're not in a relationship, Tanner."

I knew that. It didn't make the way he'd been so quick to point it out sting any less.

"No, obviously."

A crease appeared between Charlie's brows. "Then why did you say it?"

Because I want it to be true.

I didn't say that, though. Instead, I shrugged. "Because ‘you're the smart one in this friend with benefits relationship' sounded awkward in my head? But don't worry. I know what this is."

He fiddled with the cover of his notebook. Stared at it too and then he finally nodded. "Okay. That's good. Because... well, it just wouldn't work."

I wanted to ask why he thought that, but I already knew what his answer would be.

Stupid frat rivalry. Like, who cared if a Kappa and an Alpha got together? It was so dumb.

I opened my copy of Romeo and Juliet and read the introduction. That bit about two houses, both alike in dignity. It was almost funny how accurate it was. Well, apart from the being alike in dignity thing. I was pretty sure that Alpha Tau had us beat on that front, but we had them beat when it came to keg stands and beer pong. Which kind of underscored that thing about dignity, probably.

The point was, rivalry between houses was dumb and pointless back in Shakespeare's day, and it was even dumber now .

"Tanner?" Charlie's voice pulled me out of my thoughts. "You get it, right? There's history there. With, um. Your brother."

Of course. Of course fucking Colt had something to do with this. That asshole had been ruining my life since we were kids, and that was no exaggeration. One of my earliest memories was of Colt pushing me over in the mud because Mom had told us not to get dirty. And then, when I hadn't gotten in any trouble, he'd smacked me in the face. The family Christmas cards that year had featured a smug-looking Colt and me with an impressive shiner that he'd somehow managed to convince my parents was accidental. Like, I knew a lot of brothers roughhoused together, but Colt had always been extra heavy on the rough part.

My parents always chalked it up to "boys will be boys," whatever the fuck that meant, and in the end I'd just avoided Colt as much as I could.

And yet here I was at Lassiter, trying to make a fresh start, and somehow that asshole was ruining my life long-distance.

"Colt has history with everyone who's ever met him," I said. "He's a douche."

Charlie gave me an odd look, as though he hadn't expected me to say something like that about my own brother. But I'd known Colt since the day I was born and I'd had a hell of a long time to form my opinion. I took petty glee in the fact he hadn't been able to keep a job since graduating and was reduced to working part-time as a used car salesman for a friend of our dad's. Like, if you traced the evolution of a dickbag, it went high school bully, douchebag fratboy, used car salesman, right? In ten years, he'd be a sad-sack loser divorcee crying into his beer about how his bitch of an ex-wife was bleeding him dry in child support—assuming he could convince anyone to marry him in the first place.

"What character would Colt be in Romeo?" I asked suddenly. "Like, is there a guy who just ruins people's lives for the hell of it?"

"Hmm," Charlie said. "What do you think?"

"Are you flipping that back on me to get me to learn?" I laughed. "Okay, well, my first thought is Tybalt because he's a dick too, but also, Tybalt can speak in words of more than one syllable, so maybe not."

Charlie laughed too. "Everyone can speak in long words in Shakespeare, even the douchebags. Sometimes, especially the douchebags."

The top stair creaked.

A scruffy looking guy who was older than the average student stepped into the room, giving us a sideways glance before he slunk off between the stacks. I exchanged a glance with Charlie. He raised an eyebrow and mimed lifting pinched-together fingertips to his mouth, and I got it.

The college library wasn't just a place for study groups to meet. It also did a roaring trade in weed.

I shouldn't have been surprised when less than a minute later rapid footsteps echoed, and Ethan appeared at the top of the stairs. He was the kind of guy who had seen all those shitty eighties college movies and had mistaken them for instructional videos. I was just waiting for the day he announced he was throwing a toga party.

Charlie didn't notice him since he was sitting with his back to the stairwell, and I made a point of not glancing in Ethan's direction but focusing on what Charlie was saying about Tybalt. The last thing I wanted was for Ethan to think I was paying attention or worse that I was going to rat him out. Honestly, if someone wanted to soften the edges of their college stress with a little herbal assistance, who was I to judge? I'd never gotten into the whole smoking thing, but that was more because I didn't want to fuck up my fitness than from any kind of moral judgement. Plus, Coach had made a point of telling us that random drug tests were a thing .

Ethan's gaze flickered over us for just a second before he turned away and ducked into the stacks. There was the low murmur of voices and then the scruffy guy left. Ethan followed a minute later, clattering down the stairs.

"...really as much a victim of the feud as any other character," Charlie said. "Because Romeo already crossed Tybalt by going to the party. It's an insult that he can't let stand, which is why he goes after Romeo. Which is when it all goes bad." He wrinkled his nose. "Well, worse."

"Right," I said, even though I'd missed most of everything he'd said.

Charlie rolled his eyes and smiled at me, and I grinned back, and in that moment, I honestly didn't care if I failed English. Charlie's grin was worth it. I mean, Coach probably wouldn't agree though.

When the timer on Charlie's phone went off, we packed up our books. We stood up, but before I could move toward the steps, Charlie grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me into the stacks between 632. Plant Injuries, Diseases and Pests and 626. Animal Husbandry.

"What are you?—?"

He surged forward and kissed me.

It was unexpected, but I was here for it. I grabbed his hips and pressed him into the bookshelf with enough impact that the various plant disease identification texts rattled on the shelf. I held him in place while I kissed him right back.

It was magical. The stacks smelled of dry paper and weed, and it still didn't detract from the miracle that was Charlie Mercer's mouth or the way his tongue swept over the seam of my lips until they parted for him like the Red Sea, and he dove right in. My eyes closed of their own volition as I got lost in everything that made up Charlie—how I had to tilt my head back to kiss him, the silky softness of his curls as I ran a hand through his hair, and the scent of his bodywash—something citrusy and sharp-sweet. The way his fingers dug into my shoulders as though he thought the floor might give way underneath us.

The only thing giving way right now was my knees when I drew back to catch my breath and met his gaze. The look he was giving me, like he wanted to eat me alive, made my heart tumble over a couple of beats and then start racing. I was hard, and I felt a jolt of panic that Charlie must have noticed it—I sure as hell registered his dick pressing into my hip—and tried to tilt my hips away from him. Charlie responded by pushing me back just far enough to shift his hands from my shoulders to my hips, and then he pulled me against him firmly. And then our dicks were aligned more or less—he had to widen his stance to bring himself down to my height—and we were somehow moving together, rubbing hard against each other, the denim of our jeans scraping.

"Tanner," Charlie whispered urgently. His breath was hot and fast against my tingling lips, and then we were kissing again and grinding against each other. I moaned, low and urgent, my dick painfully hard and straining against my jeans.

I was so close. Danger zone, close. I needed to stop right now and get some space between us, except every cell in my body was screaming out to stay right here, dry humping with Charlie in the stacks, because it felt so fucking good.

Potential humiliation who? I didn't know her.

Charlie rocked against me, moving just right, and before I had a chance to pull back, my cock throbbed once, and I was coming. Stars exploded behind my eyelids, and my entire body shook with the force of my orgasm.

Charlie tensed against me, rocked his hips forward one more time, and let out a low moan.

"Oh, shit," I said, resting my forehead on his shoulder. My legs were shaky, and my skin was buzzing, and my underwear was a wet, sticky mess. "Shit."

Charlie laughed softly against me. "Oh shit, we're in the library . "

"I just came in Plant Diseases," I said, still waiting for the burn of humiliation.

But Charlie laughed again, and said " We came in plant diseases, and it was awesome."

I guessed that maybe if we both thought it was funny, I didn't have to feel bad.

My breathing slowed as I came down from my high, but I stayed resting against Charlie, letting him hold my weight. The sex had been amazing, but standing here with Charlie's arm wrapped around my shoulders, sharing our warmth, was pretty nice too.

There was the sound of footsteps on the stairs, and suddenly I was all too aware that my dick was soft, my jeans were damp, and anyone who looked at me would be able to tell I'd just come my brains out.

And yet, humiliation didn't happen. I did grab a book and pretend to be wildly interested in Common Problems with Succulents , but as soon as whoever it was walked past the stack, I shoved it back on a shelf.

Charlie reached past me and placed it on the right shelf, his lips twitching up in a smile. "Nobody comes here, Tanner."

"Not true," I said, grinning. "We just did."

His laughter rang out, echoing through the stacks, and I joined him, still flying high from the best—okay, only—sex of my life.

Charlie might not have considered himself attractive, but I thought he was plenty cute. And he seemed to think the same about me. So what if he didn't want to do more than fool around in secret? I'd take what I could get if it meant I got to spend more time messing around and having fun with Charlie.

Walking back to Fraternity Row was not fun. It would have been nicer if Charlie had been beside me, but he was a couple of minutes behind. He didn't want us to be spotted by either of our fraternities. At the library was one thing—it was his job—but I guessed it would be crossing a line if we were seen hanging together outside of that.

Walking also wasn't fun because my underwear was wet and gross, and I was holding my backpack in front of my jeans and trying to make it look natural. It probably didn't, but luckily most everyone out in the street was at Alpha Tau, cheering on their flag football game with the guys from Theta Phi, so I avoided them by crossing to the other side of the street.

"Look at those assholes," Ethan said when I climbed the porch stairs at Kappa Beta Rho. He was sitting on the porch swing, glaring like a malevolent gargoyle down the street in the direction of Alpha Tau. "They think they're such hot shit."

"Uh," I said, adjusting my backpack. "It's just flag football, bro."

Ethan snorted and held his joint out toward me.

"Nah," I said, waving it away. "But thanks."

Ethan shrugged. "Hey, did you see an orange truck when you were going past those fuckers?"

"Uh, no."

"Huh." Ethan rocked back in the swing for a moment. "Zach thinks O'Brien is planning some retaliation for the whole jello thing, but he's not even on campus. Probably gone to see his dickbag boyfriend."

"Okay," I said.

"Hey, listen," Ethan said. "I like you, North."

"Thanks."

"But you gotta watch yourself, you get me?"

I really didn't.

"I don't give a fuck if you're a—if you're gay," he said.

Wow, good save there, bro.

"But you start hanging with someone like Charlie Mercer, and people are gonna judge you, you know?"

"For what?" I asked .

He snorted. "You're Colt's brother, dude," he said. "Now, that was before my time, but the guy is a fucking legend. How bad's it look that you're hanging with an Alpha Tau? And not just an Alpha Tau but their fucking charity case. Have some goddamn pride, bro."

"Uh, yeah, he's my tutor," I said. "I gotta keep my grades up, and he's hella good."

Ethan took a drag and held his breath, and for a second I thought he was done, but just when I figured it was safe to walk away, he exhaled and said, "You're associating with the enemy, bro."

"I just needed a tutor," I said. "It's not that deep."

Ethan narrowed his eyes at me, then turned his attention back to his joint. "Fucking Alpha Taus," he muttered under his breath. "Can't take a fucking joke."

I ducked inside before he could say anything else. Not just because I didn't want to spend any more time with Ethan, but because I really, really needed to take a shower.

I was pretty sure that Ethan was exaggerating the feud with Alpha Tau.

I mean, how bad could it possibly be?